RE: pro submissives

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Lynnxz -> RE: pro submissives (9/5/2008 8:47:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CruelDesires What happens if a "pro" has a connection with someone they are playing with? Can that lead to complications? C-D I quit charging him and started dating him. :P Seriously. Mist, as for the 'Well I do submission this way, MY submission is not a hat' If you haven't noticed, which I really don't think you have, Pink and I both have lifestyle relationships outside of our jobs. It's not that hard to imagine that someone can handle both levels. Even if you don't like it, and it goes against your 'very principles' that doesn't mean its any less real. And I roll my eyes at anyone who says lifestylers are all honest, straightforward people.

mistoferin -> RE: pro submissives (9/5/2008 9:39:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lynnxz Mist, as for the 'Well I do submission this way, MY submission is not a hat' If you haven't noticed, which I really don't think you have, Pink and I both have lifestyle relationships outside of our jobs. It's not that hard to imagine that someone can handle both levels. I've noticed, I just don't understand how you can possibly call both by the same name. quote: Even if you don't like it, and it goes against your 'very principles' that doesn't mean its any less real. Can you please point out to me where I said it wasn't real or are you just making this shit up as you go along? I'm trying to make this really simple for you because you don't seem to be getting it. A thread was posted that asked what other's thoughts were on a subject. I answered that question as requested with my thoughts. For some reason you seem to be having an issue that I have a different code for the way I live my life than you. I don't have the same issue as I have said several times already that if this is what turns your crank...go for it. I simply don't see it in the same light as you. So go rock on with your bad self....and I will continue on my own merry way...no skin off my nose and it shouldn't be any off yours. quote: And I roll my eyes at anyone who says lifestylers are all honest, straightforward people. Again, where did I say this? As a matter of fact I've met some of the most vile, dishonest people IN this lifestyle. But just because they are there doesn't mean that I should adopt a "if you can't beat em, join them" attitude. It doesn't mean that I have to associate myself with them or participate in their dishonesty. While you may think it's ok for a person to cheat on their partner, and I don't know if that is how you feel or not, I don't feel it's ok. While you may agree to participate in their deceit, and I don't know if you do or not, I will not participate. Consent of all involved parties. It's not "my very principle", it's one of the very principles that this lifestyle was founded on. So roll your eyes. I promise I won't come knocking on your door and try to cram my views down your throat and get you to live your life my way. But if someone asks for my opinion or thoughts on a message board, chances are pretty good I'll answer them. And I will answer with MY thoughts and opinions.

xxxxpinkxxxx -> RE: pro submissives (9/5/2008 11:56:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mistoferin quote: ORIGINAL: Lynnxz Mist, as for the 'Well I do submission this way, MY submission is not a hat' If you haven't noticed, which I really don't think you have, Pink and I both have lifestyle relationships outside of our jobs. It's not that hard to imagine that someone can handle both levels. I've noticed, I just don't understand how you can possibly call both by the same name. quote: Even if you don't like it, and it goes against your 'very principles' that doesn't mean its any less real. Can you please point out to me where I said it wasn't real or are you just making this shit up as you go along? I'm trying to make this really simple for you because you don't seem to be getting it. A thread was posted that asked what other's thoughts were on a subject. I answered that question as requested with my thoughts. For some reason you seem to be having an issue that I have a different code for the way I live my life than you. I don't have the same issue as I have said several times already that if this is what turns your crank...go for it. I simply don't see it in the same light as you. So go rock on with your bad self....and I will continue on my own merry way...no skin off my nose and it shouldn't be any off yours. quote: And I roll my eyes at anyone who says lifestylers are all honest, straightforward people. Again, where did I say this? As a matter of fact I've met some of the most vile, dishonest people IN this lifestyle. But just because they are there doesn't mean that I should adopt a "if you can't beat em, join them" attitude. It doesn't mean that I have to associate myself with them or participate in their dishonesty. While you may think it's ok for a person to cheat on their partner, and I don't know if that is how you feel or not, I don't feel it's ok. While you may agree to participate in their deceit, and I don't know if you do or not, I will not participate. Consent of all involved parties. It's not "my very principle", it's one of the very principles that this lifestyle was founded on. So roll your eyes. I promise I won't come knocking on your door and try to cram my views down your throat and get you to live your life my way. But if someone asks for my opinion or thoughts on a message board, chances are pretty good I'll answer them. And I will answer with MY thoughts and opinions. while i feel your passion about your subbmission to your Dom/me is without doubt true and sincere you seem to think that a pro sub is beaten,and thats all we are here for,i really need to reiterate to you that it is not!!! sunbission is on many levels and you are obviously passionate about YOUR submission,however please dont judge others by your standars..its so unique to the individual..i think my friend may be a little frustrated with you as your views are not flexible in that you believe all submissives should submit the way you do!!! i am not about to try and change your mind,but ........ one day your unflexible views may just bite you on the ass... your Master /Mistress may give you all you need and feed your values...this may not happen next time!! you may be in for a shock!!

mistoferin -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 5:01:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: xxxxpinkxxxx you seem to think that a pro sub is beaten,and thats all we are here for,i really need to reiterate to you that it is not!!! That;s what I think? Thanks for telling me what I think. (It really isn't what I think but thanks for trying) quote: i think my friend may be a little frustrated with you as your views are not flexible in that you believe all submissives should submit the way you do!!! Omg, can you PLEASE show me somewhere that I said that....or even suggested that? You asked me what submission was to ME...and I told you. I never said you or anyone else should do anything. quote: one day your unflexible views may just bite you on the ass... your Master /Mistress may give you all you need and feed your values...this may not happen next time!! you may be in for a shock!! I'm a big girl...I think I'll live if it happens. But actually one of the things that attracted him the most is the fact that I have strong values. That when I apply a value or principle to my life he can count on me actually living by it.

cumUsethsbitch -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 9:59:54 AM)
so since you said you have a real time dom, i am assuming this is a job he wished you to attain, and he keeps the profits correct? like many here i do not understand why anyone would pay for either side, meaning a dom or a sub--whether you have sex or not is obviously sexual, and unless someone would also pay for a prostitute then it would seem of course they would not pay for a "pro-sub" since there are no strings attatched scene partners, friends, and the like to engage in such behavior with for zero dollars. this is my opinion and no doubt there are as many opinions as people as in any area of life, but i agree with other who have posted that this is indeed a way to attract attention to the 'pro-sub's profile. of course i have saw many strange things here on this site so is not a shocker or anything. good luck with it all hope ya make get lots of clients. Oh....and the comment that you were the only sub at the dungeon where you work, and saying you are a rare breed, is one of the funniest things ive read today so thanks for the laugh. of course i say this not to be cruel in any way, but you asked for opinions so there ya go.

Briena -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 10:05:50 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mistoferin quote: ORIGINAL: Lynnxz Mist, as for the 'Well I do submission this way, MY submission is not a hat' If you haven't noticed, which I really don't think you have, Pink and I both have lifestyle relationships outside of our jobs. It's not that hard to imagine that someone can handle both levels. I've noticed, I just don't understand how you can possibly call both by the same name. So when you are no longer in a relationship with a Dom are you no longer submissive? Do you stop being who you are? Is a woman who says she is submissive lying if shes not in a relationship? What you discribed as YOUR submission is what you get when you are in a commited relationship. What about people who play in dungeons or parties? What about people who are just dating others? Playing the field, as some might call it. Are they not submissive because they are not in a relationship with the Dom/me who is playing with them? It is all the same thing, in a relationship or not. Just because they charge for a service that doesnt make them any less submissive. That is why its called the same thing. They are submitting to the will of the other person, doing their bidding. You incorporate your relationship into submission, but think of theirs as a play time. Something that would be done at a public BDSM venue, but for a fee. You have love with your Dom, and thats awesome, but they just have fun. You said " Submission is my half of a relationship....a commitment....one that is built on time and trust developed. One that can't be bought, borrowed or rented. It comes from my heart and soul....from my very core. It is a connection and a bond. It is inspired by and reserved for one and not for just anyone who wants it. It is dedicated and devoted." So than if that is how you feel did you not have any type of BDSM sessions with your Dom before you got so commited? Did you never have any type of session outside of a serious relationship? Like I said, what you are discribing here is a romantic relationship, vanilla relationships are built on the same thing. You said its not just for anyone who wants it. Well neither is theirs. They choose their clients, and they want to do what they do. What about if THEY want it? I mean if you have never had a session outside of a serious relationship, EVER, than I can understand this... BUT, if you have had a play session, either at a dungeon, party, or just on your own with whomever while dating them, or even not dating them, than this is a moot point. One can be submissive outside of a full on serious relationship. Relationships are built on commitment, time, and trust. A relationship is a connection or a bond that you feel with someone special. In your way of thinking, so it seems (not trying to tell you how you think, just how it appears), if you are not in this committed type of relationship you should not play at all. Submission is a frame of mind, you either are, or you arent. Its not a switch that can be turned on or off. If they get paid because they submit to a Dom, of whom they are not in a relationship with, it is still submission. That is how it can be called the same thing. Submission by any other name is still submission.

Briena -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 10:19:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cumUsethsbitch so since you said you have a real time dom, i am assuming this is a job he wished you to attain, and he keeps the profits correct? like many here i do not understand why anyone would pay for either side, meaning a dom or a sub--whether you have sex or not is obviously sexual, and unless someone would also pay for a prostitute then it would seem of course they would not pay for a "pro-sub" since there are no strings attatched scene partners, friends, and the like to engage in such behavior with for zero dollars. this is my opinion and no doubt there are as many opinions as people as in any area of life, but i agree with other who have posted that this is indeed a way to attract attention to the 'pro-sub's profile. of course i have saw many strange things here on this site so is not a shocker or anything. good luck with it all hope ya make get lots of clients. Oh....and the comment that you were the only sub at the dungeon where you work, and saying you are a rare breed, is one of the funniest things ive read today so thanks for the laugh. of course i say this not to be cruel in any way, but you asked for opinions so there ya go. If you have to say that after you insult someone, you obviously meant it in a cruel way. You even changed the font size, and color of the word as if to add a little bit more sting to your insult. Own up to your statements. As for the rest of your post. You must have missed where they were talking about how they use it as a teaching tool. How they like to get new Doms and help them learn and grow. Paying for a prostitute is completly different, unless you have sex with your clients, than you are a prostitute. These girls do not, as they have already stated. BDSM is not all about sex, submission is not sexual 24/7. Not everyone has "friends" to play with for "zero dollars". I know I dont. I dont have random play friends that I can go do whatever with for free. You assume a lot of others, knowing nothing of their situations. Did you ever think that a Dom gets a pro so that he can train with a well expierenced sub? Or to show a new sub different things? Ive seen that done before too. Bringing a sub along to show them the ropes. I have also seen a Dom get his sub a pro to teach her how to be a Domme, to show her technique. Your assumption that all pros are like prostitutes is completly off base. Why would the profits go straight to the Dom? Its a job, not a pimping service! Does your paycheck go to your Dom? How do you know that they were not pros before they met their Doms? How do you know that they did not meet their Doms while doing this? You assume WAAAAY too much. Instead of assuming, and making yourself look bad, why not ASK THEM QUESTIONS. Or are you to busy making snide remarks and being disrespectful? I forgot... Pro subs are a rare breed. They are few and far between. You come across a ton of Pro Dommes, but rarely ever come across a pro sub. So laugh all you want, go check it out for yourself. Go see how hard it is to find an actual pro sub.

cumUsethsbitch -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 10:35:07 AM)
well im not gonna go back and forth with rude people on a post but will again say is MY OPINION....maybe you dont know what opinion means, but oh well MY opinion and of course it is sexual-which is not same as saying there is sex involved. maybe look up the difference

Briena -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 10:46:29 AM)
No, submission is not about sex. The SEXUAL use of submission is one aspect of it, not the entire thing. I like how you called me rude, but youre the one making insulting comments about another persons lifestyle choices. You can make your point without being a hater. sex·u·al [image]http://cache.lexico.com/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.png[/image] –adjective 1.of, pertaining to, or for sex: sexual matters; sexual aids. 2.occurring between or involving the sexes: sexual relations. 3.having sexual organs or reproducing by processes involving both sexes. Huh... Sexual is something used when SEX is involved. I looked it up for you. Maybe next time YOU should look up the difference before making dumb comments. [;)]

Sunnyfey -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 10:59:30 AM)
how dose one go about being a pro sub?

Briena -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 11:47:33 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey how dose one go about being a pro sub? Advertisements. Build up a local clientel. Attend group functions such as Munches, and parties. Meet people, put yourself out there. You are selling YOUR services, so you need to put YOU out there. Be presentable, and be professional. Try finding people new to the lifestyle, and offer your services as a form of training and guidence. Just like any other sales person, be friendly, cooperative, and respectable. Make people WANT to hire you, they are doing you the favor, not the other way around. Remember that.

Sunnyfey -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 11:50:02 AM)
interesting. Almost makes one wonder if she could get a group of like minded girlfriends together and start a sort of " newbie dom bootcamp" interesting interesting.....

Briena -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 11:52:50 AM)
That would actually be a great thing. There are so many new people to the lifestyle that have no idea what to do. A lot of the newer people dont really know about group functions and parties, and even when they do, a lot of the times they dont know anyone to attend them with. It can be frightening attending things like that alone for the first time. A bootcamp type situation where one pays for classes for X amount of weeks or whatever would not only make for great profit but also make for a great Dom/sub... Good idea :D Good luck with it!

Sunnyfey -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 11:59:31 AM)
hey thanks! I'll get the TNG group started on it....fun times

azropedntied -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 3:11:47 PM)
SunnyFey , the local TnG groups should all get together and combine ideas and strengths , ideas , and perhaps have a couple TnG national or world events . When i did it for a period of time it was to fill a need , not only my needs and journey , but the people i was working with and for .They just came out and asked me , we sat down and spoke .I was already doing security and some transportation and other minor tasks , it just expanded from there .Then it somewhat snowballed and the journey took a different direction .In short it sought me rather than i found and sought it out .

IvyMorgan -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 3:50:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey how dose one go about being a pro sub? I got a memo from a couple on the other side asking about my being a service sub, two emails later we worked out that that wasn't me, two emails later, I was wondering down that night to meet them at the club they ran. (This is all one Thursday morning, btw). Two hours into meeting them, they're telling me about a role in their club, and an hour after that I started working for them. I was a pro-top (mostly), an instructor person (sometimes), a demo bunny (occasionally), a DM (often), a hostess (all the time) and someone people beat up on (rarely). I never called myself a pro-sub. I was someone who got paid for being kinky. Or, yanno, something. I think the most common title I used for me was "health and safety", which did sum it up, aside from the beating and being beaten parts. I've done film work, often by answering ads/calls for models. And been paid. I've also been a demo bunny outside of the club where I was employed, but that's pretty much always been voluntary. Then, I was asked to do it, and I said yes. Also, I'll be the first to stick my hand up and say "I hired a pro". He was a "pro-dom". I wanted to see what the fuss was about, had money, missed having sessions with people I didn't have to instruct, wanted something simple, wanted something the way I wanted it (not topping from the bottom per se), wanted to be hurt, really hurt, safely... lots of reasons. As regards to the money issue, I'm a bit conflicted. When I was being paid, I felt in control of the situation. (Possibly because of the set up, because I was in control, one word and the guy/girl/couple were thrown out and I still kept the money. I also wasn't always on the bottom, and was, pretty much always enjoying myself, even if the constant exposure to porn was just evil and wrong.) But, when I paid him... I still felt in control of the situation. I burst into hysterical laughter when he counted the money, cos, well, that just lacks class damnit. I guess it just depends on how you wanted to look at the situation, but yes, paying for it, for me, meant I was in control, and that put a dampner on my otherwise very very nice pro-dom experience. And, I've yet to meet a pro who didn't do anything sexual. In terms of an overtly sexual act. Ignoring the fact that for many, especially ime those who go to pros, WIITWD is inherently sexual. Wait, that is a (possible) lie... the pro I filmed with didn't do sexual acts, though we were making movies for people to wank over. Interpret that as you will.

MadRabbit -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 6:43:14 PM)
Man, I don't even like standing over someone with a flogger for free, much less paying someone so I can stand over them with a flogger! I never really got the whole issue with people capitalizing on their bodies. I capitalize on my intelligence all the time. There is nothing I love more than cooking a dinner for someone I have an intimate connection with and that free service has a very powerful emotional expression and value attached to it. Now all the other assholes in the world I charge money to cook for and that monetary value replaces the emotional one, but I have yet to have yet to have anyone take offense to that. But with that said, I am one of those people who feels they are "above" paying for any kind of professional sexual service, because when it comes to my sexuality, if there isn't intimacy and a connection there, I get bored really really quick.

Lynnxz -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 6:44:10 PM)
ORIGINAL: cumUsethsbitch so since you said you have a real time dom, i am assuming this is a job he wished you to attain, and he keeps the profits correct? No, I keep all my profits.Do not assume I am so helpless, as to need a pimp to help me in my business. I started my biz myself, I am my secretary, my records keeper, and my agent, and my boss. like many here i do not understand why anyone would pay for either side, meaning a dom or a sub No problem here, I understand how some wouldn't get anything out of it. --whether you have sex or not is obviously sexual, Of course it is leaning towards being sexual. I do not get up in boots and corsets to weld, I wear them because men are visual creatures, and they love a pretty woman. It is marketing, the same as the models in the teenie suit in the beer commercials. Sex sells dear, it's quite the marketing tool. and unless someone would also pay for a prostitute then it would seem of course they would not pay for a "pro-sub" since there are no strings attatched scene partners, friends, and the like to engage in such behavior with for zero dollars. You are actually quite wrong here. Many of the gentlemen- and women- I play with say they would never think of hiring a prostitute, it just doesn't float their boat at all. A pro sub is much different than an escort. this is my opinion and no doubt there are as many opinions as people as in any area of life, but i agree with other who have posted that this is indeed a way to attract attention to the 'pro-sub's profile. of course i have saw many strange things here on this site so is not a shocker or anything. good luck with it all hope ya make get lots of clients. Funny story here, CM is actually a very poor marketing tool for pro-anythings. I think I have perhaps met 3 clients from CM, in the months that I have been a pro sub. I get most of my clients from an actual advertising site. I was talking to the op on the other side, and she is genuinely interested in the opinions of people. Oh....and the comment that you were the only sub at the dungeon where you work, and saying you are a rare breed, is one of the funniest things ive read today so thanks for the laugh. of course i say this not to be cruel in any way, but you asked for opinions so there ya go. Don't lie cupcake. If 'I' am going to be mean, I own up to it. And actually- professional submissives are quite the rare breed. At the moment, I am the only independent girl in the state of Georgia, although there are a couple that work part time at the local dungeon I believe. well im not gonna go back and forth with rude people on a post but will again say is MY OPINION....maybe you dont know what opinion means, but oh well MY opinion and of course it is sexual-which is not same as saying there is sex involved. maybe look up the difference My gym teacher had a saying that went: "Every Defense needs a good Offense" Why am I defensive? Because a few in this thread are being offensive. Do not assume that I don't know what opinion means. Capslock and insults do not validate your posts. Your posts reek of troll, and ignorance. If you have something to say, I would suggest coming out on your main profile to say what you feel. I'm a big girl, I can handle it.

Lynnxz -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 6:50:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey how dose one go about being a pro sub? I'd suggest finding a pro domme in your area that you get along with, and asking if she'd like to do 'double sessions' with you. If she is anything like the girls I work with, she will be quite happy to- it's great for business. I started out by myself, and was honestly pee-pants terrified for my first session. [:D]

variation30 -> RE: pro submissives (9/6/2008 8:59:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CruelDesires Why pay money for services that One can get for free by just sending an email or picking up the phone? I never considered using a "pro" but have admired some "pro's" pictures over on the other side. Me being the perv that I am. [:D] C-D hm...I don't have that phone number or that email address. I feel like I'm missing out. quote: Even as attractive as some of the "pro's" are, I would never consider paying for it. I've spent money on things much more frivolous than that.

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