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RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:28:31 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Using fast reply.........I've really got nothing constructive to add because people alot smarter, with way more experience, are putting some really great stuff in here.

This is one of those threads that ALL really would benefit from reading. Educational and thought provoking, at least for me.

Thank you Erin, for creating it!


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:29:03 AM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline 		Hehe... as LA pointed out, you don't have to be just one and probably nobody is.  Instead submissives are various combinations of the different orientations to different degrees.  A submissive might express strong tendancies in two orientations and weak tendancies in others... or strong in one in moderate in all others... or moderate in one and weak in all others, etc.  That's just part of the complexity of people.

So you could be a slutty masochistic service submissive

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:29:59 AM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline 		oooo...im so getting a tee shirt.

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to Padriag)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:35:44 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: persephonee

oooo...im so getting a tee shirt.


I am getting a pail of cold water..... thought about a warm pail.... but..... well... I didn't see the internal reward with that one

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:39:37 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: persephonee

oooo...im so getting a tee shirt.


I am getting a pail of cold water..... thought about a warm pail.... but..... well... I didn't see the internal reward with that one


ooooooooo can I help???

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:42:04 AM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline 		....this girl isnt in charge of choosing the temperature of the water, Sir.

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:42:54 AM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline
quote:

Oh and your dinner example....I have a really hard time getting through any function where some people are serving or working to make everyone else comfortable....and I'm not one of the "active" ones.

Sounds like service oriented thinking to me.



_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:47:47 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

ooooooooo can I help???


oh sure.... you can stand beside perse and hold her hand so she doesn't run away........ * gets a better pail of cold water**

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:49:11 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

ooooooooo can I help???


oh sure.... you can stand beside perse and hold her hand so she doesn't run away........ * gets a better pail of cold water**


I guess I shoulda seen that coming huh???

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:49:58 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin
I guess I shoulda seen that coming huh???


um yeah   lol

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:50:40 AM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

quote:

Oh and your dinner example....I have a really hard time getting through any function where some people are serving or working to make everyone else comfortable....and I'm not one of the "active" ones.

Sounds like service oriented thinking to me.




And to get back on track...(*grabs a towel to cover her wet, clingy teeshirt...*)
i am finding it more and more these days that the things that i do on a daily basis as just a matter of course, actually have names and catagories and distinctions....if im not careful, ill end up boxing myself in...in a life where i have hopped the fences holding me in all along.

i had no concept that my desire to and acting out the desire to...pitch in was or was not service oriented...it was just the way i like to do things if im in a position to choose how i act.
And the only reason i dont think more people dont stay after and clean or pitch in has little to do with their level of service orientation...and more to do with the same reason why i wont break into the kitchen at a restaurant and knock the dishwasher over to get at the sinkful of dishes...they just consider the dungeon to be a business more than a family...or whatever their motive might be...

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to Icarys)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:52:23 AM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

ooooooooo can I help???


oh sure.... you can stand beside perse and hold her hand so she doesn't run away........ * gets a better pail of cold water**


I guess I shoulda seen that coming huh???


*hands on her hips in a Mae West sorta way*
You all realize that im going to get the blame for this thread derailing...and all i did was....show up.

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:54:08 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: persephonee
You all realize that im going to get the blame for this thread derailing...and all i did was....show up.


thats cause your an "attentionwhore oriented submissive"

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 8:56:39 AM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline 		you forgot suhlut.

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 9:01:47 AM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: persephonee

i am finding it more and more these days that the things that i do on a daily basis as just a matter of course, actually have names and catagories and distinctions....if im not careful, ill end up boxing myself in...in a life where i have hopped the fences holding me in all along.

Don't think of them as boxes.  Think of them as chapter headings in a book.  We divide a book into chapters because its a way of organizing the information, making it easier to reference certain portions.  It doesn't stop the book from being a book.

People are like those books... and these distinctions are just chapter headings, helping us mark and reference information about those people.  But they are still whole books.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 9:02:49 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: persephonee

you forgot suhlut.


well... I was trying not to be rude.... that is such a personal label of identification that you might think of me too forward for using it.  After all... I am trying to be a gentleman here.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 9:07:47 AM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline 		this girl thanks Sir for his gentlemanly ways....now, do you know where i tossed my panties? *looks around scratching her head*

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 9:08:16 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
I am trying to be a gentleman here.


I must say, my eyebrows just shot up about 2 inches.....never mind the snort laugh that escaped.

KoM, a gentleman.......who knew!!


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 9:15:18 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		Fast Reply~

I've often seen Dommes state that they are looking for service oriented submissives. Many of them further define that as someone who is not looking to have their sexual fantasies fulfilled. Do dommes use this term differently???

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Service Oriented Submissive - 11/25/2008 9:16:38 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: persephonee


And to get back on track...(*grabs a towel to cover her wet, clingy teeshirt...*)
i am finding it more and more these days that the things that i do on a daily basis as just a matter of course, actually have names and catagories and distinctions....if im not careful, ill end up boxing myself in...in a life where i have hopped the fences holding me in all along.



The only way you box yourself in is if you choose to allow yourself to be boxed in.  Just don't allow it!  and as such.. don't allow yourself to box in others either.   Just because a person says they are a service oriented submissive doesn't mean to me that they are just in that box.  People are alot more complex than that.  I think Padriag's idea of a book is a very good idea.  All these label identifications are but a chapter in a very large book... and that book being us.  Too often we judge the book by it's cover... and that is often a mistake.  Sometimes we find one chapter and that does it or ruins the book for us.. but yet there is so many other chapters to read and learn.  One of the joys I have found in my relationships with Alandra and Kyra is learning all those chapters.  They are just not my slave... even though that might be an incredible chapter to me.  There is so much more to them....  I think that is the best part of having an intimate relationship is learning all those chapters... and they getting to learn more about me as well.   There is something extremely empowering about it all.  I think we would enjoy others in our life that we can share our selves with just as they can share themselves with us.   Unfortunately... there is so much focus on finding that book that has that one chapter... people forget that we are more than our cover and more than just one or two chapters.   Every now and again, I recieve an email from someone that shares a part of themselves with me.  I treasure these things and find that I often would like to know more.  I find the more they share... the more I want to know.   Just don't let yourself or anyone put you in a box... if they insist... move on to some people that an better appeciate "YOU" and not the box they like you in.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 60
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