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RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 6:42:20 AM

SailingBum

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Senor Imus,

That's a classic only cuz it's true. still laffing.

BadOne

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Post #: 21

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 6:42:29 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kitastrophe33

A great many comments are great, but I still do wish there was a more supportive, embracing attitude over all...Build each other up, rather than tear each other down with snide, condescending comments.

this is an ADULT sex site and there are going to be times when most replies around here will be brutally honest and blunt. if you cannot handle that, time find a lovey dovey site which better suits you.

Collarme (at certain times) is not known for its romper room or Barney and Friends where everyone sings "i love you" atmosphere.

< Message edited by sambamanslilgirl -- 4/28/2009 6:43:23 AM >

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Post #: 22

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 6:42:31 AM

subtlebutterfly

Posts: 2230
Joined: 6/15/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DomImus

quote:

ORIGINAL: kitastrophe33
I'm pretty sure no one sits down to post a question thinking "what is the dumbest question I can possibly ask?"

So is it just a bonus when they succeed?

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA oh my gawd..this is the oh wow..

you more than made my day THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love you already!

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Post #: 23

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 6:44:36 AM

FullfigRIMAAM1

Posts: 1160
Joined: 11/20/2008
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I too was hoping for a board where everyone hugged, were civil to one another, and never were unkind to each other...   That would have taught me nothing though.    I've learned so much about humans here, and have always been fascinated by different behaviors, and personalities.   My own experiences have given me a perspective, in that some of the crazyness here is actually soothing to the soul.

Some people live to be unnecessarily unkind/nasty, and those, I have no use for.
I do respect people who have a personality, and can express selves in different ways.   Sometimes, a slap in the butt is necessary, and other times, an understanding hug.
Certainly, it behooves you to stay away from people who get a negative reaction out of you, while you figure out, why it is they're always able to affect you that way.
Welcome, and good luck,   M

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Post #: 24

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 6:53:40 AM

breatheasone

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~~FR to OP~~

Yes i've seen it and know what you speak of... If i may make a suggestion... Try and pay attention to the people that are supportive, and up lifting. Perhaps email them on the collarme system. Gravitate toward those that are edifying and positive, it helps. There are defiantly people on these forums that understand one can be helpful and kind or at the very least polite. There are MANY great people here... MANY.

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(in reply to kitastrophe33)

Post #: 25

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 6:55:45 AM

TaoWoman

Posts: 140
Joined: 2/27/2009
From: Kpe'me', Togo
Status: offline

quote:

Kinksters eat their young.

quote:

ORIGINAL: kitastrophe33

Okay not always. And not all of them. I have to say, though, that as I've been browsing the message boards there are a lot of really snippy responses to questions...especially some of the newbie questions that are admittedly sort of naive, but also sort of common questions. I'm pretty sure no one sits down to post a question thinking "what is the dumbest question I can possibly ask?"

There are infinite ways to be kinky. What is obvious to one may completely baffle another. There are no stupid questions.

A great many comments are great, but I still do wish there was a more supportive, embracing attitude over all...Build each other up, rather than tear each other down with snide, condescending comments.

I dunno...definitely not wanting to offend, just an observation...

"Kinksters eat their young."

Some of us are vegetarians

Seriously though, there are some newbie posts and subsequent profiles that are sorely lacking in common sense. For instance, a thread asking for oral sex tips is many times better received no matter how often it is asked than a thread asking how long should one wait to meet another in a coffee shop or should one masturbate on cam to their master of one week who holds their slavery tight in his online virtual collar~

Threads lacking in life skills and common sense usually meet with snippy remarks.

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(in reply to kitastrophe33)

Post #: 26

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 7:29:32 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kitastrophe33
There are no stupid questions.

So, you don't think the woman looking for ways for a submissive to restrain themselves in a method that would be inescapable during unbearable pain (possibly by putting hot pepper juice in the rectum) via webcam wasn't a stupid question?

I disagree. I think there are stupid questions.

I rarely get snippy with people that are asking an honest question. I'm a blunt person. I say it like I see it. Without the benefit of seeing facial expression or hearing tone of voice, it's easy to assume things about the authors demeanor. Including whether someone is being snippy.

Now that said, I get snippy with people who don't use common sense and those who do things to their subs/slaves/bottoms/play partners without researching the possibility for harm. The other irritant is someone who gets good honest advice and they sneer at the answers that have been given. As others have said, some people need the smack upside the head.

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Post #: 27

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 7:38:59 AM

BoiJen

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There are stupid questions and stupid people. I'm just clarifying that as a fact.

boi
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the list!....

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Post #: 28

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 7:42:30 AM

masterlink65

Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline

you noticed that happens huh?

do you really think it will stop?

its been going on since before i was into this, and it is in all walks of life.

best to ignore it and let the person show off their arrogance.

(in reply to kitastrophe33)

Post #: 29

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 8:17:36 AM

Andalusite

Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VioletGray
I think their condescending attitude makes them feel higher up in the kink pecking order. They just LOVE to know things that newbies don't.

I'm not usually condescending, snippy, or rude, but it is really annoying when someone who hasn't actually *done* BDSM in person tells me that they "Don't believe in switches" or that they know more than I do about what is needed to be dominant or submissive. I do get a little concerned when they have this whole "I know exactly what my kinks and limits are and what I need in a Mistress/Master/etc." when they've only fantasised about it and maybe played online. It's like someone thinking they know how to fight because they can kick ass on World of Warcraft.

I'm worried they're gonna get themselves hurt.

(in reply to VioletGray)

Post #: 30

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 8:20:36 AM

kdsub

Posts: 12180
Joined: 8/16/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

First, I'm going to welcome you to the forums. I hope you'll enjoy your stay.

I admit to getting snippy from time to time. It comes from answering the same question over, and over, and over. Here comes this person thinking that they have this truly original idea, but I've had the same discussion for ten years or more. While it's all brand new to them, to Me, it's tired, old hat.

New, as well as old, have to understand that people come from different perspectives here. That's the best answer that I have for you.

There is nothing more precious and rare on earth than a truly original thought...sometimes I wonder if I've ever had one...and if I did would I know it. I have though of this many times and come to the conclusion there are very few Einstein’s on this earth and I'm not one of them. Knowing my limitations has made me tolerant of others.

I am very patient in passing along knowledge I have accumulated, understanding that often this knowledge is a revelation to others and what makes their lives interesting.

I like helping…it lets me relive a little of the joy of discovery.

Butch

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 31

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 9:01:57 AM

LadyHibiscus

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There really ARE stupid questions. There are WAY too many trolls. I try hard to just ignore the trolls, or thank them for the giggle, if they give me one. I might point someone to the SEARCH FUNCTION or to Google, if they ask a really dumbass question along the lines of "I live in Dallas, where do I meet people?". Sometimes I control the sarcasm, sometimes I don't.

On the other side, I spend a lot of time sending people links and recommending events. Here, I try and offer useful advice if I think it's being asked for. I was lucky starting out and had many talented people teach me, and I want to pass that on.

This is not a happy place---come to Random Stupidity, and we'll share the love. The other forums? Well, if you think of life as a shark tank...

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Post #: 32

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 9:12:58 AM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

I think you find just as many "nice" answers as snippy.
Perhaps you focus on the negative because it bothers you overly much.
I used to actually care and get upset when someone on this forum was snippy with me (or just plain bitchy)
Now I take it in the spirit in which it was intended (which is often to

) and iggie it.
Find what YOU need, and throw out the rest.

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(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 33

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 9:36:25 AM

Wolffeman

Posts: 6
Joined: 2/25/2009
Status: offline

quote:

There are no stupid questions.

My feeling is this: the only stupid question is the one you don't ask. I have asked numerous questions that many would consider with "duh" as their response. Many times I already thought I had the answer, and yet I asked anyway. Sometimes clarification is needed, perhaps as nothing more than validation and vindication.

Do I get bored reading/answering the same questions asked by newbies? Yeah, I do...but I try to remember that, once upon a time, I was that newbie.

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Post #: 34

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 9:58:26 AM

Padriag

Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BoiJen

There are stupid questions and stupid people. I'm just clarifying that as a fact.

Amen!

I don't mind sincere questions... even if I've heard it asked 1,000 times before. I don't mind the naive questions. But there are some really stupid questions on here that people ought to consider more carefully before asking. Anyone who's been here for more than 6 months has seen them repeatedly. Things like:

"My online master hasn't communicated with me for 6 months... am I dumped?" Gee... ya think?

Or the equally inspired...

"My online slave isn't returning my phone calls anymore and won't answer emails... what should I do?" How about... "get a life"?

Or one of my personal favorites... the endless variations on...

"Why won't anyone respond to my emails / profile / chat requests / friends invites / etc. Why doesn't anyone like me?" Cause you're a whinning twit, try being an interesting human being for a change.

Yes indeed, there are stupid questions, there are stupid people... and sometimes they do incredibly stupid things. I'm all for encouraging growth, learning, etc. I've patiently answered more than a few newbie questions at length, and repeatedly. But I refuse to encourage, coddle, or pander to stupidity.

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(in reply to BoiJen)

Post #: 35

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 10:32:23 AM

Jeptha

Posts: 780
Joined: 9/18/2008
From: Portland, Oregon
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kitastrophe3;
...A great many comments are great, but I still do wish there was a more supportive, embracing attitude over all...Build each other up, rather than tear each other down with snide, condescending comments.

I find there's a pretty good balance, usually.

I prefer a little of the tart along with the sweet, myself.

I'm not really strong with the online empathy, but if I feel that someone's point of view isn't being given a fair chance, I'll try and put in a word to support their idea, if the words come readily to mind and I have the time.

Sometimes posters do focus too much on the negative. There was this one thread on the AskaMaster board where 99% of the responses were evenhanded or supportive, but the Original Poster focused on the one negative comment and huffed off stating "I knew I was wasting my time here", etc.

Waddaya do?

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Post #: 36

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 11:19:30 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

Using fast reply.......

Are we supposed to wait until they get old sinewy and tough, with very little meat on their bones? Even MY homemade BBQ sauce doesn't make that sound appetizing.

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Post #: 37

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 11:39:51 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I admit to getting snippy from time to time. It comes from answering the same question over, and over, and over. Here comes this person thinking that they have this truly original idea, but I've had the same discussion for ten years or more. While it's all brand new to them, to Me, it's tired, old hat.

Regards to you LadyPact.
My question to your response would be, why bother answering then? If a question is old hat, or boring and one can only respond with boredom or snippiness, why even worry about answering? If someone asks a fairly ridiculous question from a say 50 year old woman such as 'Master wants me to sign all I own over to him and change my will' or 'she doesn't want to use a condom but wont have a std test' then ok, I can see where the sarcasm or snippiness would happen. But because of boredom?

the.dark.

Hello the.dark. As always, My best to both you and Darcy.

Generally, it's because I don't intend for the answer to sound snippy. It may just have come across that way because I've said a certain thing so many times.

You ask a valid question with why bother. I've actually been asked the same thing in meatlife. (I'm not kidding about that one.) It's because some of the questions are worthwhile, even if they aren't particularly original. I had those same questions once. Of course, it took Me a little longer to find the answers because I wasn't exactly in on the ground floor of this internet thing, wonderful computer twit that I am.

Like you and many of the regulars here, I think we all bring our own certain flair to this thing. I'm not going to argue with the other contributors in this thread. Yes, there are stupid questions and there are stupid people. I admit to sitting on My side of the screen every now and again and wonder how in the hell (excuse My language) did the writer of the OP ever function in life, much less a kinky life? I'm probably going to call them on that, but I'm still going to answer their question. Why? Because they really might need the answer.

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Post #: 38

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 12:47:43 PM

sweetsub1957

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

~Quick Reply~
i try not to ever be snippy and apologize at the time in the event i think i might come across that way to some people. i really don't mean to unnecessarily hurt A/anyone's feelings. At the same time, i've done my share of asking things on the message boards and, yes, i've asked some "really dumbass questions" and had my own ass chewed a few times for it. LOL i figure i really deserved it, some of my original posts really were dumbass, and looking back on them i realize it and admit it. A couple times in particular it made me sit up and take notice and completely re-do my profile. You probably know Who You were that said it too. LOL ~smiles~ But then just after i thought i got it right, i changed the name because i was getting too much bad input on my username of all things.

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Post #: 39

RE: Kinksters eat their young. - 4/28/2009 12:57:40 PM

kitastrophe33

Posts: 85
Joined: 9/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

this is an ADULT sex site and there are going to be times when most replies around here will be brutally honest and blunt. if you cannot handle that, time find a lovey dovey site which better suits you.

Just for the record, I'm referring to my observations of how other people are responded to. And being an "adult" has little to do with my impression. I just don't see it as necessary to be an ass. Politeness and diplomacy are things "adults" have hopefully learned sometime over the years. And maybe some people do see this site as a pissing contest as opposed to a "community" of like-minded people. That's too bad too, because there is a wealth of knowledge here from people with a lot of experience and relevant knowledge that they could share with novices. *And* the input of a novice can actually be useful sometimes!

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 40

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