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RE: Too much info - 2/1/2009 10:40:18 AM

domiguy

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At least it appears you have resolved the issues of your rape.

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RE: Too much info - 2/1/2009 11:28:37 AM

agirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: torturedmuse

quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

There's a lot of stuff your chap may have in mind...especially if you've been together a while and care about each other.

If you've been raped etc, he has to deal with the negative aspetcs of it for you, as someone he cares about. It's a lot easier being on the receiving end than having the responsibility of the possible fallout.

Perhaps it's not about YOU being *ok* about it ........It's about HIM being SURE in his own mind that you're *ok* about it.

There are FAR less important things in my life that M considers and cares about.

I don't want to direct situations (ok, that's a lie , I do) but the fact is, it's up to M whether he will *do* something that I indicate I'd like.

I'd be apprehensive about treading in areas that have caused ANYONE grief, let alone people I had control, care and authority over. It's something considerate people do.

agirl

That could be part of it. Perhaps he wants the reassurance that I am ok with being raped, or having done to me what he is about to do. It's great he cares like that don't get me wrong, but sometimes he just needs to take it anyway..lol

Mhhmm, it's not JUST on YOUR shoulders if he *rapes* you and gets it wrong. Perhaps if he was like it about everything, it'd be slightly different.

Of course , it wouldn't be *rape* in any case. But it's just a *perhaps* that he might consider, before getting your *kink* on.

agirl

< Message edited by agirl -- 2/1/2009 11:33:26 AM >

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RE: Too much info - 2/1/2009 12:13:25 PM

Cookiedom

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Viking777

As a Master , why the question at all your master has missed the point of being a Master. The Master just does never asks it betrays the role of Master, I would lose control of my trained slave if I even began to think that the slave had a right to any tought, desire or wish. Every action pleasurable or painful "I The Master" decide. All she can do is submit.
If you have to tell him that its ok. who is the Slave??????

I know that I am new to the forums and still learning about M/s, as we all are, because you never stop learning, but is this post for real ? Or do I just not get the humour ?

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RE: Too much info - 2/1/2009 12:24:44 PM

DesFIP

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He may get off on saying it.

Beyond that, he's probably afraid of causing a flashback if he doesn't warn you. This shows him to be a great guy who is careful of taking good care of you. Thank him for that, and if you don't now use safewords ask for one. Then if you assure him that if something goes wrong you will yell red or artichoke or safeword, he won't be so worried about causing you damage.

Tell him you would love for him to just push you down and take you, with no warning, and not much talking. Maybe just one word commands. And that if necessary you will use the safeword so he doesn't have to worry.

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RE: Too much info - 2/1/2009 2:01:11 PM

agirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cookiedom

quote:

ORIGINAL: Viking777

As a Master , why the question at all your master has missed the point of being a Master. The Master just does never asks it betrays the role of Master, I would lose control of my trained slave if I even began to think that the slave had a right to any tought, desire or wish. Every action pleasurable or painful "I The Master" decide. All she can do is submit.
If you have to tell him that its ok. who is the Slave??????

I know that I am new to the forums and still learning about M/s, as we all are, because you never stop learning, but is this post for real ? Or do I just not get the humour ?

Not sure...lol.

When I read this type of post I just walk on by. It's not usually worth touching as it's too far removed from my understanding and the type of relationship I'd be in.

I prefer the fact that M can cope with me DESPITE me having thoughts, desires and wishes.

It was a badly written post anyhow......which made it funny.

agirl

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RE: Too much info - 2/1/2009 3:09:54 PM

sparkyRBF

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oh hey! i just had an idea! Maybe ask him if you can write fantasy stories for him. Master sometimes likes to reads my stories and it sure helps with a nice toss on the bed and a spankin if not more.

But write him out a rape fantasy you have.. ask him if he has a fantasy he'd like to write out, exchange the fantasies, you act out his, and maybe he will act out yours.

and btw, love the nick "CookieDom" I believe that post was not meant to be humorous but some Doms think that whenever a submissive would like to be fulfilled she is topping from the bottom and that is the point i believe he was trying to make.

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Post #: 46

RE: Too much info - 2/1/2009 3:18:07 PM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: torturedmuse

I want to be surprised, blindfolded, perhaps tied up, used, abused..etc. by him during this scene. I want to kick, push him away, and have him take over everything and put me in my place.

Having been there, done that... I gotta say that, until you get more experience doing it, I really would advise there being some sort signal so that you know it's him. It's... safer for everyone involved.

*whistles innocently*

Other than that, just talk to him. It can be hard for people to flip the switch and rape someone they love. So, be patient with him. He may not be able to go from zero to eighty the first time.

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RE: Too much info - 2/1/2009 3:32:09 PM

whiteslavebitch

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Viking777

As a Master , why the question at all your master has missed the point of being a Master. The Master just does never asks it betrays the role of Master, I would lose control of my trained slave if I even began to think that the slave had a right to any tought, desire or wish. Every action pleasurable or painful "I The Master" decide. All she can do is submit.
If you have to tell him that its ok. who is the Slave??????

So us slaves are not allowed to think for ourselves, desire anything, or wish for anything. That's good to know, I guess I've been doing it all wrong. Please send me the updated Slave Manual so I can be aware of all the rules. Oh, and I will be sure to pass this info to MasterK, so he knows also that he has not been doing things right.

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RE: Too much info - 2/2/2009 12:46:31 PM

DesFIP

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quote:

ORIGINAL: whiteslavebitch

quote:

ORIGINAL: Viking777

As a Master , why the question at all your master has missed the point of being a Master. The Master just does never asks it betrays the role of Master, I would lose control of my trained slave if I even began to think that the slave had a right to any tought, desire or wish. Every action pleasurable or painful "I The Master" decide. All she can do is submit.
If you have to tell him that its ok. who is the Slave??????

So us slaves are not allowed to think for ourselves, desire anything, or wish for anything. That's good to know, I guess I've been doing it all wrong. Please send me the updated Slave Manual so I can be aware of all the rules. Oh, and I will be sure to pass this info to MasterK, so he knows also that he has not been doing things right.

My best guess is that this dude is the alter ego of the one who claimed that twue slaves don't choose who to be slaves to.

And god forbid a d type want someone compatible, who enjoys what he does instead of just taking it sullenly. I mean, why would anybody want someone who loved what he did to her and made it clear that she thinks he's the hottest thing since sliced bread?

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RE: Too much info - 2/2/2009 3:42:54 PM

LarabysLair

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quote:

ORIGINAL: YoursMistress

Is it just me or have decades of "No means no" placed a conscious or at least subconscious fear of shame, reprisal or charges against your wish to be taken without being asked. I think it would be virtually impossible for me to do this without "checking in" somehow before things had gone too far.

Let us remember that in the eyes of the law, in point of fact "no means absolutely no!" and there have been instances where men, doms, tops, masters, husbands have been charged and jailed for that very gotcha of the law. In fact, on another board, one of the subbies had her dom charged with rape and he was jailed for this very thing. There was quite a thread going about it for a time and most of the community sided with her that even slave-rape is still rape.

Nonconsensual rape is really hot and can trigger a lot of emotional buttons and such. But, let's not forget that the OP may not be in the mood to be raped or in the proper headspace or may be feeling very unsexy at some inopportune point in time. If the Dom wishes to rape her then is the Dominant supposed to just read her mind and forget that she didn't wish to be consulted on her rape? Or is he to proceed to rape her and let the ships fall where they may? I have seen the latter result in serious problems for both. But it has also had in other situations worked out well?

I'd suggest the OP work out a non-verbal out of scene signal system to let the Dom know about her willingness to be raped. Maybe a red scarf hanging on a specific hook. Thare are various less verbal ways to express temporal consent.

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