i goofed up

i goofed up (Full Version)

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bestheadyet -> i goofed up (5/18/2010 7:07:34 PM)
what does a newbie do when she has screwed up and displeased her Master. ??? i am a sub with slave mentality and intent. i lost focus with soooo many new changes trying to be the slave i want to be. i guess i need moral support so im turning to you all.

AquaticSub -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 7:08:56 PM)
What does anyone, in any type of relationship, do when they fuck up? Apologize sincerely, outline how you plan to improve and then follow through.

rajaa -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 7:12:08 PM)
be open and honest....exlain why you "goofed" ask for help NOT to do it again....and begging for punishment because of the "goof up" is always a good touch.

bestheadyet -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 7:12:25 PM)
ty AS....i need a hug i think

AquaticSub -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 7:18:26 PM)
You are quite welcome. I, obviously, don't know what happened. But all you can do from here is keep moving forward, one little step at the time. As long as they are moving with you, you'll get there before you know it. [:)]

SimplyMichael -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 7:20:19 PM)
Don't forget, many online and new '"masters" use "you fucked up" to guilt you into doing whatever it was you wouldn't do last night on cam.

DarkSteven -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 7:27:44 PM)
Say fifteen Hail Marys. Seriously, that depends. If you served him his favorite drink and forgot the lemon slice, he'll get over it. If you went to the local bar and got screwed by fifteen drunks, that's something else altogether. Cheer up. There's a good chance that the two of you can get past this.

bestheadyet -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 8:07:27 PM)
ty for your input....especially dark s. i am on a regimented diet....and fell off the wagon......the point is i let him down and he now wants a new declaration of my dedication to my plan. im gonna have to seek my empathy elsewhere i spose

DarkSteven -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 8:18:04 PM)
Hijacking somewhat.. I have heard that it is dang near impossible to drop a habit without adding another in its place. Perhaps exercise?

bestheadyet -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 8:20:58 PM)
its part of the plan ds....as well as a new med but M is a health conscious eater.....i never have been ...but He knew this from beginning

Aylee -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 8:42:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: bestheadyet ty for your input....especially dark s. i am on a regimented diet....and fell off the wagon......the point is i let him down and he now wants a new declaration of my dedication to my plan. im gonna have to seek my empathy elsewhere i spose Okay. . . my thoughts. . . Do you know WHY you fell off the wagon? Because until you can figure that out there is no declaration that you can make that will work in the long run. You need to figure out why and fix your diet plan to take that into account. I also think that it says something about the situation that you state that you "let him down" but do not mention letting yourself down. I may be reading too much into this though. However, if you are really wanting to make a lifestyle change, and that is what a new diet is, then him feeling let down should coeincide with you feeling as though you have let yourself down. But overall I think that you should start with some self-reflection.

leadership527 -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 9:44:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub What does anyone, in any type of relationship, do when they fuck up? Apologize sincerely, outline how you plan to improve and then follow through. applause

sweetsub1957 -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 9:58:56 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael Don't forget, many online and new '"masters" use "you fucked up" to guilt you into doing whatever it was you wouldn't do last night on cam. Absolutely. quote: ORIGINAL: Aylee I also think that it says something about the situation that you state that you "let him down" but do not mention letting yourself down. I may be reading too much into this though. However, if you are really wanting to make a lifestyle change, and that is what a new diet is, then him feeling let down should coeincide with you feeling as though you have let yourself down. But overall I think that you should start with some self-reflection. Maybe that's the problem. Maybe she really didn't want to make that diet change but He did want her to....maybe it was His idea and not hers. Sometimes it's really hard to stick with a big change like that when you really don't want to do it. She did say "i am on a regimented diet" and "M is a health conscious eater.....i never have been," so He's trying to get her to change what's probably a life-long habit. That's not easy. So a person just has to take that one day at a time. ~sweetsub~

AquaticSub -> RE: i goofed up (5/18/2010 10:04:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: bestheadyet ty for your input....especially dark s. i am on a regimented diet....and fell off the wagon......the point is i let him down and he now wants a new declaration of my dedication to my plan. im gonna have to seek my empathy elsewhere i spose When it comes to diet, part of outlining your improvement may involve sitting down and going "I'm not ready to commit to this level. I need you to work with me and help me find a way that will work for me". Just because it works for him doesn't mean you can stick to it. That doesn't mean abandoning the goals he's set for you - there are many ways to reach the same point.

jbcurious -> RE: i goofed up (5/19/2010 12:19:14 AM)
I feel your pain! Weightloss is difficult and as we get older becomes more so. I need to lose 30 lbs and it's something that I've discussed with my "potenial". We've come up with a motivational system that brings 3 factors into play. The first is that we both love corsetts...he wants to order a custom corsett 2" smaller then what I would wear now, having that in front of me and my desire to wear it will be of great motivation when I'm dreading the trip to the gym as I'm a very healthy eater but haven't done much on the exercise. Since I'm also very sexually motivated... an orgasm for each pound lost at the end of the week is also a good incentive for me. The third factor is the fact that he wants to lose the same amount of weight, his issue isn't exercise as he's vert sports oriented but is food related which will help me to be even more conciencious of the foods I serve in helping him to achieve his goals and will make me be creative in distracting him from his tendency to snack...example: do you really want that bag of crisps or would a blowjob make you happier? [:)] I think you and M. need to sit down a figure out what sort of motivation will help to keep you on track.

myotherself -> RE: i goofed up (5/19/2010 12:21:43 AM)
~FR~ What everyone else has said. OP - Bear in mind it is YOU who is making all these changes. One or two small changes are pretty straightforward to handle. Try to make too many changes, or even too big a change in a short space of time and there's a high chance you'll mess up occasionally. It's only human [:)] Talk to your master. Maybe get him to rein back a bit on the 'all or nothing' diet change. Maybe remove some unhealthy elements from your diet and exchange them for something healthier. And do this gradually over weeks and months, not an instant change. Please don't think that people hear aren't empathising with you. You got a lot of helpful, friendly advice here. You even got a certain amount of sympathy. If you just need a hug, then go to the off-topic fora and post there - you'll (maybe) get all the hugs you need! [:D]

lally2 -> RE: i goofed up (5/19/2010 12:35:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: bestheadyet ty for your input....especially dark s. i am on a regimented diet....and fell off the wagon......the point is i let him down and he now wants a new declaration of my dedication to my plan. im gonna have to seek my empathy elsewhere i spose in the scheme of things that isnt such a big goof up - we all fall off the wagon at times its all about being human. i dont really see that as a major failure on youre part, just a glitch in youre diet plan. you personally need to tell youreself why you want to lose this weight and why its important to you. if you have a pair of jeans you want to get into set youreself a goal and stick to it. i think its quite difficult to give something up, like food or some other freedom of choice along those lines for someone else. mentally you have to do it for youreself too. if you switch the emphasis of this diet over to it being youre priority for you, supported by youre Master you might find it a bit easier and then if you fall off the wagon it isnt so much about letting him down but more a shared glitch. what id do is relaunch back into diet mode, pick up on the exercise programme and show him youre doing this because you want to do it too. i think at the moment its his thing and youre just going along with it.

bestheadyet -> RE: i goofed up (5/19/2010 4:17:58 AM)
i want to dispel any thoughts of it was His idea over mine......i have used my weight as a shield on and off for years. more to come

bestheadyet -> RE: i goofed up (5/19/2010 4:24:42 AM)
~FR~ What everyone else has said. OP - Bear in mind it is YOU who is making all these changes. One or two small changes are pretty straightforward to handle. Try to make too many changes, or even too big a change in a short space of time and there's a high chance you'll mess up occasionally. It's only human [:)] Talk to your master. Maybe get him to rein back a bit on the 'all or nothing' diet change. He is a 'do it' or 'don't do it' kind of guy. Never had an addiction to anything. Whereas I'm beginning my second week of no smoking...newbie at exercise classes x 1 month.........and now the diet...... i am biting off a lot right now.....plus Master and i are new. ty for your input.......

bestheadyet -> RE: i goofed up (5/19/2010 4:35:22 AM)
ty sweetsub!

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