RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you?

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RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 3:13:05 PM

masterofdrkness2

Posts: 1697
Joined: 3/17/2008
Status: offline

collar, own and taken all have the same meaning to me ...I am not one who just randomly collars anyone.. took me 3 years to collar wenchy ,to me it is the same as being married . some thing I wont be rushed into , it is a lasting commitment from me . as LadyPact said ... they have become family ..... to the op I have seen some get collared in under 3 hours lol

_____________________________

So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell,
Blue skys from pain.
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
(Pink Flyod)

(in reply to PanthersMom)

Post #: 21

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 3:20:10 PM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

I'm in accord with Webster on all those meanings.

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I give good thread.

(in reply to IrishMist)

Post #: 22

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 3:40:08 PM

natasha66

Posts: 321
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: NJ
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

To be owned and collared means we have made a commitment to each other, we're in a relationship together, we're devoted to each other because we've taken the time to know each other and have taken the next step.

It's not something I rush into, it's not something I take lightly. It means that I am now officially HIS.

I wholeheartedly agree with this. Unfortunately my brain isn't functioning at full enough capacity at the moment to put my feelings into words. You said it much better than I could have.

_____________________________

"If you bother me again I shall visit you in the small hours of the night and put a bat up your nightdress".
~Basil Fawlty

Collared June 4th, 2008
Love is giving him the power to destroy you, but trusting him not to.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 23

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 4:07:19 PM

Padriag

Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline

What do they mean... to many these days, apparently not very much. I must confess, they don't mean nearly as much nor the same as they once did to me. I tend to view owner ship today... of anything... as that which I can keep, hold onto, claim, etc. through my own means. If it can be taken away from me, it was never really mine.

For example... do I own my home... no, the bank does and if I missed some mortgage payments they'd probably remind me of that. When I pay the mortgage off then I can really say I own it.
Do I own my own businesses... for now, but only so long as I'm clever enough and hard working enough to maintain that... it isn't permanent.
Do other's own "slaves"... I dunno... if they can be taken away from you, seduced by someone else, etc... then I would say that ownership was very much an illusion. If on the otherhand they remain with you regardless of circumstance or enticements... you might make a good argument that you own them.

For me ownership comes down to what you can actively possess and hold on to. Anyone can claim to own something. Many can take things. But far fewer can claim or take something and hold on to it... those are the ones who "own."

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to CelticPrince)

Post #: 24

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 4:11:07 PM

Roselaure

Posts: 672
Joined: 4/12/2008
Status: offline

Titles are essentially just that, and meaningless except as understood by the people in the relationship. My personal definitions are:

"Taken", is seeing someone seriously, more than a play partner, but less than complete committment.

"Owned" is a deepening of that relationship. Committed as understood by the parties in the relationship.

"Collared" to me is the same as "Owned" except it includes jewelry.

_____________________________

Once conform, once do what other people do because they do it, and lethargy steals over all the finer nerves and faculties of the soul.
-Virginia Woolf

(in reply to CelticPrince)

Post #: 25

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 6:12:58 PM

CelticPrince

Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

To be owned and collared means we have made a commitment to each other, we're in a relationship together, we're devoted to each other because we've taken the time to know each other and have taken the next step.

It's not something I rush into, it's not something I take lightly. It means that I am now officially HIS.

littlewonder,

But you left out "taken"?????

CP

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 26

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 6:47:55 PM

patina

Posts: 493
Joined: 9/14/2006
From: no
Status: offline

Greetings:

Recently i posted i was owned then within a week to 2 week period i had left him. I actually felt pressured into stating i was own. i just find myself agreeing against my better judgement to posting such statements. I think i may have finally learned though to say to a Dom, no i will not do as you say you do not own me. Anyway i a really do value and hold the idea of being owned/collared as a serious action in my life.

Unfortunatly i seem to have gotten the majority of fakes and players as they all say oh but i know we are made for each other and you must do as i say now. I am finally learning these are the fakes to tell them to go fly a kite. I have been a silly gal to trust so quick.

patina

_____________________________

a diamond in the rough

(in reply to Roselaure)

Post #: 27

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 7:29:35 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

To be owned and collared means we have made a commitment to each other, we're in a relationship together, we're devoted to each other because we've taken the time to know each other and have taken the next step.

It's not something I rush into, it's not something I take lightly. It means that I am now officially HIS.

littlewonder,

But you left out "taken"?????

CP

When I say I'm "taken" then it simply means I'm currently seeing/dating someone.

(in reply to CelticPrince)

Post #: 28

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 7:48:22 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Owned, collared, property.... To Me, these are family. A place that can not be taken from My boy. That he is Mine fills My heart with love and pride. That this is My boy. My sub. That the trinket I place on his neck compares little to what he has in My heart.

Then again, I'm sentimental. Not everyone feels this way.

LP, so I assume the terms are all inclusive for you!

CP

The three I used are, but I don't see them on the same level as taken.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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(in reply to CelticPrince)

Post #: 29

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 7:57:18 PM

DavanKael

Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline

For me, ideally, it means the same thing a wedding band would connote to most.
For me, at least, it means valued, cherished, not optional.
Davan

(in reply to IrishMist)

Post #: 30

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/18/2008 8:04:18 PM

daddysliloneds

Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline

titles mean nothing to me; it's the way the relationship actually operates that does, and only if it's my relationship.

(in reply to CelticPrince)

Post #: 31

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/19/2008 5:57:58 AM

sravaka

Posts: 314
Joined: 6/20/2008
Status: offline

I think I'm in a minority here (nothing new)... to me "owned" means that everything I am, feel, think, do belongs to my partner for him to use, mold, enjoy, take care of, over a long if not permanent haul. I wouldn't think of myself as "owned" unless I had given absolute authority/control to my partner and he was in fact exercising that authority/control. Not something that can be accomplished in 3 days, though the intent to create such a relationship would likely be present well in advance of its being realized.

"Collared" to me represents the formal commitment to the relationship, and one might be collared in a relationship that didn't involve being owned, as I define it.... though for me personally it's inseparable from "owned" and yes, as serious as or more serious than a wedding ring. "Collared" is the relationship-vessel, and "owned" one particular kind of content.

"Taken" just means unavailable because of whatever kind of involvement, at whatever stage.

_____________________________

Miseries hold me fixed, and I would gladly cut these roots to become a floating plant. I would yield myself up utterly, if the inviting stream could be relied upon. --Ono no Komachi

(in reply to daddysliloneds)

Post #: 32

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/19/2008 6:39:33 AM

SultryMomma

Posts: 48
Joined: 7/11/2004
Status: offline

I have been reading all of the replies, trying to figure out the best wording for me to describe what those words mean to me, and to be honest, LadyPact hit it on the nail for me.

SM
(Kris)

(in reply to sravaka)

Post #: 33

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/19/2008 7:08:14 AM

catize

Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline

***fast reply***

taken: I had it, it was taken from me
owned: Ow! Ned, that hurt!
collared: The collar red is a safe word
(feeling punny today!)

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"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
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(in reply to SultryMomma)

Post #: 34

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/19/2008 7:11:15 AM

CelticPrince

Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OttersSwim

Total Noob Reply Here:

Through discussions with my Lady it has come to me that for most, a collar is a very serious thing - akin to a wedding ring in commitment and level of trust. While I would someday desire to receive Her collar, we are waayyy to early in our relationship for anything like that, and for this moment, I am her submissive and quite happy with that.

To me, Owned implies a M/s connotation and that's all I can say about that.

Otters,

Seems to me then that taken would suit your sitrep; correct?

CP

(in reply to OttersSwim)

Post #: 35

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/19/2008 7:12:02 AM

silkenfire

Posts: 130
Joined: 9/27/2007
Status: offline

Fast Reply

To me, I am taken. Taken means that I am not looking for a romantic or D/s relationship of any kind because I have my master and am content.

Owned is a step from where I am. Owned is when he will control every aspect of my life and I will be secure in myself enough to allow it to happen, to allow myself to be completely dependent on his decisions.

Collared to me is a touchy issue -- I feel that a collar means something, but I'm also a bit too sentimental. I see a collar as something that shows one is owned, and I believe that it is something important and not to be done lightly. I also see it as a gift of the D side to label the s side as theirs. I don't expect this to honestly happen to myself, and certainly don't feel worthy of it myself. Now, I know it means different things to different people, and I don't judge their views on the matter. But to me it is akin to, but different than marriage. Marriage for the M/s D/s side, but not for the legal, romantic, "real life" side. And something that comes with connotations in my mind that I may never be ready for. But that's me.

ETA: I do however see the use of "play collars" as a totally different and viable thing than the idea of "being collared" -- sort of like how I wear plenty of rings in real life but that doesn't mean I'm "engaged or married" like it *could* mean.

< Message edited by silkenfire -- 10/19/2008 7:13:20 AM >

(in reply to IrishMist)

Post #: 36

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/19/2008 7:14:58 AM

CelticPrince

Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CallaFirestormBW

"Taken" and "Collared" are flexible terms for us. I'll 'take' a bottom for play, or collar a servant to the House in a training or probationary/prospective collar without a lot of preparatory expectations.

When an individual is taken as a long-term servant and moves from a probationary to a full House collar, there will have been extensive preparatory time. Individuals who get to that point have been with us for six months to a year. We've talked about all the aspects of the potential relationship, and everyone is pretty clear what xhe can expect.

Beyond this, we have had bond-servants. This is a deep and abiding commitment to unlimited service to the Household. Boundaries are set aside, and whatever will best serve the needs of the Keepers and the House becomes the driving force for the servant. This kind of commitment is our equivalent to what some call a TPE or no-holds-barred servitude, and typically takes -years- to take shape. We -never- accept someone directly into bond-servitude. It is something that, for us, grows organically as understanding grows and trust develops between the participants.

Hope this is answering the questions,

Calla Firestorm

Calla,

Thanks for your thoughts, but what happened to "owned" Does it not exist in your house?

CP

(in reply to CallaFirestormBW)

Post #: 37

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/19/2008 7:18:33 AM

CelticPrince

Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: oceanwynds

On my profile, i believe i do not have owned or not owned. My heart is with Sir. I am not looking for a Domaniant here or anywhere. I have accepted what Sir can offer me and am willing to live with that, which is not to collar me. I will not beg for a collar, since that is not his way. If later on he chooses differently, then He will let me know. I cannot speak for other submissives or slaves. They have other wants and needs, and I honor that. I just happy to serve Sir.

oceanwynds

wynds,

Truely humble thoughts, so I will assume a "taken" status. Thanks for your input.

CP

(in reply to oceanwynds)

Post #: 38

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/19/2008 7:20:23 AM

CelticPrince

Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

A collar is a serious thing to me and has more to do with what is in our hearts than what is on the neck.

I see those who come here seeking and are quickly collared or taken and think... see you next week on the boards honey... wondering where master/mistress has gone or what to do about them. Or a quick change artist. Oh well... life is made up of many people and if they want the roller coaster... I will give them my ticket too... I don't need it.

Lockit,

Very well stated, thanks.

CP

(in reply to Lockit)

Post #: 39

RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? - 10/19/2008 8:16:01 AM

lizcgirl

Posts: 287
Joined: 4/13/2008
Status: offline

Taken was what I used in vanilla terms to say that I was with some one. It could be dating, engaged, whatever. Basically it meant I wasn't available.
Collared and owned to me are the same thing. I will not wear a collar if I am not owned by a person. If I did, it would trivialize something that means alot to me and I won't do that. I can't be owned by a person I don't care for and want to be with for a long time. A collar actually means more to me than an engagement ring so I refuse to jump from one to another to another. When I'm collared, I think of that person first, I behave as though they're with me at all times, I give all of me to them. I don't do that in every relationship so I choose to keep it seperate for my own peace of mind.

_____________________________

Never make some one a priority when all you are to them is an option.

(in reply to CelticPrince)

Post #: 40

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