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ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

From either the D or the "s" perspective how faithfull are instructions, suggestions, or orders followed when on line with no actual ability to determine if they have been performed?

CP

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ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

During a recent convo this subject came up for discussion and the different responses / applications that may come up with a relationship whether it is real time, on line or a mixture of both depending on the relationship. Thus I present this perplexing problem to the vast knowledged that is displayed here on a daily basis........... errrrrrr pretty smart anyway.

From either the D or the "s" perspective how faithfull are instructions, suggestions, or orders followed when on line with no actual ability to determine if they have been performed?

CP

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how faithfull are instructions, suggestions, or orders followed when on line with no actual ability to determine if they have been performed?

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ORIGINAL: aldompdx

The premise of your question is based on the false assumption that your personal experience is caused by the conduct of your partner.

Consider the issue from the perspective that your experience arises from your own heart, and whatever your partner chooses to share can inspire the amplification of what is already there.

Trust in another is irrelevant. Really, you are trusting your own degree of confidence. Then based on your own confidence, you allow your own feelings to come forth.

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ORIGINAL: krikket

Trust is the key, for both the D and the s.   During the one on-line (only) relationship i've been involved in, i did what i was told simply because i trusted him, a trust that was built over time, and because it didn't occur to me not to obey him.  i knew that he wouldn't ask me to do anything that would be harmful and that, in many cases, his requests helped me to learn and grow in a safe relationship.  i've taken a lot of flak over the years from those who said it couldn't possibly be a "real" relationship so it's not something i speak of often.  i know that i won't convince others any more than they will make me think it was less than real.  Is a face-to-face relationship better than on-line?  i believe that on many levels it is, but at that particular time in my life he was what i needed, and it was the only way it was possible.  The biggest drawback to that relationship was his sometimes distrust of me.  Since this was before the days of cheap cams and scanners were too expensive and eventually it became apparent that i couldn't offer him the proof he seemed to need. 

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Trust is the key, for both the D and the s. During the one on-line (only) relationship i've been involved in, i did what i was told simply because i trusted him, a trust that was built over time, and because it didn't occur to me not to obey him. i knew that he wouldn't ask me to do anything that would be harmful and that, in many cases, his requests helped me to learn and grow in a safe relationship. i've taken a lot of flak over the years from those who said it couldn't possibly be a "real" relationship so it's not something i speak of often. i know that i won't convince others any more than they will make me think it was less than real. Is a face-to-face relationship better than on-line? i believe that on many levels it is, but at that particular time in my life he was what i needed, and it was the only way it was possible. The biggest drawback to that relationship was his sometimes distrust of me. Since this was before the days of cheap cams and scanners were too expensive and eventually it became apparent that i couldn't offer him the proof he seemed to need.

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ORIGINAL: LadyPact

In My case with clip, I'd say the chances are pretty good.  On more than one occasion, I've had people in other locations send Me unsolicited comments on how he's behaved at different lifestyle functions in other areas.  Even without My intending it, they've told Me that he's followed his instructions on various things.  I appreciate these types of notes quite a bit.

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In My case with clip, I'd say the chances are pretty good. On more than one occasion, I've had people in other locations send Me unsolicited comments on how he's behaved at different lifestyle functions in other areas. Even without My intending it, they've told Me that he's followed his instructions on various things. I appreciate these types of notes quite a bit.

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ORIGINAL: GeekFreak

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ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

From either the D or the "s" perspective how faithfull are instructions, suggestions, or orders followed when on line with no actual ability to determine if they have been performed?

CP

Cams can give some ability to determine if things have been performed, but of course that is only for specific orders that are to be done right then and there in front of you.

As for other orders, with my partner, they were not followed extremely faithfully at first. Sometimes they were ignored, but that would usually be admitted to me if asked. As time went on, and we grew closer, she would follow through much more often. I honestly feel anytime she doesn't follow through now is only by mistake (forgetfulness) and I'm always told about the failure so that it can be rectified/discussed. I can't prove this, but there have been many evidences that lead me to this belief...enough that I'm satisfied with my certainty on this issue.

Regarding the average couple: I have little faith in most, and figure there are often secrets hidden, rules not followed, and other general douchebaggery. I think this is usually the same group of people who would suck in in-person relationship too, though. :P

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Cams can give some ability to determine if things have been performed, but of course that is only for specific orders that are to be done right then and there in front of you.

As for other orders, with my partner, they were not followed extremely faithfully at first. Sometimes they were ignored, but that would usually be admitted to me if asked. As time went on, and we grew closer, she would follow through much more often. I honestly feel anytime she doesn't follow through now is only by mistake (forgetfulness) and I'm always told about the failure so that it can be rectified/discussed. I can't prove this, but there have been many evidences that lead me to this belief...enough that I'm satisfied with my certainty on this issue.

Regarding the average couple: I have little faith in most, and figure there are often secrets hidden, rules not followed, and other general douchebaggery. I think this is usually the same group of people who would suck in in-person relationship too, though. :P

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ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

I have always obeyed.
On line instructions are no different than being in another room, out of the house or away on business  or holiday and having to comply. Trust is trust.

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I have always obeyed.
On line instructions are no different than being in another room, out of the house or away on business or holiday and having to comply. Trust is trust.

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ORIGINAL: aldompdx


Trust in another is irrelevant. Really, you are trusting your own degree of confidence. Then based on your own confidence, you allow your own feelings to come forth.