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Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 7:08:22 PM   
footslaveinct


Posts: 23
Joined: 6/6/2007
Status: offline 		I have had this experience many times and don't quite understand. I will reach out to someone and we engage in several e-mails getting to know one another, lots of questions and answers and then get to the point where we talk about meeting and then the domme comes out with the fact that her cost is x for sessions. Now I have absolutely nothing against pro-dommes, but I just wish people could be more upfront about the fact that are pros and seek sessions for pay. It's very disappointing when you feel like you have made a connection and then fidn out it's all about the money.
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RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 7:42:25 PM   
stef


Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline 		Tragic.

Ask up front if they are a pro.  This isn't rocket science.

~stef


_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to footslaveinct)
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RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 7:44:21 PM   
footslaveinct


Posts: 23
Joined: 6/6/2007
Status: offline 		Sometimes the simplest idea is the best, you are absolutely right!

(in reply to stef)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 8:09:08 PM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		stef is absolutely correct, but I have to wonder... 
 
What kind of "connection" are you making with someone who turns out to be a pro?  I mean, someone who's in it for the cash is not going to spend time emailing and talking on the phone about things that have nothing to do with specific fetishes and play time.  Are you talking with them about the things that really make a "connection" on any level beyond play? 
 
What are your criteria for a connection?

_____________________________

Tress


"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


(in reply to footslaveinct)
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RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 8:15:58 PM   
chiaThePet


Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline 		http://www.collarchat.com/m_2386199/tm.htm 

Next on Soapra, BBW And The Letters They Eat.

chia* (the pet)

_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

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RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 9:21:39 PM   
footslaveinct


Posts: 23
Joined: 6/6/2007
Status: offline 		Most times in e-mails and conversations we speak often on many things outside of the bdsm world. Is the pro thinking that if they lead somebody on that way the sub is more likely to pay for a session. I mean if I wanted to meet a pro there are many sites to find a pro-domme. 

(in reply to yourMissTress)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 9:27:33 PM   
footslaveinct


Posts: 23
Joined: 6/6/2007
Status: offline 		I'm glad you find people's struggles to find someone so amusing

(in reply to chiaThePet)
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RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 9:30:56 PM   
FullfigRIMAAM1


Posts: 1160
Joined: 11/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet
http://www.collarchat.com/m_2386199/tm.htm 

Next on Soapra, BBW And The Letters They Eat.

chia* (the pet)
We do not eat letters! We eat smartass submissives. *Oh wait, they might like that* Let me think about this a little more. M

_____________________________

The place to improve the world is first in one's own heart and head and hands.-Robert M. Persig

Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence Erich Fromm

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RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 9:40:03 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		Ok, if you go into the conversation with a 18-25 y/o with an amazing photo (maybe just one?) who seems sooo interested in fulfilling your every foot related fantasy...

She might be a pro dude.

*Edit* WAIT! I found the problem.

" I can be generous and know that your time is valuable." from your profile. Might want to ah... rephrase that or something. It looks like (to me, ok) that you used to be willing to pay for it, until you found out that no one would do it for twenty bucks and oral 'service'. Also, might want to mention something other than your foot/shoe thing that you've got going on. 

< Message edited by Lynnxz -- 1/11/2009 9:43:54 PM >

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RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 10:00:51 PM   
Coupleofwhats


Posts: 280
Joined: 6/4/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

Ok, if you go into the conversation with a 18-25 y/o with an amazing photo (maybe just one?) who seems sooo interested in fulfilling your every foot related fantasy...

She might be a pro dude.

*Edit* WAIT! I found the problem.

" I can be generous and know that your time is valuable." from your profile. Might want to ah... rephrase that or something. It looks like (to me, ok) that you used to be willing to pay for it, until you found out that no one would do it for twenty bucks and oral 'service'. Also, might want to mention something other than your foot/shoe thing that you've got going on.


Agreed. Talk of "generosity" is a euphemism for money in internet land.

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RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 10:03:08 PM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline 		I refer you to the second sentence in your profile text:
"I can be generous and know that your time is valuable."

I'm not a pro-Domme but if I were, I imagine that sentence, and the prominent placement of it, would make me see dollar signs.

Even from my perspective as a (non-pro) Domme, the wording of that sentence does make it seem as though you may be either hoping to attract, or at the very least are not averse to, some Pro-Domme action.

Mystery solved... Did I earn some Scooby Snacks?

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(in reply to footslaveinct)
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RE: Pro-dommes - 1/11/2009 11:12:46 PM   
chiaThePet


Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: footslaveinct

I'm glad you find people's struggles to find someone so amusing


Then we're both smiling.

God I love this place.

Look for the silver lining.

Not the worn out thread.

chia* (the pet)

_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

(in reply to footslaveinct)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Pro-dommes - 1/12/2009 12:47:56 AM   
Celene


Posts: 158
Joined: 12/28/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

quote:

ORIGINAL: footslaveinct

I'm glad you find people's struggles to find someone so amusing


Then we're both smiling.

God I love this place.

Look for the silver lining.

Not the worn out thread.

chia* (the pet)


I'm stealing this for my sig.

_____________________________

That was then, this is now.

(in reply to chiaThePet)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Pro-dommes - 1/12/2009 2:32:28 AM   
footslaveinct


Posts: 23
Joined: 6/6/2007
Status: offline 		I must edit my profile, I never thought about what I might be referring to. Thank you to all who pointed that out. Scooby snacks all around!

(in reply to Celene)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Pro-dommes - 1/12/2009 3:09:53 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		Why the hell would a pro Mistress tout for business on a site like this? Its going to take a whole lot of time with a very low return.
I know that there are pro's on here that are on the look out for customers and I only have one thing to say to them. 'Your going to probably get less than a 1% return if that as well as a whole lot of flack, so why the hell don't you go and build yourself a decent web site, advertise locally and get yourself onto the pro Mistress sites or is that too difficult?

(in reply to footslaveinct)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Pro-dommes - 1/12/2009 4:32:10 AM   
CatdeMedici


Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
Status: offline 		In all fairness Tress, in some aspects you are right, a REAL Pro won't-they have a business to run-however, we have seen a nasty increase in what I call the "hit and runs"--those that are not pros but have become pros in seeking or gaining tribute or worse just flat trying to con--those aren't what we would define as Pros--but they are pros in fleecing  the unsuspecting sub giving Pros a bad name-- and they aren't all from Ghana.

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I am the Cat, holder of the whip and chair.

"Let's see-whips, dips, chains, chips, yep sounds like a party to Me!"

(in reply to yourMissTress)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Pro-dommes - 1/12/2009 5:18:18 AM   
ALAstella


Posts: 253
Joined: 12/3/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: footslaveinct

I'm glad you find people's struggles to find someone so amusing


OMG, are you being serious here? A 'struggle'? Pull the other one, it's got bells on it.

Just for a bit of perspective, the situation you describe in your OP is certainly no worse than that of many women on this site who also build up hopes after e-mails, IM chats and phone calls only to find all that the guy wants is a quick shag and that she means nothing more to him than sex.

But it's not just the time and effort spent in the e-mails, the IM chats and the phone calls, there's also the additional expense of stuff such as stockings, clothing, cosmetics, because a lot of guys expect a domme to look the part too.

Many expect to have the scene at her place, so she's got to have the equipment, and that too is an expense, not to mention the cleaning up afterwards.. and for what? To most guys the end of the scene comes when they've shot their wad and like it or not there's an awful lot of women out there who after the scene is over and all the stuff is cleaned up, the make up comes off together with the clothing go to sleep in a cold, empty bed.

Let us not forget that one of the most crucial elements of WIITWD and BDSM is consideration for the other person, and this is essential no matter who you are and what role you assume in WIITWD. Without it you get nowhere.

However it appears that there's a lot of people out there who are simply not prepared to show any consideration for others, and I'm sorry, but I for one am not prepared to condemn these women for trying to get a little financial compensation for their time and effort spent with self-centred male submissives who can only think of their dick and what they are into.

This is not to say that I agree with the underhand way of trying to exploit a genuine male submissive (which I am assuming the OP is) but I can clearly see both sides here and I can understand quite clearly why some women do seek 'tributes'.


(in reply to footslaveinct)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Pro-dommes - 1/12/2009 5:59:16 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

Why the hell would a pro Mistress tout for business on a site like this?
It's free and it's full of people in the lifestlye, some on whom might be interested in a Pro and because they can.

Its going to take a whole lot of time with a very low return.
If the only thing they are after are clients then this might be true. If they come for the forums and to interact with others, then the return is up to them.

I know that there are pro's on here that are on the look out for customers and I only have one thing to say to them. 'Your going to probably get less than a 1% return if that as well as a whole lot of flack, so why the hell don't you go and build yourself a decent web site, advertise locally and get yourself onto the pro Mistress sites or is that too difficult?
How do you know they are not also advertising elsewhere? And who are you to tell someone they don't belong here. Every Pro Domme I know is also in the lifestyle the same as I am. They have just as much right to be on this site as you and me.



_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert


This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Pro-dommes - 1/12/2009 6:42:02 AM   
chiaThePet


Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Celene

quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

Look for the silver lining.

Not the worn out thread.

chia* (the pet)


I'm stealing this for my sig.


And she was wearing a bonnet officer, and driving one of them classy carriages.

I never saw it coming officer, she was smooth as silk I tell ya, smooth as silk.

chia* (the pet) 

_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

(in reply to Celene)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Pro-dommes - 1/12/2009 8:25:53 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

Why the hell would a pro Mistress tout for business on a site like this?
It's free and it's full of people in the lifestlye, some on whom might be interested in a Pro and because they can.

Its going to take a whole lot of time with a very low return.
If the only thing they are after are clients then this might be true. If they come for the forums and to interact with others, then the return is up to them.

I know that there are pro's on here that are on the look out for customers and I only have one thing to say to them. 'Your going to probably get less than a 1% return if that as well as a whole lot of flack, so why the hell don't you go and build yourself a decent web site, advertise locally and get yourself onto the pro Mistress sites or is that too difficult?
How do you know they are not also advertising elsewhere? And who are you to tell someone they don't belong here. Every Pro Domme I know is also in the lifestyle the same as I am. They have just as much right to be on this site as you and me.




When I worked as a pro Mistress I had a website and I would advertise locally as well as on Mistress sites. I employed a secretary because of the huge volume of calls that came through from that sort of marketing and I didn't want to miss those calls when I had a client. I could of come on sites like this and spent hours trying to groom someone before telling them that 'actually its your money I want' but I didn't because a. It would of been a huge amount of valuable time with probably little to no return and b. I was always clear and upfront about what I was offering and for how much.

I am not telling people they don't belong here. Please point out where I said that? but am asking why they would want to waste, time and effort on badly chosen marketing. If they come here for other reasons then thats cool.





(in reply to thishereboi)
Profile   Post #: 20
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