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ORIGINAL: CallaFirestormBW

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ORIGINAL: OttersSwim

So let's warp this even more...does our community perceive it more acceptable for a woman to be a switch than a man?  If so...then why?

I believe the answer is "Yes"...

If you agree that the answer is Yes...then what does that imply about the overall perception of the traditional roles of women and men in the BDSM community?  A couple of ways of looking at that and it will be interesting and telling to see folk's thoughts. 

Before I walk down this landmine-infested road, I want to say that there are some cultural/community generalizations here, showing -trends- that I've noticed within the community, and that I -recognize-, completely, that many very outspoken members of the community who participate in this venue do not fit these generalizations... but there is a significant portion of the community not fully represented by those who speak out often in this venue, and the generalizations -do- mesh with my experiences in 25 years of interaction with the 'community-at-large'.

I find that the "community-at-large" still has issues with males in -any- role that isn't strictly dominant, EXCEPT for the gay male portion of the community, which is, in my experience, substantially more flexible, but also not nearly as represented in the 'community-at-large' as they are in their own more insular sub-groupings. Submissive males are essentially dismissed by both many d-type males -and- many s-type females, and switches have to deal with vacillating acceptance that rises when they 'accept' their place as dominants, and sinks into the very bottom of the toilet when they express their submission.

In general, though, female dominants still get a lot of short shrift in the current community of WIITWD as well, though with an exception in the lesbian subgroup, which has many of the same features of being less well represented and less involved in the mainstream community as the gay male population expressing WIITWD. Again, they're often dismissed by a significant portion of the male d-types -and- many of the female s-types as well. In addition, female switches are encouraged to "pick one or the other"... and subtly manipulated into choosing the 's' side by not only the community of WIITWD, but by the general community as well, who still, even in the 21st century, have this ingrained concept that subtly expresses that women -really- should be under a man's scrutiny and control, and shouldn't 'exceed' herself.