RE: Questions for male submissive's

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Scotty306134 -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/13/2009 9:29:51 PM)
I like to check out their profile when I read an interesting post or response. Several times I've looked at profiles to see where the person is located. If they happen to be close by there could be the possibility of meeting sometime and making new friends. I know I've viewed Lockit's profile several times.... my short term memory's going down the tubes and I keep forgeting where She's located! Lockit I love Your posts and Your stories, Scotty

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/13/2009 9:39:59 PM)
Thank you Scotty. I took the stories off, but once in a while put one in for a day or so. I've moved around a bit, so that may add to the confusion! But I'm not moving anymore. If you want to read some of the stories.. just let me know and I can tell you where they can be found. Not a pay site either! lol

littlesarbonn -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/13/2009 9:40:20 PM)
It may have nothing to do with anything in the profile sending up a red flag or even shyness on the sub's part. I look at a lot of profiles because I'm often very interested in knowing more about a person who I see posting on the boards. I've probably looked at your profile a few times myself over the years. But then I don't really contact people outright because I figure if someone's interested in me, she'll contact me; I'd rather not add to the amount of mail that they're already getting. Yeah, it's a losing position for me in the long run, but I feel that I'd rather not burden someone than add to the noise they're already having to wade through. There are very few I have actually contacted, but that's usually because I actually feel there might be a connection, we're close enough that such a connection might flourish, and they seem to be interested in looking for someone like me. But I'll be honest; I've not been that successful because my perception doesn't always meet with results. So, I tend to avoid contacting people even more.

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/13/2009 9:43:59 PM)
Well Fabio... there have been times when I thought you were overwhelmed with women rushing you! It is so hard to know what is what sometimes. But you know Fabio... you write a nice email... well anything actually. I would think that any dominant would welcome you!

littlesarbonn -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/13/2009 9:49:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit Well Fabio... there have been times when I thought you were overwhelmed with women rushing you! It is so hard to know what is what sometimes. But you know Fabio... you write a nice email... well anything actually. I would think that any dominant would welcome you! The only time the women rush me is when I'm playing football against the women's football team, and they all rush me, tackling me because I have the ball, and then they're all on top of me squirming, trying to get at the ball and....I'm sorry, what was I talking about?

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/13/2009 9:54:55 PM)
LOL... I would like to hear the rest of that lil story!

Pinkpottiepants -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 2:09:52 AM)
I have no doubt that what you placed in your profile is honest and from the heart and hiding things is no way to start a relationship of any kind, however I was always told to put my best foot forward when moving ahead. Everything else comes along very shortly after that, but my best foot is what is seen first. When I came upon this string, I looked at your profile with an opened mind so that I might be able to answer the question you asked and my response was how I felt when reading it. Perhaps I'm alone on that.

Andalusite -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 8:29:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: igor2003 If a woman says she is dominant or a Mistress, but won't (or don't) list any of her BDSM interests makes me wonder just how dominant she really is. This is, after all, a BDSM site, and looking at BDSM compatability is every bit as important as compatability in any of the other areas of a relationship. I agree that compatibility is important, but for me, that depends more on our playstyles, headspace, and things like that. I dislike reducing that aspect to a few lines on the screen, and feel it is much hotter and more fun to discuss it in person. Also, I feel that I get fewer fakes and cyber-fantasists that way, so it is part of my screening process. Also, I tend in general to be more focused on how he reacts to what I do than to the specific tool. I don't have a fetish for paddles, tawses, canes, etc., I want him to writhe, and shiver, and yelp, moan and whimper in a way that I think is hot, while I'm hitting him. D/s service is important to me, but the mindset of why he does it is important, not just that he complete the task, if I am going to be his Domme.

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 11:35:33 AM)
Pinkpottiepants, don't you see that one of my finest quailities is my forthright way? You don't get me and many don't. But I am as upfront as it comes and if that turns people off... that wouldn't be my problem. I am not looking for just anyone! I am looking for the exceptional... maybe not anyone's idea of what exceptional is or means... exceptional means to me... that person gets me, likes me as I am and can see clearly who and what I am. So no.. I won't be hiding under the guise of slowly working into those dark areas of my life and self and slowly enticing someone until they are under some sweet and soft impression so that I can stick the truth to them when I have them all ready for it. Even if I were to do that... that means an investment from two people getting to know someone. Do you think if I slowly told them and then when they knew, they wouldn't walk away and this time with a really foul taste in their mouth? Believe me, I would rather seem overwhelming than to be thought of as in any way dishonorable in buttering them up so that I could prolong things. And by that time by investing myself as well... don't you think it would hurt me more when they walked away. I tend to like things short and sweet and if someone is going to run because I am ill and I care for my adult son and life is what it is... then it really doesn't matter when they know that... they are going to run. If someone has a problem because I tell people what I want and expect and I have rules... then again... they wouldn't like me much in person either. You can't teach me something I have lived here. My post on this was not about why people repeatedly look and don't contact as a complaint. I just wondered why it happend because I had talked to others that it was happening with too and they are not sick and in a similar situation as I am. I wanted to understand what a submissive might be feeling so that I could understand them more. I now understand that some like yourself might feel as you do. But darlin... like I said... if they were that overwhelmed... they might be afriad to even look at my pictures. That overwhelmed and I have no problem with them not contacting me (if I had one to start with) and even checking out my pictures once in a while. They simply wouldn't have what it takes to be in my life. I wish them well... but they are not for me.

rob425 -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 1:08:37 PM)
Well here is my thinking. If I read the profile and journals and still want to know more I view the full profile so I can read the activities list to see if there is a commonality and then I progress from there. Its a good way to guess if their will be a fit

beargonewild -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 2:30:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit I've been at CM for almost two years and have a number of submissive men who consistantly look at my profile, but have never made contact. I have wondered from time to time, what they were there for and what might be going on. This isn't a complaint because I am not getting enough email! lol I just wondered if there are reasons that a submissive male might be afriad or too shy to make contact with a dominant and sometimes if they are continuing to visit a profile in hopes that the dominant will contact them. What are red flags to you besides the financial demands you might find on a profile? What do you like to see in a profile? What do you look for and what attract's you? What makes you decide to contact a dominant? What are you looking for in life and with a dominant? Are you just viewing profiles just to look at pictures or for other reasons? Please speak your mind and give a view into the way you see things. I am not looking for evaluation on my profile or for anything other than to understand what some of you might be thinking and feeling. Only view the profiles without making contact because I'm shy.

Dastan -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 2:53:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit Dastan, you have mail. ...I am sorry, at this moment I am not able to reply because I am having an egourysm and I am in Heaven, please leave me a note and I'll respond when Ire-enter Earth's Atmosphere, leave your message after the beep.... ....beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepp...

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 2:57:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: iwearpanties as for my self i look for Misstress / Dominant that i may have simular likes or dislikes now that said im sure it dosen't mean She will gladly excpet my messages or email i fully understand that . What dose make me want too send them a note / email is i may have read there profle and it just got me realy wanting too meet or chatt more with them . Thank you iwearpanties... I didn't mean to ignore your post! I keep thinking I can get back to someone and then something else distracts me. I know it must be hard when you email someone and are sincere and you don't get an email back. But that is just the way it is and we can't take it personally... still it sucks!

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 3:00:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven I browse photos. If I find a pic I like, I look at the profile. There's a lot of info that the profile contains that the photo doesn't: Relocatability Likes/dislikes Paragraphs (sometimes a woman makes a 400 line personal statement which is much easier to read with carriage returns). I do write in paragraphs... but too many from what I am hearing! Dear Funny One... I would like to look at some pictures of you! lol

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 3:03:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Eamane For me (of course I'm a female sub but I think the reasoning may be cross gendered) I view and then don't message because I don't want to appear to forward and unsubbly-silly, I know. I view the full profile and leave the contacting up to the Dom in question if he (in my case) is interested in my profile. As for repeated views...maybe you're just pretty ^-^ Hello Eamane, it's nice to meet you! Welcome to the boards! Some dominants like being contacted and some think it is foward... you just never know and I am sure that doesn't help with the concern about contacting them. Maybe you can watch the boards and kind of get a feel for how some of the dominant's act and what they are like and then try contacting them. Who knows.. a month down the road you could be very comfortable with the whole idea! Have fun!

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 3:07:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: xenboi Not sure i can compare it to people watching but when i come across Someone on the forum that has written something that interests me i often have a look at their profile. Mainly to see where they are from and what their interests are beyond what i have gleaned from the forum post. i'd be lying if i said it wasn't just brazen perving on occasion! i try to keep that to a minimum though! Hello xenboi, welcome to the boards! A brazin perving isn't so bad! Perv all you want... I don't know many who think badly on someone perving them.. as long as they keep the emails friendly and not all out wank! hehe Which I am sure you aren't quilty of becasue you temper your brazin perving! Thanks for reading profiles! lol

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 3:09:09 PM)
beargonewild... you are shy? Wow.. I didn't know that! lol Well.. I hope your shy self is doing well! It's good to see you!

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 3:10:43 PM)
LOL Dastan! Careful with the landing... I hear they can be difficult to manage and hard if not managed...

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 3:20:28 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Andalusite I agree that compatibility is important, but for me, that depends more on our playstyles, headspace, and things like that. I dislike reducing that aspect to a few lines on the screen, and feel it is much hotter and more fun to discuss it in person. Also, I feel that I get fewer fakes and cyber-fantasists that way, so it is part of my screening process. Also, I tend in general to be more focused on how he reacts to what I do than to the specific tool. I don't have a fetish for paddles, tawses, canes, etc., I want him to writhe, and shiver, and yelp, moan and whimper in a way that I think is hot, while I'm hitting him. D/s service is important to me, but the mindset of why he does it is important, not just that he complete the task, if I am going to be his Domme. Hello Andalusite, I agree, I would rather talk about it all too! Even when someone says they like something, there are different ways of liking it or doing it and it is just better to talk I think. Plus, just in the talking about it you can find some interesting kicks in it if you are really connecting! lol

Lockit -> RE: Questions for male submissive's (4/14/2009 3:26:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rob425 Well here is my thinking. If I read the profile and journals and still want to know more I view the full profile so I can read the activities list to see if there is a commonality and then I progress from there. Its a good way to guess if their will be a fit Thank you for your input Rob! It is always great when you hear someone reading emails! lol So rare around here! I know that I don't list a lot of likes, but do try to tell about who I am so that we can see if the personality or desired goals might be good. So maybe there are some who don't see the list and can't know and then don't email. I have considered that, but still found it better to not list it becasue of some of the emails I would get. I am tempted to put some up again, but get a bit scared of some of those emails! But I would rather talk about them once we get certain other things going.

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