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manners - 1/5/2010 2:32:58 PM

louissir

Posts: 17
Joined: 12/4/2004
Status: offline

What is it about a lack of general manners? One would think that bdsm being an adult game, one would get a basic level of manners. Whenever I send a hello to a "sub" quite a few times there is a few messages back and forth. Then half the time there is a break of all communication with no.."thanks but no thanks". I know that women in here will get more messages than they can handle, however a 10 second reply will go very far. This is not a whine as I wouldnt be with a woman who cant communicate anyway. My message to all of you in here is..be an adult..polite, respectful, and if there is an exchange of information..and then you are not interested?Just say so..end of story.
Happy New Year
Louis

< Message edited by louissir -- 1/5/2010 2:34:55 PM >

Post #: 1

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 2:35:04 PM

osf

Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: louissir

What is it about a lack of general manners? One would think that bdsm being an adult game, one would get a basic level of manners. Whenever I send a hello to a "sub" quite a few times there is a few messages back and forth. Then half the time there is a break of all communication with no.."thanks but no thanks". I know that women in here will get more messages than they can handle, however a 10 second reply will go very far. This is not a whine as I wouldnt be with a woman who cant communicate anyway. My message to all of you in here is..be an adult..polite, respectful, and if there is an exchange of information..and then you are not interested?Just say so..end of story.
Happy New Year
Louis

what makes you think this group is any different than any other group ?

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

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(in reply to louissir)

Post #: 2

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 2:35:34 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

manners? ain't got 'em and ain't gonna get 'em.

woulda done; shoulda done, we all cried........

Warren Zevon

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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to louissir)

Post #: 3

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 2:38:59 PM

Jeffff

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline

Hey Ron(ne)?... what's this little fork for?

EmilyPostDom

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Post #: 4

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 2:40:26 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

if it was up your ass I bet you'd know.

Lelita Baldridge

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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to Jeffff)

Post #: 5

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 2:41:42 PM

Jeffff

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline

If it was up my ass, I'd want a new fork!

Another Disatisfied Customer

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Post #: 6

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 2:46:38 PM

sweetsub1957

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

You would think that people could use at least a basic level of manners. But the truth is, a lot of people don't. All we can do is block and delete, block and delete, and block and delete. Like my last sig line says..........don't complain when assholes advertise, it helps in avoiding them.

I do answer every letter that comes into my cmail unless the person is totally an on-your-knees-bitch type or an asshole....if the person fits one of those two descriptions, they don't get an answer AND get blocked and deleted.

Sometimes, too, if You send more than just "Hi" or "Hello. How are you?" You're more likely to get an answer. Good luck in meeting some people with better manners than You've unfortunately come across so far.

And, since no one's said this yet.....Welcome to the Boards!!

< Message edited by sweetsub1957 -- 1/5/2010 2:47:18 PM >

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Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to louissir)

Post #: 7

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 2:47:02 PM

windchymes

Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline

I knew there was a reason I ate at McDonald's....

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Post #: 8

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 2:47:29 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

I should just put this somewhere so I can copy and paste it...

This is in the Internet. The manners are a little different here if only because we have no idea what is going on behind the keyboard at the other end. If she has something going on in her real life, collarme is probably going to be pretty far from her mind. You don't know what is going on in her real life. I've done this more times than I can count because there were things going on in the real world that I needed to take care and I just forgot about CM. Later, I'll either send a message going "Sorry, there was drama" or maybe I'll just let it go.

Really, until we are at the point of exchanging other contact info, I don't take communication on collarme seriously.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 1/5/2010 2:48:33 PM >

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to louissir)

Post #: 9

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 2:56:33 PM

DarlingSavage

Posts: 2808
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline

quote:

And, since no one's said this yet.....Welcome to the Boards!!

No one's said welcome to me, I want a welcome, where's my welcome? Y'all are SO rude! I'm taking my toys and I'm going home!

(in reply to sweetsub1957)

Post #: 10

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 3:13:50 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
How much unsolicited mail do you get at home? Do you receive advertisements from cell phone companies when you are already quite satisfied with your phone service? Do you get letters about home owners insurance when you rent an apartment? How about things from your local Republican candidate for the Senate when you are clearly a Democrat?

Guess what? That unsolicited mail that you receive at home is just like folks who haven't bothered to read a profile, and contact people who are obviously a bad match. Personally, I have a few key things in My profile that make it very obvious for certain people to know that we are not compatible. They mail Me anyway. Now, please remember that the information is already available to them. Why would it be necessary for Me to write it again in an email? By the way, My general solution for this is to copy/paste those portions of My profile and say that they should read the profiles of the people they contact.

Back to the point. Do you respond to all of the unsolicited mail you get at home for offers that you aren't interested in? I'm willing to bet you haven't written back to any of the folks who have sent various forms of junk mail, newspaper circulars, credit card offers, or anything else that didn't interest you.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to DarlingSavage)

Post #: 11

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 3:16:32 PM

SlaveSimone

Posts: 95
Joined: 3/17/2008
From: Denver, Co
Status: offline

What kind of messages are you sending that aren't getting responses? Form letters, one liners, get-on-your-knees-bitch, and messages that make it blatantly clear the sender hasn't read my profile are deleted upon reading. Most of the time that I reply to any form of these messages with a 'thanks but no thanks' the responses are generally less then kind, which in the end makes me even less to likely to respond to any message I may receive.

Any ways my point is, that you may need to tweak your messages to get better results. You are, after all, the common denominator here.

Good luck,
Simone

(in reply to louissir)

Post #: 12

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 3:17:32 PM

Jeffff

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline

Belch..............

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Post #: 13

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 3:24:36 PM

LadyOddsworth

Posts: 141
Joined: 1/2/2010
Status: offline

If someone takes the time to read my profile, I respond. If they obviously have not read my profile or have sent me a clip and paste mailer, I may not.

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We all have baggage, the question is; Is it carry on or do you need a U-haul for it?

(in reply to Jeffff)

Post #: 14

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 3:54:29 PM

Wolf2Bear

Posts: 3204
Joined: 9/6/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: louissir

What is it about a lack of general manners? One would think that bdsm being an adult game, one would get a basic level of manners. Whenever I send a hello to a "sub" quite a few times there is a few messages back and forth. Then half the time there is a break of all communication with no.."thanks but no thanks". I know that women in here will get more messages than they can handle, however a 10 second reply will go very far. This is not a whine as I wouldn't be with a woman who cant communicate anyway. My message to all of you in here is..be an adult..polite, respectful, and if there is an exchange of information..and then you are not interested?Just say so..end of story.
Happy New Year
Louis

Well hells bells....I'm supposed to be polite?

~Eliza looking for Prof Higgins~

_____________________________

~Resident Sadist Approved~

Take the pain
Take the pleasure
I'm the master of both
Close your eyes, not your mind
Let me into your soul
I'm gonna work it 'til your totally blown

(in reply to louissir)

Post #: 15

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 3:56:12 PM

CarrieO

Posts: 2432
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: louissir

My message to all of you in here is..be an adult..polite, respectful, and if there is an exchange of information..and then you are not interested?Just say so..end of story.

OP,
I'm curious why you felt it was necessary to come to the boards and post this. Were some of the people you dealt with regular posters here?

I find it a bit offensive that you feel the need to come here and tell other people how to act. As you say, this is an adult site and we are adults. You've been a member since '04 and this is your first post. You might have been given a slightly better reception if you had chosen to not talk down to those on the boards because you're unhappy with the way your personal correspondences on the profile side of CM are going...or not, whatever the case may be.

That being said...Welcome and enjoy your stay.

< Message edited by CarrieO -- 1/5/2010 4:03:05 PM >

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"No matter what happens in the kitchen, never apologize"~Julia Child~

(in reply to louissir)

Post #: 16

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 4:03:41 PM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: louissir

What is it about a lack of general manners?

Welcome to earth.

One would think that bdsm being an adult game, one would get a basic level of manners.

Why? Are BDSM'er from another planet call Earth But With Manners? And it is not game for everyone, for some it is their lifestyle.

Whenever I send a hello to a "sub" quite a few times there is a few messages back and forth. Then half the time there is a break of all communication with no.."thanks but no thanks".

And that is an issue how? Seems to me they decided they were not longer interested. Men and women alike have had some give and take and then one or more parties goes poof, part of the online landscape.

I know that women in here will get more messages than they can handle, however a 10 second reply will go very far.

Yes we get a ton of messages, but I, for one, answer all if the email is cool. I will even answer uncool emails, but be very bitchy back. Some women prefer not to reply at all. Go so far towards what, assuaging your ego?

This is not a whine as I wouldnt be with a woman who cant communicate anyway.

Yes, it is a whine, be honest.

My message to all of you in here is..be an adult..polite, respectful, and if there is an exchange of information..and then you are not interested?Just say so..end of story.

No one here has to get a lecture from you. As you said, we are all adults. End of story.

Happy New Year

Ditto.

Louis

< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 1/5/2010 4:05:08 PM >

(in reply to louissir)

Post #: 17

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 4:20:13 PM

lizi

Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline

I guess this is pretty much an echo of what's been said but if an email is one or two words or one line I pass it by - that just is irritating to me and emails like that have clogged my inbox in the past. If someone is rude, suggestive, or demanding...I pass it by. If I get a cock picture...I pass it by. If it's none of those things I answer with a polite short message. Even the cut and paste ones get a short polite message unless you are the guy who keeps filling my inbox with the same cut and paste novel over and over again.
You get what you give in my book.

Edited to add: Sometimes if it's rude, suggestive, or demanding I will answer with something bitchy or instructive as in 'Dude, is this the best you can do? Treat a woman like a woman and not like a man.' But I block him after, dont' really want anyone coming back after a clueless message.

< Message edited by lizi -- 1/5/2010 4:50:58 PM >

(in reply to sexyred1)

Post #: 18

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 4:31:45 PM

sweetsub1957

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarlingSavage

quote:

And, since no one's said this yet.....Welcome to the Boards!!

No one's said welcome to me, I want a welcome, where's my welcome? Y'all are SO rude! I'm taking my toys and I'm going home!

lol Okay. DarlingSavage.....

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to DarlingSavage)

Post #: 19

RE: manners - 1/5/2010 5:10:24 PM

peppermint

Posts: 5170
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline

Never expect people to follow YOUR standards of conduct. A NO ANSWER is an answer. It means "I AM NOT INTERESTED." As has been said in the forums time and time again, IF you would bother to read them rather than just use them for complaining, when you write back that you are not interested and why you often get a nasty hate filled note back telling you why you are a fake or too old or too fat or a hag.

So, if you get no answer, that means NO. It's simple. It's easily understandable. It does not use up your valuable time. Be adult and act like an adult. Do not take rejection from someone you do not know and does not know you as a personal affront.

(in reply to louissir)

Post #: 20

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