RE: How do you see yourself?

RE: How do you see yourself? (Full Version)

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Icarys -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 8:39:00 AM)
The joking? Did the fact that I didn't say all nice things about you bother you a bit?

Lucienne -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 8:41:01 AM)
This topic has given me some very interesting thoughts. Which I will now try to distill down to something remotely interesting for others. I think the major difference between online message board communication and real life communication is online you don't have as much freedom to tailor your message to individuals. Posting on a message board is kind of like standing on the street corner with a bullhorn, it's not working the room at a party. When I post here, I post with the idea of communicating with people who are either on my same wave length or close enough, communication wise, that we can have a meaningful (even if only amusing) conversation. Doing so normally involves some incidental, not quite causing offense, but I'm sending a signal and some people are going to find it off-putting, others will just ignore it. The people who find it off-putting are left with some sense of my personality (uncomfortably different from theirs), but in real life communication with those sorts of people, I would communicate on a more common ground basis. Real life doesn't force me to choose between connecting with those on my same wavelength and those off of it, because in real life I'm not on a stage talking to everyone at once. In real life, I generally try to find ways to make positive connections with all people I come in contact with. Online... I confess, not so much. Having met quite a few people in real life that I'd only known from message boards, the reports were that I'm pretty much exactly what they expected me to be - personality wise. But then... I've never met the people from message boards who think I'm an uppity bitch. I'd like to think I could con/charm them into liking me too. [:D]

sunshinemiss -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 8:42:52 AM)
Hello Icarys, I didn't see that as joking. Was thinking of nipping it in the bud. Thank you for clarifying and I apologize for the misunderstanding. Not saying all nice things about me? Well, that would be lying, now wouldn't it? We all have a shadow side. We all are broken in some way. I did not hear anything that wasn't real and honest. And I appreciate it. By the way, you wouldn't know this, but I hate the word "nice". It is the opposite of authentic. I'd rather be authentically a screw up and not "nice" every day of the week and twice on Sunday! Best, sunshine

InvisibleBlack -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 8:46:03 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss How do you see your personality? I tend to view myself as a great big idiot cleverly disguised as a debonair space pirate. quote: Is it the same online as offline? From what I've been told, I'm pretty much the same online and off only I'm much more intense in person. quote: Do you express yourself differently? Of course. I can't make the gestures and faces online. quote: Is there something you do differently here versus in real life, face to face meetings/discussions? Not that I'm aware of. Although the range of topics that come up tends to be more varied in person - but this is a specialty site. Oh. Yes. In real life conversations no one can see my typos.

sunshinemiss -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 8:47:08 AM)
quote: When I post here, I post with the idea of communicating with people who are either on my same wave length or close enough, communication wise, that we can have a meaningful (even if only amusing) conversation. Hello Lucienne, The words above made me think of something.... (and I just got off the phone with hejira) [:)] There are things that I don't talk about here, specifically scientific, dry things, research, etc. because I think they would be deadly dull to the general poster. I think it may skew things a bit for me, but I also don't believe it's helpful to bore people. Hejira and I often talk about our nerdy, geeky things together! I like to think I show that side of me by quoting Star Trek or putting up links to something quirky. But in depth scientific mumbo jumbo... No. Maybe I'm a little geekier in real life. Best, sunshine

Icarys -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 8:51:24 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss Hello Icarys, I didn't see that as joking. Was thinking of nipping it in the bud. Thank you for clarifying and I apologize for the misunderstanding. Not saying all nice things about me? Well, that would be lying, now wouldn't it? We all have a shadow side. We all are broken in some way. I did not hear anything that wasn't real and honest. And I appreciate it. By the way, you wouldn't know this, but I hate the word "nice". It is the opposite of authentic. I'd rather be authentically a screw up and not "nice" every day of the week and twice on Sunday! Best, sunshine Well I can't speak for her but I was joking. No problem. I actually enjoy that word but find most people don't or can't live up to it..authentic would be a good substitution for it. Although the word doesn't change the person or my desire to connect them with that word either.

sunshinemiss -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 8:52:36 AM)
All right, you darling people... It's one a.m. and I must get myself to bed! Good night and have a great day to those of you on the other side of the earth! best, sunshine

TreasureKY -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 9:01:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss I'm glad the topic is being so well-enjoyed. It would be interesting to hear if other people see us as we see ourselves (but that's a whole different thread I suppose). I'd thought of starting a thread on something similar, but restricted to positive comments. Animosity shows through in many of the threads here, particularly in the Politics and Religion forum... however, while there are people here with whom I might disagree, I still find them admirable. I don't think that comes out much, in general. There's not much opportunity... graceful opportunity, that is... to insert in mid-argument things like, "you're an idiot on this subject, but nonetheless, I've always had the impression that you are someone who is intelligent, articulate, and otherwise open-minded and reasonable. I like that about you." I think it would be an interesting exercise to ask people to post what they admire or appreciate about the other posters. Unfortunately, I'm not so certain that the thread could stay on topic, and even less certain that it could stay positive. With regard to your original question, I don't think I post often enough for my "online persona" to be even remotely like what I am in real life. I do post true to myself... I don't put on airs or adopt aspects that aren't really me... but the limited areas where I have posted wouldn't be enough to even begin to give the vaguest and one-dimensional shadow of who I really am.

sirsholly -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 9:04:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: fluffypet61 On-line i try to be up-beat and positive. i save the depression, tears, and hopeless feelings for private times. our circumstances are different, but i can relate to Fluffy since my accident. Plus i fight isolating because my speech, hearing and thought process can be abnormal. Real life doesn't come with an edit button.[:(]

laurell3 -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 9:07:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys quote: ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19 Er, its not really possible for him to poke you in the eye without a ladder... I used "kneel bitch" and it worked..much to her dismay! Your next... Wake up, you're dreaming Icarys!

Icarys -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 9:33:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys quote: ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19 Er, its not really possible for him to poke you in the eye without a ladder... I used "kneel bitch" and it worked..much to her dismay! Your next... Wake up, you're dreaming Icarys! It was more of a nightmare..it scared me so much..I lashed out and blacked your eye. (Shivers) Someone hold me?

Missokyst -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 10:04:25 AM)
I am not sure how others see me here though I suspect it is as a know it all. I do know I am the same here as anywhere else. I speak when something calls to me. If I see that others have had similar patterns as I, I will open up about my own because I have examined them and know nothing is clear without all the evidence. I don't mind ripping my guts out to reveal what is inside. I rarely engage in playful banter, not because I am not playful (among my own I am) but because I fear not being part of the group. Which is odd since I have gone out of my way not to be a sheep. I stand aside, observe and wait for my chance to be seen. In that, I can be quite the peacock. I fear new things but I relish the moment I can move beyond that and be the star. In my life I have been singer a dancer and a public speaker, even though I have phobia's up the wazoo. Much of how I view life is either as a prop, or as the one on stage. This fits in well to running groups. I enjoy making things possible for other people. I rarely try to monopolize the conversations within the groups I run. I much prefer that they mix and mingle and allow me to sit back. I do speak up when I think things need some spark to get started again. I believe they view me as a leader and unless they know me well, they also see a dominant personality. However... that is part of my stage persona. If I am onstage I am the star. Otherwise I am a prop. People scare me. Life scares me. Being outside of my house scares me. Loud scares me. I just think that is part of my life and I do everything I can to push beyond that. I have been successful in that no one can see my fear unless I allow it. I go out to large events, have had a few long tern relationships, run groups, and attended concerts... just like normal people only I have to force myself to do them. Once out, I can handle anything. I am the same here as anywhere. Quiet, but when I speak it is a roar.

laurell3 -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 10:21:31 AM)
Missokyst, Thank you for sharing that. I've never seen you that way personally. I'll always found your posts to be based on your own personal experiences and honest as well as receptive to the fact that others may not feel the same way.

Missokyst -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 10:24:33 AM)
:) thanks laurell. I think fear rules how I think others might view me.

Aynne88 -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 3:58:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys quote: ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19 Er, its not really possible for him to poke you in the eye without a ladder... I used "kneel bitch" and it worked..much to her dismay! Your next... Wake up, you're dreaming Icarys! It was more of a nightmare..it scared me so much..I lashed out and blacked your eye. (Shivers) Someone hold me? You called? C'mere, I have a blanket, and some Grand Marnier. I'll trade a slap for a foot massage too. [;)].

sunshinemiss -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 4:00:40 PM)
That Aynne, always prepared!

Icarys -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 4:39:56 PM)
quote: You called? C'mere, I have a blanket, and some Grand Marnier. I'll trade a slap for a foot massage too. . [:D]

LaTigresse -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 5:50:14 PM)
You know, I really don't know how people see me. Either in person or online. Especially online. Three things people have said about me to me, that always surprises me when I hear it. Often I am thought to be stuck up, when I'm really not. I am reserved. I just don't get close to too many people. I was told last year by a woman that has known me for over 20 years, is that I am still an enigma to her. Surprising because I rarely filter myself with her. And I am still surprised that people are intimidated by me, or afraid of me. GD says it is my self confidence and accompanying fearlessness. Combine that with my blunt, call em as I see em, I guess it often frightens people. Something difficult for me to understand. Especially considering that I speak very little of what is playing in my head. I probably type more of it here that I speak. Not many people say the stuff in person, that they type on here. Very few people ask perfect strangers for advice on personal issues. So, how I dffer or not, I really don't know for certain. Simply because I am not sure how people view me here at all.

Level -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 6:37:44 PM)
quote: Not many people say the stuff in person, that they type on here. Very few people ask perfect strangers for advice on personal issues. I often go into the library and ask a group of strangers, "Does a dom ever flog with his non-dominant arm?" That's when they make me leave. quote: So, how I dffer or not, I really don't know for certain. Simply because I am not sure how people view me here at all. Passionate, lusty (with the wrong sex [8D] ), determined, sensible. Not needing to be patted on the back, so perhaps uncomfortable with praise.

Lve -> RE: How do you see yourself? (6/6/2010 8:05:35 PM)
Like the great Jim Morrison said, I see myself as an intelligent, sensitive human, with the soul of a clown which forces me to blow it at the most important moments.

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