Phoenixpower
Posts: 8098
Status: offline
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just found this text on the fb-page from a dear friend, when she rumbled about her zoo full of cats....so thought to bring it on here DEAR CATS - The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate of food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find it aesthetically pleasing in the slightest. The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and it is not a Formula One race track. Racing me to the bottom is not the objective. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can... run. There is no point racing to the phone or weaving in front of me when I am trying to get to the phone unless you plan on answering it. I cannot buy anything bigger than a kingsize bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the sofa to ensure your comfort, however. Cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on each end to maximise apace taken is nothing but SARCASM. For the last time, THERE IS NO SECRET EXIT FROM THE BATHROOM! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the handle or get your paw under the door in an attempt to open it. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years, feline attendance is not required. The proper order for kissing is, Kiss me first, then go smell the other cats butt. I cannot stress this enough. Mopping and cleaning the floor does not constitute the need for you to vomit up a furr ball. Neither is it required when visitors come. And Finally, the fridge is not the great white god in the kitchen that you need to sit in front of and look adoringly at.
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RIP 08-09-07 The PAST is history, the FUTURE a mystery, NOW is a gift - that's why it's called the PRESENT www.butyoudontlooksick.com/navigation/BYDLS-TheSpoonTheory.pdf
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