LadyPact
Posts: 32566
Status: offline
|
Cutting down only for the sake of brevity. quote:
ORIGINAL: leadership527 True, I have a very clear idea of what M/s means to me. But here's a real life situation. I had Carol uncollared recently because she WASN'T matching up to that bar. Even more alarmingly, I'd come to the conclusion that the effort to do so was bad for her. But one night we were going over to friends. She didn't want to deal with the questions. So I put the collar on. It kind of hurt me to see it there, but I'm a big boy, I can handle it. That momentary situation did not in any way alter the larger reality. We both knew it. It was a pragmatic choice to not introduce unnecessary stress into an already stressful moment in our lives. Truthfully, I'd have probably canceled the social engagement. Especially if it were a case of us going to someone else's home, rather than them coming to Mine. Still, I can see your logic in wanting to shield Carol from questions in regard to something that was there before that wasn't there now. Maybe I'm reading too much into the situation, but that's not the parallel that I'm drawing. (I'm sure lovingpet will correct Me if I'm wrong.) I see a vast difference between not being put in a situation where Carol would have to deal with explaining something that was there and then lost, and lovingpet's situation of something that wasn't there yet. From the little that I have to go on here, that's the key to this whole business. quote:
Again, perhaps I'm just being extra shy about the judgement from afar thing seeing as Carol and I were just on the receiving end of that with our now ex-friends. Unfortunately, Jeff, I do think that is influencing you. I'm not saying that's a bad thing. I do think that, if we were sitting in the same room, I'd look you straight in the face and tell you that I don't think you're quite done coming to terms with that. Take it from a sadist, My friend. Pain, will absolutely, change your view...... At least for the moment. quote:
You and I are in total agreement on this. And, as you know, I'm a pretty big believer in taking the "T" part seriously. I almost feel like we are arguing more about "big picture" and "small picture" stuff than the settling for less description. Here's a question for you? By removing Carol's collar then replacing it again (twice now), did I reduce it's value? I would say "yes I did." On the other hand, subsequent experiences have increased it's value -- dramatically. Overall, I'd say I'm a net winner in a vastly huge way. Two steps back, 4000 steps forward :) Well, it's a good question. One that, unfortunately, I can't answer from experience. Or, fortunately, depending on how you want to look at it. To this point, I have never had to remove My collar from clip. Yes, there have been times that he has tread dangerous ground of Me doing so, but it's never quite come to that. I would think that, if I did, the both of us accept all that comes with it. That includes our potential discomfort. While I might change My opinion should that situation present itself, I don't really see Myself putting on a show for others in hopes of avoiding that. Your outcome was obviously a success. If it wasn't, how long would the charade continue? quote:
In that same way, did he perhaps diminish the value of the colllar in some way with this action? Probably yes. Do I see that as some sort of problem? No. I'm waiting for the story to finish before I render that judgement but as it sits, I'm seeing this as a pragmatic move on his part that is likely to turn out well when all the chips are counted. You know, some people read the last part of the book first, so they know how it turns out. Others, start out with the first page and don't jump ahead so they can experience every part of the story. I never read the last page first. Doing so only makes you less entralled with the good parts in-between.
< Message edited by LadyPact -- 5/19/2010 2:10:23 PM >
_____________________________
The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie. Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread
|