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Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 5:54:10 AM   
belovedfairy


Posts: 9
Joined: 7/10/2008
Status: offline 		I was just wondering...esp if new and have never been owned; but I would also like to hear from those who ARE owned and long in the lifestyle...
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RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 6:12:18 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness?


no.
it would be the same thing as having doubts that this slave's hair is red or that she is 42.

(in reply to belovedfairy)
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RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 6:13:43 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		I never have doubts.  I also don't tend to analyze things.  I just accept and enjoy the feelings I get without wondering about the hows and whys.   Submissive type my entire life, actively pursuing for the past three years or so.

_____________________________



(in reply to belovedfairy)
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RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 6:17:04 AM   
Phoenixpower


Posts: 8098
Status: offline 		No  Still some aspects needs maybe more defined...or more explored *lol*...but overall I do know pretty well who I am

(in reply to Aileen1968)
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RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 6:21:26 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		I have never doubted who I am.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to belovedfairy)
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RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 6:22:49 AM   
daddysprop247


Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
Status: offline 		nope.

(in reply to IrishMist)
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RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 6:31:17 AM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: belovedfairy

I was just wondering...esp if new and have never been owned; but I would also like to hear from those who ARE owned and long in the lifestyle...



No. I already know that I'm not submissive but I chose to be a relationship with a control aspect. You don't have to be innately submissive to be owned but you do have to be able to submit your will where required.

agirl




(in reply to belovedfairy)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 6:44:47 AM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline 		Yes.

For about two months (maybe a little less) after my former owner let me go, I did not feel submissive, did not want to feel submissive, and did not want to be submissive.

I am still not as I used to be. Prior to knowing my former owner I was submissive to just about every and any male. Now it would take someone very special for me to submit to. I am seeing someone now and the dynamic is much different than my past experiences. But I do feel my submission with him. It scares me sometimes, since I am still processing the last situation. But there is no more doubt that it (my submission) exists.

_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to belovedfairy)
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RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 6:48:20 AM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		I am still pretty new to all this.  I feel like I have found something that I have always had, but never had a term for, nor a proper outlet.  I questioned it when I finally came to understand what it was...but from the point of understanding and acceptance of that aspect of my person, no I have not.  Not yet at least.  

_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to NuevaVida)
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RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 7:07:48 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		*Laughs*  Wow, tough question.  My wife has doubts ALL the time about the word submissive.  I havent' observed any of that to stop her from doing all those things that one normally might call submissive behaviors... obeying me, kneeling, seeking to please me, etc.   In a lot of ways, my wfie reminds thoughts on it all remind me somewhat of agirl's... a very practical and pragmatic viewpoint on it all.

I don't really have doubts about my dominance... but sometimes I do wonder whether being her Master is what I want.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to belovedfairy)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 7:12:39 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Sometimes.
It is difficult (for me) to be in a long term relationship, and to keep that dynamic up at all times. Especially when I want to kill him. (I'm just sayin'...) *g*
But, I do know what I feel and what I am drawn to, as well.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to leadership527)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 8:43:58 AM   
housesub4you


Posts: 1879
Joined: 4/2/2008
Status: offline 		I went through a period where I tried being a something other than a sub and it just did not work out for me.  I'm glad I looked into the other roles and realized where I was happiest.

Now I have no doubts and I think the experience has made me a better sub. 

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 8:50:51 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		No i never doubted i am a submissive.  I always have been one.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to housesub4you)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 9:12:53 AM   
WalterRego


Posts: 276
Joined: 12/28/2004
Status: offline 		Sometimes I question whether the things I have done or ways I have acted are consistent with being submissive. I know I am happiest in a submissive position, that I like someone else in charge, that I like rules and being held to them. I know that I get  satisfaction pleasing others and am a happier and "better" person in that state. But then I act in ways which make me think my  lack of humility, or sense of self importance and ego are in conflict with those needs. At those times I have doubts about my submissiveness.

< Message edited by WalterRego -- 12/10/2008 9:15:20 AM >

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 9:53:05 AM   
Aszhrae


Posts: 1030
Joined: 3/31/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: belovedfairy

I was just wondering...esp if new and have never been owned; but I would also like to hear from those who ARE owned and long in the lifestyle...


No.
Mistress helped girl do a lot of healing over the years. Both mental and spiritual. It's my life to be submissive and to serve.

(in reply to belovedfairy)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 10:05:40 AM   
monywildcat


Posts: 452
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline 		While I don't doubt who or what I am, there have been moments where I have doubts that I am putting my all into the relationship.  I get a case of "oh crap, I should have done this, this, and that instead of remaining buried in my book" every now and then.  These moments however, have a way of motivating me to improve. 

_____________________________

Major Life Change Necessitates Personal Reinvention...

(in reply to Aszhrae)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 10:23:24 AM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline 		A lot of people look for someone to be submissive 'to'...a home of sorts for their submissive feelings.

It doesn't matter in the least whether I 'feel' submissive or not. I live in the type of relationship that demands it regardless of my feelings.

It makes sense to do what M says, that's been proven over many years before he owned me. Now, instead of him suggesting and advising, he can insist and enforce. The result of this is that I get to where I want to be a lot quicker.

agirl







(in reply to leadership527)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 11:05:48 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Are there times I don't want to do what he wants? Of course. I'd rather stay on the computer all night instead of going to bed without him. But usually I get over it. If there's a real problem I talk about it with him. He always listens to me, always takes my feelings into consideration, always treats me as a person of value.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to agirl)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 12:41:42 PM   
parakeet89


Posts: 94
Joined: 12/8/2008
Status: offline 		I'm new and have never been owned, and I've never seriously doubted it. I've doubted whether I can engage in a D/s relationship at this time, but I've never sat there and wondered whether this is truly who I am.

(in reply to belovedfairy)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Do you ever have doubts about your submissiveness? - 12/10/2008 12:58:53 PM   
VampiresLair


Posts: 1307
Joined: 9/3/2008
Status: offline 		I can't doubt my submissiveness, and any denial of that cold, hard fact would be...well...just a denial.

DV's Fox


_____________________________

Separately we are DiurnalVampire and DVsFox

10/18 Wedding date. 1 year and still blissfully happy

10/13/10 3 year anniversary of his becoming my Fox

Talk impolitely to me, baby - Thanks sunshinemiss



(in reply to parakeet89)
Profile   Post #: 20
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