RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (Full Version)

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tazzygirl -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 4:46:31 PM)

ORIGINAL: ishyB

quote:

~FR~

Who here has never lied before?

Did nobody here ever did stupid things as a kid?

Did nobody here ever had a beer before there were old enough to drink?

Did nobody here ever went to a bar before they were 21?

Did nobody here ever drove a car when they had a couple beers?

Did nobody here ever tried cigarettes before they were 21?

Did nobody here ever tried drugs, or smoked pot?

Did nobody here ever try to drive a car, on a dirt road, before they had a license?

Did nobody here ever had sex before they reached the age of consent?

Did nobody here ever saw a movie that they were to young to watch?

Really, I feel like a terrible terrible person now, because I did at least some of the stuff on that list...


And when you were caught doing any of those things, were you not punished?

I know i certainly was.  Consider this her punishment.  Allowing her to go unchecked will only cause more and more to believe there is nothing  wrong with her actions.  MSN closed their chat because of this exact issue.  Yahoo restricted their on line access because of this.  Adults patting children on the head and telling them "its ok, i used to do that" isnt helping either.




RedMagic1 -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 4:47:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord
My apologies to thee, but, hey, when dealing with children...

Your attitude -- and the attitude of other strident people on this thread -- indicates that you are not seriously looking to date a woman in her late teens off this site.

To anyone over the age of 30 interested in picking up young chicks, it is good to bear in mind that people try a lot of things in their teen years, and young women often look for older men who can teach them things about life in a non-judgmental way.  Act like a self-righteous know-it-all, and you're not likely to buy coffee for someone under 21.  Act like an authority figure who remembers what being young is like, and, well, booyaaaa.




HerLord -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 4:50:44 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

And to think that there is a world where people think it is ok to try and find an insulting word.

the.dark.



I never pretended to be OK. I never pretended to be nice. In fact, not one time in a single post I have EVER made, have I pretended to be any thing. Dislike me for my cruelty or incivilities if it so strikes you. I also never asked to be liked. I have mine, and it is my job to protect it. If the likes of these are repetitively permitted, how can I be assured that this site is a minor free zone? I don't post a lot any more, for I wish to not offend the likes of the Dark and others, whose opine i regard highly, but I do get hostile and mean when I get a topic that risks me and or mine. So for those of you who don't like my methods, your problem.

Block me. I am still me. I am still an unbearable ass. I am still defending mine.




HerLord -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 4:58:32 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord
My apologies to thee, but, hey, when dealing with children...

Your attitude -- and the attitude of other strident people on this thread -- indicates that you are not seriously looking to date a woman in her late teens off this site.

To anyone over the age of 30 interested in picking up young chicks, it is good to bear in mind that people try a lot of things in their teen years, and young women often look for older men who can teach them things about life in a non-judgmental way.  Act like a self-righteous know-it-all, and you're not likely to buy coffee for someone under 21.  Act like an authority figure who remembers what being young is like, and, well, booyaaaa.


In fact you are correct. I am NOT looking to date any one more than ten years my youth. If you had cared to punctuate your point with a little oomph, you might have checked my profile to see, that I state quite clearly the ages of the folks we are interested in meeting with the handy dandy little number fill in er box thingy at the VERY first thing we fill out in what we are looking for. Sorry I was mistaken... gender comes first.

MY attitude is very clear. MINORS GO AWAY! Don't come here. YOU'RE NOT WELCOME HERE! I will personally attack and berate as much as i can until this site boots me for you being here. And when they do, I will then attack them and berate them in court. Assuming of course that they take the path of fucking with me for defending MY LEGAL recourses and well... wants. So again, to all minors. FUCK you and the horse/lie you wrote to get here.




RCdc -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 4:59:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord


quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord
By her own admissions she was TRYING to score with some one from this site as a minor... how can you possibly be so... can't find a word insulting enough, to think that there is a world where that is ok?


And to think that there is a world where people think it is ok to try and find an insulting word.

the.dark.
(.whohasbeenreadingthiscarcrashofathreadandwonderingwhoexactlyis'matureandgrownup'again.)

It aint me... not growed up at all.Shame to have offended the likes of the Dark. My apologies to thee, but, hey, when dealing with children...


I am not 'offended' and I certainly neither deserve any apology, nor do I desire one,  but so called grown people dissing and ridiculing a 'child' for acting irresponible whilst showing irresponsible behaviour?  Not my thing.

You have said it yourself.  You are treating her as a child - consider 'dealing with children'.  Fair enough.
So trying to find a word to insult a 'child'?
Really?
Need I say anymore?

the.dark.




HerLord -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 5:04:20 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

You have said it yourself.  You are treating her as a child - consider 'dealing with children'.  Fair enough.
So trying to find a word to insult a 'child'?
Really?
Need I say anymore?

the.dark.

That was not to said minor, that was to those fools defending and coddling her all the while saying..."It's ok that you could have cost some the rest of thier life, it's ok that you might have gotten the worlds most respected lifestyle site shutdown, it's ok that you didn't know any better... Now now little one. Let's make all the wrongs of the world up and vanish in our welcoming arms and let us rid you of your accountability."

NAY fuck me NAY i say. That was to the them that allows this to continue.




lilmisssubmiss -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 5:32:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

I see her at the top of the forum, and she hasn't said anything lately, so maybe she went out shopping for her costume and just left the thread up.

God, I hope she buys a mature adult costume.

Ron

that's what i did!! i got a sailor outfit!! its so cute!!!! :D:D:D. look SOOO good.





lilmisssubmiss -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 5:33:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ishyB

~FR~

Who here has never lied before?

Did nobody here ever did stupid things as a kid?

Did nobody here ever had a beer before there were old enough to drink?

Did nobody here ever went to a bar before they were 21?

Did nobody here ever drove a car when they had a couple beers?

Did nobody here ever tried cigarettes before they were 21?

Did nobody here ever tried drugs, or smoked pot?

Did nobody here ever try to drive a car, on a dirt road, before they had a license?

Did nobody here ever had sex before they reached the age of consent?

Did nobody here ever saw a movie that they were to young to watch?

Really, I feel like a terrible terrible person now, because I did at least some of the stuff on that list...

As to "endangering" this site and everybody on it...
It seems to me that publicly making this big of a circus about the whole issue is doing more to endanger the site than anything the OP ever did.
She never went to flaunt the fact that she was underage before she was pressed publicly for an answer on it.
If the real, serious, concern was that she might have been underage, it seems to me that, in the name of the safety of the site, such a matter should have been handled privately by those concerned about it... perhaps followed by reporting the issue to the CM administration.

Further, as to endangering men and being "jailbait."

There are many places within the US and the rest of the world where the age of sexual consent is not the same as the age upon one reaches maturity.
In many countries and States, the age of consent is 17, or even as low as 16 (Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Connecticut, District of Columbia, Georgia, Hawaii, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, Montana, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, North Carolina, Ohio, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina, South Dakota, Vermont, Washington, West Virginia for example, or in the whole of Canada.)
Also, in many places, if the adult engaging in sexual relations with a person under the age of consent has reasonable grounds to belief that said minor was old enough to consent (reasonable grounds being things like the minor looking older than they are, and them lying about their age) then the adult will not face criminal charges.
Perhaps some people here are dramatising the whole issue a bit?

That is not to say that I don't think the OP made a mistake, she did... only, I feel most of us out there might have made some mistakes growing up, right?
So maybe, just maybe, she isn't the worst person on the planet after all...

I wish you all well,

ishy



lol thank you<3




Andalusite -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 5:38:03 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

quote:

ORIGINAL: ishyB
Also, in many places, if the adult engaging in sexual relations with a person under the age of consent has reasonable grounds to belief that said minor was old enough to consent (reasonable grounds being things like the minor looking older than they are, and them lying about their age) then the adult will not face criminal charges.
Perhaps some people here are dramatising the whole issue a bit?

 
The age of concent of a minor may be with another miner, I do not know, but could be different with an adult.


I believe the ages ishy quoted are for sex with an adult, there tends to be some leeway for minors and people who are just over 18, but it varies from state to state. If lilmisssubmiss has posted any naked pictures of herself from before she turned 18, she can herself be prosecuted for distributing child pornography, and anyone in possession of the photos, even just in the cache from browsing her profile, can also be charged.




ishyB -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 5:44:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord

many places have a different age of consent. Agreed.
Absolutely correct.

But... the facts are the facts. She lied. She "JAILBATED" herself willingly and knowingly to those who use this site conditionally that it be fucking MINOR GODDAM FREE! So how about instead of... oh she's not the worst person in the world... crap. we... as conditional users of this ADULT fucking site, we admonish and repeal her admission to this site on the basis that she VIOLATED a contract she electronically signed to be a member here... THAT SHE WAS LEGAL!

No poor her, she had the big mean wolves of the really real internet call her a LIAR, (names) and berate for her lack of give a fuck about anything but her wants...

So.. the whole issue of it's legal some fucking where else has ZERO fucking bearing on it being CONTRACTUALLY ILLEGAL here!

I am sorry that you think that only the public Gasey's should be arrested. I am also sorry that she feels no ill will about the danger you seem to be minimizing she put herself in, and the THREAT she posed to this site and in particular this sites members by POSING as and adult and potentially intentionally getting some one arrested.

By her own admissions she was TRYING to score with some one from this site as a minor... how can you possibly be so... can't find a word insulting enough, to think that there is a world where that is ok?


Greetings,

It's not that I minimize the fact that what she did was wrong, it's only that I feel that the offence she committed does not warrant the public lapidation she has had to endure here. I'm merely suggesting that, if it is to anybodies concern here that she violated the TOS, then it is your personal right -and duty according to the TOS- to report the matter to the CM administration.
Further, I belief that another of CM's policies has always been that they do not stand for users publicly chastising, insulting or humiliation other users, for any reason, regardless of how justified they feel it is.

The fact that CM does not accept minors on this site has nothing to do with the risk she posed to individuals in the form of "jailbaiting."
As you noted: the age of consent is not the same in every place, and also, if a person sleeping with a minor has reasonable grounds to assume the person was of the age of consent, they will not be at risk.
Internet logs where the minor states they are 18 will usually be sufficient to establish a reasonable belief that the minor was able to consent, as will the testimony of the minor stating they lied.
In any event, she has not even met anybody from CM who she engaged in sexual activities with -that we know of.
If she would have done such a thing, it is perfectly possible that the situation would have been perfectly legal, depending on the location where the acts took place.
So basically, she is being chastised -at least partially- for acts she didn't even commit (or we at least have seen no evidence of).
If it is really necessary to blame people for acts they might ever have committed... well... lets just start trowing out accusations to everybody then...

As to the risk she put herself in...
I honestly belief that is her own business to do so, it doesn't affect anybody else here, so really should not be considered offencive to anybody here. It might be stupid of her, but many people -and minors- do stupid things that puts themself at risk, without that causing other people to go on a rampage about it.
Also, the legality of her age of maturity and consent does not change anything in regards to the risk she put herself in. It is not because she had her birthday and became 18 that she suddenly has less risk in meeting strangers she met online. Maturity might reduce the risk, but that has little to do with an arbitrary legal line in the sand. Many people might be mature enough to handle such a situation before they turn 18, as well as there will be many people who will not be mature enough to handle such a situation after they become 18.

I wish to state again that I do not feel that what the OP did was the right thing to do. I do not find it excusable that she broke the legal contract with CM when she lied about her age. I do feel that there should be a consequence to her action. I find the suggestion that has been made that she would first contact the CM administration to talk about the issue is a good one. I also feel that her being banned from this website is a justifiable action for the site administration to take, should they wish to do so.
I also feel that if you really feel that it is your duty to report her to the police, you should do everything in your power to take said action yourself.
Her action was certainly illegal, against the TOS, deceptive, immature and morally questionable.
However, in my oppinion, the response she got from some members was also against the TOS, immature and morally questionable.
I've never know two wrongs to make a right, and I am merely suggesting that if this whole thing is of such importance to some people, they should take the appropriate actions, instead of the inappropriate ones.

I wish you well,

ishy




mnottertail -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 5:46:46 PM)

at 18 I am in for statutory rape in minnesota due to the age difference, and at 21 I can fuck em like I own em.

many states are like that, and have varying laws based on the ages of each partner in the crime.

dunno about the camming law, and kiddie porn in minnesota, since I never get off watching that which I cannot get my grubby little hands on.





ModeratorEleven -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 5:51:54 PM)

Ok folks.  While we appreciate everyone being indignant on our behalf, you can stop now and let this get back to the original topic.  

Thank you,

XI





HerLord -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 5:53:56 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ishyB
Greetings,

It's not that I minimize the fact that what she did was wrong, it's only that I feel that the offence she committed does not warrant the public lapidation she has had to endure here. I'm merely suggesting that, if it is to anybodies concern here that she violated the TOS, then it is your personal right -and duty according to the TOS- to report the matter to the CM administration.
Further, I belief that another of CM's policies has always been that they do not stand for users publicly chastising, insulting or humiliation other users, for any reason, regardless of how justified they feel it is.

The fact that CM does not accept minors on this site has nothing to do with the risk she posed to individuals in the form of "jailbaiting."
As you noted: the age of consent is not the same in every place, and also, if a person sleeping with a minor has reasonable grounds to assume the person was of the age of consent, they will not be at risk.
Internet logs where the minor states they are 18 will usually be sufficient to establish a reasonable belief that the minor was able to consent, as will the testimony of the minor stating they lied.

As to the risk she put herself in...
I honestly belief that is her own business to do so, it doesn't affect anybody else here, so really should not be considered offencive to anybody here. It might be stupid of her, but many people -and minors- do stupid things that puts themself at risk, without that causing other people to go on a rampage about it.
Also, the legality of her age of maturity and consent does not change anything in regards to the risk she put herself in. It is not because she had her birthday and became 18 that she suddenly has less risk in meeting strangers she met online. Maturity might reduce the risk, but that has little to do with an arbitrary legal line in the sand. Many people might be mature enough to handle such a situation before they turn 18, as well as there will be many people who will not be mature enough to handle such a situation after they become 18.

I wish to state again that I do not feel that what the OP did was the right thing to do. I do not find it excusable that she broke the legal contract with CM when she lied about her age. I do feel that there should be a consequence to her action. I find the suggestion that has been made that she would first contact the CM administration to talk about the issue is a good one. I also feel that her being banned from this website is a justifiable action for the site administration to take, should they wish to do so.
I also feel that if you really feel that it is your duty to report her to the police, you should do everything in your power to take said action yourself.
Her action was certainly illegal, against the TOS, deceptive, immature and morally questionable.
However, in my oppinion, the response she got from some members was also against the TOS, immature and morally questionable.
I've never know two wrongs to make a right, and I am merely suggesting that if this whole thing is of such importance to some people, they should take the appropriate actions, instead of the inappropriate ones.

I wish you well,

ishy


Now I almost feel guilty for having notified my lawyer. Now I feel almost guilty for being an ass. But only almost. TOS states I am not allowed to attack and belittle members, since her contract IS void AND illegal, I have not attacked a member. I "tried" to find an insult for a member, but did not, so... where's the fucking violation... Oh yeah... I think it had some thing to do with her being here... just a hunch.




HerLord -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 5:56:03 PM)

Joy... finally the mods are here...

So MoD... My question is where do I line up to press joint charges, or should I redirect them at the site?




RedMagic1 -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 6:02:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmisssubmiss
i got a sailor outfit!! its so cute!!!! :D:D:D. look SOOO good.

Well, I'd like to see you in it![;)]

I don't know if you saw, but I did try to answer your question seriously, a few pages ago.  Short version: yes, you're being strung along.




lilmisssubmiss -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 6:20:00 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmisssubmiss
i got a sailor outfit!! its so cute!!!! :D:D:D. look SOOO good.

Well, I'd like to see you in it![;)]

I don't know if you saw, but I did try to answer your question seriously, a few pages ago.  Short version: yes, you're being strung along.



haha i'm sure a lot of people would like to see me in it.. i'm usually really hard on myself also and i know this looks ok:) i was just way excited:).

And yes, thank you. i saw it. i don't know i'm going to continue talking to them. not put all my eggs in one basket... and see where it goes. he promises he's going to get me to come out here we will see how it goes. i mean if i haven't met them by jan..then i'll stop talking to them.

but, at this point in my life

i am 18
i'm a freshmen in college having the time of my life.. i probably shouldn't even be missing any college to see them...but we will see how it goes..not like i should be in a huge rush. i just don't have patience all the time when i should.




HerLord -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 6:37:56 PM)

OK... so I have been informed that no action will take place to protect the LEGAL members of this site with out some form of direct order from a law enforcing entity. So. this to me, means, "You're on your own to defend your rights and legal issues that we made a promise to protect in the context of minors being allowed on our site." Sure All minors are welcome as long as you lie to us about it. And there will be NO repercussions for you or any one who deceives us and falsifies an electronically signed contract.

Good luck to all,

until this poster sees evidence that this site will protect me from the dangers of pedophilia and all charges related... I will be using another site for my interests.

edited cause I still can't type.






VideoAdminAlpha -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 6:42:14 PM)

Well , I was  going to respond with :

If you would like to continue to discuss this further it would be best if you would write support directly. There is no possibility of you getting any resolution here.

However, you seem to have found the resolution that works for you.

edited to be clearer 




RedMagic1 -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 6:46:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmisssubmiss
i probably shouldn't even be missing any college to see them.

No, you shouldn't.  One indication of how serious they are (or aren't) is whether they are willing to visit you, and keep things Platonic when they visit.  They have enough money to remodel their home for months.  A round-trip ticket to Boise from most anywhere in the continental US is less than $300.  Not exactly impossible to swing, for someone with the dough for construction work.  I think you should invest your time with people who can put their money where their mouth is.




RedMagic1 -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 6:49:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: VideoAdminAlpha
However, you seem to have found the resolution that works for you.

Uh, Alpha?  Dude's still on line.  There's a recent precedent for that, of course.




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