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Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 6:54:56 PM

jbcurious

Posts: 717
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I never quite know what to expect when the new messsges tab lights up...I, like everyone else here, wade through those that are looking for a wank, being "uber Dom" reasonably nice guys who live on the other side of the world but want to chat ect.

What I didn't expect is that the two messages that made me smile, that quickened my pulse... would be from a 22 year old and a 27 year old.

The words on their profiles couldn't have suited me any better, if I had written them myself...until I got to the age.

We all have to draw the line somewhere regarding difference in age.

So my question where do you draw the line.. Is that line different for play partners vs relationships?

s/s could you submit to someone considerably younger then you are?

< Message edited by jbcurious -- 4/6/2010 7:12:39 PM >

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 7:07:33 PM

littlewonder

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When I was single I only dated men no more than 5 years my junior or senior. I simply found that men other than that I just had nothing in common with. Our generations were incompatible. Men younger than that were either young enough to date my daughter which just felt like pedophilia for me personally <cringe> and older than that and I felt like I was dating my father...gross.

(in reply to jbcurious)

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 7:11:01 PM

AquaticSub

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Well... considerably younger than me would be about... 16 so no.

Beyond that, I don't really see a problem in theory. The new man in my life is younger than me and yet in many ways I feel he knows the world better than I do. For me, age is an indication. Someone X age will probably be X, Y and Z. But, depending on how much we have in common and the interest between us, it's worth finding out if there is something there.

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 7:19:49 PM

thishereboi

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They have to be reasonably close to my own age. While I have no problem hanging out with much younger people or playing casually, I would not get into a serious relationship with someone young enough to be my child.

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 7:28:05 PM

peppermint

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Whether for play partners or a relationship if they are too much younger it just doesn't feel right. It's out of my comfort zone.

I will admit that Gary is 10 years old than I. If he had written me through Collarme I'd probably have told him thanks but no thanks. We met in person at an event. I never bothered to ask his age. We got along. We played. Meeting and finding out we enjoyed being together outweighed the age difference. However, I'm not sure this relationship could have happened with someone considerably my junior. I enjoy being with younger people as friends. They have wonderful ideas and points of view that I often had never considered. Being friends is entirely different from being partners.

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 7:58:24 PM

jbcurious

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One of the best relationships I've ever had was with a man 17 years younger...I learned and experienced more with him then with any man I've dated...but even for me 22 would be pushing it.

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'Smile... it's the second best thing to do with your lips.'

I have an explosive personality...

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 8:17:50 PM

playfulotter

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Right now I agree with what Littlewonder said.. 5 years one way or the other if I was looking...but when I was first looking I tried for what I had for so long which was much older than me and it never worked out..after a while they seemed too old for me..I still have an attraction to much older but for the most part if I was seeking now I would seek closer to my own age.

< Message edited by playfulotter -- 4/6/2010 8:18:58 PM >

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 8:18:16 PM

tazzygirl

Posts: 37833
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my first Dom was 13 years younger... and taught me so much. But, yes, now i do have an age limit. He must be older than my son. So, 25, now, and higher each year.

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 8:25:36 PM

UniqueRaven

Posts: 1237
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From: Austin, TX
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i tend to go for my age (39) or older - up to 10 years older. i like for us to be able to share some generational commonalities, and honestly, i'd like as many years together as possible too. Being with someone who is 55 means that i won't get the years of 40ish - 55 with him - which i want - and as much as i am a slave, i can be greedy, hee hee!

Also, being with someone close to my father's age just plain skeeves me out. So 50 is just about my limit - and i prefer younger (40s).

As far as someone younger than me goes...only if he's very mature for his age. i have spoken with a few but have yet to actually meet any - there is a certain amount of life experience i'm looking for as well. Also, someone much younger than me, because i have a pre-teen daughter and many friends with grown-yet-still-young sons, i tend to go into "Mom mode" with, which is just....ew.

i realize that this limits me a bit - at my age the Owners that are the most interested in me are in their 50s - but i have met men in their 40s that i have much in common with. So we'll see.

Good luck to you!

< Message edited by UniqueRaven -- 4/6/2010 8:26:40 PM >

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 8:30:32 PM

domiguy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: jbcurious

One of the best relationships I've ever had was with a man 17 years younger...I learned and experienced more with him then with any man I've dated...but even for me 22 would be pushing it.

It is very cool to share in that type of an experience.

Something you wil never forget I am sure.... You learned how to skate board, the lyrics to that new Ting Tings song and you actually sold t-shirts to aid those unfortunates that were devastated by the Chilean earthquake.

Then he joined a fraternity and it was over. Cry not, for you two shall always share the memories of going to prom.

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 8:34:48 PM

sweetboundesire

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I'd say maturity is a big factor. I'm friends with this man at work who is 19, yet he doesn't act it. Is very mature for his age...just the same, even with this, i'm not sure i could be with one this young. I typically like older. The only time I've went younger is with my friend w/ benefits, who's mostly friend. He is 4 yrs younger yet age's never been an issue. The age thing is non-existent. If you judge someone strictly upon their age you may be doing them and yourself an injustice. Just the same, I tend to look upwards on the age spectrum, when i look.

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 8:37:52 PM

lusciouslips19

Posts: 9792
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Id be willing to go 10 years older or younger. But to this time, I have never met one younger than a year or 2 that I could connect with. My last was 6 months younger. I know, I'm a cradle robber!

< Message edited by lusciouslips19 -- 4/6/2010 8:38:16 PM >

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 8:38:08 PM

itsmeinLV

Posts: 207
Joined: 12/23/2009
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I've never been interested in anybody younger than I am. I draw the line at 5 years older before I start to feel that it is a bit weird. I know it sounds a bit superficial to care about age but the maturity (or immaturity) level is a big factor when it comes to choosing a partner for play or relationship. I've never had the opportunity but I doubt I can fully submit to someone younger than me.

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 8:39:07 PM

Smutmonger

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I'm an equal opportunity pervert. You just have to be evil,and emotionally mature enough to put up with me.

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 8:48:32 PM

Tantriqu

Posts: 2026
Joined: 12/29/2006
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All of my men have been in their 20's and 30's: I didn't think it would work in public, but it does, and whoa, nelly, does it work in private! All my married girlfriends aren't so much jealous as 'You go, girl!'.
Younger men have far fewer hangups, prejudices and let's face it, problems, so they have far more time and enthusiasm. Younger men are natural and comfortable with women being in charge, and are wonderfully grateful for fabulous and experimental sex [but then, every age is!]. Most recently I tried a guy who was a couple of years older who never made the grade: he got hinky when it got down to brass tacks. Would I never date another man older than I again? No. But it certainly reinforces the pattern of do-me vanilla middle-aged men.

I agree with the maturity factor. My only hard limit is over the age of consent and they have to feel comfortable being seen in public as a couple [and not live with their parents!].
Age does not equal experience or maturity: THE best sub I ever had was 24-25: amazing! I can hardly wait for my next good man!

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 8:59:35 PM

DWCskitten

Posts: 199
Joined: 3/2/2010
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~FR~
i used to have a "rule" that i would see Anyone within ten years younger or older than me. my previous Sir was 2 years younger. Then along comes Master Sir.....i'm 52 and He's 68. So much for that rule. lol Were i single/unowned, i would still not see Anyone as young as my kids.....it would just feel too weird.

~kitten~

< Message edited by DWCskitten -- 4/6/2010 9:04:04 PM >

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 9:12:21 PM

tsatske

Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
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I don't have a limit for older. I married my first dear husband as soon as we could get to the church after my 18th birthday, with our oldest daughter in the audience in attendance (on an aunt's lap) (and her next two brothers quietly in attendance, as well, though we didn't know that yet) and he (my first hubby) was 38 years my senior. He was not the oldest man I had dated, at the time, or since.

For younger, they need to be noticeably older than my own children. I have not been owned by someone younger than me, but have had serious playmates who were younger, and as long as the maturity level matched, it is fine with me. Too close to my own dear sons, though, squicks me. It's my hangup, - as far as I'm concerned, when it comes to judging other's relationships, adults is adults. There are two ages in dating - adults and minors, and they ought not to date each other.

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 9:30:47 PM

DeFlowerChick

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Joined: 3/24/2010
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Don't forget people lie about their ages online too.

That 27 year old could be 17 or 77. And don't get me started on 22

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 9:32:38 PM

daddysblondie

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i've always been a bit concerned about the age difference... and then I met a wonderful Dom (through collarme) who is 8 years my junior... and I couldn't be happier.

Sometimes you just have to give a person a chance and see how you "click". We have always clicked so well that I don't really notice the age difference. Well, until he talks about some song or movie that was out when he was in high school...

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RE: Where do you draw the line? - 4/6/2010 9:48:55 PM

Aynne88

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quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysblondie

i've always been a bit concerned about the age difference... and then I met a wonderful Dom (through collarme) who is 8 years my junior... and I couldn't be happier.

Sometimes you just have to give a person a chance and see how you "click". We have always clicked so well that I don't really notice the age difference. Well, until he talks about some song or movie that was out when he was in high school...

I have always liked substantially older men, for several reasons. I enjoy the feeling of a man that is successful, and reached a certain status in life, and to be honest at 43 I love feeling like he sees me as young and sexy. I love that he is established, a bit intimidating and very much respected in his field. It's a huge turn on for me, that older sexy authority figure. I have never been attracted to younger men, even sexually. My Man is 16 years older than me and has the means and experience to really make me feel taken care of and very protected. That is when he isn't making me cry ;)

.

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