RainydayNE
Posts: 978
Joined: 10/21/2008 Status: offline
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it sounds like you'e really upset about something, which sucks majorly. and i hope you feel better after a good night's rest *hugs* but this KINDA reminds me of that thread about "switch prejudice" a little while ago. and it's as unfair for you to judge people for their preferences as it is for people to judge you for who you are. my personal belief on the trans thing is that there ARE indeed sometimes people born in the "wrong body," and they feel like they can't live the right way until their out of it. i've met some really great people who were trans and i'd never fault them for being that way. and liike 80% of the time, i totally agree with them =p they ARE in the wrong body. i think it's something that happens early on, since we all essentially start out female and with the addition of certain quantities of certain hormones, an embryo becomes male. however, the problem that alot of people have is that they get LIED TO. there are some trans people who AREN'T honest about it, for good or for bad. and people need the verification as the only means of hopefully protecting themselves. like resident sadist said, some people want to have kids and want a genetic female that could indeed have kids or a genetic male who can help them assemble them. =p sometimes it's as simple as that. and he's also right in the assertion that people can't be expected to give up procreation to avoid stepping on toes. and for the others, for whatever reason, they just don't want to deal with trans issues. and i've got no direct experience with it, but the issues can be quite complicated. especially if you're still in the process of your transformation. "am i going to be expected to help pay for these expensive surgeries?" etc etc plus, alot of people here DO seem to get harassed for money alot =p and they may see a person in the middle of the series of operations looking for someone to pay for them. it's cynical, maybe, but it happens. asking for verification IS about developing trust. you really shouldn't automatically trust anyone (especially online) or expect them to automatically trust you. trust should be given when there's clear reason to give it. i came here taken by my Dom so the whole "dating" side of this place isn't important to me, but i'm pretty sure EVERYONE asks verification of everyone else, regardless of if they are genetically male/female, or whatever. because truth be told, any number of people could be something other than what they claim. it's easy to steal photos off the internet, especially now in the myspace world (i've had that happen to me =p). from alot of the posts here that i've read, verification of some sort is part of the process between any two people. now, in your message you said in effect "do you realise that this person has jumped through hoops to be with you," but in reality, you jumped through those hoops for YOURSELF. you felt your body was wrong, you changed your body. you sacrificed your family, friends, whoever wasn't understanding of your process and need to undertake it. that had nothing to do with the people you may or may not meet later in life. as far as i know, there wasn't a Dom/me holding a gun to your back making you sign papers and pay for operations and go to the hospital. and honestly, alot of those bad feelings will go away when you do realise that, at the end of the day, you did this for you, so that you could fully be who you believe you are. your dream of being the perfect submissive isn't shot into the ground, just postponed like E2Sweet said. when you find someone who understands you, it'll be even more rewarding after all the mess you've gone through to find that person. and that's how it is for everyone in life. we all have crappy dating experiences, people not liking us for what's on the inside, only focused on the outside, etc etc. This stuff happens to everyone. But finding someone who truly accepts you is more of a reward. If everything were always easy, what would be the point of anything?
< Message edited by RainydayNE -- 11/26/2008 5:26:16 AM >
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