RE: "Financially Secure"

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lobodomslavery -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 7:54:18 AM)
Im happy I broke no law to my knowledge. I look out for the under privileged and give willingly to beggars. I have no qualms about what I did. My conscience is clear. I did no wrong Kevin

lobodomslavery -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 7:57:07 AM)
I have been actively seeking since June 23rd 08. Unsuccessful so far. Like millions others. Next Kevin

lobodomslavery -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 8:02:16 AM)
Iron clad guarantee that their future financial security is assured.? What rock have you just crawled out from under Honey. ? Wake up. There is No such thing as an iron clad guarantee of future financial security being assured for anyone anymore. People are going to have to be prepared to see their standards of living drop.FACT. People are losing their jobs. FACT. Companies are going bust. FACT. Start informing yourself. People who seek guarantees of financial security are living in a dream world. Which unfortunately most of the Dommes , here, with the greatest of respect, live in - a dream world, a fantasy. Kevin

Mercnbeth -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 8:35:59 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery Iron clad guarantee that their future financial security is assured.? What rock have you just crawled out from under Honey. ? Wake up. There is No such thing as an iron clad guarantee of future financial security being assured for anyone anymore. People are going to have to be prepared to see their standards of living drop.FACT. People are losing their jobs. FACT. Companies are going bust. FACT. Start informing yourself. People who seek guarantees of financial security are living in a dream world. Which unfortunately most of the Dommes , here, with the greatest of respect, live in - a dream world, a fantasy. Kevin You do live up to your name. How's the view from under the rock of the public dole? FACT - Not having any experience or reference point for personal responsibility, it's not expected that you can appreciate it. Relying on someone's else's effort to create a job for you is appropriate for your name. Working for yourself you paid exactly what you are worth, which would be your current compensation in a world without the enabling public dole. FACT - Our "standard of living" can't be affected by the lost of materializing items or score keeping. It would be different but our standards would never be compromised. What was represented in the post was "FACT". Everything about you is a "fantasy" including the image you have representing you. Love you calling me "honey" - I am sweet! "FACT"! I'll just call you based upon the "FACTS" you have disclosed and your CM representation - 'lazy fraud'. I've read a lot of profiles and I've never seen any Dominant solicit for a partner who was a lazy unemployed slob who, in order to attract a partner, put up a picture stolen from some website. You? Expecting a positive result with that image representing who you are - that's living a fantasy!

LadyEllen -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 8:50:28 AM)
its a fair enough comment that no one can give an iron clad guarantee of financial security; even those doing well can lose the lot in a few turns in this Game Of Life, because ultimately we and our fortunes are dependent on others to a great extent. The successful are those who understand this fully, and make every effort they can to disaster-proof themselves - whether this is by diversifying investments or income streams, committing to continuous personal development (skills, qualifications) or other means. The aim is to engineer a situation whereby almost whatever happens, you have somewhere to go. however Kevin m'dear. you have been out of work and seeking now for over 18 months, correct? This is unfortunate, but it can and does happen for sure. My question is, what have you done during that period to make yourself more attractive as an employee or to prepare yourself to go out on your own? And I say that with an understanding of the psychology of long term unemployment - the weight that drags you down and against which you must struggle - 'cause aint no one gonna save you but you, and the longer youre in that position, going nowhere, the harder it becomes. E

xssve -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:00:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit <<<< goes and buys ten cases of vibrators... because it will be a cold day in hell when I lower my standards to enable a lazy bum and let him be in my life just so I have a warm... lazy ass there. Fuck that! I think there is a double standard when it comes to gender, and it cut's both ways: the assumption it's a mans world, "men make more money", women have the babies, ergo, it's the mans job to take care of the woman - I'm fine with that when there are other people to be responsible for, in this case, UM's, but if there aren't then whole thing is just a social construct with no application, it's just a sense of entitlement, and it's annoying because it's usually put in just such terms. I take care of myself, and I take care of my kids, I don't need your money, but I'm not a "bum" because I can't buy you lot's of pretty things and let you max out my credit cards because you're just so gosh darn cute - maybe this other guy will do that, in which case, I hope you're every happy together. Thing is, everybody would love to "fall into it", I'd be happy with a woman that makes more money than I do, doesn't threaten me in the slightest, and the flip side of men making more money, is that it's often easier for a woman to get a job, even if it's lower paying, which is still more than no job at all. I'm in my current situation because my ex didn't do her job: all I needed was for her to stay home and take care of the kids, I can make a lot of money doing what I do, but the hours are long, there's a lot of travel, I have to go where the work is - she didn't, I couldn't, and in the end I'm stuck doing her job, which is fine, but it means I can't do what I do, and I'm essentially stuck with a sustenance living. If any woman had been willing to step up and help me out a bit, we'd be rolling in it, but at least around here, there are a lot of guys with high paying blue collar oilfield jobs, and the women are all chasing those guys 'cause they can fall into an SUV and cell phone, and work a casual part time job, i.e., they can come in at the top, instead of having to work their way up, I can't compete. Of course, the oilfield is boom/bust, and inevitably, when the economy goes south, the Thrifty Nickel is full of people trying to sell all their toys, whereas I had a fairly recession proof gig, still do, just not quite as lucrative. Point being, it's a mutual thing, you both benefit from doing whatever you do to maintain your standard of living if that's important to you - my ex is, 7 years later, still an unemployed alcoholic sponging off her friends, I'm counting nickels and budgeting while trying to get something going where I don't have to rely on unreliable people. As a personal standard, I'm much happier living within my means than trying to keep up with the Jonese's anyway, especially if it means going into panic mode everytime the republicans crash the economy.

Lockit -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:00:10 AM)
I don't see how anyone can claim that an unemployed person isn't a drag down. Some have great attitudes and get out there and keep looking, but if they get to the point where they have no money coming in... excuse me, it is going to drag anyone with them down in some way. Whether it be attitdue, mood, them taking it easy and not worried and therefore taking advantage of someone else, the cost to feed and house them... whatever... there is a drag down. It cannot be called unfair to someone in a jam in life, to expect them to get out of that jam without expecting those who are keeping life together to treat them well. Someone truely in a jam, not of their own making is a different story, but still can come with lack of employment/income issues. It is easier to support someone in a real jam... but someone who complains, blames and doesn't do what they need to do... isn't someone I would be willing to support in any way! Funny... those that protest or cry the loudest about it all... are the type that expect understanding, less accountablity and all the support. lol As if making someone feel bad for them is justification for something.

xxblushesxx -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:05:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyEllen My question is, what have you done during that period to make yourself more attractive...? Put up a picture of some other guy...

Lockit -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:05:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: xssve quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit <<<< goes and buys ten cases of vibrators... because it will be a cold day in hell when I lower my standards to enable a lazy bum and let him be in my life just so I have a warm... lazy ass there. Fuck that! I think there is a double standard when it comes to gender, and it cut's both ways: the assumption it's a mans world, "men make more money", women have the babies, ergo, it's the mans job to take care of the woman - I'm fine with that when there are other people to be responsible for, in this case, UM's, but if there aren't then whole thing is just a social construct with no application, it's just a sense of entitlement, and it's annoying because it's usually put in just such terms. I take care of myself, and I take care of my kids, I don't need your money, but I'm not a "bum" because I can't buy you lot's of pretty things and let you max out my credit cards because you're just so gosh darn cute - maybe this other guy will do that, in which case, I hope you're every happy together. Thing is, everybody would love to "fall into it", I'd be happy with a woman that makes more money than I do, doesn't threaten me in the slightest, and the flip side of men makign more money, is that it's often easier for a woman to get a job, even if it's lower paying, which is still more than no job at all. I'm in my current situation because my ex didn't do her job: all I needed was for her to stay home and take care of the kids, I can make a lot of money doing what i do, but the hours are long, there's a lot of travel, I have to go where the work is - she didn't, I couldn't, and in the end I'm stuck doing her job, which is fine, but it means I can't do what I do, and I'm essentially stuck with a sustenance living. If any woman had been willing to step up and help me out a bit, we'd be rolling in it, but at least around here, there are a lot of guys with high paying blue collar oilfield jobs, and the women are all chasing those guys 'cause they can fall into an SUV and cell phone, and work a casual part time job, i.e., they can come in at the top, instead of having to work their way up, I can't compete. Of course, the oilfield is boom/bust, and inevitably, when the economy goes south, the Thrifty Nickel is full of people trying to sell all their toys, whereas I had a fairly recession proof gig, still do, just not quite as lucrative. Point being, it's a mutual thing, you both benefit from doing whatever you do to maintain your standard of living if that's important to you - my ex is, 7 years later, still an unemployed alcoholic sponging off her friends, I'm counting nickels and budgeting while trying to get something going where I don't have to rely on unreliable people. As a personal standard, I'm much happier living within my means than trying to keep up with the Joneses anyway, especially if it means going into panic mode everytime the republicans crash the economy. Don't know why you directed that at me... I have no double standard as exhibited in many places, including this thread. I am one of those that doesn't want to be supported and I don't ask for gifts. If you want to take some short take on one thing I said and put more meaning to it without all I said in a previous post... then go for it... but you can't put me in a catagory with the one because the other proves differently. Make your stand on your own merit... not taking mine out of context. Thank you.

xxblushesxx -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:09:48 AM)
You guys can buy me stuff. I don't mind. [;)]

LadyEllen -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:15:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx You guys can buy me stuff. I don't mind. [;)] you'd have to complete me suppliers' questionnaire though; me customers expect quality knicks only E

xxblushesxx -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:24:50 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyEllen quote: ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx You guys can buy me stuff. I don't mind. [;)] you'd have to complete me suppliers' questionnaire though; me customers expect quality knicks only E You mean I have to gasp WORK for it?!! No FAIR!![>:][:(]

xssve -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:32:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit Don't know why you directed that at me... I have no double standard as exhibited in many places, including this thread. I am one of those that doesn't want to be supported and I don't ask for gifts. If you want to take some short take on one thing I said and put more meaning to it without all I said in a previous post... then go for it... but you can't put me in a catagory with the one because the other proves differently. Make your stand on your own merit... not taking mine out of context. Thank you. Possibly because in advertising myself as a dominant, I have a sense that I'm offering protection, not looking for somebody to do all the work while I fuck off - it seems that if a woman does that, she's a Domina, if a man does it, he's a bum. What the actual reality is, I dunno, online d/s has a definite fantasyland aspect to it, and I'm not trying to characterize all Dominas; I read their profiles too, and many strike me as sincere, realistic, genuine people, others appear to subscribe to the dictum "there's a sucker born every minute", and that's what keeps generating these threads. And, sooner or later the Bulls will jump in and start trashing all the China, just like they do in any "real" submissive thread. Bottom line is, I may not provide much other than the basics, but I do provide that - the rest is up to you, I'm comfortable, what you do is of no concern to me until you start trying to present your subjective standard as an objective one. If you weren't trying to do that, I apologize, I consider it a bonus if a submissive has something going, but I'm not going to discriminate if she doesn't as long as she doesn't have high expectations. And, yes, you can find hundreds of threads and profiles in here where submissive's are equating wealth with power, arguing that yes, Dom has to be able to keep them in style, or he's not a Dom, du-uh. I can't speak for Zoolander here, but I have heard it before from financially stable submissive men - they're just not "financially stable" - or gullible - enough, apparently.

Lockit -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:41:19 AM)
xssve, Your one saving grace with me is that you posted your comments around nine and looked at my profile near ten thirty... so you couldn't know what I have to say on mine. That still doesn't excuse placing me in a catagory with your opinion of most domina's. You took your own take and opinions about what most domina's are like or all about and projected onto me... who is far from the typical, ball busting, cash seeking, lazy no good wannabe's that want something for nothing and special treatment because they carry a vagina. You just batted strike outs. If you are going to use someone as an example... you best know your stand or take/opinion is correct firstly and secondly, the one you are using as an example is worthy of your comments. It seems many submissive men have an opinion of dominant women based on things other than dominant women and you have just proven that you do as well. Combine that with a bad experience with a spouse and someone not real accountable... and you have a mix for discrimination and insult to those who don't deserve it. Hopefully you will learn something from this... But don't blame me for trying to teach you a thing or two.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:50:56 AM)
With the attitudes I've seen on this thread, I have a much clearer understanding of why so many prospective subs won't even buy a coffee on a first meet, let alone dinner! How do you manage in the vanilla world, for heaven's sake?

xxblushesxx -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 9:53:36 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus With the attitudes I've seen on this thread, I have a much clearer understanding of why so many prospective subs won't even buy a coffee on a first meet, let alone dinner! How do you manage in the vanilla world, for heaven's sake? I don't have a lot of experience; I've only had two first meets with doms. But both of them brought (very nice) presents (dare I even hint at tribute? lol) to the first meet. I just thought it was a lovely gesture. And yes, lunch (or dinner) was included as well.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 10:19:25 AM)
Most subs are the same, thank goodness! It makes the ones with a chip on their shoulder stand out even more. I am serious about the ones not even paying for a coffee! Generosity of spirit shows up in lots of ways...

Lockit -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 10:29:18 AM)
To me, it is worth the cost of a cup of coffee... from star bucks even... or a dinner, to find out how someone will view things. They have a sour attitude and they won't be getting the birthday and Christmas gifts and the wonderful gifts and blessings I give throughout the year. lol Silly creatures... their selfishness just cost them big time! lol I remodeled one's boat.. his bathroom and most his house on my dime. I paid off his truck and took good care of him in many area's. He paid the utilities and house payment and I paid for everything... everything, else. He ate well, was well dressed and had the best of everything besides my gifts. Hell.. I supported two men that were stay at home... take care of Lockit guys and didn't think for a moment of resenting them because I paid the way for our comforts. Some people get wounded and sour... We all have been used or abused or taken advantage of in some way... cheated... or played... but to go forth in life with a wounded attitude of fear someone will take them even for a cup of coffee... isn't going to harvest anything good. lol

xssve -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 10:44:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit xssve, Your one saving grace with me is that you posted your comments around nine and looked at my profile near ten thirty... so you couldn't know what I have to say on mine. That still doesn't excuse placing me in a catagory with your opinion of most domina's. You took your own take and opinions about what most domina's are like or all about and projected onto me... who is far from the typical, ball busting, cash seeking, lazy no good wannabe's that want something for nothing and special treatment because they carry a vagina. You just batted strike outs. If you are going to use someone as an example... you best know your stand or take/opinion is correct firstly and secondly, the one you are using as an example is worthy of your comments. It seems many submissive men have an opinion of dominant women based on things other than dominant women and you have just proven that you do as well. Combine that with a bad experience with a spouse and someone not real accountable... and you have a mix for discrimination and insult to those who don't deserve it. Hopefully you will learn something from this... But don't blame me for trying to teach you a thing or two. Going back to your original post you were clearly talking about something you needed from a submissive other than a purely psychological need, and in fact implying that this other thing trumped you need for companionship - whatever, you're old enough to do whatever you want, but you cannot blame me for reading it the way you wrote it. I'm inclined to be generous, ideally, I also expect something besides a bedwarmer, and if that's what you meant, that's what you should have said - hopefully, you'll learn something from that. In fact, I had no particular opinion about you personally, I still don't in fact, I don't have enough information, but you cannot now pretend you weren't vehement and vituperative about it, and you didn't clarify anything beyond the word "bum". And that's what I was getting at: when it comes to objectification, men tend see women as sexual objects, women see men as financial objects, and for the most part, that seems to work out for better or worse - it just happens to stand out most glaringly when the subject of Femdom and male submissives comes up. There are plenty of guys who financially dominate women, that isn't the point either, but how many Dom profiles do you see where it's a deal breaker? Now again, I really don't care, if you can support a houseboy, that's great, if you can't se la vie. Personally, for me, I'm doing this for strictly psychological reasons: if I wanted bitches to support me I'd go into the pimp business.

Lockit -> RE: "Financially Secure" (1/19/2010 10:51:31 AM)
sxxve, This was my first post. Read it and weep... take your frigging attitude and stand.. even if there is some good in it... to someone it applies to. You are not addressing me... who I am. You are addressing something in your past. Leave me out of it darlin. Your assumptions, projections and implications as well as defending yourself mean nothing to me but that you are the walking wounded with an attitude even when that attitude is not required. quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit Egarslave, twice you have said that a domina wants you to be able to support yourself. Let's stop focusing what these domina's you have talked to or read profiles on, want, and focus on you for a moment. Can you support yourself? If no... join the unworking men who are looking to hook up around here. Some, because of the economy are having a rough time supporting themselves. That is an understandable reason for being unemployed to a point. If they were working at some point, they would most likely have unemployment, which would mean some money coming in. Those who have approached me looking for a relationship... basically a home, didn't have any income or were waiting on income or had unemployment that was about to run out. They didn't want me, they wanted the home I could provide. Honestly, I would help someone I believed was in real trouble and that I cared about. So... I don't expect someone to support me. I don't want to support them either. I do expect them to do something for themselves and many who have contacted me have felt that becasue I am ill and older, they could get in the door real easy because I must be very hungry to get someone because I can't get someone! lol (Mutter's cold day in hell!) Many of these men were not unemployed because of the economy, but poor work habits, other habits and life choices and they had hard times for years... many years. It isn't always a money thing! It is a life choice thing. Many didn't care to educate themselves. Many decided hanging with friends for a party more important or playing in life when they needed to actually pay attention. It is a mindset... an attitude... a way of life that is often indicated by the results of these things manifesting in their life and some women that really don't care about money, DO care about that! I don't want someone who makes poor life choices. I don't care how much money a man has or doesn't have, but I do care very much about that! If you can support yourself, just can't support someone else on what you make... okay... join about half the people anywhere. lol People who want a certain standard of living anyway. Not everyone is real comfortable. They may make their bills but don't have a lot of extra... nothing to fall back on. I would be in that position, not by poor choices, but because of an illness. There isn't much I can do to change that. I know many in this situation and am not alone. I doubt that any reasonable person would discredit someone else in the same position and many do team up and face a better life. If they do discredit others for what they themselves cannot do, then consider the source and move on. No sense bitching about it. This isn't about other people. This is about you. Your take on it all, your response, your life. For every woman out there that wants a rich partner, there is someone out there that doesn't care to have a rich partner or is understanding or who will be glad to take on someone in their situation or in a poorer situation. I have seen many women who actually had something going for themselves... that took on a sweet talker who had nothing, just to have someone or to fill a spot in their life. I know some men who are out there trying to take advantage of such women. The whole thing goes both ways. That is why I say in part, this is about YOU. What is your attitude? Do you make decent life choices? Do you have something to bring to a relationship or even just your life? Focus on yourself and if you need to make changes, make them and then go find someone that fits you and your life. If you focus on how things cannot happen because of other people, I would suspect that is part of your life problem that prevents you from finding someone else. Because there are poor men hooking up all over the place. lol They hook up and I literally watch them do so and in a few months they are looking again, not because they were poor, because they were accepted at first... but tossed out because of other issues... and that falls in line with their poor choices or personal issues.

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