Whiplashsmile4
Posts: 2305
Joined: 12/2/2008
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I tend to have a humanistic view with my relationships. The D side of the coin is where I naturally gravitate towards. Seriously, I'm more concerned about the relationship itself verses the dynamic most of the time. I really don't have any issue with having my authority or who and what I am as a person tested. However, if somebody is testing me all the fucking time.. that ain't no fun and it's time to pack the relationship in, regardless if it's an intimate one or a friendship or otherwise. When it comes to limits, first and foremost I have limits. At times my own limits have been tested and yeah, my own limits can be subject to change or not. Basically anything that challenges me as a human being, being challenged ain't always a bad thing. Personal growth factors involved, however there can be a point when there is no personal growth to be obtained.
So much dribble is posted about submissives or slave limits, however limits very much apply to us Dominant types. Hell, every human being has limits. I have yet to come across a true no limits human being.
Please forgive me for being well... so organic in nature when it comes to D/s. I can not sit here and bang out some theory about some situation that I'm not currently faced with or have not faced and slap down a one wayism!! I will express this, I've ended a relationship because cheating happened and there was a relationship where I did not end it. I can't sit here and say! Cheat on me and your ass is fucking grass and gone. I will say, this cheat on me and it just might be the End of things. I want to access things before making any decision. Get under the hood and figure out what went wrong, reasons why? Make an accessment if something like cheating is a real threat or not! Big difference when somebody just had a one night stand, verses is actually starting up or has another relationship going on. One is actually a greater threat to the relationship between the two.
I will express this, I read a lot of tightly laid out dogmatic bullshit that people post on here that's not rooted in fucking reality. I have yet to be in a relationship D/s or not D/s where both parties did not go through tests.
One thing that should be clear in any relationship, is that each person is perfectly loosable to the other person. Regardless of one's orientation, The submissive can fuck up and it can lead to the end of things, the Dom can fuck up and it can lead to the end of things.
I see all too often people trying to pull out or play the D/s card, without simply pulling the human card. Trust me, when I seriously want things done my way, I'm a fucking force of nature to be dealt with. However, this does not mean I don't have ears, a mind and a heart. There are times when I was missing the whole picture, or well even where my logic was faulted. Ironic, one of the things I've always made known and has been a standing rule of mine to anybody! Is that somebody see's that I'm about to wiley coyote my ass off the edge of cliff. to open up their mouth and let me know. Seriously, this does not make me any less Dominant in any way.
There's a degree of "It depends" room with me, while at the same time there are things that I won't tolerate or put up with at all. The whole your ass is grass and I'm the lawn mower mode. There also is a time with some very serious matters, when I'm very quiet and I'm wanting to know as much as I can to mentally process and sort things out.
There are things, that I'm accepting about which sort of defies vanilla logic and there are things that I'm not accepting about and it's my way 100% which makes it not Vanilla either.
But seriously, I'm into the relationships as a Dominant person compared to having to have a D/s relationship to the 9th degree. I tend to deal with with submissive or Dominant women. Sort of one extreme to another. However, just not with any old girl that comes along. There has to be chemistry, a good level of communication and some form of established understanding that's workable for both parties.
I'm anything but submissive, and anybody who's treated me like I was or should be, they got the rude awakening pretty quickly. I've openly told people off that I was not their little "bitch boy" or "servent" or "slave"... lol... This just ain't limited to intimate relationships, this has gone into friendships or even band stuff. Fun part, was some of the experiences I had in the Navy. Managed to upset a few Chief Petty Officers in my day. Ironic I actually seemed to get along with Officers compared to the Enlisted ones that had been in Navy since the beginning of time. Oh, the power tripping ego's. Anyways, I was known as a CUNT (civilian under naval training) and I was very happy to admit to being a CUNT. In fact, I would admit to being one Big Cunt and that I'll be the biggest CUNT ever. (Hell, I just rolled with it). My military being evals were not so great, however my work performance and other evals were always extremely high. Anyways, in terms of the power games I was well informed and taught ahead of time. Third Generation Navy dude, and I'm very happy to have returned to my civilian life.
However, being a Petty Officer myself meant that I was in that middle tier of things. Had some very interesting things that happened. I actually had somebody threaten bust me down to size and turn me into a Bosun's mate, was very entertaining because everybody else laughed their ass off at him. The sad truth was that I understood and knew more about the actual job than he did. Took him all of 4 weeks to figure out that him trying to maintain a power trip against me was self defeating. Even more so, since I bailed his own ass out of hot water a couple of times. Sigh, what's my point here? That at times, crap should not be about fucking power trips. Sure, I enjoy power and having authority, I've just never been an asshole with it. I've always been able to get people under me to jump 10 feet high when there was a sincere need to do so. However, I was not making them jump 10 feet high just for the fun of it. This goes into my own work history and not just the military.
Ironic as this might sound but because I was not a mindless robot slave that gave into authority power trips, I actually had some very interesting work assignments duties during my naval schooling. Ended up working in the office of the base commander. Then again, I'm a pretty much a tell it like it is kind of guy and try to be somewhat logical and respectful about it. Plus, I was able to deal with people trying to throw rank weight around. Respect the uniform, Respect their rank, but that did not mean I had to personally respect them or kiss ass, and by no means stand there pissing myself over the fact somebody was a higher rank in the food chain. Long as I was playing by the rules, and as long as I was not breaking the rules, It all was good. I still remember this one Senior chief that thought he had my ass over something, I was standing there just as calm as I could be (holding back information at the time and letting him hang himself a little) and he was not seeing the emotional reaction he wanted to get out of me. LOL!! After about 10 minutes, he was saying something's wrong you're way too calm, and then he doubled checked one small detail yet important detail. It totatally tossed a monkey wrench into his power trip. He just had it out for us Bubble Heads (submarine guys) and was out intentionally trying to find guys to make examples out of.
So what's my point in sharing all this? Some people are just into D/s for the sake of D/s for the sake of the mindless power tripping to throw around weight for the sake of throwing around their own weight. I've never been the kind of Dominant to mindlessly throw around authority for the hell of it with a bad attitude or chip on the shoulder.
Some of the things people post on here, tends to all be rather dogmatic as opposed to dynamic. Dynamic has always been more interesting for me. I've always done my best to take care of anybody under me or in my care. Regardless what kind of relationship it's been.
Trying to use authority or D/s to compensate for some other lack really does not cut it. Just because somebody is Dom or in a position of authority does not mean they are a good leader or somebody being fit to be in charge of things at times. Some people have this notion that people who are Dominant are good at it. Misconception! Along with how attractive people are often thought to be more intelligent.
I've truely known some extremely Dominant people in life time that were as dumb as a box full of rocks, or even were ethically corrupt. It's been a pleasure seeing the fate of some of these people unfold and take on bad directions. Sooner or later the truth always comes out. People are their own worse enemies.
In terms of the lifestyle, I think the submisssives need to test poke and probe at what the Dominant is all about before getting involved. Even at moments during the relationship itself. Some Dominants shatter and fall to pieces when a pebble is cast against the glass house facades they have.
What good is any fucking relationship dynamic, unless it's been tried tested and true blue? It really does not make me piss myself to be tested, challenged or asked questions. My whole world does not go to hell in a hand basket. Some things though, I have very little tolerence for and yes, I have limits to what I will or won't put up with.
I really don't know what good this long winded post is gonna be to this thread. Some people are not grounded in fucking reality, including their own reality of what they are truely all about as a human being, let alone being grounded in reality with D/s or their other relationships.
It's a little hard for me to dump out specific senario's from a what if perspective. At best, I can only draw upon my own well of life experiences. I've learned the meaning of Never say Never. Things ain't always black and white, and it all depends upon how the gears of life align. At times the right gears, situation or circumstances will align and you might be faced with something that tests your own limits on some level.
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Жизнь ума ебет.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUzJI4Palq0
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RE: One strike and out - 
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