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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:21:49 PM   
NihilusZero


Posts: 4036
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From: Nashville, TN
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quote:

ORIGINAL: VeryMercurial

I can totally understand why many people that read the message boards never post.

I know of a specific one in particular who has voiced that concern to me. Pity considering the brain she has.


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I know they're all insane
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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:24:09 PM   
ModeratorSixteen


Posts: 1275
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

quote:

ORIGINAL: ModeratorSixteen
quote:

Our opinion doesn't matter because thread necromancy is a no no here. The mods will send you a warning.

Resurrecting old threads will not always gain a mod letter.

I will miss your fanmail then.


Not always doesn't mean never.No worries,we still have time for our favorites :)

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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:25:40 PM   
EbonyWood


Posts: 2044
Joined: 7/8/2005
Status: offline 		The originator of this thread put up the old Ghana rant. We all know it.
 
The first few pages were full of regs helping him out.
 
There were some jokes in there.
 
Some regs make snarky comments on newbies.
 
For every 1 of these there are 5 stupid newbie comments.
 
I am often one of the snarkers. (ask the Hall Monitor)
 
I was once a newbie and the next day I wasn't. There was no 'wall' for me because I have balls as big as any reg can find in his or her pants.
 
Natural selection is a great theory.
 
Im not trying to be a witty reg but this isn't very kinky. Everyone go and do something sexual at least.

(in reply to VeryMercurial)
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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:26:42 PM   
NihilusZero


Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

You know, that's true. And I made a point this morning of responding a new comer's first post that had been ignored for a few pages. I'm not saying that we couldn't be better at this.

I'm not over there often, but I see Holly over in the Newbies forum waving her funny/silly welcome emoticon at all kinds of new people. It's rather sweet.

I'm not sure how a transition from that kind of friendly welcome can work to over here. And it isn't because of the content of those initial threads there. I've seen some awful introduction threads there and she's just as welcoming to them...stark difference to what they might expect here.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

but for the most part, I was ignored by many regulars.

Clearly a byproduct of having chosen the wrong avatar.



_____________________________

"I know it's all a game
I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
~Siouxsie & the Banshees

NihilusZero.com

CM Sex God du Jour
CM Hall Monitor

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 664
RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:28:58 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EbonyWood

The originator of this thread put up the old Ghana rant. We all know it.
 
The first few pages were full of regs helping him out.
 
There were some jokes in there.
 
Some regs make snarky comments on newbies.
 
For every 1 of these there are 5 stupid newbie comments.
 
I am often one of the snarkers. (ask the Hall Monitor)
 
I was once a newbie and the next day I wasn't. There was no 'wall' for me because I have balls as big as any reg can find in his or her pants.
 
Natural selection is a great theory.
 
Im not trying to be a witty reg but this isn't very kinky. Everyone go and do something sexual at least.


Wow, someone who actually "gets" the process. Kudos.

Someone will call you mean soon...wait for it. :)

(in reply to EbonyWood)
Profile   Post #: 665
RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:29:37 PM   
DomMeinCT


Posts: 2355
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

quote:

Part of the argument here is that certain folks feel cut out of the boards.

You know, that's true. And I made a point this morning of responding a new comer's first post that had been ignored for a few pages. I'm not saying that we couldn't be better at this.

The thing is, and I deal with this in my work daily working with organizations, is that as much as we need to develop a welcoming culture, individuals who enter the culture need to adapt to what is in place. When I came back here after 4 years absence, many of my initial posts were ignored. I few older posters recognized me but for the most part, I was ignored by many regulars. I just kept posting my opinions until people took notice. I also had to adapt as the boards were not AT ALL the way they were back when I used to post. But I adapted and today, I am enjoying a lively debate with people.

quote:

(And thank you for the link to your thread.)

My pleasure!

- LA


I'm not sure I agree with you that we need to develop a welcoming culture.  The board could be better at this, but it isn't.  This board was a lot tougher than others I'd known previously, but it also brought a lot of opportunities for learning, within the constraints of the board's style*.

As to your experience coming back here, I think your second paragraph is the answer as well.  That is, you stuck with it and adapted.   In my opinion, short of more moderation, the only behaviors you can change on an open forum are your own.


*Such as being less tolerant of OPs with repetitive topics.

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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:31:46 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ModeratorSixteen

quote:

ORIGINAL: Level
This brings up a question: I've seen, in the past, Mods criticize posters for bumping old threads; is there anything in the TOS about this?


There have been instances in the past where people bump their own old threads to get to the top of the forum again, using that word or openly suggesting that they are doing this exact thing.That is the only time you might find moderators unbumping.

quote:

Our opinion doesn't matter because thread necromancy is a no no here. The mods will send you a warning.

Resurrecting old threads will not always gain a mod letter.


Thanks for the clarification!

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to ModeratorSixteen)
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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:34:14 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: EbonyWood
...because I have balls as big as any reg can find in his or her pants.
...this isn't very kinky. Everyone go and do something sexual at least.

Why do I have the urge for a cock and ball torture session now? ;-)

- LA

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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:34:33 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

You know, that's true. And I made a point this morning of responding a new comer's first post that had been ignored for a few pages. I'm not saying that we couldn't be better at this.

I'm not over there often, but I see Holly over in the Newbies forum waving her funny/silly welcome emoticon at all kinds of new people. It's rather sweet.


I think that's her being punished by Jim, due to faulty meatloaf.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 669
RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:42:40 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

You know, that's true. And I made a point this morning of responding a new comer's first post that had been ignored for a few pages. I'm not saying that we couldn't be better at this.

I'm not over there often, but I see Holly over in the Newbies forum waving her funny/silly welcome emoticon at all kinds of new people. It's rather sweet.


Well I was talking about a regular post, but yes, the new comer's forum is a good place. DarkSteven is often there too. He is a really helpful and welcoming person and very appreciated.

quote:

I'm not sure how a transition from that kind of friendly welcome can work to over here. And it isn't because of the content of those initial threads there. I've seen some awful introduction threads there and she's just as welcoming to them...stark difference to what they might expect here.


People have various social skills. I tend to enter a group 2 ways: parachuted in as the leader in which case I have to earn people's respect and loyalty, not always easy or, I inch my way in building alliances and slowly get noticed. I'm pretty good at it but I've honed this skill all my life. It isn't something that comes natural to me though.

quote:

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

but for the most part, I was ignored by many regulars.

Clearly a byproduct of having chosen the wrong avatar.

Clearly! ;-) Though my first Namio avatar had me popular with the sub boys... so were the 2 Sardax. This one seems more popular with the Doms ;-)

- LA

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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 12:49:35 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Level
quote:

ORIGINAL: ModeratorSixteen
...

Thanks for the clarification!

I was pretty surprised at that info.

There have been a few very worthy threads, with excellent authors answering commonly reoccurring questions (like this OP) that I would love to necro. I haven’t because I presumed we always got warnings when we necro.

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I give good thread.

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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 1:15:38 PM   
Lucienne


Posts: 1175
Joined: 9/5/2009
Status: offline 		FR

I think part of the reason people hate thread resurrection is because they're irritated and embarrassed when they take the time to read the OP and respond thoughtfully, only to discover the question is 4 years old. I try to make a point to note the date on the OP and if it's really old, I'll usually skip to the last page for the entertainment value of the recent responses.

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 672
RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 1:23:03 PM   
CaringandReal


Posts: 1397
Joined: 2/15/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SacreBleu

Maybe. But its only a 4 month old thread! Its not like it was dredged up from 8 years ago and it a topic that had no interest. Obviously since it went to 29 pages it was something that at least SOME people thought of interest.

I just dont get the hostility or the cutting attitude toward so many of the new posters here.


I think it started slow. A few posters practiced it heavily several years ago. There weren't that many but they irritated me so much I refused to post, although I've been on this site longer than most of them. Then more and more posters copied their style. Now I see brand new posters, within a week or month of posting, take up the cruddy attack/bitch attitude. Perhaps it's so they can be accepted by the other bitches (male and female)?

Some forums love to use the same threads over and over. Literotica is an example of this. In their kink forums you'll see 5-10 year old threads, constantly and lovingly revived and nobody thinks it's a bad thing. In fact if you start a new thread on the same topic of a hoary old thread that is well-read, you might get asked to post in the older thread. That is the exact opposite from this place.

By the way, I agree with you about the looose-loose situation: "Go read the old threads! Don't start a new thread! But don't you DARE post in an older thread!" You can't win... if you listen to the bitches. The trick is, I think, not to listen to them. The hide button under a poster's avatar/name is my best friend these days. :D

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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 1:35:54 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

There have been a few very worthy threads, with excellent authors answering commonly reoccurring questions (like this OP) that I would love to necro.

Please do!  I was excited when I saw you started posting again.  I hope you frikkin go for it.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 674
RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 1:47:14 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CaringandReal
By the way, I agree with you about the looose-loose situation: "Go read the old threads! Don't start a new thread! But don't you DARE post in an older thread!" You can't win...



Actually, nope, haven't seen that personally.  I see people told that if you post in an old thread, have a reason to do so, and state the reason.  Don't grab the paddles and shock it to life just to say "I totally agree" (which is somewhere in the guidelines at the top of one of the sections).  Does anyone get slammed for saying, "I've read about ten threads on this, but I'm having a hard time wrapping my brain around it, so I'd like to ask this...", or "I know this thread is old, but the topic came up recently in conversation, so I'd like to ask if... "?  I haven't seen anyone get slammed for that.

The person who resurrected it this time (and it wasn't 4 months old, it was a year and a half old that had first gotten resurrected for that "i totally agree" thing) actually had a slightly different question.  If she had worded it a bit differently, it might have been noticed more.  I think one person saw it.

Her question was about someone not responding after trading a series of emails while the original post was about someone not responding to an initial email.

And in that light, my response is I'm guilty of not responding to someone after a series of emails.  It's not deliberate, it's usually that I've lost interest in them and quite frankly, just forgot all about them.  Is that impolite?  Well, if forgetting all about someone is impolite, then I'm impolite.

Cali



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(in reply to CaringandReal)
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RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 2:04:08 PM   
Drifa


Posts: 547
Joined: 7/27/2007
From: Rural Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterChip2008
A sub/slave's 'duty' is first and foremost 'to serve', this includes, but is definitely not limited to, responding when a Master/Mistress say's something to them...even if the response is in the 'negative'.


You are so excruciatingly wrong. Is there an intensifier for "wrongest"?  As I am sure a zillion other people answered in this thread, I am not YOUR submissive or slave. I have no obligations or duties to you or to anyone other than MY dominant.

Just as it is my privilege to not open the door when I see a Jehovah's Witness standing on the doormat, just as it's my privilege to delete spam unread, it's my right and privilege to not only not reply to men who write to me, but to delete your post unread if I want. Heck, you can set up your mail options so that ALL mail from guys goes into the bulk bin.

If people are not responding to you, you are either writing the wrong people (i.e., read their profile and if you are not what they are seeking don't bother to write!) or you are writing the wrong thing (i.e., your communication skills are not adequate to intrigue someone into writing you back). Or the person you wrote to looked at your pic or profile and just wasn't in to you at all and deleted it.






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Profile   Post #: 676
RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 2:05:36 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		So what is the protocol for replies in a necro?
We ignore the 4 year old OP and reply to the necromancer’s reply?
http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=3039029

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 677
RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 2:13:23 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline 		RS, that sounds reasonable; especially if the OP is long gone, talking to them would make me feel like a doofus.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 678
RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 2:13:55 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
So what is the protocol for replies in a necro?

I'm not aware of anything formal.  It seems to me, though, that as long as a post is constructive and useful, it can't be "wrong."


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 679
RE: WHY NO POLITE RESPONSES??? - 1/31/2010 2:35:39 PM   
mstrj69


Posts: 295
Joined: 5/27/2004
Status: offline 		Answerring an email is just polite and good manners. If it is going to your bulk mail then why not state what will get the sender sent to the bulk mail. I read every profile thoroughly before writing. If they say anything that makes me believe they do not want to hear from me or are taken, I will not write them.

Maybe that is the OP's problem, he is old enough to remember good manners and expect them when it appears they have gone out of style. I have had some nice replies and if they say they are not interested, I will not write them back. Or if they really wanted to, they could just block me when replying. That cuts down on inflamatory responses to their response.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 680
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