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bottomboy81 -> RE: Misogyny? (8/27/2008 8:43:54 AM)
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First of all, I think the word “misogyny” is thrown around too lightly and easily. It’s probably thrown around as easily as the suspicions of racism. But the thought of “hatred” seems a much longer distance away from both of them examples when a woman complains about the opposite gender.
Even what I said in my last paragraph will label my ass as a misogynist. No matter if what I said is the truth! It seems like if a man has different views compared to a lot of women when it comes to dating, equality, gender issues etc, he is a misogynist. The only way a man won’t be a misogynist is if he agrees with all the views most women have regarding these types of topics. I know this seems terribly sarcastic but unfortunately it’s the truth. Is there a nicer way to say it?
I consider my self to be a masculinist. Are all masculinist misogynist? Are all feminist misandrist? No! but there is a difference between feminazis and feminist.
My point is, if it’s socially acceptable for one side to have their views (feminist,women), it should be equally socially acceptable for the other side (masculinist,men) to have their different views. Why isn’t it this simple? I think sensitivity is coming before reasoning in this controversy.
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There's misogyny in every group everywhere: the world's steeped in the stuff.
I agree to an extent from what you said. Misogyny is not some thing surprising that you see but its not completely everywhere. I think there is as much misandry in the world today as there is with misogyny.
As to what you said here…
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If you were raised to think of women as less than you, and you buy into that concept
I think this is some thing that was “as common” (as many women make it out to be at this day) at times before the 1960s or a little onwards. I am talking about westernised societies here, not the middle east or asian countries etc. Anyway, I think as times have gone by, the tables have turned.
From what I just said, it may seem like I am veering towards sexism in a political correct view but when a woman expresses that she believes many men place themselves above women, the thoughts about her having issues, being too jaded, being a misandrist, is again, a much longer distance away.
If women are free to think men place themselves above women, it means I am free to think women place themselves above men. Unfortunately, political correctness doesn’t support equal freedom of speech.
Look at this site for an example, as I have said in these forums, most dommes won’t give male subs a chance if they don’t stand out from most in their gender/group. If you don’t stand out from most in your gender but you expect a person from another gender to stand out from most to qualify worthiness, you obliviously think you are superior to that other gender. Being dominant and having d/s relationships is one thing, but thinking a person with a penis is worth less than a person with a pussy is another thing. This is what is happening in the situations when it comes to approaching relationships or casual play. My point is NOT directing towards the situations when you are committed in a d/s relationship, that’s why I used the word “approaching” meaning when it comes to choosing a partner.
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On one hand, they see the objects they desire; on the other hand, are angry they are attracted to it, for whatever reason.
Or it could be that many of these so called misogynist have only faced neglection and rejection for months or years being on this site to an extent that there is not much to feel positive about anymore. These so called misogynist are probably hoping that there is some one different out there but they are not going to brown nose or refuse the annoying truth about how unfair a lot of dommes are to get what they want. I think it’s perfectly being human to show anger in the face of injustice don’t you think? Such as how the “approaching situation” works for most men on here.
Just like how it’s a social norm for a woman to show anger towards men in ways of thinking that most or all men only want to use women for sex, or think in the ways of there are no decent men left, and the other handful of degrading things about men we hear in a daily lives. But does a social norm exist at all for a man to show anger towards the problems he faces in dating? Anything?
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and see woman as no more than fetish lifelines. They first enter into the lifestyle thinking ‘great, loads of kinky domme woman to do’. It’s a bit of a shock when they see that a large proportion are actually ‘dominant’, and don’t wish to be treated as fetish lifelines - and even greater than that, actually seek relationships where they are in control, tell them what to do, and have standards that are incompatible with their desires.
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So, horny little self-serving type kinksters, fail to make any quality contacts
So women who consider themselves as a “top” or “bottom” are also just out to use some one as fetish lifelines and seek relationships where they are in control, tell them what to do, and have standards that are incompatible with their desires, and are basically self serving kinksters?
It never ceases to amaze me when I see many women express that if a man is open about wanting some thing sexual, it means he is controlling and only wanting to use the woman for sex. But it sounds out of place to say that if a woman approaches a man for sex and is open about it, she is controlling and only wanting to use him for sex, am I right? Why do the ideas of selfishness, using, controlling, etc only or mostly apply when it’s the man’s idea or if the man is open about it?
Basically, BOTH have to WANT to be in the experience. If either the man or woman doesn’t want to be in the experience, it means it will never happen or there is rape of course. My point is, if BOTH want to be in the experience (which makes it happen to begin with) how is the man controlling?
All in all, as much hysteria there is about misogyny in this site, there is also another side to the story. I believe many to most dommes in this scene deem male subs as some one who is “guilty until proven innocent”. Meaning a male sub may have to jump hoops or prove himself one way or the other that he is not only wanting to use the domme for kinky sex. Tell me how this is not sexism? If white people deemed black people as some one who may be a potential criminal or anything negative until proven other wise, would this be deemed as racism? If men deemed women as gold diggers or unappreciative entitlement princess until proven otherwise, would it be deemed as sexism? If my first example of dommes judging men guilty until proven innocent can be deemed as misandry, it means it’s everywhere on this site.
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