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RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 10:40:02 AM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rule

The concept 'race' has no meaning a modern biology. It has been established that the genetic variations within populations are larger than those between populations.

As for me: I favor 'cute'.


You're right.

And your point is?

It certainly has meaning in modern psychology and sociology.

It exists in the minds of men and women--therefore it exists.

(in reply to Rule)
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RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 10:48:07 AM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

quote:

The Afro-centric side of me prefers to see Blacks with other Blacks, and thinks that increases in interracial dating tend to benefit white men more than anyone else


Maybe it's just the circles I run in, but the majority of interracial couples I know are white women/black men.



Maybe it is.

It's hard to know anything from our own, personal, anecdotal observations.

For example, although statistically more black men than black women marry outside of their race, I don't personally know any black man with a white wife.

My wife, though, has black female "friends" (using the term loosely) with white husbands.

Anyway, I was theorizing as to the effects of an increase in interracial dating--not describing interracial dating as it exists at this moment.

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 102
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 10:51:00 AM   
Justme696


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rule

The concept 'race' has no meaning a modern biology. It has been established that the genetic variations within populations are larger than those between populations.

As for me: I favor 'cute'.



Race does have a place in modern science. Race is not a negative word.
It has been used for negative things, that is why it is mostly avoided.
Belonging to a different race ( what ever 'race"means) doesn't mean you are less or better. It mostly means you look different...is that bad? Not in my opinion.

(in reply to Rule)
Profile   Post #: 103
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 11:09:39 AM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DomImus

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan


quote:

ORIGINAL: DomImus

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSean69

2. Preference has nothing to do with Race....  Big, little, short, tall, black hair, blonde hair, small breast, Big breast, trimmed, shaved; these are preferences......


Total semantic gibberish. I choose to date tall women. I choose brunettes over blondes and redheads. I choose women with large busts over flat chested women. I choose to date white women. All choices based on what I prefer hence they are preferences.



Well, actually, THAT is the semantic gibberish.

Choosing to date white women may be your "preference," but that "preference" may well be grounded in your prejudices.

On the other hand, if you're a white man and you "choose" to date white women, I am totally down with that.

Even if it is grounded in a prejudice.


Good points all. That preference may well indeed be grounded in prejudice. And it may not. If we assume that someone's choice to date only within their race is based on an underlying prejudice - which I thought was the underlying point the OP was trying to make - we are actually only displaying our own prejudice.



I'm not sure I get your point.

But let me say this:

In my (not-so-humble) opinion, whites who say they only date other whites are more likely to be acting out of a prejudice towards non-whites than are minorities who say they only date people of their own race.

Attitudes, ideologies and practices of white supremacy tend to manifest themselves through the exclusion of non-whites (e.g., "Whites Only segregation").

Minorities who only date others of their own race tend to be acting out of a sense of racial solidarity, not out of a sense of prejudice towards those who are not members of their race.

When a Jewish mother admonishes her daughter to "find a nice Jewish boy" to marry, she's not (necessarily) acting out of or demonstrating a prejudice towards non-Jews.

She's (more likely) acting out of a sense of solidarity with other Jews and her Jewish heritage.

If a white mother told her son to be sure to "marry a white girl," she's more likely acting out of a sense of prejudice towards non-whites than acting out of a sense of solidarity with other whites.

Minorities tend to feel a need to act in solidarity with one another, because they're minorities.

Whites tend to not feel that need--because they're the majority.

So, my point is, that people can do the same thing (only date others of their own race), but for very different reasons.

(in reply to DomImus)
Profile   Post #: 104
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 12:11:43 PM   
sirsholly


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quote:


In my (not-so-humble) opinion, whites who say they only date other whites are more likely to be acting out of a prejudice towards non-whites than are minorities who say they only date people of their own race.

Attitudes, ideologies and practices of white supremacy tend to manifest themselves through the exclusion of non-whites (e.g., "Whites Only segregation").

Minorities who only date others of their own race tend to be acting out of a sense of racial solidarity, not out of a sense of prejudice towards those who are not members of their race.

When a Jewish mother admonishes her daughter to "find a nice Jewish boy" to marry, she's not (necessarily) acting out of or demonstrating a prejudice towards non-Jews.

She's (more likely) acting out of a sense of solidarity with other Jews and her Jewish heritage.

If a white mother told her son to be sure to "marry a white girl," she's more likely acting out of a sense of prejudice towards non-whites than acting out of a sense of solidarity with other whites.

Minorities tend to feel a need to act in solidarity with one another, because they're minorities.

Whites tend to not feel that need--because they're the majority.

Just where, may i ask, did you get your information on the thought process of white mothers as opposed to Jewish mothers?


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(in reply to Blaakmaan)
Profile   Post #: 105
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 12:53:41 PM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan

Then, there are those Blacks, whites, and Asians who only date outside their race.

I don't find anything particularly laudible about that, either.

I think that to eschew dating people of your own race, and to only date people of another race, is also kinda twisted.

It's rejecting your own race.

And, if you're a minority and you only date outside of your race, I think that's more than just kinda twisted. I think that's very twisted.


Blaakmaan,

i don't find anything troublesome about what's been stated. however, i do know many that date exclusively outside of their race often do so for a variety of reasons. one being a lack of acceptance amongst their own, especially where differences are perceived. the habitual nature of quantifying other people's ethnicity according to speech, dress, cuisine, education, interests, racial issues, etc. are often contributing factors for interracial dating in my opinion. what is most troubling is that the commentary isn't merely relegated to adults but is often articulated by children as well. the refusal for some to accept and respect individualism has only fueled the desire to seek other options, where things of this nature are nonexistent or rarely uttered.

porcelaine



I won't deny that sometimes being or feeling ostracized by one's own race is the reason that a person will only date outside of his or her race.
I just don't think that's the reason most of the time.

(in reply to porcelaine)
Profile   Post #: 106
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 1:01:43 PM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Fnordstrum

I would say that if you don't date a specific race, if it's simply because you just don't find people of that race attractive, then it's not racism. (Some people are just really picky when it comes to what they find attractive, etc)

However any other reason, I would say falls under racism... Or at least I can't think of anything that wouldn't be.

Fnord.

¤¤¤¤¤¤¤



That begs the question, which is why one would consistently find or feel or believe that one particular race--or every race but one's own--is not attractive, but another race is.

That could, and often is, what's rooted in either feelings of racism or racial superiority.

What about persons who only date outside of their own race?

They don't find their own race attractive?

They're so picky about whom they date that none of their own race qualify?

What would you call that???

Finally, if I am considering whom to date, am I really asking myself if I consider that race attractive, or whether I consider that person attractive?

I would hope I would be asking myself whether I find that particular person attractive, not their entire race.

(in reply to Fnordstrum)
Profile   Post #: 107
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 1:06:13 PM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSean69

"<b>Semantic Gibberish"</i>.... Such a great <b>CHOICE</b> of words....  Which do you prefer to be call Black, African American or a Nigger? 

Choose <b>( Choice)</b>which and then tell me why you Prefer  <b>(Preference)</b> one over the other.  

One Black Man to another..... This is why I would just "prefer" to be called an American and other "choose" to call me an African American, Black Man or a Nigger.



Hmmmmm...

One black man to another, I'd much prefer to be called either African-American or Black.

I would have quite a problem with being called "nigger," and I think that most sane people would not make that mistake.
There's no contradiction between being called American or Black or African-American.

I'm all three.

(in reply to MasterSean69)
Profile   Post #: 108
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 1:09:36 PM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: HisBestGirl

FR-

My mother is Malaysian-born Chinese and my father is Caucasian Australian. I was born in Australia, raised in a very Caucasian area, spent much of my early childhood being made to feel different, despite the fact that I am pretty much Western culturally, because to Westerners, I don't look white enough and to Asians, I don't look Asian enough. Nobody believes me when I tell them I am partly Chinese. My mother's family continue to live in Malaysia and I have had very little influence from that side of my family.

I have pretty much dated only white men, not from any particular preference. Perhaps one could draw a conclusion regarding the notion that one is drawn to a significant other due to the similarities shared between them and their parent of the opposite sex. Of course that is not a hard and fast rule; I have dated black men and Asian men but for some reason, I always end up with white men. I love redheads in particular, perhaps because they are rare, but possibly also because I read a trashy romance novel when I was 11 where a dashing copper-haired earl fell in love with a beautiful mixed-race pagan princess. A girl can dream...



Well, I can't speak to your particular mindset.

However, if I, as a Black man, dreamt of blue-eyed blondes, and always "ended up" with white women, I would have to ask myself what was going on with me.

I'm just sayin'...

(in reply to HisBestGirl)
Profile   Post #: 109
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 1:12:43 PM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: wandersalone

My story is similar to yours HisBestGirl, I was born in Australia but I obviously look Indian.  I have mostly dated white men primarily because they are the men that have been around me and my friends.  It didn't start out as a preference but it probably is one now mainly because that is mostly what I know.

Um just for the record though.....I am an equal opportunity white man dater - I have dated Brits, Irish, an American, a Canadian, a Scott and of course a number of Aussies




"An equal opportunity white man dater"?

Oh, goody!

That makes all the difference...!

(in reply to wandersalone)
Profile   Post #: 110
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 1:32:49 PM   
Rule


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rule
The concept 'race' has no meaning a modern biology. It has been established that the genetic variations within populations are larger than those between populations.

As for me: I favor 'cute'.

You're right.

I am always right.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan
And your point is?

This whole thread is a non-issue. Do not arrange marriages. Let no one sever the bond between two people that fell in love due to intervention by the Divine.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan
It certainly has meaning in modern psychology and sociology.

Backward sciences they are, then.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan
It exists in the minds of men and women--therefore it exists.

So un-exist it. Let everyone mind his own business and it won't be an issue.

This thread in itself is improper in my opinion.


(in reply to Blaakmaan)
Profile   Post #: 111
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 2:01:31 PM   
Lucienne


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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

quote:

The Afro-centric side of me prefers to see Blacks with other Blacks, and thinks that increases in interracial dating tend to benefit white men more than anyone else


Maybe it's just the circles I run in, but the majority of interracial couples I know are white women/black men.



I can't believe Spike Lee's commentary on this subject isn't on youtube.

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 112
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 2:22:47 PM   
Blaakmaan


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First, if you disagree with me, you CAN'T always be right.

Second, because you disagree with a science doesn't make it "backwards" (sorry to break it to you...).

Third, there is not such thing as an "improper thread."

Fourth, if you want the thread to "die," why are you posting on it???

To quote Mr. Spock: "Illogical."

(in reply to Rule)
Profile   Post #: 113
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 2:23:14 PM   
Fnordstrum


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan


quote:

ORIGINAL: Fnordstrum

I would say that if you don't date a specific race, if it's simply because you just don't find people of that race attractive, then it's not racism. (Some people are just really picky when it comes to what they find attractive, etc)

However any other reason, I would say falls under racism... Or at least I can't think of anything that wouldn't be.

Fnord.

¤¤¤¤¤¤¤



That begs the question, which is why one would consistently find or feel or believe that one particular race--or every race but one's own--is not attractive, but another race is.

That could, and often is, what's rooted in either feelings of racism or racial superiority.

What about persons who only date outside of their own race?

They don't find their own race attractive?

They're so picky about whom they date that none of their own race qualify?

What would you call that???

Finally, if I am considering whom to date, am I really asking myself if I consider that race attractive, or whether I consider that person attractive?

I would hope I would be asking myself whether I find that particular person attractive, not their entire race.



Again, it could be because they have various prejudices against either their own or other races, or, they could just not be attracted to them... If someone's favorite color is green, there isn't necessarily some kind of reason for liking that more than some other color... I would say not dating people of a certain race simply because you don't find them attractive isn't "They're [whever race], so they look ugly," but, "I just don't find this person attractive" (Which happens to happen with everyone they encounter of that race)


For me, personally, I find ultra-pale skin more attractive than any other skin color, however, that's not something that would prevent me from dating anyone.

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RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 2:24:57 PM   
Rule


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan
First, if you disagree with me, you CAN'T always be right.

lol

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan
To quote Mr. Spock: "Illogical."

Quite. I am perfectly illogical.

(in reply to Blaakmaan)
Profile   Post #: 115
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 2:26:05 PM   
Blaakmaan


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Actually, since Jews are a religion or an ethnicity, and whites are a race, and Jews can be considered white, that was possibly not the best example.

But, did you miss the part that said "In my (not-so-humble) opinion..."???

There ya' go!

(in reply to sirsholly)
Profile   Post #: 116
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 2:27:26 PM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucienne

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

quote:

The Afro-centric side of me prefers to see Blacks with other Blacks, and thinks that increases in interracial dating tend to benefit white men more than anyone else


Maybe it's just the circles I run in, but the majority of interracial couples I know are white women/black men.



I can't believe Spike Lee's commentary on this subject isn't on youtube.



Spike's made a lot of comments on a lot of subjects.

Can you give us/me the gist of the comment you are referring to?

(in reply to Lucienne)
Profile   Post #: 117
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 2:28:34 PM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rule

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan
First, if you disagree with me, you CAN'T always be right.

lol

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan
To quote Mr. Spock: "Illogical."

Quite. I am perfectly illogical.



Well, NOW you're right!!!! :-)

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Profile   Post #: 118
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 2:33:33 PM   
wandersalone


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan

"An equal opportunity white man dater"?

Oh, goody!

That makes all the difference...!


Oh for goodness sakes, that was an attempt at humour. 

My point was that I don't date Indian or Fijian-Indian men because I don't actually know any through my work or social groups, not because I consciously do not want to date them. 


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(in reply to Blaakmaan)
Profile   Post #: 119
RE: The impact of racial preferences in dating... - 11/2/2009 2:39:09 PM   
Blaakmaan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: wandersalone

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan

"An equal opportunity white man dater"?

Oh, goody!

That makes all the difference...!


Oh for goodness sakes, that was an attempt at humour. 

My point was that I don't date Indian or Fijian-Indian men because I don't actually know any through my work or social groups, not because I consciously do not want to date them. 



Well, I don't know what it would be like to not know any black people through my work or social groups.

And, I'd still have my family to hook up through.

Next time, smiley face: :-)

(in reply to wandersalone)
Profile   Post #: 120
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