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Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/1/2010 9:43:32 PM

everythingzen

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This may have already been posted, but I think it is a very valuable read for submissives looking for a dominant partner: http://askdollie.com/acid_test.htm

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/1/2010 9:48:49 PM

LadyAngelika

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Is this supposed to be a substitute for using your judgement?

Ok, that might come across as snarky, but I'm genuinely serious. The true acid-test is your instincts.

Dominants aren't all the same -- in fact, some of us are women ;-) -- and have a different approach to their dominance. No self respecting dominant would try to stick to a script or pass a test.

- LA

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/1/2010 9:48:54 PM

Kana

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Claps hands. Oh Goodie. Hops up and down.
And here I was worried I would have to think for myself or something when I could follow such stellar advice as "Know what a real Dom acts like."

Wanders away muttering about sanctimonious do gooders and commonalities between good intentions and highways to hell.....

< Message edited by Kana -- 2/1/2010 9:50:31 PM >

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/1/2010 9:52:29 PM

sexyred1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: everythingzen

This may have already been posted, but I think it is a very valuable read for submissives looking for a dominant partner: http://askdollie.com/acid_test.htm

I guess you are trying to be helpful, but really, the subs around here are pretty smart cookies, so that link would be a big DUH to us.

However, there are lot of newbies not sure of themselves and perhaps new to internet speak. So, you may gave done some good in the end.

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/1/2010 10:03:19 PM

everythingzen

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I said nothing more than it would be a valuable read :) Kana...such a hater!

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/1/2010 10:05:40 PM

sexyred1

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Well, we get alot of this kind of thing when people come in with these reads and some people find it somewhat condescending, even if you did not mean it that way.

:)

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/1/2010 11:00:04 PM

juliaoceania

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Right off the bat I have some issues with this "acid test"

quote:

Various estimates and surveys have placed the ratio of real (i.e. natural) male sexual Dominants to female sexual submissives at about one to ten. However, a quick count in any given BDSM-oriented chat room would lead you to believe that male Doms outnumber the subs at about two to one. Now if there is actually only one male Dom for every ten female subs, that means that 19 out of the 20 "Doms" you see online have to be fakes. Keep this in mind. There is a 95% chance that any man you talk to online claiming to be a Dom is no such thing. This leads us to our first rule, a rule that all statisticians and scientists already know by heart: "When in doubt, throw it out!"

The implicit meaning here is that dominants that have little or no experience are "fakes" and should not label themselves this way.... Although those labeling themselves as submissive are not "fakes"... I suppose this is because it takes less to be a sub? Who knows how these folks arrive at their definition or realness or fakeness

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/1/2010 11:05:45 PM

myotherself

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

Right off the bat I have some issues with this "acid test"

quote:

Various estimates and surveys have placed the ratio of real (i.e. natural) male sexual Dominants to female sexual submissives at about one to ten. However, a quick count in any given BDSM-oriented chat room would lead you to believe that male Doms outnumber the subs at about two to one. Now if there is actually only one male Dom for every ten female subs, that means that 19 out of the 20 "Doms" you see online have to be fakes. Keep this in mind. There is a 95% chance that any man you talk to online claiming to be a Dom is no such thing. This leads us to our first rule, a rule that all statisticians and scientists already know by heart: "When in doubt, throw it out!"

The implicit meaning here is that dominants that have little or no experience are "fakes" and should not label themselves this way.... Although those labeling themselves as submissive are not "fakes"... I suppose this is because it takes less to be a sub? Who knows how these folks arrive at their definition or realness or fakeness

agreed! From personal experience, the best Doms I have ever met had very little experience, but had all the natural instincts to make them pretty phenomenal...

And splitting the hairs here a little, as a scientist AND a statistician, I would argue that the 'rule' mentioned in this 'guide' should be rewritten along the lines of 'when in doubt, you either have an anomaly or something truly interesting...so investigate further to either eliminate or validate'.

But then, I'm just a simple sub...what do I know? :-)

edited to correct abysmal formatting...

< Message edited by myotherself -- 2/1/2010 11:07:50 PM >

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/1/2010 11:48:24 PM

LadyPact

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The day I have to pass a test or prove that I am Dominant, I will graciously accept that I am not one at all.

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/1/2010 11:54:14 PM

Icarys

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I did the slave litmus test and passed with flying colors..Yellow for Dominate!

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/2/2010 12:32:15 AM

allthatjaz

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The problem here is that anyone can write something and have it published to the web.
If I were new and read a paper like that I think I would just give up before I ever got going because it sounds to me like there really is no such thing as a Dom and even if there are any Doms out there, they are so few and far between that the chances of finding one is minimal.

I agree with the others... Use common sense and your own judgment. My mum always said 'if it feels wrong then it probably is'

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/2/2010 2:18:14 AM

Elisabella

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Acid test for a true dominant.

Step 1. Take some acid.
Step 2. Look at your dominant.
Step 3. Determine whether they more closely resemble a wolf, a spider, a cat, or a puppy.

If wolf - they like to bite.
If spider - they like bondage.
If cat - they like D/s dominance
If puppy - buy another 10 strip and move on to the next man.

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/2/2010 2:21:48 AM

Icarys

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quote:

I did the slave litmus test and passed with flying colors..Yellow for Dominate!

Okay, that was a pee joke!! Tough crowd...piss on all of ya!

< Message edited by Icarys -- 2/2/2010 2:22:14 AM >

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submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/2/2010 2:38:50 AM

ResidentSadist

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I failed the true test disastrously – I am a fake

I agree with opening statements. Submissives far outnumber Dominants (except in Nigeria), the world is full of snerts and you should know your goals. Good basic advice. However, after all these years experience, I just learned I am still not a true dominant. I am crushed. I just may ctrl+alt+del my cyber self. My frail ego is bruised and I need to go away and heal.
:)

-=Test Results=-
Passed
Test #1: When in doubt, throw it out! …
--- duh

Failed
Test #2: …Real Doms don't have to ask for titles, we earn them.
---Sir means gentleman and I use “sir” to address my waiter, barber, butcher, fellow Dominants etc. If a submissive doesn’t have the manners to address me with the same respect I address others, she can -just fuck off. The world is full of polite people who don’t feel their first impression on others should be rude until they judge whether someone has earned the right to be treated politely. That is the control freak, not the people who refuse to interact with “the free range rude*”.
*quoted Hannibal Lector

Failed
Test #3: "I want you to take my collar before you play with me." …
---Although I agree with the cyber collar comments, I am not a Top, so I rarely play with other peoples property. In real life, I try not commit prosecutable acts with anyone I don’t own because it is illegal to “strike”, “choke”, “cut”, “restrain”, “sodomize” or otherwise “torture” someone with “mediaeval torture instruments” like “whips” and “canes” and etc. I don't have a box of collars I pass out to freely trying to play with strangers but, in general, she will most likely have my symbol of intimate attachment "before you see me play with her".

Passed
Test #4: … Instant Message that says something like "On your knees you [slave, slut, bitch, whore, etc.]"…
--- lol

Passed
Test #5: "I don't have to answer that question!" or "It's not proper etiquette …
---In my world there is no privacy or secrets for either the Dom or sub.

Failed
Test #6: "It's my way or the highway!" …
---I run a democratic house where life’s goals are set by the mutual needs of subordinates and the Dominant. There is a system for subordinates to have a voice. However, in the small day to day business and choosing the path to reach our mutual goals, all suggestions welcome, no arguments accepted because in the end, it's my way or the highway.

Passed
Test #7: Don't bother with online collars…
I just don’t do online stuff other than cause trouble here at CollarMe.

Passed (sorta)
Test #8: Ask your prospect if he's ever made any mistakes during a scene. If he says "no," run for your life! If he says, "very rarely," at least be suspicious.
---There is a lot of edge play mixed in with typically safer BDSM acts. I can’t make mistakes or people would end up in the hospital. My “play” has to be inspired and often it is planned out in advance. Stories about my mistakes start with “25 years ago, there was this time I …”.

Failed
Test #9: "I'm a [bank president, captain of industry, self-made millionaire...]" …
---I think self-made millionaires should stay off free dating sites and get their slaves or submissive partners by referral like everyone else does. However, if they happen to meet someone at munch or on a free forum like CollarMe, it doesn’t stop them from being wealthy and powerful does it?

Everhope came to me as a nurse working two jobs to survive and driving a car she worth less than a grand. She is no longer working as a nurse. Now she is a corporate president, has a merchant banker, web site, online store and is working less than 2 hours a day to replace the income from one nursing jobs. This is all before we have launched the marketing campaign. Oh yeah, and now she drives a Cadillac.

Failed
Test #10: "I'm 33 years old, and I've been a Master for 15 years." Gimme a break! What are the odds?
---I am 54 years old and have been active in the lifestyle for 39 years. I was an alt lifestyle spokesperson at the age of 15 and was interviewed for local Detroit TV news specials. Recently, Lucivar was manager of The Quest dungeon in Tampa at the age of 21 because of his prior lifestyle experience. I guess this test doesn't allow for the TNG crowd of any era.

Passed
Test #11: Ask for references! Especially if he claims to be "very experienced."
---I come with references, including ex’s from 39 years ago that are still in my life as good friends today. I am a great guy and I can prove it. My history speaks for itself.

Passed
Test #12: "I have three real-life collared slaves right now, but you can't talk to them."
---LMAO. . . everhope even has a cage phone. Call her anytime.

Failed
Test #13: "I don't need safewords."
---Again, I am not a Top. I do a lot of edge play with people I know intimately. If I don’t know someone’s body language well enough, I shouldn’t be playing with them. Safewords… I have never had a partner ask for one so I have never had a call to use them.

Failed
Test #14: "My slaves trust me to set their limits for them."
---In the real world, everyone retains the right to refuse. My slaves are not with me to set boundaries. They are here to experience personal growth and expand boundaries. Having a slave set boundaries is like . . . well, it just doesn’t even make sense. Boundaries and expanding them are my job.

Passed
Test #15: "I'm married, my wife can't know about us" …
---OPP (other people’s property)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To the OP. Thank you for the entertainment. That test was fun and gave me nostalgic feelings like I was back at CastleRealm or something. Awesome.

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 2/2/2010 2:47:40 AM >

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/2/2010 3:21:39 AM

KMsAngel

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rs:

quote:

Passed with flying colours!!
Test #7: ...I just don’t do online stuff other than cause trouble here at CollarMe.

winky smiley, please notice

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/2/2010 3:42:06 AM

ResidentSadist

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Hey, it’s mein teil (my part) to share my perspective. . . even if I am not a true Dom by the politically correct measures established in offical tests by all statisticians and scientists.

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/2/2010 3:44:21 AM

Level

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quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself

And splitting the hairs here a little

...not the same as splitting the hare..... hyuck hyuck....

I did an acid test once. Thought the floor was sinking.....twuely.

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/2/2010 3:53:37 AM

dreamerdreaming

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*perk*

Acid test?

Yessss!!!

How many micrograms do I get?

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/2/2010 4:03:56 AM

DesFIP

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That whole bit about real doms aren't successful in their careers is such a piece of tripe. Most of the dominants I like and respect either work for themselves or are the head of their department. They aren't best at being part of the team or being closely managed despite what the article says.

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RE: Acid Test for True Dominants - 2/2/2010 4:05:48 AM

Level

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Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

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