RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (Full Version)

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satyrsnymph28 -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 1:36:56 AM)

i just did a search for my username online after reading this post...

it was amazing to me what i found. 

i HIGHLY advise everyone google their name/screen name/ etc, to see what appears.

then you'll know what's out there about you, and be able to remove what you wish not to be there. 




Evility -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 2:43:01 AM)

I wouldn't be worried about my employer finding out about any of this and custody/visitation snags are no longer an issue. I'm not partner hunting here so no need for a pic for that purpose. Everyone who does not post a picture is not ashamed of themselves or hiding in fear. I'm not the type who needs to validate myself by having a bullwhip and a pair of handcuffs hanging from my belt 24/7. My private life is just that - private.




JustDarkness -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 3:56:05 AM)

For privacy I use never email names with my own name, same counts for profile names.
My picture is here...but can never be linked to me directly.
Besides my job is not of such kind that my private life will have a negative effect.

It also helps this is a forum outside my own country...and not so many dutch people come here...compared to dutch forums.




lally3 -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 4:46:27 AM)

im self employed, so not a problem - and so probably easy for me to say that if i approached an employer who took that sort of nosy approach id tell them where to stick their job.  there are such things as police checks for employers to go through, fine, they should keep it to that and leave a persons private life alone.

a person cant be stigmatised for being gay these days, though im sure they are, or black or the wrong sex or nationality for legal reasons, so why should our lifestyle  be any different. 

not that youd want to, but if youre employer suddenly fired you and you suspected unfair dismissal on those grounds i believe youd have a case to take to court. 

the whole bdsm thing is so out there now.  pop videos (disturbia) for instance are doing it.  comedians are using it to raise a laugh or two, tv dramas are exploring it.  it is stigmatised, but i think in a totally hypocritical way - people are curious but dont understand it, theyre 'frightened' of it in the same way they were frightened of gays - ignorance and a question of personal choice muddy the waters.  for us it isnt choice so much, but the way we're wired.  i thnk the more we take the attitude of 'so what and whats your problem' the better.




candystripper -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 5:13:44 AM)

I'm self-employed, so no.  However, I would be at risk in many ways if it became widely-known among my family or clients that I was 'into kink'.
 
I have a girlfriend who had a 'humilating' profile pic, back in the day, on this site.  She used her PC at work to get on CM, and one of her f**ktard co-workers went into her office, checked the 'History' on her browser and 'outted' her by circulating that picture all over the office, even among her supervisors.
 
As far as I know, CM no longer permits folks to upload 'humiliating' profile pics; but if you google your nick on CM, you will be shocked at what you find.
 
If you need to keep your 'kinkiness' private, and selectively decide who to out yourself to, then it wise to use caution about what you upload on here.
 
candystripper  [sm=pole.gif]




sambamanslilgirl -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 5:29:23 AM)

i'm not worried about anyone at the radio station finding my pictures here. they're only pictures of me and not with anyone else. i save photos of me with bands, etc for my photobucket, going.com, reverbnation, and myspace sites. i'm more worried about my family/relatives venturing in a place like this but they won't.

however, Daddy and my pet/bf - they're in positions in which a photo on here could cost them their jobs. so they leave their CM profiles photo-less.




SadysticJester -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 5:53:36 AM)

if you google your name you will be surprised what you may discover,,,or not....every site you belong to is associated with your name.this may not be for everyone,but past experiences has proven to be true for the most part..i however dont have to worry about this but my slave does so she is cautious,as cautious as she can be and still enjoy her world.




candystripper -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 5:55:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: proudsub

It's not just pictures that can out you.  Be sure your screen name isn't one you use for email or on other sites, becasue if someone googles your screen name it will point them to Collarme.


Ya, no shit, LMAO.  I had a similar nick on MySpace as on CM till I 'clued in' to the fact that a search would bring up both!
 
BTW, I've been told that another CM member can 'read' your IP addy from receiving CM mail from you. Anybody know if that's true?
 
I get some trolls in my Inbox like everyone else.  I have decided to quit emailing the deranged, LOL.
 
candystripper  [sm=pole.gif]




MrHarsh -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 5:57:36 AM)

Over the last few years I've been to a lot of job interviews.  Almost all of my prospective employers have used a Google search (or some other tool) to find out a few things about me before the interview.  Sometimes they mention something - but I'm sure that I've not gotten second interviews because of how open I am about certain things...

There are lines of work out there that require one to keep a cleaner slate.  And don't be fooled, many employers are using search engines to dig up dirt on you.

For the most part though, I just want to keep certain parts of my life private.  I don't want my co-workers, or even some of my friends, to know all the details of my personal life.  Not all friendships require that much information! 

I'll certainly share a picture or two with interested people, but I'm not going to post anything too identifying on my profile.




candystripper -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 5:58:21 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Usako

I really wouldn't want a job where what I do in private and never bring to work would cause me to get fired.


Huh?  Like, where the f**k do you work?  Even a fast food resturant would fire me if'n I were arrested, for Gawd's sake.  Of course folks need their privacy.
 
candystripper  [sm=pole.gif]




candystripper -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 6:00:28 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

I still have pictures on my profile but for how much longer i don't know. I work in a trade where it is imperative i do not have a criminal record. With the new laws regarding BDSM porn etc, it may well become to big a risk for me to leave my pic's up.
It suck's but it's not smething that overly bothers me. Plus peeps won't have to look at my ugly mug anymore [:D]
 


You're a beautiful woman, missturbation.  I'd be more concerned about who on the 'net is viewing me.
 
Peace out.
 
candystripper




OneMoreWaste -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 6:21:37 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SadysticJester
if you google your name you will be surprised what you may discover,,,or not....every site you belong to is associated with your name.


Really, some common sense solves this problem. I'm on more than a dozen message boards for several different hobbies, and I use a different screen name for each "group" of boards (i.e., I have a screen name for kink-related forums, a screen name for car-related forums, etc.). I have one email address with my real name on it, which I use for job searches and nothing else. I have no problem revealing my first name, which has been one of the 10 most popular male names for a century or two. My last name is uncommon, and I don't reveal that in any public forum. Google turns up a couple references from my involvement in a college service fraternity, a technology article I was quoted in, and that's it. And I've been actively discussing all matter of stuff on the 'net since 1994. Common sense.




candystripper -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 6:24:27 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KneelforAnne

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

I still have pictures on my profile but for how much longer i don't know. I work in a trade where it is imperative i do not have a criminal record. With the new laws regarding BDSM porn etc, it may well become to big a risk for me to leave my pic's up.
It suck's but it's not smething that overly bothers me. Plus peeps won't have to look at my ugly mug anymore [:D]
 


Hello,

May I ask what new laws, and what they apply toward?

Thanks either way! 

~anne


Anne, folks in Great Britain, Australia, and other countries are subject to different laws than folks in the U.S.
 
Here in Cleveland,Ohio, I have an issue with my banking, which I do on-line.  However, even assuming there are still cops on the payroll in Cuyahoga County, I would be very reluctant to give my hard drive to a detective to use as evidence if fraud is actually happening.  (Dunno yet.)
 
We have had a nutter District Attorney here in this county who tried to evade a plea agreement with one of our politicos -- caught for something -- embezzling I think -- after the cops excuted a search warrant on his home and found -- gasp! -- sado-masocistic porn on his hard drive.
 
It's a matter of community standards I think, whether being on a kink site on the 'net subjects you to any criminal liability.  What happens to Cleveland prolly doesn't happen in San Fransico or New Orleans.
 
(Why do I always end up in the 'cheap seats', LOL.)
 
candystripper  [sm=pole.gif]




candystripper -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 6:40:32 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Racquelle

Under very few circumstances would it be legal for an employer, in the US, to search for a person here, and if they did and found something, for them to use it as a means for not hiring, dismissal, or passing one over for a promotion.    I have heard anecdotal stories of employers hunting on myspace, but never actually met any HR reps who would bother.  Typically most background checking is performed by a contracted company, and none of the ones I know would violate the FCRA (which governs background reporting) by doing something so foolish.


Nope.  Anyone who wishes to hire you or retain you is entitled to any info available by public means. I am no longer certain, with the advent of Intelius.com, etc., whether even a sealed juvie record would be 'protected''.
 
The 'net has been a blessing, no doubt about it.  I used to use actual books, LMAO, to do my work.  Only in the past few years have I begun using the 'net to 'play' and I'm on CM primarially because (a) I want a power dynamic my relationship and (b) I wouln't go around telling that to folks here in Cleveland.
 
I have warned the young adults in my family about this goofey shit of posting degrading pics of yrself at Facebook or MySpace, because they are going to render themselves unemployable if they do it. I have also cautioned them about emailing pics from camera phones and text messaging, as that is like being wire-tapped.  The 'listener' has a recording, i.e., evidence, of what you 'said'.
 
The world is changing rapidly due to technology, and privacy as we believe we are 'entitled' to it is really a myth, left over from the past.
 
candystripper  [sm=pole.gif]




Rover -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 7:21:10 AM)

Everyone needs to decide for themselves what level of risk they're willing to accept.  But think about this for a moment... how would anyone find your picture here at Collarme, for instance?  You're not using your own name... it can't be found during a Google search.  Would one of your colleagues at work go to the boss saying "I was browsing through Collarme, a BDSM personals site, and happened across Joe's picture on a profile there."?
 
Talk about self incrimination.
 
John




pdv99 -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 7:23:38 AM)

I guess the only thing to do is to use a profile pic that doesn't show your face or any idenifiable feature.

I must say I hadn't realised that Collarme profiles came up on Google - profiles on other sites don't, so maybe there is a technical fix here - how many of us want our profile to come up on Google? If most dont, maybe the mods could exclude profiles from Google - there is advice here http://www.google.com/support/webmasters/bin/answer.py?hl=en&answer=35301
about using "noindex" metatags




SteelofUtah -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 8:10:20 AM)

I have No worries.

As for Employers, All the info they have for me doesn't relate to ANYTHING I have on my Profile other than my City and should they happen to find me by doing random searches then you know I would rather not work for a place that wants to control your Outside life.

Both of my Bosses are LDS and we talk alot about my drug rehab and my former jobs are Strip Club Bouncers in Vegas and the truth of the matter is they really don't care what I do or what I have done. I don't think I would want to work for a place that did.

But you know I am open with what I do so should it cause me to get fired I am sure I would be upset about losing the Job but it wouldn't change the way I go about things.

Steel




SteelofUtah -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 8:11:58 AM)

What I thought was Iteresting is all 2415 posts were listed on Google. as well as all the Other Profiles I am Listed as Friends On.

Plus any site where my Posts were reposted. and by the time I got to Page 70 there were posts I made here being reposted on other sites.

Steel




thetammyjo -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 8:19:24 AM)

I made a decision to be out years ago with my first book.

If a university or college can't handle that, it isn't the place for me. However what I do here has almost zero to do with my academic life so frankly it's none of their business. They want to snoop around and "discover" things, have fun with that.




slaveluci -> RE: Picture in the Profile versus Fear for you Job (11/12/2008 8:40:52 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: scarlethiney
  If my employer is on Collarme looking then he really isn't in any position to find much to criticize me about now is he?

No I am not concerned about my employer hunting me down on Collarme.

Well, I'm sure they wouldn't admit just how they found out.  And it wouldn't really matter anyway once the cat was out of the bag. 
quote:

I can't imagine who you work for that would be investigating your lifestyle unless it were some  government or police agency. Of course I never considered that teachers would be so concerned. Most of the teachers I know are on web sites like this.

Scenarios vary so much from case to case and place to place.  At a former workplace, a woman and her husband resigned (under threat of being fired) and their "case" made front page news in the town.  They were found to have been on a similar site (with face and risque pix posted) and it ruined them.  Their jobs involved small children so it was therefore assumed the kiddies could never be safe again because the adults at school had private, kinky sex lives at home away from them[8|].  I don't recall anyone giving a fat frog's ass HOW someone just stumbled across their profiles and WHY that person/persons weren't called onto the carpet for being "perve's" too.  It didn't matter.  She was publically humiliated, as was her husband, and questions were then raised about their parenting skills, etc. 

The bottom line is not everyone lives in NY,  LA and other major metropolitan areas where skipping out to get naked and beaten at the local corner dungeon is winked out and overlooked.  Many people live in "small town" areas where - like it or not - the fact is that revealing certain info about ourselves and our "kinks" if you will can be a dangerous, life-altering thing.  It doesn't mean we have to "deny our true selves" but it does mean we can't put on a g-string and paste smiling pix of ourselves on kinky sites for the whole world to see because real consequences could follow.  Sad and unfair but unfortunately true in many cases.

I personally don't see it as a major problem.  I've sent photos to many nice people I've gotten to know from CM.  Just because I don't have any posted for any stranger to see doesn't mean no one can ever see if I so choose.  It's just not that big of an issue and being cautious makes a world of sense................luci




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