Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: smarts and domliness/subliness


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: smarts and domliness/subliness Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 10:56:15 PM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline 		*curtsey*  thank you Sir!

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:05:38 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Considers a witty comment to win her heart but instead throws her over his shoulders and runs off with her ignoring her squeels of protest...oh yeah, I did do that, didn't I? 

Intelligence IS important. One of the things I adore about BSB is that I can talk to her without having to think "is this over her head?", a feeling I relish deeply.  Being intellectually matched on some level is really important. 

(edited for punctuation and grammar by BossyGrammarBitch)

< Message edited by SimplyMichael -- 11/6/2008 11:09:42 PM >

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:12:46 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Woman,

I think we did to this thread what we did to that last hotel room, the one where there was blood everywhere!  Lets tip the help and sneak out of here.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:12:48 PM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline 		I'm back... Did you miss me?

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:18:08 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		I do miss you, I think it is high time I threw you over my shoulder again, this time to run along the beach rather than up a steep mountain trail.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:19:35 PM   
NorthernGent


Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sravaka

Obviously, there are many kinds of intelligence. 



I've undertaken one IQ test in my life......'think I was 14 and it was imposed upon us by one of our teachers, rather than a choice.....I can't remember the exact score but at best it was average for my age. Throughout school, I excelled in History, English Literature and Religious Education, but was always found wanting in the sciences (I once scored 13% in a Physics exam......I mean, turn up and write your name on the paper and you got 10%!), and it wasn't that I didn't try, I simply couldn't get my head around science subjects. The point of this is to say that in part at least, intelligence is perceived according to where your interests lie; consequently, common ground is of more significance.

Ultimately, though, a world of regurgitating the same, old tired lines, would be a mundane one; it follows thus inspiration is a matter of the following: can you come up with something different?

Edited length of quote.

< Message edited by NorthernGent -- 11/6/2008 11:30:58 PM >

_____________________________

I have the courage to be a coward - but not beyond my limits.

Sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

(in reply to sravaka)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:23:14 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		Your Dominant doesn’t have to be smarter than you in order for you obey them and conduct a successful BDSM style relationship.  However, if you “live for intellectual discourse” and consider yourself “over-educated”, the other aspects of a good relationship foundation would seem to fall short if you don’t find someone intellectually compatible. 

I have seen more than one smart submissive friend that fell in love with a dominant that was less than their intellectual equal.  I have seen both positive and negative results from this kind if pairing.  My exposure to this situation is limited so this is by no means a sweeping prediction for all but I share my limited exposure to it with hopes it will help your perspectives.

In many monogamous examples I have seen the relationships exhaust themselves because passion only carried the submissive for so long before life’s other qualities created desires that eventually required fulfillment.  In more than a dozen examples it never seemed to go much past the first year.

In a few poly examples, I have seen a Dominant utilize the intellect of his submissive and the sub felt quite fulfilled by having assets that were a benefit to the family.  The submissive found intimate intellectual balance and fulfillment from the family as a whole.  It seemed to be healthy and constructive for all.  2 poly examples immediately come to mind that have 5 years and over 10 years of bliss to their credit so far. 

One apple doesn’t make a barrel and I am not trying to sell dumb poly, smart mono or anything else.  I am simply trying to expand perspectives.  I am sure that any well-crafted relationship, mono/poly/smart/average, can be successful if it allows both parties fulfillment.  Like a domestically oriented service submissive that likes to feed their Dominant, the occasional restaurant shouldn’t hurt the relationship.  I am sure that non Mensa member Dominants, be they mono or poly, can allow a smart submissive to “feed their head” as needed even if all the meals don’t come from home. 

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 11/6/2008 11:30:37 PM >

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to CuddlyParrotGirl)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:23:41 PM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline 		But i think I can do the mountain trail this time around!


Ok. Sorry. End of hijack..

It's not about IQ or how many years of education someone has.  For me, it's about insight,intellect,common sense and a thirst for knowledge.  If I  am with someone who lacks a decent level of any of these traits, it ain't for long.

< Message edited by BossyShoeBitch -- 11/6/2008 11:29:13 PM >

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:25:48 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Lets leave this thread to those who aren't in estrus over IQ.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:26:11 PM   
sravaka


Posts: 314
Joined: 6/20/2008
Status: offline 		Lovely to see that you two are so well matched.

Thanks to everyone else for your replies... so much food for thought already.  I agree whole-heartedly that one of the keys is being with someone from whom you can learn things, whatever those things may be, and hopeful who is also willing to learn from you in return.

It's easy to say "never settle"... and I think that myself, often...  but if the choices are between finding some component to settle on and being alone?  What does one do?  What is most negotiable?

(probably rhetorical questions)






_____________________________

Miseries hold me fixed, and I would gladly cut these roots to become a floating plant. I would yield myself up utterly, if the inviting stream could be relied upon. --Ono no Komachi

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:30:29 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CuddlyParrotGirl

quote:

mine falls in the top 98%


Um, I would certainly hope so.  It if fell within the bottom 2% you probably couldn't figure out how to post to this forum.

I believe you probably mean the 98th percentile, not the top 98%. 


ehh I think whoever posted that pulled the 98 number out of "thin air"  It's pretty obvious that they have zero understanding of how basic percentages work. Sheesh. 

It's real curious how the "self proclaimed" smart folks crawl out of the woodwork, to say see I'm supersmart but that is not why I'm saying it in this thread.

Me on the other hand I'm a idoit who has somehow muddled thru life, made a couple of bucks.  In other words, your average sailor.  Who has girl who is in a lot of ways smarter than me and in other ways not as smart.  She has talents that I do not have.  I have talents that she enjois.  Somehow it all works out.

BadOne

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to CuddlyParrotGirl)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:33:22 PM   
moonvine


Posts: 780
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sravaka


It's easy to say "never settle"... and I think that myself, often...  but if the choices are between finding some component to settle on and being alone?  What does one do?  What is most negotiable?




I've been asking that myself a lot lately as well. 

(in reply to sravaka)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:34:05 PM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline 		One component to settle on?  Which component?

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to sravaka)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:36:07 PM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sravaka
but if the choices are between finding some component to settle on and being alone?  What does one do?  What is most negotiable?




I suppose it depends on if you see yourself "alone" as settling. I find it is perfectly OK to be alone. I tend to enjoy my own company! So, for me, submitting to someone is an enhancement to my life. Therefore, I would much rather be alone than in a relationship of any sort that will ultimately leave me frustrated. Only you can decide for yourself where your marker is.

_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to sravaka)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:43:53 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		You know you are a collarme addict when you answer rhetorical questions.  LOL

I’d settle for someone that was “pussy smart” and good company because I can get other intellectual satisfactions from things like books.  Although a book makes for good company for many people, I prefer something more cuddly. 



_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to NuevaVida)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:45:41 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		I will stay alone and ready rather than to settle.  Life is hard enough... but to spend it... I mean waste it with someone arguing or bored to death... so not worth the risk of passing a good fit up because you were no longer alone.  At least being single you are open to finding someone.  What happens if you settle and a month later the good fit comes along?  Ouch!

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to NuevaVida)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:48:15 PM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

You know you are a collarme addict when you answer rhetorical questions.  LOL



Oh hell I answer rhetorical questions all the time. But then I talk to myself and answer back, too. I'm a strange bird that way.

_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:54:26 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

I will stay alone and ready rather than to settle.  Life is hard enough... but to spend it... I mean waste it with someone arguing or bored to death... so not worth the risk of passing a good fit up because you were no longer alone.  At least being single you are open to finding someone.  What happens if you settle and a month later the good fit comes along?  Ouch!

I took the OP at face value to mean “intellectual equal-or-superior”.  I don’t think they meant an argumentative dolt.  In my reply I meant that I could be happy with someone of lesser intellect but did not mean to imply that their shoe size surpassed their IQ.

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:55:12 PM   
suhlut


Posts: 622
Joined: 7/20/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

You know you are a collarme addict when you answer rhetorical questions.  LOL

I’d settle for someone that was “pussy smart” and good company because I can get other intellectual satisfactions from things like books.  Although a book makes for good company for many people, I prefer something more cuddly. 




Sooooo... what is "pussy smart"?

_____________________________

That girl is pretty kinky
The girl's a super freak

SUPERFREAK ~by Rick James

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: smarts and domliness/subliness - 11/6/2008 11:55:52 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		In a nutshell:

It's useful to remember that is a need for you isn't for everyone. Sweeping generalizations are rarely true.

Don't settle. If this is important to you, make it a prime factor in choosing a partner.


Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to sravaka)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: smarts and domliness/subliness Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094