RE: Asking too much to clean up the language?

RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (Full Version)

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chiaThePet -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/14/2008 7:02:09 PM)
[sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif] "Mind your manners boy." Mother always used to say. "Or I'll knock the shit out of you and send you flying across the fucking room." chia* (the pet)

lovingpet -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/14/2008 7:30:54 PM)
[8D] lovingpet

SunNMoon -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/14/2008 7:59:21 PM)
It doesn't bother me at all but then again I swear like there is no tomorrow (when not at work, around family or small childern). But think of it this way you just weeded him out as someone for you.

Lashra -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/14/2008 8:01:26 PM)
I work in construction, so did my Father, cursing is just part of our make up lol. Though I try to keep it to a minimum. As for this email you got he sounds like a jackass, I would just ignore him. ~Lashra

FullfigRIMaam -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/14/2008 11:40:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: shymetalsub I really do find the idea that cursing is harmful and disrespectful to be dated and a little silly. Cursing is just something that people do, and to not hide or censor what you're thinking in it's raw entirety is honest speech in my opinion. I disagree, but have always been something of an old soul even when I was 10. I'm fairly free with my language now, but not in mixed company, and certainly not when meeting someone I'm unfamiliar with. Proper manners to some extent will never go out of style, even if only for their civilizing influence, if not other reasons... Like the fact that some folks respond with violent behavior to violent/disrespectful/fowl speech. In some cultures, it's considered extremely disrespectful. In my opinion, there is a time and a place for being free with one's mouth, and than there are those times you're trying to impress someone you don't know yet, who may or may not get down with that. M

MsStarlett -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 4:02:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: chiaThePet [sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif][sm=mop.gif] "Mind your manners boy." Mother always used to say. "Or I'll knock the shit out of you and send you flying across the fucking room." chia* (the pet) [:D][:D][:D][:D][:D] Ok... I've been reading along. I can't believe that so many people accept and even require silly protocol such as "i & You" but actually want to argue over a FemDom telling her sub to clean up his language. A gentleman does not use vulgarities in front of a lady. Period. It's just manners. The entire point of having 'manners' is to show respect for the people around you. You do not chew with your mouth open at a holiday dinner. You do not pass gas in close quarters. You do not pick your nose when talking to your boss. You don't move your bowels with the door open. You don't swear to your Domme, especially when she tells you not to. There are just some things that people should know better than to do. As my mother used to say to us "Watch that mouth our I'll slap it off your face." Same applies here.

sirsholly -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 4:11:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze quote: ORIGINAL: Politesub53 quote: ORIGINAL: shymetalsub I really do find the idea that cursing is harmful and disrespectful to be dated and a little silly. Consider this then, what impression do you think this comment has given any woman reading it about you ? No disrespect, but it sounds as if you are refusing to make an effort with a few manners. I seriously would not appreciate to hear cursing in a nice restaurant and if I would take the kids of some friends out, I would also not like them to be exposed to that kind of language. Nothing wrong with cussing with your mates, only keep it so much in check that you are able to switch it off and F is not part of your normal vocabulary. If someone uses blue language in a public arena, with children present, i would LOUDLY explain to the kids that the speaker is a classic example of a poorly raised, uneducated bozo.

PeonForHer -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 4:15:44 AM)
I'm with the OP on this, and most especially when making initial approaches. For me, D/s is no different to vanilla relationships in one important respect: that one needs to use one's best manners and most courtly modes of speech with a prospective partner. The language of romance needs to be crafted as beautifully and elegantly as one can make it. It beats the hot runny crap out of me why people can't understand that.

LadyLou -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 4:29:34 AM)
There is a part of me that thinks it is somewhat prudish when people take such dislike to general, non specific cussing; they are, after all, only words. But, I also do not like to hear excessive pointless cussing as well. When I hear people talk in excessive expletives for no good reason, I can't help but come to the conclusion that the said person has a problem and articulating their thoughts, and is rather petulant. That said, I swear too f'ing much. Lol. But, to swear in text, for me at least, really would take effort to do so, even when writing in a stream-of-consciousness type way. When one writes, there is extra time and thought going into what is being written. So, if there is excessive cussing, then that person is either completely clueless as to the impression they are making, or they are going out of their way to 'posture'. I would find neither particularly impressive. I also feel swearing excessively knocks the poignancy (and point) out of cussing. A solitary, and well placed expletive is far more satisfying and effective than a continuous barrage of cuss words. I personal would take offence at his “modesty is not for dominant women like yourself” assertion. I would be tempted throw a similarly offensive-manipulative assertion back at him along the lines of 'swearing like a petulant Neanderthal is not for graceful, well tempered, intelligent sub males, with self control.... like yourself', but it's probably not worth it. Just consider it part of the vetting process, and put it down to a incompatible temperaments. Regardless of sub/Dom orientation, if one can't be courteous enough uphold a simple request like toning down the cussing a bit, the man just lacks basic manners.

lobodomslavery -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 4:53:32 AM)
would you really slap a grown guy's face for cursing. i mean come on dont we live in the 21st century not the 18th and he is an adult kevin

MsStarlett -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 5:01:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery would you really slap a grown guy's face for cursing. i mean come on dont we live in the 21st century not the 18th and he is an adult kevin Yes. I would if he ignored the warning. You may ask my best boy WestPet if you don't believe that my favorite form of 'instant correction' isn't a good, firm slap to the face. It brings a man dramatically back on focus. It is painful and humiliating at the same time. It leaves the receiver in a mild case of shock for a moment. That gives him time to reflect on what he did wrong and gives him a stern reminder not to do that thing again.

lobodomslavery -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 5:21:16 AM)
and what if , you know people deal with shock in different ways, so what if as a way of dealing with his shock he slapped you back, you ll understand he did not mean to do it, it just happened, like i say a reflex action, like could it become a slapping game then, You slap me, i slap you, You slap me , i slap you, a bit like a pantomine, would You regard that as ok, has this ever happened to You, and how would You react if it did kevin

Politesub53 -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 5:27:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery would you really slap a grown guy's face for cursing. i mean come on dont we live in the 21st century not the 18th and he is an adult kevin So why are we here Kevin ? This is a forum for submissives and Dominants to meet. Therefore, if a Dominant requires me not to swear, or whatever, that is fine. If She decides to punish me, then that is also fine. The slap itself is just a means of punishment. It is simple to me, if a guy identifies as a submissive, he should act accordingly. It amazes me why people dont grasp this simple concept.

lusciouslips19 -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 5:30:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze quote: ORIGINAL: lovingpet I didn't appreciate it in Carlin or other comics either. When I have something to say, I can say it and rarely ever resort to such words. It takes effort and disipline sometimes to do so, but I don't even remotely consider it dishonest. I have taken great care and pains to express something in a much fuller context than the off the cuff expletive can ever do, so that is not to be taken as some minor thing. There are a lot of folks who know when I would have cussed if I spoke the way they do and really do appreciate me transcending that. It is a matter of better communication, not that one is any more honest than another. Habits and a part of an overall personality are no excuse. lovingpet Sometimes a loud F..... is actually the perfect expression. I used that repeatedly when my wallet with passport and all cards was stolen This is so true. But if its every other word, It loses its punch. Its just annoying then and a sign of bad manners and lack of whats known as proper breeding( though I dont like that term). One must learn to control certain things.

lobodomslavery -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 5:32:00 AM)
well cursing i think is pretty minor. if you slap a guy for cursing, what do you do if a sub say screams at his Dominant or calls her names. i mean if you call someone names you deserve a good slap yes, but just for letting out an odd F , i think thats a bit draconian just my view though, kevin

lusciouslips19 -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 5:35:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: shymetalsub His lack of taking note of your request, says more about him than his above average command of English ever can, Ma`am. quote: Please do not mistake me for trolling or flaming but hardly ever in my life have I disagreed with anything more than I disagree with this. Submissive men are not machines. They're not perfect in their ability to obey, nor are they perfect in any other regard, because they're people. When I briefly experimented with D/s with my ex before we broke up, I found myself utterly disobedient and unable to comply with two or three requests. One example was her order to buy non-black clothes. There's just this odd thing I had for black at the time, I got extremely anxious in any other color. And if she had wanted me to tone down the cursing, I probably would have reluctantly tried to obey and failed repeatedly force of habit!. There are so few truly articulate people out there. If you find one of them and dwell on a few particular words you don't like (especially words with no truly harmful implications), you're missing the big picture. Most intelligent people are opinionated, and even a bit stubborn. While I realize this could get in the way of the whole submission thing to some extent, all I'm saying is that people who are well spoken should be appreciated for what they have to say, and I would take a brilliant foul mouthed domme over a polite dumby any day of the week. I appreciate your honesty. However, i think you are fighting for this because you see yourself in this person. The fact of the matter is if you seek a Domme in your life I can tell you that most will not give you a second look if you are crass. If you dont know how to spell that will set many off too. Being a submissive is about submitting to the requests and demands of another. So if one cant even clean up their act what does that say about their submission?

SoulPiercer -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 5:42:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MsFlutter Heck, modesty is not for Dominant Woman like Yourself .... I agree with shymetalsub. This part bothers me. Should one cast modesty aside just because one is dominant? It sounds to me as though he is discounting your wishes and opinion. He's moved beyond negotiating and straight into seizing control. He's telling you this is how it is, take it or leave it. I'd suggest you leave it. I've said before, a dominant woman can step outside her front door, throw a stick and hit a submissive man in the nose. While I can be pretty foul mouthed or foul emailed .. I would honor a request to clean it up, whether that request came from another dominant or a submissive.

FloridaMistresse -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 5:51:48 AM)
My initial response is this: he is wasting your time, he is not submissive, but just looking for attention and clearly not into pleasing you, so with all of the fabulous respectful, pleasing submissives, why would you waste one more key stroke on this idiot? Other than to block him! On profanity. It is simple, if you choose not to accept it in your submissives and you have declared that to them, then that is the end of the conversation. Your Dominance therefore your rules. If its a vanilla setting then I think those that use profanity should be aware that they might be making a non user uncomfortable and filter their choices of words. Do I swear, yes sometimes I do. Do I allow My slaves to curse; Um NO LOL and if they do, there are certainly repercussions, if they continue to ignore My rule then they are dismissed. This is a lifestyle and one based on likes and dislikes if you want to break it down to a rudimentary form. Simply choose to spend your time with someone that has the same dogma as you, that seeks to please you. I personally now of many wonderful, pleasing, respectful submisives, male and female. There are literally thousands on here to choose from......... choose wisely and listen to your red flags. Actually that would be My advice to both Tops & bottoms..........

PeonForHer -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 6:03:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Politesub53 quote: ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery would you really slap a grown guy's face for cursing. i mean come on dont we live in the 21st century not the 18th and he is an adult kevin So why are we here Kevin ? This is a forum for submissives and Dominants to meet. Therefore, if a Dominant requires me not to swear, or whatever, that is fine. If She decides to punish me, then that is also fine. The slap itself is just a means of punishment. It is simple to me, if a guy identifies as a submissive, he should act accordingly. It amazes me why people dont grasp this simple concept. Indeed. And most especially so at the outset. Most commonly ignored command: "read my profile fully first"

MsFlutter -> RE: Asking too much to clean up the language? (11/15/2008 6:04:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MsFlutter I'd like a general reaction to an email conversation I had with a sub male. Despite his above-average command of the English language, his emails were peppered with unnecessarily salty language - his favorite being '8sshole'. I diplomatically suggested that emails were always easier to read when they contained something other than 4 letter words. His response follows below: ....Unfortunately You will see those words in the mails i send You. Hell, they're coming from me, and what a big one i am lol - a, stubborn as one as well. Heck, modesty is not for Dominant Woman like Yourself .... I wanted to avoid influencing any conclusions and the feedback has been very interesting. I was a bit frosted by the arrogance of 'modesty is not for Dominant Women like Yourself.' I refrained from commenting on it as I wanted to see if others noticed it. I'm not thin-skinned and I've used my fair share of four-letter words. Refusing to even consider my 'request' to dial back on the profanity told me a great deal about the person. Happily, my involvement was about answering some questions for him, not an interview. Any interview would have ended right there! My own reactions ranged from "How wude !" to "thank god he's not my sub or I'd have to really school him - or release him back into the wild.' I feel much better because now I know its not just me. Thank you for all your insights !

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