Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (Full Version)

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CelticPrince -> Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 12:33:33 PM)

Here I go pondering again. Being constantly interested in the mix of our path walkers I, when time permits, review the stats on newcomers. both the "D"s and the "s"s for a general profile of who and why they have come to the path. Many time I come across an eyeopener of a supposed newcomer to the path and its concepts and bingo after 3 days on CM they are "owned"

So what do the titles mean to you and clearly it is a question for both sides of the slash.

CP




JustDarkness -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 12:37:11 PM)

I must love a girl or she must be a very very very good friend....before I even want her.
With out that ..I don't want to own




LadyPact -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 12:44:00 PM)

Owned, collared, property.... To Me, these are family.  A place that can not be taken from My boy.  That he is Mine fills My heart with love and pride.  That this is My boy.  My sub.  That the trinket I place on his neck compares little to what he has in My heart.

Then again, I'm sentimental.  Not everyone feels this way.




littlewonder -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 12:44:18 PM)

To be owned and collared means we have made a commitment to each other, we're in a relationship together, we're devoted to each other because we've taken the time to know each other and have taken the next step.

It's not something I rush into, it's not something I take lightly. It means that I am now officially HIS.




OttersSwim -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 12:47:26 PM)

Total Noob Reply Here:

Through discussions with my Lady it has come to me that for most, a collar is a very serious thing - akin to a wedding ring in commitment and level of trust.  While I would someday desire to receive Her collar, we are waayyy to early in our relationship for anything like that, and for this moment, I am her submissive and quite happy with that. 

To me, Owned implies a M/s connotation and that's all I can say about that.




CallaFirestormBW -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 12:49:54 PM)

"Taken" and "Collared" are flexible terms for us. I'll 'take' a bottom for play, or collar a servant to the House in a training or probationary/prospective collar without a lot of preparatory expectations.

When an individual is taken as a long-term servant and moves from a probationary to a full House collar, there will have been extensive preparatory time. Individuals who get to that point have been with us for six months to a year. We've talked about all the aspects of the potential relationship, and everyone is pretty clear what xhe can expect.

Beyond this, we have had bond-servants. This is a deep and abiding commitment to unlimited service to the Household. Boundaries are set aside, and whatever will best serve the needs of the Keepers and the House becomes the driving force for the servant. This kind of commitment is our equivalent to what some call a TPE or no-holds-barred servitude, and typically takes -years- to take shape. We -never- accept someone directly into bond-servitude. It is something that, for us, grows organically as understanding grows and trust develops between the participants.

Hope this is answering the questions,

Calla Firestorm




oceanwynds -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 1:14:00 PM)

On my profile, i believe i do not have owned or not owned. My heart is with Sir. I am not looking for a Domaniant here or anywhere. I have accepted what Sir can offer me and am willing to live with that, which is not to collar me. I will not beg for a collar, since that is not his way. If later on he chooses differently, then He will let me know. I cannot speak for other submissives or slaves. They have other wants and needs, and I honor that. I just happy to serve Sir.

oceanwynds




Lockit -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 1:19:44 PM)

A collar is a serious thing to me and has more to do with what is in our hearts than what is on the neck. 

I see those who come here seeking and are quickly collared or taken and think... see you next week on the boards honey... wondering where master/mistress has gone or what to do about them.  Or a quick change artist.  Oh well... life is made up of many people and if they want the roller coaster... I will give them my ticket too... I don't need it.




NuevaVida -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 1:24:58 PM)

I was owned. To me it meant, quite literally, that he owned me. That he had the ultimate authority on all decisions having to do with me - what I learned, what I did, where I went, who I hung out with, what I ate, where I spent my money - I could go on. Everything. If he didn't like my thoughts, he would work with me (manipulate?) to change them. He could use me or store me away. In short, he managed my life.

It's too soon to say but I am doubtful I will give so much of myself over again. And if I do, it would be to someone who gave me more autonomy and authority over my life. My thoughts and feelings are not up for manipulation anymore, and I won't give them away like that. I tend to be really literal in my translations and I also tend to go to extremes with my experiences. I'm learning to find some better balance for myself.

But that's what owned meant to me. I don't know what it means to me anymore; I don't really think about it. Collared was a symbolic measure of degree of ownership. I don't know what I think about that anymore, either, nor do I spend any energy on it. Taken? Eh. It's an emotional expression of being totally enthralled with someone.

Being in a state of transition, I'm currently moving away from labels and their definitions, as I find they were pretty limiting for me. In time they may have meaning to me again. But right now, not so much.




greyjay -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 1:33:25 PM)

Very good discussion topic.  I have owned one before, but it is not something I jumped into lightly.  A true connection and love are required before I can even think about it.  I think alot of people have the wrong idea in here.  It takes more than a few days.  It takes really getting to know each other.  If it's an online or long distance realtionship, I would think it would take at least months to really get to that point.  (Personally I can't imagine falling in love without first meeting the other person--its easy to not be yourself when you are typing)




RCdc -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 1:33:56 PM)

It's just another way of 'saying' you are in a relationship.
 
the.dark.




kiwisub12 -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 1:53:47 PM)

I lived with my Sir for 8 months before he collared me. I was in a relationship with him before the collaring, the collaring formalised with us the degree of our relationship, and the depth of said relationship.  For us, the collaring was akin to getting married in its symbolism and seriousness.

At the time i really wanted the symbol - it made me more secure in how i felt about my Sir, and how he felt about me. Two years later, my Sir could take my collar off and it wouldn't bother me. I don't need the physical symbol any more.  I have internalised the symbol.




celticlord2112 -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 2:04:58 PM)

quote:

So what do the titles mean to you and clearly it is a question for both sides of the slash.

When I "take" a slave, it means I accept her into my household--she becomes part of my life and part of my world.  She agrees to be ruled, and I agree to rule.

When I "collar" a slave, it means I will keep her in my household permanently--that whatever issues and challenges arise we will work through, and that I won't just put her out the door because she's pissed me off.

Both are a part of "owning" a slave--which to me is the process of building and nurturing a relationship predicated on a power exchange dynamic.




CelticPrince -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 2:39:00 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: JustDarkness

I must love a girl or she must be a very very very good friend....before I even want her.
With out that ..I don't want to own


Darkness,

Well that takes care of owned, what about collared and taken?

Grins,

CP




CelticPrince -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 2:40:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Owned, collared, property.... To Me, these are family.  A place that can not be taken from My boy.  That he is Mine fills My heart with love and pride.  That this is My boy.  My sub.  That the trinket I place on his neck compares little to what he has in My heart.

Then again, I'm sentimental.  Not everyone feels this way.



LP, so I assume the terms are all inclusive for you!

CP




JustDarkness -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 2:49:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

quote:

ORIGINAL: JustDarkness

I must love a girl or she must be a very very very good friend....before I even want her.
With out that ..I don't want to own


Darkness,

Well that takes care of owned, what about collared and taken?

Grins,

CP


lol

you made me think :P  unfair

owned... collared..taken.... lovely words...and the same meaning to me..( I collar what I own...then I see her as taken)
now I was thinking..when I use what word...
I do use them differently..just don't know the reason yet..




kallisto -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 2:52:21 PM)

Taken - I see as a term loosely meaning a Dom has grabbed a sub's attention.   A genuine showing of interest. 

Owned - A committment has been made between a Dom and sub.  They are in a committed relationship to each other (whatever that relationship may be to them). 

Collared - Most times meaning an outward symbol of that committment, that others can see.   However, there doesn't have to be any outward symbol of  "being owned".    It can simply rest in the hearts of those in the relationship.    




tweedydaddy -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 3:00:42 PM)

What women I choose to collar belong to me,  where play is concerned, what they do with their husbands and lovers outside of my company is of course completely up to them. A girl in a collar belongs to me when she is in my company and I will do what I like with her, which usually involves either dress up and spanking or undress and a few hours on a leash.
LadyLove is a tad more possessive, but her slaves are pretty damn loyal and I respect that.




PanthersMom -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 3:02:24 PM)

for some, it's nothing more than saying they're "with" someone.  especially those newbies who are someone's property within three days of showing up here.  they have no idea.  for many more experienced folks, a collar means a real relationship, whether it be strictly for play or a deeply emotional connection between two kindred spirits.  i suppose everyone goes through that "growing up" stage in this life, we live and learn.

PM




IrishMist -> RE: Taken, Owned, Collar / meanings to you? (10/18/2008 3:09:16 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

Here I go pondering again. Being constantly interested in the mix of our path walkers I, when time permits, review the stats on newcomers. both the "D"s and the "s"s for a general profile of who and why they have come to the path. Many time I come across an eyeopener of a supposed newcomer to the path and its concepts and bingo after 3 days on CM they are "owned"

So what do the titles mean to you and clearly it is a question for both sides of the slash.

CP

They mean absolutly nothing to me.
I react to people; not to the title that they choose to call themselves with.




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