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RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 8:48:05 AM   
GreedyTop


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quote:

ORIGINAL: rockspider

Why should we ban them. Moneyseekers seems par for the course here


bitter, much?


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RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 8:51:05 AM   
lobodomslavery


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Again you miss the point so gloriously Miss. You see im not tributing because i dont choose to tribute, i m not the vulnerable one here, i was, wore the t shirt , a few times and have now moved out of that, but not anymore, but there are men and women out there who are and the Femdom in question thinks that the Pro Dommes are targetting these men, first to break them down and then to take money off them by mind manipulation, ive seen it, im sure it goes on, its the vulnerable who cant say know or who feel they need to submit financially to feel good, that s who i am and the Femdom in question is concerned about
Kevin

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Profile   Post #: 182
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 8:54:10 AM   
GreedyTop


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no, you're just a clueless eejit.

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RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 8:55:20 AM   
AquaticSub


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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Again you miss the point so gloriously Miss. You see im not tributing because i dont choose to tribute, i m not the vulnerable one here, i was, wore the t shirt , a few times and have now moved out of that, but not anymore,


Awww.... they're vunerable. They aren't grown men, they're little vunerable babies that need to be protected. You know, I can charge some very reasonable rates for protection services. I can see my slogan now "For a small fee, I will tell you how to disable your internet and sit in the corner so the mean women will never tempt you again!"
quote:


but there are men and women out there who are and the Femdom in question thinks that the Pro Dommes are targetting these men, first to break them down and then to take money off them by mind manipulation, ive seen it, im sure it goes on, its the vulnerable who cant say know or who feel they need to submit financially to feel good, that s who i am and the Femdom in question is concerned about
Kevin



Seriously - quit hiding behind the skirts of a woman who doesn't even talk on the thread and probably doesn't exist. Grow a pair of balls and just say it: You don't like pro doms.

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Profile   Post #: 184
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 8:55:36 AM   
BoiJen


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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Again you miss the point so gloriously Miss. You see im not tributing because i dont choose to tribute, i m not the vulnerable one here, i was, wore the t shirt , a few times and have now moved out of that, but not anymore, but there are men and women out there who are and the Femdom in question thinks that the Pro Dommes are targetting these men, first to break them down and then to take money off them by mind manipulation, ive seen it, im sure it goes on, its the vulnerable who cant say know or who feel they need to submit financially to feel good, that s who i am and the Femdom in question is concerned about
Kevin



First...I'ma boi. Not a "Miss".

Secondly, what about ProDommes don't target that you don't get? Customers go to THEM. They advertise legitimately, they cannot force a customer to go to them, just like any restaurant, grocery, other product or service provider. And, if this "Domme" really cares about making a point, maybe she should crawl out from the rock her lazy ass is hiding under and speak for her damn self. Or are you scared that if you start posting under two profiles, that you'll forget to log out of the right one?

boi


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RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 9:06:34 AM   
openmindedslave


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The other day I had the conversation with someone who was thinking of becoming a prodom , not to make her self rich, but to simply pay some bills .We talked about the pros and cons of doing business with strangers .We discussed the investment of equipment and knowledge that one who is serious about going pro will need for the host of interest they will be asked to particpate  in.  And finally I took a look at the picture grid in my area  for female doms .Of the 16  womans pcitures that came up , 8 were seeking tribute in theor profiles. That tells me there is a market for their services.in our state and probably yours . That the professionals out here.. serve the purpose for those who need a quick fix and do not seek a realtionship. There is more ...but I would be more interested in seeking fakes  removed here .At least you know from the very begining that someone is a professional and why their here.  They may be one of the most honest group of people out here .

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Profile   Post #: 186
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 9:24:14 AM   
vincentML


Posts: 9980
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Again you miss the point so gloriously Miss. You see im not tributing because i dont choose to tribute, i m not the vulnerable one here, i was, wore the t shirt , a few times and have now moved out of that, but not anymore, but there are men and women out there who are and the Femdom in question thinks that the Pro Dommes are targetting these men, first to break them down and then to take money off them by mind manipulation, ive seen it, im sure it goes on, its the vulnerable who cant say know or who feel they need to submit financially to feel good, that s who i am and the Femdom in question is concerned about
Kevin



aaarrrgggghh !!! It's a dog eat dog world out there and a damn good thing we have you and Carrie Nation to save us from our vices.
I bet you are a cute Messiah.

If you had any idea how many hours these women work, how entrepreneurial they must be, how gutsy to be out there on their own living by their wits, never knowing what sort of idiot will walk through the door, not to mention the loads who just call to try to get some free phone sex, and the tons who make appointments and never show; and as someone else mentioned, the investment in equipment, rent, electricity, costumes, etc...... you might not be writing such a silly ass, disrespectful, annoying post as this claiming Prodommes are "targeting" vulnerable victims, and have a hell of a lot more respect for these ladies who did indeed open the way for the BDSM community. How is it you are so naive? Mind manipulation? That is freakin fall down funny. Tell that to the Lady you are consulting. Is she just trying to level the competition? Can't make it out there on her own? Well, too bad, honey. Don't quit your day job.


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RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 9:29:29 AM   
stella41b


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Fast Reply

Please forgive me if I'm kind of out of it, as I'm returning to the boards and could have put money on there being a Kevin thread and me responding to it..

I've gone over the threads seen a few OPs my eyes rolled a few times but with this one they reacted like one of those one armed bandits you find in Las Vegas.

We appear to be living in some sort of age of conformity where due to social conditioning we're conditioned to compete with each other, compete for jobs, compete for parking spaces, compete for the stuff we buy even (e-Bay as a prime example) and there's a lot of pressure from the authorities, mainstream churches, the media et al to conform to some sort of stereotype or even become some sort of clone.

I could make an analogy of the question posed in the OP. Lots of people enjoy taking pictures and photography. Should we therefore ban professional photographers from sites such as Flickr and Picasa?

I bet half of you haven't really got an opinion on that or even thought about it. But then again it's not really a big issue as it doesn't really involve money together with sex together with women, and it would appear it's either sex or money which are the biggest chips in some sort of power struggle between the genders. Especially now when it would appear we're all competing with each other.

I can't help thinking that there's so many people who are so willing to give up control of their own minds to some sort of external mind control such as politics and religion and in the case of women also the media and fashion. It would appear that so many are too busy chasing some unrealistic ideal or image of perfection either about themselves or other people to ever really properly enjoy life or find lasting happiness.

How many threads do we read on these very boards started by unhappy people who are unhappy because they are not this, they are not that, or that their partner, dom, sub, whatever isn't who they thought they would be at the start?

This appears to affect women much more then men, who are under so much social pressure to conform to media inspired stereotypes where it's debatable where the actual source of the oppression starts but where it can be seen as women slavishly oppressing other women.

You know out there in 'vanilla', out there in wider society it's already a case of judge, condemn, exclude. Take a walk around any major city nowadays and you will find it's just as easy to find someone who's homeless and sleeping on the streets as it is to find a pair of shoes. Most people don't notice, they haven't got the time as they themselves are often too busy or focussed on keeping life and soul together, getting through the working day and paying the bills.

Now it seems that BDSM is becoming more popular and more acceptable and more people are getting into it, it would appear that so too are the social prejudices and hasty moral judgments that come with them. Kink isn't just kink any more, it's now acceptable kink, popular kink, less popular kink, unacceptable kink, and the people who were excluded from mainstream society for being kinky appear to be being pushed more towards exclusion by others just because they are not into the right kinks.

Yeah right, there are dommes on this site and some of them charge and are pro-dommes. But then again it isn't that easy to find a decent job any more, not everyone is prepared to carry the social stigma of being on welfare, bills still need to be paid, money still has to be found, fees need to be paid to college and kids need to be fed and clothed.

Then again we're living in a society where we're conditioned to compete with one another and money and sex are big issues. When I was a teenager I had the freedom to protest, to rebel, not to conform, but nowadays young people just don't have that luxury and they're under so much social pressure to present the image because they can oh so easily be excluded.

And yes, then again... some pro dommes are pro dommes because they enjoy working as pro dommes and enjoy working with clients who enjoy going to pro dommes or appreciate that there are pro dommes there available for them.

So what?

I'm sorry but I'm not going to join in the judge, condemn, and exclude camp. I'm in the live and let live camp, I value my individuality and personal freedom and I respect the individuality and personal freedom of others. And besides my life is too interesting and absorbing to waste time sitting round being concerned with what other people who have no meaning or connection to me personally are doing.



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RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 10:10:37 AM   
vincentML


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quote:

ORIGINAL: stella41b

<SNIP>

I bet half of you haven't really got an opinion on that or even thought about it. But then again it's not really a big issue as it doesn't really involve money together with sex together with women, and it would appear it's either sex or money which are the biggest chips in some sort of power struggle between the genders. Especially now when it would appear we're all competing with each other.

<SNIP>

Now it seems that BDSM is becoming more popular and more acceptable and more people are getting into it, it would appear that so too are the social prejudices and hasty moral judgments that come with them. Kink isn't just kink any more, it's now acceptable kink, popular kink, less popular kink, unacceptable kink, and the people who were excluded from mainstream society for being kinky appear to be being pushed more towards exclusion by others just because they are not into the right kinks.

Yeah right, there are dommes on this site and some of them charge and are pro-dommes. But then again it isn't that easy to find a decent job any more, not everyone is prepared to carry the social stigma of being on welfare, bills still need to be paid, money still has to be found, fees need to be paid to college and kids need to be fed and clothed.

<SNIP>
And yes, then again... some pro dommes are pro dommes because they enjoy working as pro dommes and enjoy working with clients who enjoy going to pro dommes or appreciate that there are pro dommes there available for them.

So what?

I'm sorry but I'm not going to join in the judge, condemn, and exclude camp. I'm in the live and let live camp, I value my individuality and personal freedom and I respect the individuality and personal freedom of others. And besides my life is too interesting and absorbing to waste time sitting round being concerned with what other people who have no meaning or connection to me personally are doing.




Well said. Sorry I had to snip so much of it for my reply.

I just wanted to say this. Prodommes existed before the internet. They advertised in print magazines. Their clients were self-selecting. They had to get in the car, drive to the store, buy the magazine, make the call, secure the appointment. They showed up on time.

The internet came; the print magazines died. The Classic Prodomme will tell you she had a better business before the internet than she does now. The internet has not done them a favor.

Now any 20 year old without much or any experience can buy a $20 whip and put a pic up on CM. Entree to the profession is much easier...waaaaaay easier. Competition is up and the client base is much more unpredictable. Lucky if one out of three confirmed appointments actually shows up.

The OP simply does not know what he is talking about.


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vML

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. ~ MLK Jr.

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 189
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 10:11:04 AM   
lobodomslavery


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I dont agree with your view but I do welcome the rational response. Stella you are an example to everyone on this site for your calm and rational responses. I welcome your intelligent reply devoid as it is of insulting remarks and name calling as some others have demonstrated in their replies. As for Women who are struggling financially I sympathise, but again that is what social security is for , for those without jobs, i know it wont go nearly far enough, im aware of that but Dommes should be aware that subbies are struggling in the current recession also and that if he/she gives to Him/Her he will most likely go without at Her expense. The Dublin Femdom's argument in a nutshell is this , nobody goes into this lifestyle to be exploited and Women or Men should not exploit submissive individuals or try to seduce them into becoming financial slaves by saying that they will feel much better if they submit and their only purpose is to serve the Dominant Lady/Dominant Man in question,  particularly at a time of hardship for all. I dont disagree with this argument
Kevin

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RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 10:35:43 AM   
BoiJen


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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

I dont agree with your view but I do welcome the rational response. Stella you are an example to everyone on this site for your calm and rational responses. I welcome your intelligent reply devoid as it is of insulting remarks and name calling as some others have demonstrated in their replies. As for Women who are struggling financially I sympathise, but again that is what social security is for , for those without jobs, i know it wont go nearly far enough, im aware of that but Dommes should be aware that subbies are struggling in the current recession also and that if he/she gives to Him/Her he will most likely go without at Her expense. The Dublin Femdom's argument in a nutshell is this , nobody goes into this lifestyle to be exploited and Women or Men should not exploit submissive individuals or try to seduce them into becoming financial slaves by saying that they will feel much better if they submit and their only purpose is to serve the Dominant Lady/Dominant Man in question,  particularly at a time of hardship for all. I dont disagree with this argument
Kevin



So....Dommes should give up their time to serve "s-types"?...really?


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RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 10:43:55 AM   
Dnomyar


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I tried turning Pro. I had to quit because I ran out of money having to pay people refunds.

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RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 12:02:42 PM   
rockspider


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Well it does surprise me you say that. Here all sorts of sexual services is advertised in the biggest daily newspaper. Quick count today it is 4½ pages. Most refer to a webpages for more info. Before the internet that probably was no more than 2 pages. Some do have their own webpage but most really go through a portal. On entering the portal up comes a menu where you can really pick which kind of service you are looking for. You then click down through stuff like region and of course end in the actual individual service. It does give all kind of info as opening times, telephone numbers, address, services offered, prices and pictures of the girls (men actually advertise too on this). I really expected USA of having a very similar offering. Ok to direktly sell sex is actually forbidden here so it is in a "code" which i think any 14 year old knows. By the way, never ask a woman here for a danish. It is more likely to earn you a kick in the nuts as it is massageparlour slang for a straight fuck.
If i was looking for paid sex i would use one of those portals and i could be ready to get out the door in 5 minutes. So i don't really understand the presence of them here on CM. Who wants to use hours going through profiles, trying to contact and all that when i can have what i look for on the phone in 2 minutes flat. Hell if she doesn't answer, the next on the list do.
But might be our system is different from ours.
I have known a girl doing it for many years. But the fact, that why i know her is that she is the waitress on a pub i used to frequent in Copenhagen, do tell me that it is not so profitable at all.
[/quote]

Well said. Sorry I had to snip so much of it for my reply.

I just wanted to say this. Prodommes existed before the internet. They advertised in print magazines. Their clients were self-selecting. They had to get in the car, drive to the store, buy the magazine, make the call, secure the appointment. They showed up on time.

The internet came; the print magazines died. The Classic Prodomme will tell you she had a better business before the internet than she does now. The internet has not done them a favor.


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Profile   Post #: 193
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 12:29:56 PM   
sappatoti


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From: the edge of darkness...
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery
... As for Women who are struggling financially I sympathise, but again that is what social security is for , for those without jobs, i know it wont go nearly far enough, im aware of that but Dommes should be aware that subbies are struggling in the current recession also and that if he/she gives to Him/Her he will most likely go without at Her expense. ...

Kevin, you write as if it is a natural-born right of a submissive to receive domination from a Dom. It is not a right. At best, it is a privilege. Are you honestly saying that a submissive will die if he or she does not receive domination?

Simply put, if a submissive does not have the ability to pay for services, they simply do not look for the pay-for-play. The Dominant is not the one in control of the transaction. The submissive is. End of story.

If a submissive cannot control themselves from looking at pay services when they cannot afford them, they have a real addiction and problem. They need to be counseled. This is no different than one who is addicted to drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, gambling, etc.

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery
The Dublin Femdom's argument in a nutshell is this , nobody goes into this lifestyle to be exploited and Women or Men should not exploit submissive individuals or try to seduce them into becoming financial slaves by saying that they will feel much better if they submit and their only purpose is to serve the Dominant Lady/Dominant Man in question,  particularly at a time of hardship for all. ...

Some will say that exploitation is a mutually negotiated and arrived at kink. If both parties agree to the exploitation, however it may be played, then it really not need to be a concern for anyone else.

The point that has been made many times in this thread, let alone elsewhere, and yet you keep ignoring is... there is no exploitation if a sub doesn't first send the money to the Dominant. Period. The Dominant cannot physically torture a sub into doing so through the internet, a mail message, a message sent by post, a printed advertisement, a radio or TV ad, or a telephone call. The technology to do so does not exist. There will be no whip, paddle, cuffs, or even gun that will magically pop out of the communication medium pointed at a submissive, threatening them with injury if they don't pay up.

Again, the submissive is the one in control here. Just because an ad is created with images and words that call for exploitation does not automatically mean that every submissive, weak-minded or not, will come under its charms and send in payments. That's ludicrous to think that it does. In my opinion, any submissive who automatically falls for this kind of nonsense is the one to be blamed, as they have a definite addiction and serious mental problem. They need help and counseling. The Dominant who places the ad cannot nor should not be blamed for the actions of the submissive at this point.

This is basic common sense, everyday life stuff Kevin. The same rules of engagement that take place when deciding to drink, smoke, gamble, or whatever apply to seeking out services of a Dom. The bottom line is, if the submissive cannot afford the pay-for-play, they need to move on until they find a Dominant who will play-for-no-charge.

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Profile   Post #: 194
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 1:04:22 PM   
rockspider


Posts: 633
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Hi Stella. I congratulate you on having written the best and most emphatic posting i have seen for a long time. The world just need more of your kind. Keep it coming.

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Profile   Post #: 195
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 2:11:41 PM   
vincentML


Posts: 9980
Joined: 10/31/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

I tried turning Pro. I had to quit because I ran out of money having to pay people refunds.


Thank you for the great laugh! My belly rolls.

_____________________________

vML

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. ~ MLK Jr.

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Profile   Post #: 196
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/16/2009 2:37:35 PM   
vincentML


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Joined: 10/31/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

nobody goes into this lifestyle to be exploited and Women or Men should not exploit submissive individuals or try to seduce them into becoming financial slaves by saying that they will feel much better if they submit and their only purpose is to serve the Dominant Lady/Dominant Man in question,  particularly at a time of hardship for all. I dont disagree with this argument
Kevin



Uh oh, Kevin, seems you are changing boats in midstream here. Sorry if I was harsh on you previously, but there is a big difference between Prodommes and Findommes. You did not previously mention financial slavery. If you did, I missed it. The Prodomme offers a service to the submissive that has certain advantages not the least of which is her training and talent as well as her skill at knowing when to stop the pain. This is not usually a sexual service. Not legally anyway. It may help also if she knows CPR because a few subbies are in pretty sorrowful condition.

A Findomme on the other hand offers the illusion of a relationship based upon the tribute of money. She offers no service other than to allow the submissive to be her pay piggy or human ATM. Now, that may very well be exploitive and if that is what you have been saying I would not necessarily disagree except with the caveat that we are all big boys and should be able to take care of ourselves.

I for one have never been able to understand how a subby could permit himself to be ensnared in a Blackmail Fetish. I can understand the Fetish, i understand the enticement of the loss of control, the feeling of helplessness, etc. I also understand how good nicotine feels in the brain but i do not any longer permit myself to become addicted. So, if that is the kind of "exploitation" you are talking about please make the distinction between the two species of Professional Dominants. They are not the same imho. Bottom line, it is still up to the subby to defend himself.

Vincent


_____________________________

vML

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. ~ MLK Jr.

(in reply to lobodomslavery)
Profile   Post #: 197
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/17/2009 6:22:56 AM   
lobodomslavery


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Yes it is Findommes that are my and the Femdommes target now that I think about it. She does not specify but I think She means Findommes, I thought the two were the same mind you, dont ProDommes ask for money after all
Kevin

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Profile   Post #: 198
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/17/2009 6:50:25 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
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Kevin, one question.

Why does ANY OF THIS matter to YOU????


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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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Profile   Post #: 199
RE: Is now the time to ban pro Dommes from Collarme or ... - 11/17/2009 8:35:57 AM   
MsKittyBlack


Posts: 63
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Status: offline
damn cookies

< Message edited by MsKittyBlack -- 11/17/2009 8:36:18 AM >

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