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Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:06:58 PM   
Glasgow


Posts: 248
Joined: 6/7/2010
Status: offline 		Well, much to the fury of concerned older men everywhere that sent me messages telling me to be careful, I've gone and jumped into the BDSM pool with both feet -- I'm meeting someone from CM tomorrow.

We're both local and have texted for about a week. Although, I've never met anyone from the Internet before, much less for something like this, and I'd appreciate any advice. Especially from that IronBear guy. He's awesome.


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I wash my hands of this weirdness.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:11:45 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Well where are you meeting and for what purpose?  Bring condoms.

Generally, just be yourself, relax, hang out, use good sense, follow your instincts.

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"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Glasgow)
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RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:13:20 PM   
MercilessMarcy


Posts: 80
Joined: 11/12/2006
Status: offline 		It's pretty basic stuff. Meet in a public place. Chat for a while. Make sure someone else you trust knows where you are and what your plans are. Have them text or call you. (excuse me, I have to take this phone call) Trust your gut, don't dismiss anything you feel MIGHT be a red flag. Never do anything you are not comfortable doing. That's pretty much it. GO HAVE FUN!

(in reply to Glasgow)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:15:54 PM   
slavelynn95008


Posts: 35
Joined: 12/22/2007
Status: offline 		We've all been through it and most of us survived just fine. You have just as much chance in the fetish world meeting jack the ripper as you do in the real world meeting up with a stranger you only met online. Same precautions as in the real world. Bring a phone. Tell a friend. Meet in a coffeeshop or bookstore (with security cameras). Note the license plate. Don't go driving with him unless you're really comfortable. Text your friend with a keyword where you end up and when you're safe again. You know. The normal stuff.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:16:43 PM   
Glasgow


Posts: 248
Joined: 6/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Well where are you meeting and for what purpose?  Bring condoms.

Generally, just be yourself, relax, hang out, use good sense, follow your instincts.


He's a Dom. We're meeting to see if there is any possible future of enslavement. I don't plan to sleep with him as soon as tomorrow - which is probably good, because I am broke and out of condoms.

We are meeting in a very public place, which I am well familiar with. It's a cluster of restaurants, expensive boutiques, a movie theater, and a Starbucks. We will be meeting at the Starbucks.


_____________________________

I wash my hands of this weirdness.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:19:47 PM   
DomImus


Posts: 2004
Joined: 3/17/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MercilessMarcy
Meet in a public place.
Chat for a while.
Make sure someone else you trust knows where you are and what your plans are.
Have them text or call you. (excuse me, I have to take this phone call)


All good suggestions.

We broke all of these rules. Maybe I should just watch this thread instead of offering any advice.


_____________________________

"Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." Sidney J. harris

(in reply to MercilessMarcy)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:21:55 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow
He's a Dom. We're meeting to see if there is any possible future of enslavement. I don't plan to sleep with him as soon as tomorrow - which is probably good, because I am broke and out of condoms.



Regardless - take condoms!
Doesn't matter if you are broke if you are in the UK(haven't looked, I'm just goign by your name!). Just go to the docs early tomorrow morning before the meet and pick yourself up some freebies.  They can either do you a prescription or hand them to your there and then.  Not many people realise/know that getting condoms from the doctors is like picking up the pill.  Either that or pop into your local std checking clinic/hospital and get some.

the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to Glasgow)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:23:26 PM   
Glasgow


Posts: 248
Joined: 6/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DomImus

quote:

ORIGINAL: MercilessMarcy
Meet in a public place.
Chat for a while.
Make sure someone else you trust knows where you are and what your plans are.
Have them text or call you. (excuse me, I have to take this phone call)


All good suggestions.

We broke all of these rules. Maybe I should just watch this thread instead of offering any advice.



I would like to say that when combined with your avatar, your sense of "safe activities" must be magnificent.

quote:

Make sure someone else you trust knows where you are and what your plans are

Heh... forgot about this one
See, this is why I come to the internet! My brain makes so many mistakes, but you guys are never wrong :)


_____________________________

I wash my hands of this weirdness.

(in reply to DomImus)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:24:12 PM   
VaguelyCurious


Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DomImus

We broke all of these rules.

I broke all those rules too.  But I am also not very good at crossing roads, so maybe don't do as I do on this one. :P

You can break all the rules and be fine. It is exceedingly likely that you will be fine. The chances of you not being fine are pretty damn minimal.

But that doesn't mean it's not worth that little bit of effort to reduce them further-I've done things in the past that I wouldn't do again, regardless of the fact that I emerged unscathed those times.

ETA my actual advice:

Enjoy! This stuff can be hella fun
Eat something before you go if your blood-sugar is likely to throw a wobbly.
Remember that you're young and cute and female and therefore the numbers mean you get your absolute pick-if you feel like you're settling then stop and ask yourself why.

Good luck


< Message edited by VaguelyCurious -- 6/10/2010 3:28:57 PM >

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(in reply to DomImus)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:25:14 PM   
Glasgow


Posts: 248
Joined: 6/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RCdc

quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow
He's a Dom. We're meeting to see if there is any possible future of enslavement. I don't plan to sleep with him as soon as tomorrow - which is probably good, because I am broke and out of condoms.



Regardless - take condoms!
Doesn't matter if you are broke if you are in the UK(haven't looked, I'm just goign by your name!). Just go to the docs early tomorrow morning before the meet and pick yourself up some freebies.  They can either do you a prescription or hand them to your there and then.  Not many people realise/know that getting condoms from the doctors is like picking up the pill.  Either that or pop into your local std checking clinic/hospital and get some.

the.dark.


I'm actually in America, but your advice does hold true here. The only problem is that to get free condoms from Planned Parenthood (I'm not sure if you all have them over there?) you have to go in for an appointment. The schedule is at least a week back and walk-ins wait hours or don't get served, so it's a tough situation.

This would not be a problem had my older sister not stolen 20 of my condoms to prevent me from having sex.

_____________________________

I wash my hands of this weirdness.

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:27:12 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow
I'm actually in America, but your advice does hold true here. The only problem is that to get free condoms from Planned Parenthood (I'm not sure if you all have them over there?) you have to go in for an appointment. The schedule is at least a week back and walk-ins wait hours or don't get served, so it's a tough situation.

This would not be a problem had my older sister not stolen 20 of my condoms to prevent me from having sex.


Ah that'll learn me to perv a profile!
Sucks about the waiting list for the appointment.  We can pretty much get a same day even to see a nurse and walk in clinics you can just pick up from.

the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to Glasgow)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:29:10 PM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline 		The university clinics here give them out for free. Try that if you have any around you.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to Glasgow)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:29:21 PM   
Glasgow


Posts: 248
Joined: 6/7/2010
Status: offline 		What if I just make him promise he doesn't have a disease? That's basically the same as the protection a condom provides, right?

_____________________________

I wash my hands of this weirdness.

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:30:23 PM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow

What if I just make him promise he doesn't have a disease? That's basically the same as the protection a condom provides, right?



Are you kidding me?


_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to Glasgow)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:31:12 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow

What if I just make him promise he doesn't have a disease? That's basically the same as the protection a condom provides, right?


Doesn't matter whether he promises or not.  You are responsible for your own sexual health regardless.  After all he might not even know if he is disease free or not.

the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to Glasgow)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:33:02 PM   
Glasgow


Posts: 248
Joined: 6/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3


quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow

What if I just make him promise he doesn't have a disease? That's basically the same as the protection a condom provides, right?



Are you kidding me?



Yup.

Don't worry, no unprotected sex for Glasgow. I have been well-instilled with fear of infected man-parts from my mandatory sexual education classes.


_____________________________

I wash my hands of this weirdness.

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:33:09 PM   
DaddysInkedSlut


Posts: 1837
Joined: 5/14/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow

quote:

ORIGINAL: RCdc

quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow
He's a Dom. We're meeting to see if there is any possible future of enslavement. I don't plan to sleep with him as soon as tomorrow - which is probably good, because I am broke and out of condoms.



Regardless - take condoms!
Doesn't matter if you are broke if you are in the UK(haven't looked, I'm just goign by your name!). Just go to the docs early tomorrow morning before the meet and pick yourself up some freebies.  They can either do you a prescription or hand them to your there and then.  Not many people realise/know that getting condoms from the doctors is like picking up the pill.  Either that or pop into your local std checking clinic/hospital and get some.

the.dark.


I'm actually in America, but your advice does hold true here. The only problem is that to get free condoms from Planned Parenthood (I'm not sure if you all have them over there?) you have to go in for an appointment. The schedule is at least a week back and walk-ins wait hours or don't get served, so it's a tough situation.

This would not be a problem had my older sister not stolen 20 of my condoms to prevent me from having sex.



I agree take condoms just incase. In maryland and California you can simply walk into the health dept. and ask for a brown bag and get a lunch bag full of condoms. Lol



_____________________________


(in reply to Glasgow)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:33:35 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		Make him promise that you won't get pregnant too!

Sweetie?.. he might not even know he has a disease

_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to Glasgow)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:34:06 PM   
VaguelyCurious


Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

Are you kidding me?



Mods, please please please can we have a sarcasm font? It would make everyone's lives so much easier...


_____________________________

Sthetic on FetLife.




(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Meeting someone from CM tomorrow - need advice - 6/10/2010 3:34:53 PM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3


quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow

What if I just make him promise he doesn't have a disease? That's basically the same as the protection a condom provides, right?



Are you kidding me?



Yup.

Don't worry, no unprotected sex for Glasgow. I have been well-instilled with fear of infected man-parts from my mandatory sexual education classes.



haha that's not funny, I was alarmed that you really thought that and was trying to figure out on how god's green earth you could navigate engaging in safe bdsm........


_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to Glasgow)
Profile   Post #: 20
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