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RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 11:32:49 AM   
Coupleofwhats


Posts: 280
Joined: 6/4/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

150 an hour for a pro domme is already a little on the cheap side... especially if she has her own dungeon. Trust me, the market still exists.



I don't know anyone who has a tribute that low. If it came to that, they might as well just get a conventional job, for the benefits.

It's weird that so many people are covinced that the economy has killed Pro Domination (wishful thinking?) Not every client works in finance! Actually, there are a lot of lawyers: and some of them are making a KILLING right now.

I guess maybe solidly middle class men with dependent children and such might pull back. But I doubt they were really contributing all that much to anyone's income to start with anyway.







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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 12:11:39 PM   
dominalisa


Posts: 129
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: azjojoba
Here is the reality -- on the web there are two types of women who are dominant -- pros and the 24/7 femdoms who want you to marry them so that you will have to support them financially.


Wrong. I don't fit into your narrowminded view. I'm a single, lifestyle (non-pro) dominant Woman who is not looking for marriage or someone to financially support her. I am successful and make more money than most men I know.

And to me, there's two types of men:
-Gentlemen with integrity, good character, honesty, loyalty, unselfishness, respectfulness and intelligence
-and those who aren't that.

(in reply to azjojoba)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 12:21:16 PM   
TexasMaam


Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline 		I found a Barbie Doll in a really cool bustier and boots, whip in hand, for sale on Ebay.

She sits on my bookshelf next to my skillpath CD on how to deal with diverse and difficult people.

She wasn't too expensive, she's real, and you wouldn't have to keep putting out any cash just to look at her on your knees in your underwear.

TM

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 12:23:03 PM   
Misstoyou


Posts: 1149
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: azjojoba

... and the 24/7 femdoms who want you to marry them so that you will have to support them financially...




Too funny!! (...though of course I don't fall into the under 30 demographics )


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a.k.a. "mean Lady"


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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 12:40:01 PM   
DrkJourney


Posts: 1917
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: azjojoba
Does anyone have any suggestions on how and where I can find a Mistress Here is the reality -- on the web there are two types of women who are dominant -- pros and the 24/7 femdoms who want you to marry them so that you will have to support them financially.

Most of the pros are under the age of 30, and most of the 24/7 are over.

In answer to your question: you won't find what you are looking for here unless you want to be a john or a 24/7 total slave. If you choose the slave route you will probably never have sex because you will wear a chastity belt and your mistress will probably be a bitch that hates everything about men except the money they earn.


wow....bitter much?....lol

I am over 30....and I am a lifestyle Domme, always have been, since I was 20.  As far as wanting someone to marry for his money...I can take care of myself, always have.   Besides, most of they guys I run into make less than I do or they are "employment-ly challenged".  

I want a mate who I can share not only D/s with but vanilla things as well...not necessarily scoping for a husband, but if he appears I'm certainly not going to turn him away.   And from my past experience, I'll probably still make more than he does.



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(in reply to azjojoba)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 12:44:49 PM   
azjojoba


Posts: 513
Joined: 2/1/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dominalisa

Wrong. I don't fit into your narrowminded view. I'm a single, lifestyle (non-pro) dominant Woman who is not looking for marriage or someone to financially support her. I am successful and make more money than most men I know.

And to me, there's two types of men:
-Gentlemen with integrity, good character, honesty, loyalty, unselfishness, respectfulness and intelligence
-and those who aren't that.



I think you fit rather closely with what I said, although you are a few years older than most pros. You are getting up their so I applaud you as a success story. At a certain point you will find that the under 30's start to crowd your business.

Like your website.

(in reply to dominalisa)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 12:51:14 PM   
azjojoba


Posts: 513
Joined: 2/1/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

150 an hour for a pro domme is already a little on the cheap side... especially if she has her own dungeon. Trust me, the market still exists.



I'm sure their are still plenty of guys that are willing to pay for your services, but the number those that can pay that much will dwindle. If you haven't seen any changes you are lucky indeed. Men just aren't going to have the money to spend on luxuries like expensive women.

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 12:51:37 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DrkJourney

quote:

ORIGINAL: azjojoba
Does anyone have any suggestions on how and where I can find a Mistress Here is the reality -- on the web there are two types of women who are dominant -- pros and the 24/7 femdoms who want you to marry them so that you will have to support them financially.

Most of the pros are under the age of 30, and most of the 24/7 are over.

In answer to your question: you won't find what you are looking for here unless you want to be a john or a 24/7 total slave. If you choose the slave route you will probably never have sex because you will wear a chastity belt and your mistress will probably be a bitch that hates everything about men except the money they earn.


wow....bitter much?....lol

I am over 30....and I am a lifestyle Domme, always have been, since I was 20.  As far as wanting someone to marry for his money...I can take care of myself, always have.   Besides, most of they guys I run into make less than I do or they are "employment-ly challenged".  

I want a mate who I can share not only D/s with but vanilla things as well...not necessarily scoping for a husband, but if he appears I'm certainly not going to turn him away.   And from my past experience, I'll probably still make more than he does.




I have found that many lifestyle femdoms have higher earning potential than men the same age, and when subs realize no amount of money can "buy" their affections, they develop an attitude like azjojoba - it's a combination of fear, resentment and jealousy.  They like to believe that beautiful, successful femdoms can *always* be bought, whether through booking a session at the dungeon or playing the role of sugar daddy. When they come across a woman who earns her own money with a successful career, AND is kinky as hell and can have her pick of men, these guys get really bitter and you have seen the result. At the heart of it is rejection and the fact they cannot attain these women.

I think naturally born femdoms are intuitive, resourceful and tenacious - and they bring that zest to their line of work.  It's also why there are SO MANY good pro femdoms who earn a living or supplement a living by being a self-made boss - those who own their own companies know that this is no easy task and takes a certain skill set, as well as legal and accounting strengths.  Femdoms who do not choose to become pro femdoms often have very successful careers and so many are self-made and run their own small businesses, like me. Businesses that have nothing to do with kink.

I have not met a male submissive who makes more money than I do.  I'm sure they exist, but it doesn't matter, money never attracted me anyway.  I feel that earning the money is my preferred role, with a man playing the role of supporter.  It also makes for much better sex, since he's never tired from working full time.

Akasha


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(in reply to DrkJourney)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 12:59:43 PM   
azjojoba


Posts: 513
Joined: 2/1/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Coupleofwhats

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

150 an hour for a pro domme is already a little on the cheap side... especially if she has her own dungeon. Trust me, the market still exists.



I don't know anyone who has a tribute that low. If it came to that, they might as well just get a conventional job, for the benefits.

It's weird that so many people are covinced that the economy has killed Pro Domination (wishful thinking?) Not every client works in finance! Actually, there are a lot of lawyers: and some of them are making a KILLING right now.

I guess maybe solidly middle class men with dependent children and such might pull back. But I doubt they were really contributing all that much to anyone's income to start with anyway.



You are so cute I'm sure you would have no problem finding men to pay.

Those lawyers and other high-paid men you are talking about are losing their jobs by the thousands. It's simply not possible that pro dommes who are expensive aren't seeing a drop off of business. Do you think the managers at Circuit City that are now unemployed are going to pay $200 to get spanked? Or how about Citibank high-rollers?

(in reply to Coupleofwhats)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 1:13:39 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: azjojoba

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

150 an hour for a pro domme is already a little on the cheap side... especially if she has her own dungeon. Trust me, the market still exists.



I'm sure their are still plenty of guys that are willing to pay for your services, but the number those that can pay that much will dwindle. If you haven't seen any changes you are lucky indeed. Men just aren't going to have the money to spend on luxuries like expensive women.



Business has gone up.... why are you trying to lecture people on a profession that know nothing about?


< Message edited by Lynnxz -- 11/30/2008 1:14:41 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 1:15:05 PM   
AlexandraLynch


Posts: 778
Joined: 3/24/2008
Status: offline 		Definitely you need to work out what it is that you actually want out of a relationship with a female dominant. Might you be able to find a friend in the lifestyle who periodically likes to scene with you? Sure. For that matter, I have a couple friends I do that with when everyone's interested, as does my husband. But you need to work out what you want and how to communicate that in an aboveboard and straightforward manner. Quite frankly, us girls who are dominant and aren't pros can find a TON of guys who want to be worked over for a few hours, but don't want to pay for it. I sometimes do some functional barter with my friends. "I wouldn't have time Saturday, we're in the middle of working to get the holiday baking done to mail out...but if you come over and help prep and clean up so I can get it done faster and with less stress, I could." "Hmm... I could probably rearrange my time...but since you build your own computers, could you spend some time figuring out what the hell is up with my laptop sometime this week?" You have to give something to get, and being willing to be spanked lightly is not all that exceptional.

(in reply to yourMissTress)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 10:26:03 PM   
Dalanius


Posts: 10
Joined: 11/30/2008
Status: offline 		yourMistress's reply is on target.  I don't mean to be mean here, but if you are looking for such an attractive femdom, you have to be honest with yourself here.  By your own admission, your financial capabilities are limited.  In addition, as clear from your pic, you are not among the top ten percent of lookers (sorry).  So ask yourself than what you would have to offer an attractive dominant woman?  You need to be realistic.  On the one hand you have a want to be dominated but wanting to meet the femdom of your dreams for free.  It is just not going to happen.  Your predictament is why there are virtually all the pro-dommes you are bemoaning existing.  They are not the ones with clearly limited opportunities and have to settle in this dynamic.  You are.  And that settlement will come at a cost for you--literally--if you want the model wtih a whip, or you readjusting your expectations in a more realistic manner.  Good luck. 

(in reply to scvslave)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 11/30/2008 11:00:34 PM   
azjojoba


Posts: 513
Joined: 2/1/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

150 an hour for a pro domme is already a little on the cheap side... especially if she has her own dungeon. Trust me, the market still exists.



$150 is cheap??? Sure, pro dommes can charge whatever they want, but they won't be a pro for long if they get no business.

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 12/1/2008 12:53:03 AM   
DelilahDeb


Posts: 429
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline 		to the OP:

  • A. "Conservative family guy" tells me that you are closeted, and therefor unwilling or unable to go to public events such as munches and "public" dungeons, clubs, or fetish nights. (If you're in the closet, then what are you doing with your face up on here?)
  • B. "Master to my slave wife" tells me that you are dominant in your primary relationship. Which leads me to believe that you are not submissive, merely masochistic in your non-marital kinky "adventures."
  • C. "Need to submit to sexy domme" tells me that you have your own image (probably very like the unrealistic, not to say artificial, sort of woman that appears in kinky porn) of a "domme". More to the point, I feel sure that you…

    • First, want some hot, svelte, fetish-dressed domina who will at least provide you with anal orgasms, with or without any other sort. Of course, the "hot" and "svelte" parts ensure that you will face more than usual competition for anyone that might possibly match your ideals.
    • Second, you want her to tie you up, blindfold you, torment your dangly bits, invade your ass, and allow you to play with her tits…but, of course, you being the conservative family guy you are, this must all be done on the QT. (It's called professional confidence. One of many reasons pros are pros, or they don't stay pro long.)
    • Third, I don't hear anything about what sort of "service" you might be willing to do for any domina. Toys must be cleaned and sanitized, dungeons must be dusted and vacuumed or mopped or both, sheets and towels must be laundered, just to name a few basic chores. Gloves and condoms and lube are not free. Neither is time. Yours, or mine. (It doesn't arise; I'm more than a thousand miles away, thank goddess.)

  • D. (or should I say, F, for flunk?) Your profile specifically states that you hate "swinging". Which makes you out to be a bald-faced hypocrite.


Lady Delilah Deb

P.s. A pro domme in L.A. who only charges $150 an hour has already taken the present economic conditions into account. In that part of the world, I'd expect that the December 2007 rate was $200–300 and up.

_____________________________

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--from the Charge of the Goddess, a Wiccan teaching

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 12/1/2008 3:42:55 AM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: azjojoba

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

150 an hour for a pro domme is already a little on the cheap side... especially if she has her own dungeon. Trust me, the market still exists.



$150 is cheap??? Sure, pro dommes can charge whatever they want, but they won't be a pro for long if they get no business.



150 is extraordinarily cheap... like... "it's not gonna happen" cheap, at least around this area.

It has not affected my business, or the business of others who work around me.

Again, why are you lecturing people on a profession you clearly know nothing about?


_____________________________

HBIC



(in reply to azjojoba)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 12/1/2008 4:47:11 AM   
azjojoba


Posts: 513
Joined: 2/1/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

150 is extraordinarily cheap... like... "it's not gonna happen" cheap, at least around this area.

It has not affected my business, or the business of others who work around me.

Again, why are you lecturing people on a profession you clearly know nothing about?



Baby doll, I love your pictures. You are incredibly sexy and you know how to pose. The only thing I would lecture you on is that I think you should show us in that librarian outfit. That would be mega hot and would probably land you some more business.

If I had the money I would pay you anything you wanted. Oh well, I don't live in your area and I'm sure I can't afford you. Good luck in whatever you do!

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 12/1/2008 6:30:46 AM   
MsFlutter


Posts: 1305
Joined: 11/12/2008
From: East Coast
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slavekal

I recently wrote a book for guys on how to meet a Mistress.  Yes, I do want to sell books.  But I really think that the tips and advice in my book will help.  Everything in it has worked for me and other guys that I have known.  You can get it here.   http://www.lulu.com/content/5043162


I bought the book (I love insight). I read the book. I LOVED the book. Its conversational, warm, written from the heart, funny at times and always incredibly down to earth.  I give it five paddles! 

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 12/1/2008 7:20:11 AM   
SteveAndJaz


Posts: 151
Joined: 11/22/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

150 an hour for a pro domme is already a little on the cheap side... especially if she has her own dungeon. Trust me, the market still exists.



Jaz says ... I agree with that. Its going to be at least twice that in the UK and the UK market just keeps going

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 12/1/2008 7:59:09 AM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: azjojoba

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

150 is extraordinarily cheap... like... "it's not gonna happen" cheap, at least around this area.

It has not affected my business, or the business of others who work around me.

Again, why are you lecturing people on a profession you clearly know nothing about?



Baby doll, I love your pictures. You are incredibly sexy and you know how to pose. The only thing I would lecture you on is that I think you should show us in that librarian outfit. That would be mega hot and would probably land you some more business.

If I had the money I would pay you anything you wanted. Oh well, I don't live in your area and I'm sure I can't afford you. Good luck in whatever you do!



*head desk*

This is why we can't have nice things.


_____________________________

HBIC



(in reply to azjojoba)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: RT Mistresses versus Pro Dommes - 12/1/2008 11:39:45 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dalanius

yourMistress's reply is on target.  I don't mean to be mean here, but if you are looking for such an attractive femdom, you have to be honest with yourself here.  By your own admission, your financial capabilities are limited.  In addition, as clear from your pic, you are not among the top ten percent of lookers (sorry).  So ask yourself than what you would have to offer an attractive dominant woman?  You need to be realistic.  On the one hand you have a want to be dominated but wanting to meet the femdom of your dreams for free.  It is just not going to happen.  Your predictament is why there are virtually all the pro-dommes you are bemoaning existing.  They are not the ones with clearly limited opportunities and have to settle in this dynamic.  You are.  And that settlement will come at a cost for you--literally--if you want the model wtih a whip, or you readjusting your expectations in a more realistic manner.  Good luck. 


Most of the dominant women I know could care less if the sub is among the top ten percent of lookers. They tend to look deeper into a person than that.

_____________________________

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This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to Dalanius)
Profile   Post #: 40
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