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RE: A very interesting question I found online :D - 6/17/2009 11:51:20 PM

WyldHrt

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quote:

I've been male for damn near 50 years and I couldn't tell you what most men think. It may come as a surprise to you, but we are not as dumb as we appear on TV, nor are we as one-dimensional. Every man is different, every man has his own take on things. /rant

Well said, Arpig! *smooch*

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RE: A very interesting question I found online :D - 6/18/2009 5:45:57 AM

Firebirdseeking

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Time out, please. we do not know how old these individuals are. They sound like they are in their 20's and they may not ever have really explored who they are, deep down.

I was once a female hell bent on being in charge, take charge, independent, self sufficient; there was a time i would be offended if a man opened a door for me. That was because I did not understand what was stirring deep down, and I bought the meal that society was serving me at that time.

Maybe she is like that too...just maybe. Many women are.

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RE: A very interesting question I found online :D - 6/18/2009 8:19:32 AM

sublace

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quote:

"Hi I'm Dan.

Well, hello there Dan

If this continues to be a concern, please call me (xxx) xxx-xxxx ASAP ...

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RE: A very interesting question I found online :D - 6/18/2009 8:47:18 AM

Andalusite

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Joined: 1/25/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: rednicky
And I'd hate it if I had a great guy and had a great relationship but he called it of after 3 years because I wasn't submissive enough. I keep asking myself "Would I compromise and be more submissive for him because I love him or would I stay defiant simply because of his attitude about my behavior?"

You *want* to be submissive, though, so being defiant is something you probably shouldn't feel toward a potential partner. Some guys do like a lot of resistance play, and some submissives need to have control wrested from them, but personally, I feel that submission is a reaction to/interaction with a specific person. If I didn't feel submissive toward my Master almost all of the time, or if I hadn't felt that way toward my previous Dominant, I wouldn't have pursued a power exchange relationship with either of them.

It sounds like the lady in question specifically has some issues surrounding male/female interactions. I've heard of a few women actively disliking having doors held for them, but haven't run into any myself. It sounds like she had some bad experiences, or was specifically raised to take a hyper-independent/individualistic approach, and feel it's weak to accept any concessions or courtesies based on gender.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst
They don't open doors, give away seats on buses, allow someone to walk in first, ect, at least not as much as they used to when I was much younger. Since moving to the upper part of the state here in Ca I haven't noticed a lot of traditional gentlemen types.

Hmm, here in the Bay Area, most men who are strangers do all of the above! I had a few guys I went on dates with who didn't open doors - it isn't a dealbreaker, but I do prefer it. My Master usually does, but sometimes it's more practical for me to get it myself, or hold it for him.

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RE: A very interesting question I found online :D - 6/18/2009 9:28:38 AM

agirl

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ORIGINAL: rednicky
And I'd hate it if I had a great guy and had a great relationship but he called it of after 3 years because I wasn't submissive enough. I keep asking myself "Would I compromise and be more submissive for him because I love him or would I stay defiant simply because of his attitude about my behavior?"

And there's another way.....if you AGREE, create , discuss and WANT a situation where you behave a certain way. This has nothing to do with some kind of *deliberate defiance* in a mutually agreed situation.

If she's oblivious to what he's wanting and bemoaning, surely she's meandering on her way, being herself?

You don't have to BE more submissive, or more anything.....It looks as though her hands are tied because nowhere has it been mentioned that he's ASKED her to be some kind of submissive, in role or action.

Why on earth should she? He's been perfectly content until now.....It's just a lot of silliness.

agirl

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