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SylvereApLeanan -> RE: Lame posts: "No, I'm not into that. Sorry" Why bother? (1/24/2010 4:13:02 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: hardbodysub
Just imagine the OP being redirected a bit to discuss femdoms posting about something they want, and men responding that they don't like that, would never want to do that, and why. The response to the men in such cases would be overwhelmingly negative, bitter, and belittling. In such situations, the men are customarily denigrated as being "not real subs", and told to voice their opinions elsewhere.
I won't deny this is the case. However, let's put it in perspective:
What do you think would happen if a sub, male or female, posted in the submissives forum and a dominant (male or female) told that sub s/he was wrong for posting that way? Do you think the rest of the subs would stand back and do nothing? Or do you think the Dumbinant would be run out of the forum on a rail? Similarly, what do you think would happen if a dominant woman posted in the Master's forum, received replies along the lines of "nope, not into that and can't imagine ever becoming interested in it," then proceeded to pitch the sort of hissy fit many of the submissive men here throw when their own fetishes are dismissed? Do you think the dominant men would sit silently by while the dominant woman bitched and moaned or do you think they'd tell her to put on her big girl panties and cope?
It's all a matter of where you are, not who you are. Granted, anyone can post anywhere on the forums, regardless of sex, gender, or D/s orientation. However, one should expect, when posting to a forum dedicated to a particular group, for those who identify as belonging to that group to speak freely, regardless what their opinions happen to be.
For those who think there's a double standard, I suggest that they're right, there is. Men are lambasted from head to toe whenever they chime in the way women do habitually.
I disagree. I have seen men respond in exactly the same way you claim the dominant women do and, not only were they not lambasted by women, in many cases their posts were supported.
As I see it, trolls looking for wank fodder are treated the same, regardless of whether they're male or female. However, there are far more complaints about that treatment to be found on the Mistress board than in other sections of the forum. I don't think I've ever seen anyone on the Masters, Gorean, or Submissive boards suggest that they should consider softening their posting styles or simply refrain from posting so as not to offend anyone and have the suggestion be taken seriously. This is where I see the double standard come into play.
quote:
Getting back to this thread's OP, however, I don't give a damn who writes the OP. If they're asking for opinions about a particular fetish, or whether people are into it or not, and why, then everyone should feel free to chime right in. If the OP is asking specifically just to hear from people who SHARE that fetish, then someone who just can't stop themselves from raining on the parade has a bit of a problem.
This wasn't the topic of the OP. The OP was about complaints of (predominantlly) sub men when the dominant women express their distaste for a particular fetish and those same individuals then telling us, the dominant women for whom this board was created, to shut the fuck up if we don't have anything positive to say. The OP went on to express the view that those who voice a negative opinion (in the sense of saying they aren't into X, Y, or Z fetish, not negative = snarky) are actually giving the poster valuable information from which he can benefit if he takes the time to read and analyze the responses.
I happen to agree with Aakasha that there is something to be learned, even from the snark. I also agree with you that we could do things a bit differently and try to help new posters more. Hence the reason I suggested the FAQ, which will include links to threads about common topics and suggestions for how to write a post that won't get a body lambasted for appearing to be a troll.
What I don't agree with is that anyone other than the mods has the right to tell the dominant women on this board how they should post, and I posit that anyone who thinks he has that right will, and should be, verbally shredded for his unmitigated gall and overweening arrogance.
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