quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
I will leave the interpretation of your future posts to more learned and interested folk.

quote:

ORIGINAL: happylittlepet

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
I will leave the interpretation of your future posts to more learned and interested folk.

I am so curious to find out who those folks will be [:D]

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

this thread is about the over romanticizing of d/s relationships and the negative impact it has

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

i want to dispel the myth of saint dom and strong independent submissive

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

if he's a saint and she is independent what need she they of each other

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf


what is the real meaning of a sexual dominant and submissive and what do they have to contribute to the relationship, notice i didn't say to each other as it is my belief that both serve the relationship and through that render what the other wants

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

this is about hard core d/s

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

this thread is open to comment

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

i don't have all the answers, just the answers that work for me

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

strong independent sub is the I can have it all, all I want out of life mentality

and what is wrong with wanting as much as you can possibly find just because a person is strong, independent and submissive does not mean that they are any less entitled to finding their ideal.

i am strong emotionally because ive learnt to be. i am independent because i am a single mother and ive learnt to be

there is going to be a price, you are not going to be able to have it all, you will have to make sacrifices and compromises

of course, isnt that what all relationships end up doing, making sacrifices and compromises.

I can’t tell you what they will be for they will be different in each case, but belive me they will be there


as variable as in any other relationship.

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

strong independent sub is the I can have it all, all I want out of life mentality

and what is wrong with wanting as much as you can possibly find just because a person is strong, independent and submissive does not mean that they are any less entitled to finding their ideal.

i am strong emotionally because ive learnt to be. i am independent because i am a single mother and ive learnt to be

there is going to be a price, you are not going to be able to have it all, you will have to make sacrifices and compromises

of course, isnt that what all relationships end up doing, making sacrifices and compromises.

I can’t tell you what they will be for they will be different in each case, but belive me they will be there


as variable as in any other relationship.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957

~FR~
Neither the quote function on here or my copy & paste is working for me right now, so I'm using fast reply.  So, all these references I make are from pg 3 of the thread........

Quote: Why does a saintly nature have to be separate from a Dominating nature?
OPs A:  It doesn't.  But good luck finding one.
My A to OP:  Then I must be extremely lucky.  My last Sir immediately comes to mind.  If I ever find myself belonging to Someone again like Him, once again I will count myself extremely lucky.  Our relationship was about loving, caring about, and pleasing each other.

this statement seems in agreement with mine


OPs statement:  my advice to newly emerging submissives is don't worry about most of that.....  (in reference to my earlier post on pg 3 about how I get to know a Person)
My A to OP:  Surely you aren't saying that a newly emerging submissive should wrecklessly just rush into "intimate contact" with Someone, knowing hardly anything about them???  Or are you recommending that they expose themselves to things like possibly being raped, beaten, abused, and/or killed by a relative stranger?

just not set their standards as high as they normally would

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

strong independent sub is the I can have it all, all I want out of life mentality

and what is wrong with wanting as much as you can possibly find just because a person is strong, independent and submissive does not mean that they are any less entitled to finding their ideal.

i am strong emotionally because ive learnt to be. i am independent because i am a single mother and ive learnt to be

there is going to be a price, you are not going to be able to have it all, you will have to make sacrifices and compromises

of course, isnt that what all relationships end up doing, making sacrifices and compromises.

I can’t tell you what they will be for they will be different in each case, but belive me they will be there


as variable as in any other relationship.

the sacrifices for d/s may have to be greater because of it's socially unacceptable nature

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

strong independent sub is the I can have it all, all I want out of life mentality

and what is wrong with wanting as much as you can possibly find just because a person is strong, independent and submissive does not mean that they are any less entitled to finding their ideal.

i am strong emotionally because ive learnt to be. i am independent because i am a single mother and ive learnt to be

there is going to be a price, you are not going to be able to have it all, you will have to make sacrifices and compromises

of course, isnt that what all relationships end up doing, making sacrifices and compromises.

I can’t tell you what they will be for they will be different in each case, but belive me they will be there


as variable as in any other relationship.

the sacrifices for d/s may have to be greater because of it's socially unacceptable nature

"Socially unacceptable" relationships determines how much of a sacrifice people make?? You cannot be serious.

OMFG. How did you get to be your age and not acquire ANY wisdom?

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

strong independent sub is the I can have it all, all I want out of life mentality

and what is wrong with wanting as much as you can possibly find just because a person is strong, independent and submissive does not mean that they are any less entitled to finding their ideal.

i am strong emotionally because ive learnt to be. i am independent because i am a single mother and ive learnt to be

there is going to be a price, you are not going to be able to have it all, you will have to make sacrifices and compromises

of course, isnt that what all relationships end up doing, making sacrifices and compromises.

I can’t tell you what they will be for they will be different in each case, but belive me they will be there


as variable as in any other relationship.

the sacrifices for d/s may have to be greater because of it's socially unacceptable nature

"Socially unacceptable" relationships determines how much of a sacrifice people make?? You cannot be serious.

OMFG. How did you get to be your age and not acquire ANY wisdom?

so your going out in public and talk about you weekend visit to a dungeon?

or if you frequent play parties and munches, you're going to run for political office?


you're totally amazing

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

strong independent sub is the I can have it all, all I want out of life mentality

and what is wrong with wanting as much as you can possibly find just because a person is strong, independent and submissive does not mean that they are any less entitled to finding their ideal.

i am strong emotionally because ive learnt to be. i am independent because i am a single mother and ive learnt to be

there is going to be a price, you are not going to be able to have it all, you will have to make sacrifices and compromises

of course, isnt that what all relationships end up doing, making sacrifices and compromises.

I can’t tell you what they will be for they will be different in each case, but belive me they will be there


as variable as in any other relationship.

the sacrifices for d/s may have to be greater because of it's socially unacceptable nature

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

strong independent sub is the I can have it all, all I want out of life mentality

and what is wrong with wanting as much as you can possibly find just because a person is strong, independent and submissive does not mean that they are any less entitled to finding their ideal.

i am strong emotionally because ive learnt to be. i am independent because i am a single mother and ive learnt to be

there is going to be a price, you are not going to be able to have it all, you will have to make sacrifices and compromises

of course, isnt that what all relationships end up doing, making sacrifices and compromises.

I can’t tell you what they will be for they will be different in each case, but belive me they will be there


as variable as in any other relationship.

the sacrifices for d/s may have to be greater because of it's socially unacceptable nature

my private life is just that, i dont seek social acceptance from anyone, why would i.

but then i dont tend to feel comfortable being overt in public. its possible for the dynamic between two people to continue right under everyones noses without a single person being aware of it.

shopping for food, i kept buzzing off to get stuff. in the end he got fed up with turning around and finding me gone so he just looked at me with a small frown and said quietly 'stop dissappearing'. so i did, happily, with a big grin all over my face [:)] happy as a lark fully submissive and noone knew.

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

let's agree that we disagree and ignore each other

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

let's agree that we disagree and ignore each other

You can ignore me and anyone else you refuse to debate intelligently. I, however, will do what I want, when I want to and that may or may not include responding to your posts, idiotic as they are. 'K?

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

I am not vicious at all; I just find it difficult to read some of the nonsense being spouted. You were the one who said I was dishonest which is a total misperception on your part. I post very honestly and always have.

I would advise you to look upon your own posts; many of them have been highly insulting, which could be construed as vicious to others.

If you want to dish it out, osf, you need to be able to take it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957
know about:
1. The Man as a Person.
2. His relationship status. (I don't want to find out later, after
  we're involved, that He's got a vanilla wife somewhere.
  I won't be Someone's "dirty little secret.")
3. His vanilla and kink likes/dislikes and needs/wants.  (There's
 more to the kind of relationship I want than just kink and sex.) 
4. What He wants/needs out of the relationship.
5. What He is expecting from me.
and at the same time I will let Him know all of the above about myself.  Also:
6. I need to spend some time with Him in person to see if there
  is any chemistry in real time.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957

OP, look at my list again. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957
know about:
1. The Man as a Person.
2. His relationship status. (I don't want to find out later, after
  we're involved, that He's got a vanilla wife somewhere.
  I won't be Someone's "dirty little secret.")
3. His vanilla and kink likes/dislikes and needs/wants.  (There's
 more to the kind of relationship I want than just kink and sex.) 
4. What He wants/needs out of the relationship.
5. What He is expecting from me.
and at the same time I will let Him know all of the above about myself.  Also:
6. I need to spend some time with Him in person to see if there
  is any chemistry in real time.

Tell me, what standards are set too high?  The advice in my list is common sense safety advice in the first place, as well as things a person needs to know if she/he wants what they consider a successful relationship, unless s/he wants tostart out with a lot of unhappy b.s. and unmet expectations in the beginning.  And you say to  just not set their standards as high as they normally would.  WTF!?