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barelynangel -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/28/2010 3:20:32 PM)
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To me, you can be owned without being collared however, ownership is a clear and blatant statement by the Man because of his determination. To me, this declaration and determination is what switches me from an independent person who is self-determining to a woman who is his slave. Until i understand this determination by him, i don't and won't believe myself owned or an actual slave, a collar to me is a symbol of ownership and declares who owns you. To me, mastery however, is different from ownership, someone can master you and never determine to own you. If the OP is this off balance then to me its time to talk to him because the topic wasn't what indicated issues to me, it was the WTH at the end that clearly states a loss of trust and an indication of no respect for the Master.
As for leaving a slave alone when she displeases him, well, what do you expect -- to be given attention? Why would he want a woman around him who from what you says causes him aggravation and irritation. Maybe its not punishment so to speak but simply he doesn't want a slave who can't be pleasing around him. There is nothing wrong with that, as a Master of a slave, he has a right to determine if the slave is someone he wants to be around. The op has clearly stated she misbehaves and knows this and seems to know what it is that causes this consequence, so maybe its time for a long and yes harsh talk because it doesn't seem like either of you are content and happy in the relationship -- you with your misbehavior knowing what consequences it will bring, and him with a slave he is more content and happy NOT to have around<--- this is a BIG indication to me, ones perhaps he needs to re-evaluate.
I think the OP knows where she stands, but just doesn't like where she stands. In the end, if you want to be the man's slave, then you have to ask yourself can you be the slave he demands? He will also need to ask himself this question and seriously analyze if your potential shows enough value that its more than the cost in keeping you. Now remember i speak of being a slave. If you are a sub, then it could be a different understanding.
Personally, i would not stay around for a Man who is more content to not want me around than want me around -- bad behavior and all. When someone pushes me away, i tend to walk away. But it sounds like there are issues on your end and on his end, it sounds like you both need to look at the situation. I don't see his being more or less wrong in the bits that you have provided but there sounds to be a whole hell of a lot of game playing going on. In the end, only the players can decide if they enjoy the game.
In the end a slave either trusts him or not. Period. To me, the OP has stated loud and clear what she thinks of the man she calls Master by placing her master in a situation wherein he is judged by people who have no clue about the relationship as a whole and his perception of the whole. This to me is not actions of love and respect and trust and loyalty. Because of this, it is something very important to consider in whether or not you really want that collar.
I thought i had said this but in the end, all a collar does is identify who you belong to or that you actually belong to someone. Yes, you can be owned without being collared, but to me, that needs to be very clear between the parties because many times the collar on indicates ownership. But on or off, if the declaration of ownership has been made, a collar only symbolizes it, it doesn't declare it because the understanding should already be in place.
angel
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