beargonewild
Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant
I disagree. This is not jumping on you in particular, slavegirl but against those who think the past is just that...the past. That's a wonderful way to think and if you can do so, more power to you. However, there are those on here whose professions could be damaged if a partner's past behavior were known. And oddly enough, the fact that a person had done a porno film or posed for porno/kinky photos could be more of a problem than the fact that the person had been a criminal of some sort (depending on the crime, of course). That happens because many tend to look at past criminal behavior as an indicator and study the person closely now to see if they really are remorseful for their crimes. They tend to do the same thing with someone who has a known sexual past when that sexual past has a lurid nature to it BUT along with that scrutiny comes the hope/anticipation(?) that they will fall back to their "sexually deviant, wicked ways".
There's things I've done...and have owned up to...that were a detour from the route of my life; a route I'd followed up to the detour and since the detour. Those things have cost me, though they are well in the past and when looked at in terms of time, took up only 1/26th of my life. Doesn't matter to some...I am just as bad now---in their eyes---as I was when those things occurred. And that is their right to feel that way, rightly or wrongly. I've said it before...we all judge. We do so the minute we express an opinion on any subject. You might think that I would not judge others, based on my own experience. You'd be wrong. There's a thread about belief systems and the fact that, no matter how flexible you are, if you don't have some core beliefs---you are nothing but a chameleon. And those beliefs are...in and of themselves...judgments.
In relation to the OP's question, No I will not judge nor will I condemn a partner who posed for nude photos or made a porn movie. I have to say No I would not end a relationship because my partner wanted to try their hand at porn. In my eyes, I have no right to condemn a dream or wish that my partner has, to do so would be demeaning their desires and conssequently demeaning my partner as a person.
CD: Yet a person also has to understand that what I have done in the past is strictly in the past. I does not accurately reflect who I am now. Granted the experiences of my past helped create who I am now as a person though it is just one of hundreds of experiences I lived up to this point in my life. Yes there are several things in my past I am not proud of yet without me doing what I doine, I would not be the person I am today. In the context of the OP's query, it is far to easy to condemn and make a negative judgement on another because of their past history. If that would be the case then I should be dammed as my own past includes: excessive drinking and drugging, whoring myself out for recreational drugs, being a willing participant on numerous affairs with married men, among various other things.
All those activities I engaged in happened in my past and that is where they remain. This I can guarantee as the circumstances which were in place at that time is impossible to reoccur in the present or the future. The main thing is to understand that people can change and they do change.
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RE: Your partner posing nude or for porn, hard limit? - 
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