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RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/17/2008 5:00:11 PM   
thornhappy


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Joined: 12/16/2006
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When I travel I usually pack everything in a backpack (the kind like a big bookbag.)

Last week at DFW I was talking to someone, standing near our gate, when I suddenly lost my balance and almost flipped backwards.  Maybe the gods were saying "too many books!"

I had some neurosurgery awhile ago that's affected how I figure out where my body is in space, and that's led to some interesting times in the grocery store.  Like running into people with my little hand basket, because I was looking at them and trying to talk at the same time. 

The all time career best was walking up to someone higher in my organization using a sidling motion, and bumping into him pretty hard.  Damn, I was embarassed.

thornhappy

(in reply to BlackPhx)
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RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/17/2008 11:17:16 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
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I wanted to wake Daddy up since I was impatient about him waking up and I was stroking his face and meowing at him, and he muttered stupid cat and went back to sleep.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Gwynssoftandshy

i realize that this kind of post isn't all that unusual, but it is usually fun, and most of the stories shared are about incidents that occur during scenes.  i thought it'd be nice to have one with stories about things that occur in our everyday lives, just flavored with our own brand of spice.  (If i'm not making sense, it's because i'm truly phenomenally tired today.  i've no idea why.)  So, i'll start us off.

This morning i overslept considerably.  My lady had allowed me to sleep in because, while i do ordinarily talk in my sleep and even move things around on occasion, i was particularly active last night.  Apparently every time she changed positions, shifted, or got up to use the facilities (and that was rather a lot since, in addition to being very patient, she's also extremely pregnant) i sat up in bed and asked her, "May i help you?  How can i help you?"  ~smiles~  Fortunately, i did also respond to her suggestions that i go back to sleep.

Would anyone else like to share?


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RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/17/2008 11:21:40 PM   
YourhandMyAss


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Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
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One day Daddy was leaving for work but  misplaced his keys, and we looked and we looked,  and we did check the bed, and no such luck and it's getting late he's frusterated and he's stressed out, and he has no money for a cab, so my dad drives him to work* we all live together* And then when he got home, he climbed into bed and low and behold He immediatly finds his keys, IN THE BED!

I don't know why we didn't find them before, cause we looked, but damn he felt so stupid and he felt guilty that my dad had to drop e verything an take him to work.


quote:

ORIGINAL: BitchGoddessD

Once I was at a store and my hands were full so I stuck my keys away.  When it was time to leave, I couldn't find my keys.  I checked my purse and pockets; I searched the store; I asked employees to help.  Finally I gave up and called my dad to come get me so I could get my spare set.  Mom and I were waiting on him when she asks me if I had stuck them in my bra.  Of course she was right.    Then I had to tell the employees to stop looking since I found them.  I ended up with having to tell them what I did.  Dad wasn't too happy either.  LOL

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RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/17/2008 11:34:48 PM   
MakeMeSmile4U


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Joined: 4/27/2008
From: South Florida
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I went into a bagel place to pick up some bagels and cream cheese for myself and my coworkers.  I ordered a dozen bagels and a large cream cheese.  The clerk handed me a small (4 oz) container.  As I handed it back to him I said "No...I want the 8 inches...I mean ounces"   He broke into a BIG grin and said "Ooooh...I know what you're thinking about".

I have never blushed so hard in my life.  I managed to mumble something about having to leave right now, and left the store.

And no, I never went back to that place again!

_____________________________

"And of course you can't become if you only say what you would have done, so I missed a million miles of fun"~Len

"Do all those things that you do to me, ya know what I mean boy... Do all those things that you do to me, yeah.." ~The Cult

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)
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RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/17/2008 11:36:50 PM   
YourhandMyAss


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From: Sacramento
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 Ome day after school I was in the dollar store and I bent down to check out something in a bin below another ben stood up and BAM cracked my head really hard on the mettle shelving above me, then later that night, I stepped on the edge of my moms stupidly long curtain across the hallway, and brought the rod crashing down onto my head. And that little fucker hurt awfully bad for such a little rod.


next week at school the hatch of Daddy's car hit me on the head, right smack on top, and I am ok yes, but it was shocking.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MarksFantasyGirl

I have one of my FAVORITE songs as my ringtone on my cell.  Well, I was on it one day talking to someone, and my song started playing on the radio.  I told the peron I was talking to to hold on for a minute, and started to look for my phone.  The only reason that I realized what happened, was because the radio played more than my phone does when it rings.... Yeah... I'm a goober!

Not too long ago, I was putting dishes and things away, and I had my laptop sitting on the counter.  Well, I didn't have it straight on there because I was listeing to music, and I had it pointed at me.  I went to lean down to put something away under it, and BAM!  Corner of the laptop ringht into my forehead!  Maybe like an hour or so later, I went to pick something up off of the floor, and BAM! My whole head into the table.  For some reason, I thought of Holly... Sorry girl.  But I did! lmao

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RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/17/2008 11:40:03 PM   
MakeMeSmile4U


Posts: 710
Joined: 4/27/2008
From: South Florida
Status: offline
This isn't my story, but it's too good to not share it!

A friend was in the early stages of her relationship with her master.  During one particular play session he told her he wanted to use a blindfold.  She looked at him wide-eyed and asked (in all seriousness) "Really?  You're THAT good that you can do this blindfolded???"

_____________________________

"And of course you can't become if you only say what you would have done, so I missed a million miles of fun"~Len

"Do all those things that you do to me, ya know what I mean boy... Do all those things that you do to me, yeah.." ~The Cult

(in reply to MakeMeSmile4U)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/17/2008 11:44:13 PM   
sarahanna


Posts: 14
Status: offline
I was helping a high school with their Cabaret show, and had lost my voice and was having a coughing fit backstage while telling a bunch of high school boys what they needed to do to get the stage ready for the night. One of the boys asks me really nicely if he can get me some water and I politely say no, I just need something hard to suck on....then proceed to bright red, as I correct myself and say I just need a cough drop. To this day the young man will occasionally ask me if I need a cough drop.


quote:

ORIGINAL: MakeMeSmile4U

I went into a bagel place to pick up some bagels and cream cheese for myself and my coworkers.  I ordered a dozen bagels and a large cream cheese.  The clerk handed me a small (4 oz) container.  As I handed it back to him I said "No...I want the 8 inches...I mean ounces"   He broke into a BIG grin and said "Ooooh...I know what you're thinking about".

I have never blushed so hard in my life.  I managed to mumble something about having to leave right now, and left the store.

And no, I never went back to that place again!

(in reply to MakeMeSmile4U)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/18/2008 12:17:21 AM   
ThatDaveGuy69


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Joined: 6/22/2007
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YourHandMyAss:
"And that little fucker hurt awfully bad for such a little rod. "

I'll bet you say that to all the boys! :D :D :D

~Dave



_____________________________

He said I'd blown a seal. I said fix the damn thing and leave my private life out of this!
What happens in the event horizon STAYS in the Event Horizon!
I have zero tolerance for Zero Tolerance

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Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/18/2008 8:59:58 AM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline
Laughing in real life :)
quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDaveGuy69

YourHandMyAss:
"And that little fucker hurt awfully bad for such a little rod. "

I'll bet you say that to all the boys! :D :D :D

~Dave



(in reply to ThatDaveGuy69)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/18/2008 9:23:12 AM   
persephonee


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Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MakeMeSmile4U

This isn't my story, but it's too good to not share it!

A friend was in the early stages of her relationship with her master.  During one particular play session he told her he wanted to use a blindfold.  She looked at him wide-eyed and asked (in all seriousness) "Really?  You're THAT good that you can do this blindfolded???"


Wait, wait...i have one of these...
i was cleaning up with the closing crew after a nite at our local dungeon...and i was sweeping the floor of the kitchen with everyone else running about collecting garbage and doing the dungeons dishes etc...and i swept up against a blue plastic dog dish...looked up happily and squealed...."Oh!...i didnt know the Space had a puppy!!!!"

Everyone stopped cleaning to stare at me for about 2 full minutes before i realized what i had just said....
One of the finer perse-brain moments in time....the looks were priceless.

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to MakeMeSmile4U)
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RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/18/2008 9:26:37 AM   
MarksFantasyGirl


Posts: 3660
Joined: 10/13/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

I wanted to wake Daddy up since I was impatient about him waking up and I was stroking his face and meowing at him, and he muttered stupid cat and went back to sleep.



When I was with the ex, He didn't have cable or anything in his room, and I didn't do anything outside his room (I HATED that house!).  Well, one day I was awake extremely early (the unborn one didn't let me sleep long enough!) and I was really bored.  So since he wouldn't get up when I tried to wake him to keep my company, and I took some of my soggy cheerios and placed them strategically on his face.  I knew that he could sleep through anything, so I wanted to see how many I could put on there before he woke..... 14!  Then the first one started to dry up, and it was making him itchy.  So he started rubbing his face.  I didn't want them to go in his eyes, so I very sweetly yelled at him to stop rubbing!  I pulled all the cerial off of him.  He was PISSED!  He yelled at me for a good ten minutes. I just laughed at him because he had spots of milk all over his face.  He didn't talk to me the rest of the day! hahaha!

_____________________________

--Fannie
AKA Savage's Fantasy
AKA Girl Dave
AKA Resident Flirt
AKA Sexy Hawt Woman

~*~Happily and proudly collared by my best friend~*~

Quitcher bitchen, and get out of the kitchen! ~Harry {3rdRock}

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/19/2008 1:20:09 AM   
stella41b


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Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline
This thread brings back memories of when I was first living in Poland and some of the bloopers I came out with there.. I decided to learn the language not long after deciding to live there, but this led to some goofy situations.

Like the time when I went to buy half a dozen frankfurters. I went to a local butchers shop and waited in the queue, having practised the phrase I needed and leaving the phrase book at home. My turn came and the women behind the counter asked me what I wanted, and in loud, clear Polish I told her that I wanted half a dozen frankfurters. She asked me to give a weight, which is the precise moment when I realised I hadn't learned Polish numbers that good, and hadn't learned words for weights and measurements at all. So I guessed. The woman took the entire tray of frankfurters from the shop window and weighed them, and put them into a plastic carrier bag. She then looked for and found another string of frankfurters that were hanging behind the counter, weighed them, and stuffed them into another plastic carrier bag. Then she disappeared into the back of the shop.

She returned carrying a large plastic container of... frankfurters, and from this container she started piling frankfurters onto the weighing scales and putting them into plastic carrier bags and she did this once,.. twice,.. three times.. and continued. I didn't know the words for 'stop', 'this isn't what I want', so I just stood there having a sinking feeling. After she had filled six carrier bags she stopped. I had bought about 20kg (44lbs) of frankfurters which took all the money I had with me, about $20. I was sharing a flat at the time, I crammed the fridge with as many frankfurters as I could. I decided to give all the people living in the block frankfurters, I would throw frankfurters towards any dog or cat I came across, and I tried to give away frankfurters to people passing in the street.

Have you ever tried to give people passing in the street free frankfurters?

Polish has a lot of words which sound the same but which have completely different meanings. I caused a stunned silence at a large family dinner when I pointed to the couple sitting next to my hostess and asked her if they were her aunt and uncle. However 'ciocia' (pronounced chocher) means aunt, but 'ciota' (pronounced chotter) is a very vulgar term meaning 'faggot' and so I was really asking 'Is this your uncle and faggot?'

Polish also has two genders - masculine and feminine. I remember moving to a small town to work and the difficulty I had in buying a monthly bus ticket for the town. I had mixed up the genders of the same word. Miesięcznik (pronounced myesyenchick) is masculine and means monthly, or colloqually a monthly bus ticket. However the feminine form 'miesiączka' (pronounced myesyawnch-ka) also means monthly, but relates specifically to menstruation or the period. I had gone round to every kiosk and shop in town over two weeks asking both men and women 'Are you menstruating?' I wouldn't have been none the wiser hadn't the women in the shop where I tried twice got offended and chased me out of her shop with a broom. This earned me the nickname of 'Tampax' from the guys drinking beer outside the shops on the estate and took me some time to live down.


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RE: Silly Lifestyle Stories - 12/19/2008 1:44:44 AM   
KMsAngel


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*snortgiggle*

oh stella, you REALLY need to write a book!

"how to live as a native when you don't speak the language: frankfurters forever"

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20 fluffy points!

flightless cherub


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