Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: the trouble with doms


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: the trouble with doms Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 5:45:39 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

If a 25 year old says she won't respond to anyone over 30, then why would someone more than twice her age insist on writing her? She has as much right to a happy relationship as you do. And if what she needs is someone of her own age, in her own location, and who likes the same music she does then why can't you respect that?

If you want other people to respect you, you have to start by respecting them. You get friends by being one. It really is that simple.


and this applys to what i said how?

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 7:20:54 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AnimusRex


quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
Accept the fact that you will strike out 95% of the time.  I do.


You got a 5% hit rate?

Pretty good.

No, seriously- considering the small circle of BDSM oriented people, factor that females are less than 1/2, and submissive females about 1/2 of that, then figure geographical compatibility, age brackets, specific interests, and personality compatibility....

Being successful with 1 out of 20 girls is a pretty good average.


Let me explain.  Out of 100 contacts of women whose collarme profiles indicate a possible match (local or willing to relocate, submissive, etc.), I will get 5% that respond.  Not all of them respond positively.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to AnimusRex)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 7:35:26 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: AnimusRex


quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
Accept the fact that you will strike out 95% of the time.  I do.


You got a 5% hit rate?

Pretty good.

No, seriously- considering the small circle of BDSM oriented people, factor that females are less than 1/2, and submissive females about 1/2 of that, then figure geographical compatibility, age brackets, specific interests, and personality compatibility....

Being successful with 1 out of 20 girls is a pretty good average.


Let me explain.  Out of 100 contacts of women whose collarme profiles indicate a possible match (local or willing to relocate, submissive, etc.), I will get 5% that respond.  Not all of them respond positively.



you get "you pathetic wretch" messages too? lolololol


_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 7:36:48 PM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Y'know, whining isn't an attractive trait in Doms.


I was going to say that, but You beat me to it.  Actually, whining isn't an attractive trait in anyone.  Dom or vanilla, I don't like to be around whiners. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Let me explain.  Out of 100 contacts of women whose collarme profiles indicate a possible match (local or willing to relocate, submissive, etc.), I will get 5% that respond.  Not all of them respond positively.

I can't imagine You getting a negative response!


< Message edited by sweetsub1957 -- 12/26/2009 7:40:02 PM >


_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:07:02 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Y'know, whining isn't an attractive trait in Doms.


I was going to say that, but You beat me to it.  Actually, whining isn't an attractive trait in anyone.  Dom or vanilla, I don't like to be around whiners. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Let me explain.  Out of 100 contacts of women whose collarme profiles indicate a possible match (local or willing to relocate, submissive, etc.), I will get 5% that respond.  Not all of them respond positively.

I can't imagine You getting a negative response!



I'm not whineing, i was just stating my opinion on the psychological difficulties of dominants and submissive getting together and the roadblocks we put in each others way.

In my case I’m reluctant to put myself in a position with a woman where I’m not sure of the outcome.

When I’m in a relationship I’m always thinking of what may go wrong and prevent me from getting what I want and thinking of ways to prevent failure, I’m a goal oriented person. To accomplish this I like complete control or as much control as possible. When I’m not in control I’m more cautious in my approach especially in regards to women I don’t know. It’s not from a lack of confidence it’s more because of a state of uncertainty, I hate uncertainty.

I know this shatters the myth of the conquering dom storming in to overpower the helpless submissive.

All this boils down to that in a relationship I’m a more determined person, out of one i'm more cautious.

Confidence to me doesn’t mean you can over come all adversity but that you pick and choose the adversity you take on. I’m not a Don Quixoti dom.



_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to sweetsub1957)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:12:54 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: AnimusRex


quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
Accept the fact that you will strike out 95% of the time.  I do.


You got a 5% hit rate?

Pretty good.

No, seriously- considering the small circle of BDSM oriented people, factor that females are less than 1/2, and submissive females about 1/2 of that, then figure geographical compatibility, age brackets, specific interests, and personality compatibility....

Being successful with 1 out of 20 girls is a pretty good average.


Let me explain.  Out of 100 contacts of women whose collarme profiles indicate a possible match (local or willing to relocate, submissive, etc.), I will get 5% that respond.  Not all of them respond positively.



you get "you pathetic wretch" messages too? lolololol



No.  I get silence, or a "Thanks, but I'm not interested" types of response.  I've had a few rude responses but not many.






_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to osf)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:17:33 PM   
hopelessfool


Posts: 988
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
Osf,

try having an actual profile...

I require nothing of anyone contacting me but i sure as hell have a hard limit of stupidity....


_____________________________

" I have nothing left to give, I have found the perfect end, You remain to make it hurt, disappear in to the dirt, carry me to heavens arms.....Dear Agony Just let go of me, suffer slowly, is this the way its gotta be, Dear Agony...."

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:23:18 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: hopelessfool

Osf,

try having an actual profile...

I require nothing of anyone contacting me but i sure as hell have a hard limit of stupidity....



meaning?

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to hopelessfool)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:30:02 PM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

In my case I’m reluctant to put myself in a position with a woman where I’m not sure of the outcome.

I can understand that.  I used to be that way all the time, but it got me nowhere fast.  To get what You want, You have to take a chance sometimes.  It can be kind of an ego-bruising, but the worst that can happen is she'll say "No."  I've heard that a number of times too.....

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to osf)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:37:49 PM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

I'm not whineing, i was just stating my opinion on the psychological difficulties of dominants and submissive getting together and the roadblocks we put in each others way.

In my case I’m reluctant to put myself in a position with a woman where I’m not sure of the outcome.

When I’m in a relationship I’m always thinking of what may go wrong and prevent me from getting what I want and thinking of ways to prevent failure, I’m a goal oriented person. To accomplish this I like complete control or as much control as possible. When I’m not in control I’m more cautious in my approach especially in regards to women I don’t know. It’s not from a lack of confidence it’s more because of a state of uncertainty, I hate uncertainty.

I know this shatters the myth of the conquering dom storming in to overpower the helpless submissive.

All this boils down to that in a relationship I’m a more determined person, out of one i'm more cautious.

Confidence to me doesn’t mean you can over come all adversity but that you pick and choose the adversity you take on. I’m not a Don Quixoti dom.




The odds are not in the Dom's favor, that's just the way it is. Either you keep trying or you don't but you can't change the odds. If as you say you are reluctant to put yourself in a position with a woman where you are not sure of the outcome then you will be destined to be alone with the odds the way they are.
There's no way around the fact that you have to put up with the uncertainty that comes with looking for a partner. It seems rather simple...you just have to suck it up and do what you don't like doing in order to get what you want, or don't do it and never find what you're looking for.

(in reply to osf)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:45:04 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

In my case I’m reluctant to put myself in a position with a woman where I’m not sure of the outcome.

I can understand that.  I used to be that way all the time, but it got me nowhere fast.  To get what You want, You have to take a chance sometimes.  It can be kind of an ego-bruising, but the worst that can happen is she'll say "No."  I've heard that a number of times too.....


reluctant not refusing

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to sweetsub1957)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:46:18 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline
quote:

The odds are not in the Dom's favor, that's just the way it is. Either you keep trying or you don't but you can't change the odds. If as you say you are reluctant to put yourself in a position with a woman where you are not sure of the outcome then you will be destined to be alone with the odds the way they are.
There's no way around the fact that you have to put up with the uncertainty that comes with looking for a partner. It seems rather simple...you just have to suck it up and do what you don't like doing in order to get what you want, or don't do it and never find what you're looking for.


in all the years i've, shall we say been associated with this, i have seen very few relationships succeed as ratio of successes to failures including mine.

the odds are not with either side, which is why i'm being more careful now

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to lizi)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:49:15 PM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

reluctant not refusing

I apologize.  I misunderstood.

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to osf)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:49:51 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

reluctant not refusing

I apologize.  I misunderstood.


misunderstanding is easy online

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to sweetsub1957)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:51:32 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline
maybe i'm getting weary of all the fantasies that don't work and aiming for a reality solution
there's a whole lot of lack of reality here

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to osf)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 8:58:40 PM   
hopelessfool


Posts: 988
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
..you filled it in since i last perved you ^_^.. good job ^_^

anywho, It sucks on eitherside, just be patient and something will come and bite you on the ass in no time...

since ive taken to the, Im just here for friends and what happens happens stance, ive met some really cool people,

and people tend to be much more open to a sincere "hello, how are you today" email then a I perused your profile (no you really didnt) and i was wondering if *blah* (which is mentioned in the profile..)

anywho  just relax and send all those doms in search of a sub to pamper to my place ^_^


_____________________________

" I have nothing left to give, I have found the perfect end, You remain to make it hurt, disappear in to the dirt, carry me to heavens arms.....Dear Agony Just let go of me, suffer slowly, is this the way its gotta be, Dear Agony...."

(in reply to osf)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 9:03:47 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline
quote:

and people tend to be much more open to a sincere "hello, how are you today" email then a I perused your profile (no you really didnt) and i was wondering if *blah* (which is mentioned in the profile..)


??????

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to hopelessfool)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 9:06:15 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline
quote:

.you filled it in since i last perved you ^_^.. good job ^_^


good bad or indeferent it's how i feel

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to hopelessfool)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/26/2009 9:22:19 PM   
QuirkyAnne


Posts: 268
Joined: 9/17/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AnimusRex


quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
Accept the fact that you will strike out 95% of the time.  I do.


You got a 5% hit rate?

Pretty good.

No, seriously- considering the small circle of BDSM oriented people, factor that females are less than 1/2, and submissive females about 1/2 of that, then figure geographical compatibility, age brackets, specific interests, and personality compatibility....


Being successful with 1 out of 20 girls is a pretty good average.


That was very enlightening, and at the same time...  So depressing. 

Anne

(in reply to AnimusRex)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: the trouble with doms - 12/27/2009 2:46:55 AM   
SomethingCatchy


Posts: 796
Joined: 7/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: osf


quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

OP, I'm not sure what you mean about subs' requirements for contacting them. Sometimes the state that I must use a code word when I contact them - I have no problem with that.  Sometimes they state that I must have a pic - well, my profile has that already.

If such a request is simply stated, I'll comply.  If they say something like "I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF DOMS THAT WON'T DO WHAT I FUCKING SAY!!!!', then I don;t contact them.  But that's for attitude, not for any requirements.

So what kinds of requirements do you allude to?



the ones that say i have to be witty, intelligent and charming come to mind, i'm miserable at all three

as for me,i just want the hear what they have to say, but then i'm so desperate to have women contact me i'll accept anything



1) A woman feels confident enough in what she wants out of a man to post it up as a requirement (who the fuck wants to talk to boring people anyway?) and you complain about it...

2) You say you're desperate, but yet you're either too stupid or too stubborn to realize that that is most likely the entire problem right there.

3) You've been trolling and there really is no point to this thread except to humiliate yourself.

4) Perhaps you've gotten confused and equate dominance with insecurity. I have no idea how the hell that works out into a responsible, reasonable adult man that a woman would like to know, but if that's your reality, you are more than welcome to it.

ETA:

You're 65 and based on your posts I've been thinking you're 19, 20 based on the maturity level you've shown in everything you've written.

It's way past time to grow up, guy.


< Message edited by SomethingCatchy -- 12/27/2009 2:57:08 AM >


_____________________________

I believe in Invisible Pink Unicorns

Everyone is gay for Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

(in reply to osf)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: the trouble with doms Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.172