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RE: Buddhism - 4/9/2010 9:15:07 PM

Smutmonger

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Nirvana came when he achieved the knowing that "you do not exist."

Apathy is bliss. >:))

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RE: Buddhism - 4/10/2010 9:20:47 AM

Kirata

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Smutmonger

Nirvana came when he achieved the knowing that "you do not exist."

Apathy is bliss. >:))

I get that you were joking, but the joke plays on a common misunderstanding. So I thought I'd kinda bounce off your post in order to talk about that....

Almost inevitably behind this misunderstanding lies the metaphor of a droplet merging with the ocean. So let's consider this droplet for a moment, assuming that it is self-conscious (like the human being it represents) and that its sense of self-identity is as an individual sphere of fluid.

Now, droplets aren't stupid. They know that the reason they are round is due to surface tension, that they can only survive within a limited range of temperatures, etc. And equally obvious to them is the fact that if they land in the ocean they will cease to exist.

But, if a droplet becomes aware of its true nature, if its sense of self, its sense of identity, is as water, then falling into the ocean isn't ceasing to exist -- it's more like coming home and being reunited with its greater self.

K.

< Message edited by Kirata -- 4/10/2010 9:23:20 AM >

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RE: Buddhism - 4/10/2010 10:28:52 AM

sunshinemiss

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss
My religion is simple. My religion is kindness.
His Holiness, the Dalai Lama.

I have seen and heard this definition of religion quoted often. Maybe someone more enlightened then me can answer the question that needs to be answered before accepting that ideal as a personal philosophy.

What is "kindness"?

Is it kind to give unqualified acceptance to the pragmatically incorrect position of another, or kind to enlighten them with facts?

Do not try and bend the spoon. That's impossible. Instead... only try to realize the truth - There is no spoon.

Honestly curious, is their a Dalai version of "tough kindness" equating to "tough love"?

Hey Merc,
2 a.m. here, so hopefully will still make sense.

What is "kindness"?
Kindness is, for me, about intention. It is not about fixing things for other people. It is about speaking and acting from a place of love. People know when you come from that place as opposed to coming from a place of power over them.

Is it kind to give unqualified acceptance to the pragmatically incorrect position of another, or kind to enlighten them with facts?

When I was a child welfare worker, I often had to say very tough things to people. And when I spoke to them from love, without malice, they could hear the intention (even when it was something like... You can't care for your son. I know you love him, but you aren't capable. Here is what has happened) I do not hold myself up to the standard of the Dalai Lama, nor do I even pretend to be enlightened. I just am doing my best, and sometimes I suck at it. And then I must be compassionate and loving to myself.

In the case above. I did give unqualified acceptance to another person. And the man was pragmatically incorrect about something. The father thought he could care for his son, but he couldn't But finding the truth of the matter - his absolute love for his son - was the focus of our discussion. Rather than dwelling on his inability, acknowledging his deeper truth was kind. And it allowed him some measure of peace as his child was moved to his mother's home where the child could be better cared for. And it recognized his dignity as a man to make the hard decision to allow someone else to raise his son.

As you can see, the two - accepting them and enlightening them - are not mutually exclusive.

I never thought of my words as "tough kindness" but I suppose you have quite a term there.

Best,
sunshine (who really is turning off the computer and going to bed...)

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