Handeling Rude Doms

Handeling Rude Doms (Full Version)

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curiouskitten8 -> Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 10:56:47 PM)
Rude and disrespectful emails from random "Doms" seem to be quite common on this site. They never fail to light my short fuse. So I ask, how do you keep a level head? Do you just block them? And why do these "Doms", who are supposed to understand women, treat us with such disrespect when they don't know us? Don't they realize they will never own anyone of any worth acting in such a manner. let me add......... there are lots of wonderful and respectful Doms on this site.

Smutmonger -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 10:58:11 PM)
You mean "wankers"? There is no room for brains in the small head!

WyldHrt -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:01:32 PM)
quote: So I ask, how do you keep a level head? Do you just block them? Delete and block are your friends [;)]

Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:02:01 PM)
Because they have not figured out the Top Ten Mistakes Men Make in Online Dating. This problem just ain't limited to DOMs here on CM.

juliaoceania -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:02:41 PM)
Why would you allow random strangers typing text in a dialogue box to upset you so? I rarely get rude emails. I do get a lot of clueless emails from men that did not read my profile, but rude... rarely. I suppose my perception of it all maybe different than yours because I do not allow what strangers say to impact me, so I may not even notice stuff that is making your blood pressure spike.... and damn that is a good thing for me, not so much for you.... think about it...

curiouskitten8 -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:03:22 PM)
i suppose your right....some people really know how to push your buttons though

AquaticSub -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:04:59 PM)
Don't sweat it. Lifestylers are just people. Most people are nice or at least manage to be polite. And a few people are assholes. There are a LOT of profiles on this site. The more people, the bigger number of assholes. The bigger number of assholes, the larger number of EXTREME assholes. And it's not just doms. I just got some sub (I would love to post her name but see mods, I'm being good... ) who randomly messaged me to tell me I'm a twin for Shrek and I need Jenny Craig. There isn't a "twue test" before making a profile on here and, honestly, I don't want there to be. So some people come on and are assholes. I can deal with that. Yeah it pisses me off and sometimes it does hurt my feelings but that's life. In all aspects of life, I encouter some truly amazing people, a lot of nice people, some folks I don't care for and a few complete and utter assholes. I don't want BDSM/power dynamics/the lifestyle to become a fluffy cloud where we expect it to be better than any other part of life to the point where we don't know how to deal with the assholes.

GreedyTop -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:05:28 PM)
just dont let your buttons get pushed. consider the source. block, delete, hide.

Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:05:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: curiouskitten8 i suppose your right....some people really know how to push your buttons though Oh look, a fresh new subbie tasty treat on an adult website. Yum Yum.. Slurp..

Smutmonger -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:06:13 PM)
This is your golden opportunity to become "the black hole for spam." It goes in,nothing comes back out-ever. Even more amusing is the "read mail" section-where it states thier message was "deleted unread." quote: ORIGINAL: curiouskitten8 i suppose your right....some people really know how to push your buttons though

curiouskitten8 -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:07:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Whiplashsmile4 quote: ORIGINAL: curiouskitten8 i suppose your right....some people really know how to push your buttons though Oh look, a fresh new subbie tasty treat on an adult website. Yum Yum.. Slurp.. I've been around for a while :P

wittynamehere -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:07:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: curiouskitten8 And why do these "Doms", who are supposed to understand women, treat us with such disrespect when they don't know us? What has led to your assumption that people who are dominant all "understand" females? Why only that gender? In any event, your assumption is wrong. Being dominant has zero correlation with understanding females (or males, or any other gender). Some dominants understand people, and some don't. If you're going to make baseless assumptions like "all dominant people understand everybody else", you can probably understand that perhaps some of those dominant people made the assumption about you that "all submissive people want to be spoken down to in messages". Some do, and some don't. If YOU don't, don't reply. Or, get angry, and make a thread about it, to add to the other 6000 threads on the exact same topic.

curiouskitten8 -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:11:26 PM)
I made the assumption because tops generally claim to have an understanding of people or at least those they wish to control...i didn't mean to be gender specific. And generally the people who send these messages act as if they know everything I suppose I'm wrong. I'm sorry my thread agitated you quote: ORIGINAL: wittynamehere quote: ORIGINAL: curiouskitten8 And why do these "Doms", who are supposed to understand women, treat us with such disrespect when they don't know us? What has led to your assumption that people who are dominant all "understand" females? Why only that gender? In any event, your assumption is wrong. Being dominant has zero correlation with understanding females (or males, or any other gender). Some dominants understand people, and some don't. If you're going to make baseless assumptions like "all dominant people understand everybody else", you can probably understand that perhaps some of those dominant people made the assumption about you that "all submissive people want to be spoken down to in messages". Some do, and some don't. If YOU don't, don't reply. Or, get angry, and make a thread about it, to add to the other 6000 threads on the exact same topic.

Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:11:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wittynamehere quote: ORIGINAL: curiouskitten8 And why do these "Doms", who are supposed to understand women, treat us with such disrespect when they don't know us? What has led to your assumption that people who are dominant all "understand" females? Why only that gender? In any event, your assumption is wrong. Being dominant has zero correlation with understanding females (or males, or any other gender). Some dominants understand people, and some don't. If you're going to make baseless assumptions like "all dominant people understand everybody else", you can probably understand that perhaps some of those dominant people made the assumption about you that "all submissive people want to be spoken down to in messages". Some do, and some don't. If YOU don't, don't reply. Or, get angry, and make a thread about it, to add to the other 6000 threads on the exact same topic. Based purely upon my own personal observations... I would dare express that it's Man thing in general and applies to Male Doms and submissives. A relative Generalization that somewhat holds true for the most part when it comes to offending emails. In second place are the Nigerians Scammers and Dommes looking for Tribute.

juliaoceania -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:14:42 PM)
quote: I made the assumption because tops generally claim to have an understanding of people or at least those they wish to control...i didn't mean to be gender specific. And generally the people who send these messages act as if they know everything I suppose I'm wrong. I'm sorry my thread agitated you Which tops were these? My Daddy never made any claims like that, he only demonstrated them by showing me he had an understanding. There is a difference between pontificating as to understanding something and demonstrating an understanding.

Smutmonger -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:16:58 PM)
This really just weeds out guys who are Domineering-rather than Dominant. Someone in control wants to know your inner workings-it's part of an art form. You don't get women to open up at that level by coming across as a performing circus ape. "Know it alls" are usually morons.

wittynamehere -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:21:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: curiouskitten8 I made the assumption because tops generally claim to have an understanding of people or at least those they wish to control... Perhaps they didn't intend on owning you when they messaged you random rude comments. I knew very few people who would try to upset someone they were interested in a relationship with. Or perhaps something about your profile comes across as annoying to some. reads it Ahhhh. Okay, here's my take. You may be a great person, but your profile doesn't say a damn thing about yourself. It says to me "Back off man, I know what I want, and you're probably not it. I'm 19 and I demand your respect. I'm going to get what I want." It provides no information and simply sets the reader on the defensive immediately. A good profile doesn't focus on what you DON'T want. It also should provide some info about you, and what you DO seek. Otherwise, you're just going to get comments on your photo (positive or negative), the odd spam, and some of the types of messages you're here to complain about. Maybe try to sound like the sweet, interesting, and desirable person you probably are? This thread smacks of "I'm mad, and I can't get back at the person or people who made me mad, so I'm going to start a thread about it, so other mad people can be mad with me". And it'll probably work, but it's not going to get you any closer to the relationship you're after.

curiouskitten8 -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:32:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wittynamehere quote: ORIGINAL: curiouskitten8 I made the assumption because tops generally claim to have an understanding of people or at least those they wish to control... Perhaps they didn't intend on owning you when they messaged you random rude comments. I knew very few people who would try to upset someone they were interested in a relationship with. Or perhaps something about your profile comes across as annoying to some. The particular message which pushed me to start the thread was an invitation to get to know the person, to be owned ect ect. And perhaps some may be annoyed by my profile, but its no reason to be disrespectful. Its true I am a little angry....like I said people know how to push buttons, and I have a short fuse...but i was asking for advice to fix this problem..... i'd like to hear how other people shrug it off...

Smutmonger -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:36:30 PM)
If you write a profile to invite anger-that is what you will get. I see this all of the time-women angry over the wrong sort of attention. I respect this with my silence. Perhaps a potential friend will have the same kindness with you?

wittynamehere -> RE: Handeling Rude Doms (2/22/2010 11:53:01 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: curiouskitten8 Its true I am a little angry....like I said people know how to push buttons, and I have a short fuse...but i was asking for advice to fix this problem..... i'd like to hear how other people shrug it off... When I get messages that bug me, I just delete them. That generally is enough to get me "over" whatever the problem in the message was. If I definitely don't want to hear from that person again, I also hit the "block" button. Even better! And if the message was spam, or from a scammer phishing account, I'll also report it. Triple whammy. Messaging back will just give them fuel, and you'll get a reply that'll have you angrier than the first one. If they're not for you, move along, somebody else more suitable for you is around the corner.

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