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RE: Intimidated by your s-type? - 6/14/2010 12:04:22 PM   
pyroaquatic


Posts: 1535
Joined: 12/4/2006
From: Pyroaquatica
Status: offline 		If one is intimidated simply peel some layers back and enjoy some intimacy.

Luckily my demeanor is passive and gentle. If I intimidate anyone there is a reason for it. Self-defense and whatnot.

usually I am on the end of "Why does she want to be around me?" I'm moderately special with excess baggage.


_____________________________

You are what your deep, driving desire is.
As your desire is, so is your will.
As your will is, so is your deed.
As your deed is, so is your destiny.
-Brihadaranyaka Upanishad IV.4.5

(in reply to BKSir)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Intimidated by your s-type? - 6/14/2010 1:35:23 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
Not to pick on Jeff...
Why not? Did they FINALLY implement that new TOS I've been lobbying for?

quote:

My girls have faults they are not perfect or near perfection.. but non the less..... there are times I look at what I have and it's oh my god.... I wouldn't use the word Intimidated... But I am clearly humbled at enjoying what I have. If I ever stop being humbled by it... I think it would reflect less of me in character than I would care to consider.
You and I see it exactly identically except I'm content with jumbling up "intimidated" with "humbled". The part I bolded was particularly meaningful to me. I would not care to be the type of person who could take Carol for granted.

quote:

There is no question That I percieve my girls worthy of the best and often far more than I preceive that I could ever give. But this is only half of the equation. For my girls without doubt beleive themselves to have the very best and wish they could only do more for me. I deal with by remembering that I only have half of the equation. They choose me... they choose me for a reason! If they are so incredible... maybe I should just accept they have a good reason for being in my life as I have for being in theirs!
Wow, you mean your relationship is bidirectional too? *chuckles* I had heard that TRUE M/s relationships were all about the dominant (well, that and knitting). More seriously, again you and I are on the same page. I'm not seeing the part where you "picked on me" yet. I think you're slipping Knight :)

In truth, what i think is that if both parties perceive they need to work a little harder, then all is well. It is that sort of drive that inspires excellence. When that feeling gets out of hand though, then it becomes debilitating and crippling.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Intimidated by your s-type? - 6/14/2010 3:59:33 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cassandria

isn't that a wonderful quality to be able to instill in someone...to be able to inspire them to be better, to grow, to achieve?

Scary thought perhaps if you interpret it in the way of "I'll never have the kind of person I want because I'm not good enough"...

But what if you thought about it in the sense that he would see unlimited potential in you...and inspire you to shed what may have been holding you back, encourage you to set/pursue goals that before you didn't feel capable of achieving, all the while loving you for the woman you are...but also seeing what you will become, and loving her as well?


Well I think we are close to saying the same thing, with slight, subtle differences.

In terms of my own personal potential, throughout my life, I've had people encourage me, but I've gotten to where I am because I've pushed myself, and if my mother were here she'd attest that no one has ever pushed me harder than I have myself.

In terms of how I look at someone, when I see a man that I'm attracted in, I don't see "the potential" in him but rather I see the actualized man. I'm looking for a whole person, not a project. I have no desire to live out any kind of Pygmalion fantasy.

What I see is the potential that he and I can be together, as partners. And if we are in a a truly healthy dynamic, we will both flourish and inspire one another to grow faster.

- LA

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Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to cassandria)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: Intimidated by your s-type? - 6/14/2010 8:53:57 PM   
cassandria


Posts: 86
Joined: 6/6/2010
Status: offline 		*grins*...we might be coming at this from a different angle, as different women..for sure. Being that you're holding the cane and all...

I have no issue with being someone's "project", as long as there's an understanding that it's for my benefit in terms of my own happiness, and for the benefit of our relationship, our future, as a couple. For myself, I'm loathe to even attempt to change anyone, feeling that people have every right to be where they're at, and appreciated as such. I willingly submit to being guided and influenced - at times in directions I wouldn't go by myself, even - as that is part of the dynamic as Master/slave, but obviously that isn't for everyone.

Like you, I tend to push myself, to reach down deep and develop within myself what's needed to move ahead with my life...I just also allow myself to be guided and directed within a relationship, when I'm in one.

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 84
RE: Intimidated by your s-type? - 6/14/2010 8:58:14 PM   
FetishRose


Posts: 212
Joined: 8/7/2008
Status: offline 		My Sir and I constantly joke about this, actually.  Both of us are the wee-est bit intimidated by each other in that sense.  I look at him and see this tall, gorgeous man with abs of steel, and gorgeous green eyes, and feel slightly inadequate.  Whereas he says that he looks at me and sees a perfectly curved, wickedly gorgeous woman, who is utterly depraved in her desire to please him.
So, yeah.  It happens.  He actually enjoys feeling like that, as he says from lounging on the couch, "I get to show you off."



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Rose-y Pose-y, Puddin' Pie. Kissed Some Dommes and Made Them Cry.

(in reply to BKSir)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Intimidated by your s-type? - 6/14/2010 9:42:37 PM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline 		~ Fast Reply ~

I believe in my relationship, we're humbled by each other.  And it's pretty damn cool, I must say.  A little more than a year into this and our influences on each other are obvious.  His daughter is constantly telling me "We don't deserve you" and he just smiles lovingly at me when she says it.  And I keep looking at him, wondering, how the hell did we find each other??

I think what keeps it real between us, is we've both said we're here because we want to be here, not because we need to be here.  He knows he is not my crutch. He knows he is not my savior. He knows I can function perfectly well on my own.  He knows I belong to him because he rocks my world, and because there is nowhere in this world I'd rather be than with him, because of how damn happy I am when I'm around him. 

Because of that, he can trust in the fact that I belong to him because of who he is and what I see in him.  And I think he prefers that.


_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to FetishRose)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Intimidated by your s-type? - 6/14/2010 11:00:14 PM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida

I think what keeps it real between us, is we've both said we're here because we want to be here, not because we need to be here.


This. And you're uberly fabulous as well.

~porcelaine


_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to NuevaVida)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Intimidated by your s-type? - 6/15/2010 7:52:42 AM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine

quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida

I think what keeps it real between us, is we've both said we're here because we want to be here, not because we need to be here.


This. And you're uberly fabulous as well.

~porcelaine



Aww, thanks, friend. 

It's a concept I used to see KOM and Kyra talk about a lot, and I'd scratch my head, not understanding it.  Now that some years and experiences have gone by, this concept has not only become crystal clear to me, but essential.

And you're pretty uberly fabulous, yourself


_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to porcelaine)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Intimidated by your s-type? - 6/15/2010 8:14:51 AM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		Awwwww... let's all HUG!

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"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to NuevaVida)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Intimidated by your s-type? - 6/15/2010 9:46:29 AM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

In terms of how I look at someone, when I see a man that I'm attracted in, I don't see "the potential" in him but rather I see the actualized man. I'm looking for a whole person, not a project. I have no desire to live out any kind of Pygmalion fantasy.

What I see is the potential that he and I can be together, as partners. And if we are in a a truly healthy dynamic, we will both flourish and inspire one another to grow faster.


I concur completely. I don't spin the "he's so much more than meets the eye" thing because it usually follows with the person being misunderstood by others. That line of thinking rarely bodes well.


quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida

It's a concept I used to see KOM and Kyra talk about a lot, and I'd scratch my head, not understanding it.  Now that some years and experiences have gone by, this concept has not only become crystal clear to me, but essential.

And you're pretty uberly fabulous, yourself


Thank you doll. You've come a long way. The Man showed up when you were ready to receive him

~porcelaine


_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 90
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