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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/7/2008 9:00:03 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		I do have to relate a story in regards to homophobia towards gay and bi women.
 
My last roommate started dating a girl when she was much younger and as a result, the entire girl's volleyball team jumped her and beat her pretty bad. (My roommate is now in her mid 20's as a reference point on the time frame.)
 
Cut to several years later when she was working in a shop here downtown.  She was checking out an attractive woman on the street and some of her co-workers noticed this.  Afterwards they grouped together to shun her and make her time at work absolutely miserable.  And not because she had actually said or done anything towards any of them.
 
She is a natural submissive type and I am a natural dominant personality type.  While she was living here most strangers and people in our social circle assumed we were involved as lovers.  That was not the case.  Not because we did not find each other attractive but because she is very much hard wired as monogamous and I am hard wired for polyamory.  She had a serious boyfriend and was very devoted to him.  The endless stares, comments, questions, speculation and gossip never ended though.  We just laughed and shrugged it off. 
 
A sample from a woman working the register at the drug store.
 
"Is this your daughter?"  "No"
"Your sister?" "No"
"Your niece or cousin?" "No"
"She is my friend!"

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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/7/2008 9:09:39 PM   
cloudboy


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Yes, I was going to say hard-wired sexual revulsion.

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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/7/2008 11:23:32 PM   
Hippiekinkster


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Racquelle

quote:

ORIGINAL: Evility   ....The only appropriate response is "I love all gay men".
  Why not love all them?  Why not love everyone?

Damn Hippie. We are Murkins. We  are supossed ta hate someone. Godd sez so. Utherwize we'd be Europeans.

I mean, lookit the real truu Murkins what post here. They all hate someone. They be real Mens. And Wimmenses.

You know who they is.

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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/8/2008 11:34:31 AM   
seeksfemslave


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Racquelle
Why not love everyone?
  Anyone who claims they love everyone is being economical with the actualite; and probably wants your vote as well.

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Profile   Post #: 104
RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/8/2008 7:01:51 PM   
Racquelle


Posts: 600
Joined: 4/21/2008
Status: offline 		I don't need anyone's vote  as I have too many skeletons to ever run for office.  BUT I always grew up with the mantra "Those Christians are stupid - you CAN'T love everyone."  But at some point I found my life controlled by anger, frustration, and outright hate for other human beings.  (Exactly the way my parents' lives are controlled - and they really ARE hippies.)  I got tired of feeling that way all the time.  It's like taking poison hoping the other guy will get sick.  So I made a rather concerted effort at "what if I tried to love everyone?"  People who irk me, repulse me, disagree with me, threaten me...people who threaten the well-being of the planet, and even homophobes.   It's not exactly like "loving" every one.  But it is like honestly and truly desiring well-being for everyone, and it has changed my attitudes and life in ways I can't really describe.  It hasn't ruined me as a dominant, or made me less sadistic.  It's just made me feel better.  Plus, I love a lot more people than I used to, and heck, loving someone is a great first step toward being able to tie them up and beat them.

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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/8/2008 7:30:07 PM   
stella41b


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quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper

It seems we accept all Women...from the most-popular supermodel to the the most Butched-Out Les, as Women. I am unaware of any girlfriend of mine who has ever expressed a fear of 'losing her womanhood' (though some have said they feared losing their 'feminity', and perhaps that's a parallel, but I don't think so.)



Including the transgendered females?

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Profile   Post #: 106
RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/8/2008 7:46:00 PM   
Satyr6406


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From: New Brunswick, N.J.
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

However, there's a big difference between homophobia and simply disliking homosexual sex.  And there is such a thing as homophobia in this world, even if we don't like the particular word that has been chosen to denote it.  Homophobia is an irrational disgust of homosexuals--the kind of hatred that drives people to violence against homosexuals.  If you dislike homosexual sex but don't hate homosexuals for it, you're not a homophobe.



LaM;

    I have always enjoyed your posts and I agree with the above sentiment b(ut) why is it that if I don't LIKE homosexual behavior, I am I automatically LABELED a "homophobe"? It's a sweeping generalization and IT'S WRONG! It's as wrong as my being called a "racist" because I appear to be white. They are two bastard children of the same evil father.
 
     My point was (other than the whole "need" we seem to have to label people): A better term should be found and used and the fact that this one is used makes me think there's a purpose for it.
 
      I have NEVER beaten someone up for being gay. I don't hate homosexuals. In fact; I try not to hate anyone. So, why am I labeled with such a derisive term? Accident? I freakin' doubt it!

< Message edited by Satyr6406 -- 9/8/2008 8:21:54 PM >

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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/8/2008 7:46:17 PM   
candystripper


Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline 		Well, stella, that's an interesting question.  My guess is, the answer is yes.  I think society tends to look at Women as somehoww lesser than Men, and therefore, anyone who 'elects' to move 'down' the food chain would be treated as a Woman.
 
But yet I have seen many, many instances of CD's and the like being treated with even more disgust and even aggression that gay Men...so I don't really know. I think I'd be careful, always.  Not the best answer, but it's not the best world.
 
candystripper  

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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/9/2008 11:18:33 AM   
philosophy


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Joined: 2/15/2004
Status: offline 		FR

..on the whole, society prepares males differently to females. Theres a certain amount of biological inevitability in this, but that's not the whole story. Men tend to enjoy playing games with attendent rules more than woman. Compare gender differentials in areans such as online gaming or physical team games. Expressed as a percentage of population men tend to do these things more.
So, why? That's a thesis waiting to happen. What i would like to offer for peoples consideration is that given this apparent preference for rule based thinking, when a male member who is part of a 90% majority meets someone from the other 10% there can be a mismatch of rules, especially social rules. The representative of the 90% can be flummoxed in ways they can't explain. For a small percentage of these people it can become homophobia.

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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/9/2008 12:04:05 PM   
Vendaval


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Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		So when are you going to be starting that thesis? 

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/9/2008 1:12:59 PM   
philosophy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Vendaval

So when are you going to be starting that thesis? 


...no current plans......lol

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Profile   Post #: 111
RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/9/2008 7:27:32 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		IMO, there is a big difference between being uncomfortable around certain types of behavior and being actively rude, insulting or physically agressive against an entire group of people for their sexual orientation.
 
I have seen and experienced both.  Uncomfortable and trying to be accomodating is much easier to deal with in a social setting compared to fag bashing.

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/9/2008 7:39:25 PM   
VivaciousSub


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From: Tampa, FL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lazarus1983

Hell, I'm a 100% straight male, raised by a lesbian mother, and so homosexuality was completely normal and commonplace, and I'd still rather not be around two guys in a hot and heavy make out session.


I'm bi, and I don't care what the orientation is, I don't want to see two people playing tonsil hockey unless I specifically involved myself in the situation. Keep that shit private unless you're in a setting that allows for otherwise!


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RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/9/2008 8:17:30 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		I agree about the excessive displays of public affection by anyone unless they are in a club or party, etc.

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

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Profile   Post #: 114
RE: What Causes Homophobia? - 9/10/2008 10:55:49 AM   
philosophy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Vendaval

IMO, there is a big difference between being uncomfortable around certain types of behavior and being actively rude, insulting or physically agressive against an entire group of people for their sexual orientation.
 


...i agree, but i think they're both ends of a continuum.......

(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 115
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