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RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 1:49:00 PM

stella41b

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From: SW London (UK)
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Wow. Another fakes thread. Here we go again..

I've been on here a few years and haven't come across any fakes, I just encounter people, some of them with piss poor communication and social skills who are clearly not up to being able to get to know other people online.

But there again I know that when I do make contact with other people via this site, or other such sites, that there's never any guarantee that anything meaningful at all is ever going to come of that contact.

There's a vast multitude of choices involved in being here, choosing to open an account, choosing to fill out a profile, choosing to upload photos, choosing to log in, choosing to make contact with others or respond to others attempting to make contact with you and you either accept what these people tell you about themselves and what they're seeking or you don't.

You know sometimes I wonder, and one of the things I wonder about is, if these people are so willing to limit their time and effort when making initial contact with others, then how much time and effort are they prepared to spend in developing a relationship, and are they also going to limit that time and effort?

The only tried and tested way of working out whether you can be with someone or not or actually work things out is to actually meet them face to face, and of course using your noggin to make that decision. This is how it's been for centuries, and this is how it's been also ever since people have had access to the Internet.

You can't always verify what someone says, very few are going to be that upfront and completely open and emotionally transparent but there's a lot to be said about taking the time and effort to get to know people and developing trust which in itself takes time.

Edited for sloppy word choices.

< Message edited by stella41b -- 6/8/2009 1:50:34 PM >

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Post #: 41

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 2:10:40 PM

Viridana

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hurkan1618

I know several people who have tried meeting people online (non BDSM). The online chatting went well and they decide to meet. Results were either the person misrepresented themselves physically or the person never showed/disappeared online. It was frustrating for them.

Imagine if you thought you were making a real connection with someone, agreed to meet, and come to find blatant physical misrepresentation. There is more to a person than physical appearance of course. However, if someone attracts you physically then turns out very different it shatters the trust in a way and taints whatever connection was developed.

What do you consider blatant physical misrepresentation? A woman who's 10 pounds heavier than she said, or someone who says she's pretty but to your own personal standards is a butter face? or are we talking about 50 year old sweaty guys representing themselves as 20 year old blonde bombshells?

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Post #: 42

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 2:11:02 PM

ShaharThorne

Posts: 11071
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I am not a fake yet I do not have access to a digital camera, a cell phone with a cam and I will not give out my number unless you prove to me that you have read my profile (journal too). 4 simple words are a turnoff, as well as distance (Turkey, UK and Egypt definitely). IF I get an educated mail, I will respond. That is just how I am.

Flaky on the other hand...that is part of my personality. I have several medical conditions and my meds knock me for a loop.

Shahar

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Post #: 43

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 2:12:48 PM

Asherdelampyr

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Viridana

[ or are we talking about 50 year old sweaty guys representing themselves as 20 year old blonde bombshells?

hey now, my hair is blonde-ish, and I have great cans :P

((couldnt resist))

My weight on here s probably grossly incorrect, since I guessed

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RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 3:22:40 PM

littlewonder

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hurkan1618

I know several people who have tried meeting people online (non BDSM). The online chatting went well and they decide to meet. Results were either the person misrepresented themselves physically or the person never showed/disappeared online. It was frustrating for them.

And? I've had that happen too. Never seemed that big a deal to me. I shrugged it off and either went home or called my friends to see if they wanted to do something.

I never saw it as a big loss on my part nor on their's. Just two people who just aren't compatible.

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Post #: 45

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 3:35:21 PM

JonnieBoy

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From: Cymru
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I have an idea ... try sending pm's asking the suspect fake if they're fake or not (perhaps a bit more tactfully than I ).

By the time you get tempted to do this ... save the finger excercise and move on.

Pirate

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Post #: 46

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 3:39:51 PM

Musicmystery

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Thing is, Pirate, I've actually seen profiles that specify "No fakes!"

I just imagine some guy reading along, actually reading her profile and then saying "Damn! She won't go for me because I'm fake!" and moving on.....

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Post #: 47

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 3:40:39 PM

JonnieBoy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: stella41b
I just encounter people, some of them with piss poor communication.

I promise not to drink the usual ammount of Vodka before I put the web cam on this time Stella.

Pirate

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Post #: 48

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 3:53:49 PM

JonnieBoy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Musicmystery

Thing is, Pirate, I've actually seen profiles that specify "No fakes!"

I just imagine some guy reading along, actually reading her profile and then saying "Damn! She won't go for me because I'm fake!" and moving on.....

good point, I think Fake should become a new "Preference" on the site, then the "fakes" would have a better chance of hooking up with the "not fakes" who are hiding their "fakeness" and then no REAL fakes (

) would go on there so we could all bugger off there and have a mass debate while they're still decyphering this post.

Pirate

< Message edited by JonnieBoy -- 6/8/2009 3:54:33 PM >

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Post #: 49

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 4:01:03 PM

Lockit

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I want to be a fake bitch when I grow up... this getting old really sucks and denial might be nice; although dementia has some fun moments, I could live without the sag and wrinkles.

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RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 4:08:19 PM

Phoenixpower

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaharThorne

4 simple words are a turnoff, as well as distance (...UK ... definitely).

wise choice

(wish I would have been that wise to avoid UK

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Post #: 51

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 5:05:53 PM

DarkSteven

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All right... I identify four different kinds of fakes:

1. Profiles set up to scam moronic men. Usually impressively beautiful black women from overseas in their early to mid 20s, badly misspelled, weight half what it should be. Sometimes these profiles are couples profiles because the idiots who set them up are barely computer literate. They will call you Master right away. One wrote me out of the blue and said she would do anything for me, so I told her to relocate to Colorado at her own expense. I haven't heard since. I wouldn't be surprised if there were male profiles set up to scam gay men as well.

2. Fake profiles for nonfinancial purposes. One is the "woman" chatting with a female who happens to know this great guy that she refers her to. The woman's profile is fake, set up by the man to provide a fake referral. And I've heard of men who set up female profiles for their own jollies.

3. Lying. The guy who adds three inches to his profile. The woman who subtracts eighty pounds from hers. The twelve year old photo.

4. This is highly subjective, but I've heard of people being called fakes because they're not Dom or sub according to someone else's standards. Obviously, it's an open question who's real and who's fake. I will say that I've seen sone "sub" profiles that are exceptionally strident about what they want, and I could not see that person being a submissive. I've also heard some women complain that psuedo-Doms told them they could not be a true submissive if they objected to anything whatsoever that the "Dom" said or did.

So which fake are we discussing here?

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RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 5:28:20 PM

DomImus

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Make it a breast only picture and I'll sign off on your note-phone cam pic idea.

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Post #: 53

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 8:44:53 PM

JonnieBoy

Posts: 1468
Joined: 4/22/2009
From: Cymru
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I have a 24" cock and it's getting frustrated ...... anyone know a supplier of fake hens ? (the foxes ate all the real ones just for the anal out there)

Pirate

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Post #: 54

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 8:54:04 PM

Lockit

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I have a feather pillow if that would help...

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Post #: 55

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/8/2009 9:31:57 PM

Arpig

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quote:

I simply asked if she had her camera available to take a face only picture and send it to me. She agreed. However, I gave her a 5 minute time limit to also write a message (I determined on the spot) on a piece of paper and have the message appear clearly within the frame. Confirmed.

Not a particularly new or original idea. People have been doing that for years and years. I was asked to provide just such proof nearly 10 years ago. I replied "If I was faking, don't you think I would have used a picture of a handsome man?"

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Post #: 56

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/9/2009 1:16:34 AM

BrokenSaint

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Tbh I don't think it's all that hard to determine whether someone is real or not. People tend to be..forgetful when they attempt to conceal their identity. The things they like, their writing style, various nicks they use, even people they talk to, hobbies, etc. All can be used to handily track whether someone is in fact an actual person (which well...that's a bit of a misnomer. Generally they're an actual person, otherwise they'd be rich as hell from passing the turing test. But you all know what I mean). Scammers are generally blatantly obvious, people playing games tend not to be good enough at said games, and eventually slip.

For some people, tracking the other down is actually a game. Like following a trail of breadcrumbs. Once quite a while ago, I was interested in a particular girl I met online. Neither of us knew identifying information about the other. Both of us were fairly skilled in comps and the net. She proposed the game, where we try to find out who the other is, based on information we already knew. We both succeeded, it was extremely fun, and informative. She had made the mistake of using a similar nick to one she had already used, as well as similar phrasing on various sites she'd written things on, and a domain name she had registered and hadn't used very often. Simple whois provided my win. I had made an error of using a snippet of a poem that I had published quite some time ago in one of my aim away messages, she tracked me down from that. After that we both took the steps to make finding out who we were more difficult. We're still friends :D.

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RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/9/2009 5:56:32 AM

lusciouslips19

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Fitznicely

Whatever happened to just talking with people?

As you get to know them, either things will ring true or they won't...

<---- Look, no piece of paper, I must be a fake!

Well if this was actually directed to me, thats what I suggest. I dont CAM, no IM and just write to me here where I am protected. I say to people,"I am on a site like this with its own e-mail system as a protection for all of us. WHy would I need to give someone my personal e-mail?" If they are willing to do that then we can have conversationsand get to know one another and yes. The fakes do weed out.

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Post #: 58

RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/9/2009 7:32:30 AM

lisatiffany

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From: Dublin/Ireland
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I imagine it must be extra tricky figuring out whos real in a country as big as the USA, here in Ireland the scene is so small that everyone really does know everyone else so if there were a fake roaming around or somone looking to meet for all the wrong reasons word would get around very quick. its the turkish guys that I get msg-ing me pretty much daily with buffed up pics stolen from porn sites, egyptians too. one of the best recent msgs was "so maybe we can meet for a coffee & talk about marrige ..are you free later tonight?", this bloke was about 10 countries away = )

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RE: An idea to weed out fakes - 6/9/2009 4:42:36 PM

aravain

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hurkan1618
However, if someone attracts you physically then turns out very different it shatters the trust in a way and taints whatever connection was developed.

How can they attract you physically when you haven't seen a picture of them before? Color me confused.

Personally I'd like this sort of thing, as long as you didn't tell me if was to prove I was real. Something like "Take a picture of yourself... write my username and a heart in it and show me a cute face ;)" would make me giddy and love to acquiesce. It's a sweet sort of nothing-gift that you can give someone... reminds me of friends on another website and how they would do that sort of thing for each other as a gift.

If it was presented as "To prove that you're a real person, write my username on a piece of paper and take a face picture with it readable and visible in the frame" I would likely respond back with a verbal bashing ;)

There's nothing wrong with showing pictures (I require it after a bit of talk, myself) to see if there's attraction, or even requesting a certain type of picture (or pose) from the potential partner. But as soon as you tell them flat out it's to 'prove they're not fake' then... well, that's just rude (and crude).

I'd probably ask for a similar picture back, though I'm a cheeky bastard I guess ;)

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Post #: 60

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