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RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/23/2005 4:04:08 PM

candystripper

Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline

quote:

I know Candy, that he just split from his Mistress. I was not putting him down per se...he kept throwing back advice on how to deal with the depression...I just wanted to make it clear that the only reason one IS alone on the holidays, is because they choose to be...Now notice I said IS and not FEELS. I know just as well as anyone what it's like to lose someone, and to go through those first holidays alone...it took some very brutal, and outspoken friends who showed me that I was doing nothing more than what Michael is doing here. Making excuses so that I could stay wrapped up in my self-pity.

Irish Mist

Yeah; i remember my first Xmas after i left my ex. My girlfriend had to have a heart to heart with me about getting a tree, etc., for the sake of my little kid....a fact that had escaped me as i was a mess for various reasons. Sometimes it takes someone who is a little distant but who cares to shake you and make you see what's in front of our faces.

If my kid doesn't come for Xmas it will be our first one apart; but adult children do that. It's one more baton passing, and this is what i always prayed for, a happy, healthy child who grew into a wonderful woman.

And not to be negative, but one thing i can always celebrate is my ex is not here, he he.

candystripper

< Message edited by candystripper -- 12/23/2005 4:05:16 PM >

(in reply to IrishMist)

Post #: 61

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/23/2005 4:46:16 PM

JohnWarren

Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper
Yeah; i remember my first Xmas after i left my ex.

My first wife left me in early December. At that time I (we actually) were in the middle of a stressful doctoral program and I was confined to a wheelchair with a serious leg injury.

It being an academic environment most people left early to be with their families during the holidays, but I was the last living member of my particular branch, my father having died a few months before.

I contacted a free kitchen and spent three days preparing, serving and cleaning up. It was a wonderful time. Great energy. Because, even then I had a white beard, I was assigned as Santa and had a great time giving gifts to wide-eyed children (and quickly learning why Santa has a plastic sheet on one thigh.)

As a bonus I met not one but two lovely co-eds who were curious about how someone with a busted leg could handle bedroom gymnastics. (Short answer = with enthusiasm) And while I missed my wife, having her see me for the next year with one or the other of the ladies pushing my chair (and her buttons) was fun.

At Christmas no one needs to be alone.... and if you're a good boy at Christmas, January might not be lonely.

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Post #: 62

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/23/2005 9:45:59 PM

Sensualips

Posts: 1013
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline

This will be my first Christmas alone. My soon-to-be ex has the short people Xmas eve till Monday noon. We will celebrate tomorrow, with my family. (And I use the word "family" loosely.)

I am slightly distresed about being apart from them for the day...but I think am more saddened by the idea they will spend it with their dad and his extended family - mom, sisters, nieces and nephews. The family that WAS my family for almost 15 years. I mean, my short people will have a great day and that pleases me. But it is that left-out no-one-even-cares-I-am-not-a-part-of-it any longer thing, Oh woe is me!

My closer friends will be out of town so I am opting to spend the day alone. I really feel okay about it, though there is this nagging fear in the back of my mind that when it actually gets here I may have a come apart and spend a good part of the day wallowing in self pity. However, I am okay with indulging in that now and again and moving on. So if anyone wants to give me the number for dial-a-coed, I will program it into my phone -- just in case.

(Yes, I do volunteer periodically and do have 2 hours planned to assist with a local project. But hey - it is a l-o-n-g day.)

(in reply to JohnWarren)

Post #: 63

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/23/2005 10:02:40 PM

michaelGA

Posts: 1194
Status: offline

try spending an entire week alone and no family or friends to visit. that REALLY sucks

(in reply to Sensualips)

Post #: 64

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/24/2005 3:41:45 AM

angelynne

Posts: 65
Joined: 10/6/2005
Status: offline

that pretty much is my life, LOL.... i only see the family on holidays and such. the depression isolation cycle.... always fun.

(in reply to michaelGA)

Post #: 65

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/24/2005 4:53:58 AM

fyreredsub

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline

take the time to pamper yourself in some way, be nurturing to you...give to you....even if one is alone...it doesnt have to sux....find something to do, go volunteer at hosea's feed the hungry, do something that will get you out of you for a bit then...

"i felt bad i had no shoes,til i met a man that had no feet."

blessing to you

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

try spending an entire week alone and no family or friends to visit. that REALLY sucks

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(in reply to michaelGA)

Post #: 66

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/24/2005 6:43:05 AM

andrew77uk

Posts: 33
Joined: 4/6/2005
Status: offline

christmas is so commerialised these days that sometimes solitude is a good thing to have, allows you to reflect =)

(in reply to MissHarlet)

Post #: 67

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/24/2005 8:19:59 AM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

try spending an entire week alone and no family or friends to visit. that REALLY sucks

Michael, let's go back 10 years, and you can sit in my place at that time. I lost my husband 2 days before Christmas . I had a small child who could not understand why her father was not there, and I was such a mess that I could not explain it to her. My family could not come to Texas at that time...and neither could his...after all, it was Christmas time...I had to do it alone...all of it...and try to be happy for my daughter at the same time.

The point is...everyone has times in their life when it feels as if they are ALONE. Don't let those feelings turn into a reality. Go somewhere, be with someone....ANYONE...do something....it all comes down to your own choice on how you spend this holiday.

*edited for spelling*

< Message edited by IrishMist -- 12/24/2005 8:33:16 AM >

(in reply to michaelGA)

Post #: 68

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/24/2005 8:32:09 AM

michaelGA

Posts: 1194
Status: offline

i was in Oklahoma 10 years ago, sorry for your loss. i lost a son back then so i know what You went through, just wish i had been allowed costody, maybe he would have drowned due to poor supervision.

(in reply to IrishMist)

Post #: 69

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/24/2005 3:53:09 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

Wow Michael; cannot say I understand how you feel as that is the worst possible thing I can personally can imagine happening to someone.
Stay safe and warm. M

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Post #: 70

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/24/2005 4:17:36 PM

michaelGA

Posts: 1194
Status: offline

as always, i'll live. afterall, i've already outlived most of my family already.

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Post #: 71

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/24/2005 11:39:32 PM

FangsNfeet

Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline

If you're all alone during Christmas, and unable to see any friends or family, I recomend a few things.

1. Chirstmas Eve: Dress up as Santa and go to a strip joint.

2. Christmas Day: Go to a church near you. You may not agree with the religion or the concept of God but atleast it's good food. Sometimes it's free while other churchs ask for a donation. So you have good food and around nice folk wishing you a Merry Christmas. Also, some of the most kinkiest people I know are church members.

After all, listening to "A Blue Christmas" by Elvis isn't going to help much.

< Message edited by FangsNfeet -- 12/24/2005 11:42:07 PM >

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Post #: 72

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/27/2005 1:53:05 PM

FangsNfeet

Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

i'm not sure if this is a blessing or a curse, but this year, i'll be spending Christmas at home...alone. no tree, no gifts, no family...just me. this is what i get for moving to GA. unfortunately, i am not able to move away and i don't know hardly anyone here. just another day for me this year.

So michaelGA. With all the ideas and thoughts everyone here gave you, what did you end up doing for Christmas?

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Post #: 73

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/27/2005 2:46:42 PM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

So michaelGA. With all the ideas and thoughts everyone here gave you, what did you end up doing for Christmas?

yes, I would be interested in hearing also what you did for Christmas. :)

(in reply to FangsNfeet)

Post #: 74

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/27/2005 10:08:42 PM

veronicaofML

Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline

as always, i'll live. afterall, i've already outlived most of my family already.
===========

if it's any help michael..
i spent the entire day alone..since Mistress and hubby went to relatives...
and "I" already outlived my elders.
i have none left.
no siblings
no kids
no pets
it's just me and my van...

take care michael
i suspect the entire day new years i will be alone as well...but we will see.

ah well.
i like being alone..just me and this machine...

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(in reply to michaelGA)

Post #: 75

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/27/2005 10:57:15 PM

michaelGA

Posts: 1194
Status: offline

i sometimes think i prefer being with my PC over people myself. at least i can turn it off if it upsets me, turn it on when i'm lonely and it never shuns me or ignores me. it's always close at hand and never tells me to shut up or not to talk to it any longer.

maybe PCs are the only true friend people have in this world. although i have made some human friends here and some human annoyances, my PC is always by my side.

it never complains when i rant or "whine" either. it never puts me down for speaking my mind and it's better than any anti-depressant i have ever had to take, much more effective too.

(in reply to veronicaofML)

Post #: 76

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/28/2005 4:33:37 PM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

michael, if I can be so bold, your profile says you have a wife wheelchair bound with MDA were you two not together?

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Post #: 77

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/28/2005 9:10:33 PM

michaelGA

Posts: 1194
Status: offline

not wife...gf and we are still together. she knows of my interests and involvement in the lifestyle. i do not hide anything from her. is there a question, here?

(in reply to MHOO314)

Post #: 78

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/28/2005 9:39:25 PM

Sensualips

Posts: 1013
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline

Well, I downloaded porn and ate cookies till I felt a little ill. It was not bad.

(in reply to IrishMist)

Post #: 79

RE: Spending Christmas Alone - 12/28/2005 9:43:56 PM

michaelGA

Posts: 1194
Status: offline

well, i've waited 10 years to get my gift...a real life scene...guess i can wait 10 more years.

(in reply to Sensualips)

Post #: 80

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