RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (Full Version)

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leadership527 -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 10:52:28 AM)

Historically, I have always wanted older woman... perhaps 5-10 years or so.  I valued the maturity levels and relationship skills I found in that pool more than I valued the perks of younger women.  Now that I'm 44 though, I don't think it so much matters.  I think that I could probably go as low as 35 for a very special 35 year old and as high as 55 easily.. 65 maybe.  My wife likes em young (she's got 8 years on me).  To be fair, my wife is kind of 55 going on 35 in a lot of ways.



OrionTheWolf -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 11:54:46 AM)

I find them more beautiful and less jaded. In 20 years I have had one relationship with a female close to my age, and it was the worst I have ever had. Most are 9+ years younger than me, and my current property is 19 years younger than me.


quote:

ORIGINAL: Eliana

It would also be interesting to hear why some of them do or would prefer younger women.

Thanks!



teensub -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 12:06:42 PM)

I didn't set out looking for an older master, but i do prefer older guys in general. My master is 21 years older than me.

I think i would find it difficult having someone my age or younger telling me what to do.

I have never been able to really explain why i prefer older man, some people find it odd but im happy.



natasha66 -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 12:18:11 PM)

i honestly cannot be bothered with men my age or younger....the maturity level and life experience just isn't there.



colouredin -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 12:21:11 PM)

one thing i have noticed in D/s in particular is an assumption that age = experiance, a lot of very young girls have relationships with much older men to gain 'respect' in the scene or be sene to be a real true sub, that may sound cynical but its the truth



VampiresLair -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 12:27:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Eliana
I've observed these days that not only do a lot of the younger women clearly want men who are also younger, but in recent years a lot of the OLDER women also want - and get - men much younger than themselves.  There seems to be a feeling that the younger men don't have the "old attitudes" which is to say they don't generally display the chauvinistic attitudes which tend to be more prevalent in the older generations, and that young men make them much happier.

The other problem I run into with older men tended to be a desire to slow down and settle in. I am in my early 30s, I am not ready to slow down or settle in yet. I enjoy being active, traveling, going to amusement parks and doing things of that nature. When I tried to have a relationship with an older man, the first thing he wanted to do was relax... all the time. Any activity I wanted to go out and do was either vetoed or he complained the whole time we were out (he was vanilla) and so I decided I was going to go for someone closer to my own activity level rather than my own age.

Fox is 10 years younger than I am. Most of my closest friends are under 25, and I am perfectly happy with that.
DV



Venatrix -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 12:33:42 PM)

I'm 49 and when my profile was active, I made it clear that I wasn't interested in anyone younger than 38, yet I would still get hordes of men in their early 20s wanting to submit.  A man that age couldn't possibly hold my interest for more than a few minutes.  I can certainly understand the appeal an older woman would have for them, but they've got to offer something in return.



teensub -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 12:41:00 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

one thing i have noticed in D/s in particular is an assumption that age = experiance, a lot of very young girls have relationships with much older men to gain 'respect' in the scene or be sene to be a real true sub, that may sound cynical but its the truth


I dont think this is always the case



hopelessfool -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 12:43:53 PM)

I prefer older men, to me part of my owners job is to teach and guide me, He can make judgement calls because for the most part he knows better hes older hes lived longer and made most of the mistakes im about to. How is someone a few years older then me going to know better? 



Barelily -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 12:49:25 PM)

quote:

There seems to be a feeling that the younger men don't have the "old attitudes" which is to say they don't generally display the chauvinistic attitudes which tend to be more prevalent in the older generations, and that young men make them much happier

I know you were just generalizing here, but people do tend to do "selective reading" and this could serve to convince people it's true.

I wish younger guys had more of those "old" attitudes.

I've found just the opposite, older men (my age or older) seem to be a bit more grounded, mature and respectful. Their dominance flows more naturally, most likely because the majority of them have been Dom's longer and tend to be more secure and experienced. They just know more because they've had more years to learn.(The ones I've spoken with). "Most" of the men I get messages from are my age older, so I'm not sure it's true that they are only looking for women half their age.

In "most" messages from younger ones there was alot of the assumption I was just going to magically submit right away and general rude behavior. It's almost like they don't get it yet. But I'm not so closed minded that I wouldn't take a look at a younger guy who was mature for his age.


Disclaimer: This post was made in response to the post made by Eliana and is based on my opinion and experiences only.



ExKat -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 12:53:03 PM)

  ~fast reply~

  Yup, I've seen some rare young subbies looking for a significantly older dominants. I'd say they're the minority. However, even some subbie's not specifically looking for someone older will wind up with someone older...there are loads of couples here on the forum with a 10, 20, or even 30 year difference.



JustDarkness -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 1:16:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

one thing i have noticed in D/s in particular is an assumption that age = experiance, a lot of very young girls have relationships with much older men to gain 'respect' in the scene or be sene to be a real true sub, that may sound cynical but its the truth


true, but I think they mean life experience...not life-style experience.
But for sure there are enough young people that know a lott...and with a fresh view...that is a great experience I think.



Lynnxz -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 1:45:04 PM)

I've always dated about 10 years my senior, but did not actively seek them out. 



flower2007 -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 2:12:29 PM)

I'm nearing 30 and would kill to find a dominant in his early 30's.  50 year old men remind me too much of my father (with whom I have a great relationship).



colouredin -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 2:21:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: teensub

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

one thing i have noticed in D/s in particular is an assumption that age = experiance, a lot of very young girls have relationships with much older men to gain 'respect' in the scene or be sene to be a real true sub, that may sound cynical but its the truth


I dont think this is always the case


No of course not always, but sometimes which is why i pointed it out



theobserver -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 2:27:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Eliana

I've observed these days that not only do a lot of the younger women clearly want men who are also younger, but in recent years a lot of the OLDER women also want - and get - men much younger than themselves. 


I cannot speak to the rest of your post because I'm not an older man, but as a woman of 31 years old, I will say that, for me, I would prefer to date men who are close to my age or a bit older. I have in the past, thought that dating a man my parents age would be a bit unsettling, but now, as long as he can't be my Grandfather I'm fine.

I say this because, for me it's about two people being at a certain place in their lives, where they can find some common ground. I feel a lot more secure in finding that with an older man, who has a lot of life experience and maturity, rather than someone younger, who still has a ways to go and are feeling out their place and identity in the world.

(edited for many reasons)



kristileigh -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 3:18:02 PM)

i am 38 and Master is 50. i have always been attracted to older men.

Also i have played with a couple of Doms who were more my age.........no thank You
age does equal expierience.



antipode -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 4:13:35 PM)

quote:

since I reached fifty


It is true that 50 is a cutoff point - as far as online dating / meeting / whatever is concerned.



DavanKael -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 7:03:52 PM)

Haven't ever been in an relationship with someone younger than me.  Significant relationships have ranged from the person being from a bit less than 2 years-12+ years older than I am.  There could always be exceptions but I think 15 years older would be about the maximum. 
  Davan



PurpleSockx -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/9/2008 7:09:32 PM)

I prefer either around my age (28) or a bit older personally. My first dominant was much older than me, 18 years older. I felt comfortable about it because I was totally new to this and he had the experience and patience to handle the "little green thing" that I was then. But the big age difference became harder for us has the relationship developped into something more than just BDSM play.



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