RE: owned but not collared.....wth?

RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (Full Version)

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juliaoceania -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/29/2010 6:07:48 PM)
quote: I think it is admirable for people to be so outwardly caring towards this new poster. However, given that her master is evidently following this thread, I am not sure voicing those feelings here would be the best way of offering her continued support. Although I try to offer caring words to people who genuinely seem to need them, after reading her posts it reminds me of my first forays into wiitwd... I do not want to get into a debate about "sub frenzy", but she stated she is a newbie to what she is currently experiencing... thinking back about my experiences, newbiness can make a person fairly vulnerable. Boundaries become fuzzy...her dominant person might not be to blame at all, he maybe dealing with a person that is experiencing a form of sub frenzy... I don't know... I never will know.... In my world if it isn't fun, satisfying, and/or rewarding... I opt out.... I figure others are like me in that way

SirsJewel -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/29/2010 10:54:39 PM)
i have said very little as a result of her master. Being new to the thread-end of CM i see a duality of advice. You get some who start off in one direction, and wind slowly along being snarky and suddenly they care so for the poster. Does the person seeking the help follow up with a post saying,yes! problem solved? Makes a person fearful to Ever bring a concern much less a topic of discussion to the boards as a sub is unloyal towards her owner if she doesn't bring the problem to Him/Her. Isn't that what a group of "objective" folks are supposed to be? Some are so into just posting meaness on things like grammar or spelling that it truly takes from the post at hand and what was once something of importance to the poster. Sure it's fun to goof around,but not at someone's expense. To the poster. You seem to be a lovely person,who had a personal question that has been raked over the coals. Ask yourself this please? Are you happier with him than without him? You aren't in this relationship very long and have a small ammount of yourself invested overall. When you look back,you can see yourself before him. Can you go back and rethink the plan? i know i could if absolutely necessary, it's life. Being a slave does Not being miserable for your servatude and devotion. Keep in mind the Master/owner has an obligation to serve you in return and often times that's forgotten. Take yourself out of corners and put some thinking into your needs/wants and please be well ~ jewels

ranja -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 2:17:12 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave quote: ORIGINAL: bestheadyet he thrives on my uncertainty. its not the questions i get in trouble for ...its my presentation im sure....and i go into near hysteria when separated ...and dig my holes further....and regarding a collar....i think i want his declaration and clarity of where i stand.....if i am being honest Am I the only one that had huge red flags popping up from this?? it might be a huge red flag, it might also be the way they interact i think for my Husband it is quite nice when i am insecure as it makes Him feel more powerful in making the decision... i am a ditherer, i see too many sides, He is more capable of cutting through the crap and making a choice, but at times He likes to let me dither and sway until i virtually beg Him to sort it out for me. It is not that He makes me insecure (although He might toy with me like that at times to for mind-fuck purposes which can be a great emotional roller coaster ride) but it is more that i am a ditherer by nature and He enjoys watching me dither at times. if i were the op though i would work on the 'hysteria when separated', i say: you have to have some selfcontrol and get on with your own things too.

crazyml -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 2:36:10 AM)
bestheadyet - HUG! From my, very personal, perspective - I'd never explicitly "collar" someone. So anyone who is "owned" by me (although I confess, I also struggle with that term too!) is never going to be collared. The key seems to lie in what you feel the term "collar" means (and implies) and what your D feels about it. It could be that the D in question defines "ownership" in a way that is completely compatible with your definition of "collared". It could be a bunch of other things too of course - And yes, I spose the "having the fun w/o the responsibility" could be one of them. My advice, for what it's worth, is to be clear about what kind of relationship you want/need - (in terms of roles/responsibilities) and then check that your D is looking for something that is compatible. Don't get hung up on terminology - think about the outcome though. No-one "needs" a collar (or a wedding ring), they need the relationship which (for them) the collar signifies. If you're happy that you've got the relationship right, then perhaps the "collar" isn't so important?

ExSteelAgain -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 2:48:03 AM)
As long as no one writes about being "collarded" as once happened, no problem. That post brought up visions of collard greens being slapped all over the submissive.

sunshinemiss -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 2:53:51 AM)
ooooo.... I love collard greens!

ExSteelAgain -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 2:57:09 AM)
Anyone from North Georgia would. :) I wonder what the effect a mess of uncooked collard greens tied together and used as a flogger would be?

sirsholly -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 2:58:35 AM)
quote: That post brought up visions of collard greens being slapped all over the submissive. Gawd...she'd end up looking like a swamp monster.

ExSteelAgain -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 3:01:25 AM)
Creature From the Black Lagoon....1954 version.

sirsholly -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 3:02:37 AM)
shudder I saw that movie when i was a little girl and it scared the holy heck out of me!!!!

bestheadyet -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 5:10:53 AM)
ya'll are a trip.....love me some greens!!!! and the flogger from greens? priceless!!!! made my morning!!!

Aileen1968 -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 5:20:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: juliaoceania quote: I think it is admirable for people to be so outwardly caring towards this new poster. However, given that her master is evidently following this thread, I am not sure voicing those feelings here would be the best way of offering her continued support. Although I try to offer caring words to people who genuinely seem to need them, after reading her posts it reminds me of my first forays into wiitwd... I do not want to get into a debate about "sub frenzy", but she stated she is a newbie to what she is currently experiencing... thinking back about my experiences, newbiness can make a person fairly vulnerable. Boundaries become fuzzy...her dominant person might not be to blame at all, he maybe dealing with a person that is experiencing a form of sub frenzy... I don't know... I never will know.... In my world if it isn't fun, satisfying, and/or rewarding... I opt out.... I figure others are like me in that way I also accepted negative treatment from dominant men during my sub frenzy phase here. I look back and cringe at that now that I can clearly see how mentally unhealthy it was for me. I see a lot of that in the OP. She seems intelligent and will most likely have that aha moment when she realize that you can have a sadistic controlling relationship with someone who cares about you. That makes all of the difference in the world and it removes all of the doubts. The OP strikes me as someone that requires affection in a relationship. I doubt she'll get it from this man.

Jeffff -> RE: owned but not collared.....wth? (6/30/2010 6:16:40 AM)
I think Shore should make you appologize for the way you treat me!

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