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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 5:19:42 PM   
juliaoceania


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

It's a lot sadder when someone writes you specifically because you are a single mother, targeting your children.


I totally agree!


The saddest part of that is there are many more of these sorts that target single mothers in the real world.

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 5:36:44 PM   
DaddysInkedSlut


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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania


quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

It's a lot sadder when someone writes you specifically because you are a single mother, targeting your children.


I totally agree!


The saddest part of that is there are many more of these sorts that target single mothers in the real world.



It is sad and very true that is exactly why I state it as a limit. What's even worse is most of the ones with that motive dnt come out and say so they are a little more subtle than that typically.

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 5:39:08 PM   
sunshinemiss


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I don't have limits.  I have a good man who doesn't want to harm me.  Keeps things simple.
sunshine

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 5:41:36 PM   
leadership527


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Carol and I don't really deal in limits. And honestly, I can't imagine anything I'd think of as serious limits being any sort of sexual act.

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 5:47:40 PM   
PeonForHer


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

From the top side - NOT.

Limits that I've gotten from clip have included needles and long whips.



Clip can handle knives, but not needles? 

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 5:51:15 PM   
juliaoceania


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quote:

It is sad and very true that is exactly why I state it as a limit.


Unfortunately I do not think that you stating that as a limit would stop a predator from targeting you... Which is why I do not feel the need to state such things as limits. Shockingly I have had very little in the way of requests that I take part in kink involving nonconsenting beings (whether the two legged kind or four legged kind). I haven't had anyone suggest I break any law other than indecent exposure... and these limits are easy enough to state in a conversation...

I do have some less obvious limits...like I don't do gags, because I need to breathe from my mouth, and I freak out at not being able to speak..but the illegal stuff, nope, never had anyone email me with that sort of request, not saying it doesn't happen, but I would be likely to report that to the cops anyways

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 5:56:49 PM   
sunshinemiss


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I have a really strong gag reflex and can't stand to have cloth in my mouth or anything like that.  Sooooo, a smart man wouldn't put a cloth in my mouht.  I think hard limits are more for ourselves when we need the outside structure rather than the inner clarity.  If you know who and what you are, a limit is just... presumed.  I don't have a limit, for example, that if the pollen count is high we don't do breath control because of my asthma.  Instead, we just know to take care of each other.  It's not really something hard and fast for me.  I mean if somebody told me to do something immoral, (bad) illegal, or harmful, I would just laugh.  There was a time I was much more malleable.  Luckily, that time has past.

Best,
sunshine (that was a fast reply btw)

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 6:11:15 PM   
juliaoceania


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quote:

Best,
sunshine (that was a fast reply btw)


Oh, and here I thought I was special enough to merit an actual reply

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 6:14:21 PM   
sunshinemiss


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tut tut.

Silly goose.

Yes, yes... special girl.  Yes, yes.

I wasn't addressing your specific points... also, I said something that could be a bit controverisal (shocking, that).  I just wanted to make sure no one thought I was taking pot shots...

*smooch,
sunshine



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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 6:37:16 PM   
littlewonder


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

It's a lot sadder when someone writes you specifically because you are a single mother, targeting your children.


You've had that too huh? Yup, me too. It makes me feel sick everytime someone brings that up.

It is a shame one has to list such things as limits that one would think are such common sense but unfortunately I've met people who had some truly horrendous kinks and fetishes that have made me have to mention such things.

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 6:39:47 PM   
juliaoceania


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quote:

You've had that too huh? Yup, me too. It makes me feel sick everytime someone brings that up.


Have you reported such communications with the police? I would at least think you would report then on the other side for something like that.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 6:57:50 PM   
Maculate


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut


quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania


quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

It's a lot sadder when someone writes you specifically because you are a single mother, targeting your children.


I totally agree!


The saddest part of that is there are many more of these sorts that target single mothers in the real world.



It is sad and very true that is exactly why I state it as a limit. What's even worse is most of the ones with that motive dnt come out and say so they are a little more subtle than that typically.


No really being on topic to this thread, but I have a friend who recently had her first little one. While she was pregnant, her ex from WAY BACK (who ended it saying he was totally not into her because she was a very shallow and uninteresting person) started calling and texting her VERY OFTEN only to question whether or not she knew the sex of the child yet. I thought it was very creepy and a sure sign of terrible things to come. I finally convinced her that he had no interest in her was only after a situation to become closer to a potential little boy. He was promising her all the wonderful things he had done to her before but any time talking about each others feelings he would shut her down and ignore her for a few days. Such a horrible situation.


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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 6:58:33 PM   
littlewonder


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I've reported those who I met in real life who brought it up.

Amazing how some can seem so normal after months of talking online only to hit you with such things when you meet in real life.

Those I met online I simply put on ignore after chewing them out.

Unfortunately I can't do much these days now that mine is of legal age but it's still disturbing when men bring it up even though I'm no longer searching.

< Message edited by littlewonder -- 7/10/2010 6:59:56 PM >

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 7:03:26 PM   
DaddysInkedSlut


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When it happened to me, it was someone I had meet in person. He not only got slapped across the face but then I called the cops.

< Message edited by DaddysInkedSlut -- 7/10/2010 7:04:59 PM >


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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 7:19:31 PM   
marie2


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GR:

Techincally I don't consider pushable things to be limits. I've done things that I didn't want to do, or like to do, and I've done things that I didn't think I'd ever do, but I can't call them limits, since I did in fact get through them. I enjoy being challenged and taken out of my comfort zone. And the key factor that comes into play for me, is how deeply I'm into the dom mentally...how much influence he has over me. For instance, I don't relish the idea of having needles pierced through my skin, but I won't say I'd never do it, because who the hell knows, maybe someday with someone I'd evolve to having that desire, or at the very least be able to endure it for someone else's pleasure. So I do keep an open mind on certain things that would be "pushable" for me.

Hard limits to me are things that I know I would absolutely never do, and mostly they involve claustrophobia, or something that would gross me out like vomit and feces, or spiders and snakes.

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 8:38:59 PM   
itsmeinLV


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Many of my limits are "soft" ones.  For me, it's not about pushing my limits but rather establishing the trust between us so that I am no longer scared and/or feel uncomfortable to do it with that person.

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 8:50:55 PM   
sweetsub1957


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i have hard limits and soft limits. My hard limits include things like animals, kids, blood, scat.....things that will hurt me physically/emotionally/health-wise, are against the law or my morals. My soft limits include other things, to be pushed and transcended with the right Person that i trust totally.

~sweetsub~

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/10/2010 9:18:55 PM   
alatheia


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It'd depend on the limit. For example I'm mildly claustrophobic, up until i was 10 or 11 Id take the stairs anywhere (i lived on the 9th floor) cause elevators freaked me out. I learned to deal with it but I still get a little freaky if theres a really closed space or somethings preventing me from breathing correctly. Hoods trigger this in me so while Im willing to try it with the right person, it will take some coaxing into and a lot of trust and probably practice lol. Its not something Id choose to do at all.. Its a limit. I don't care for needles at all but im not closed to the idea. In the end, itd depend entirely on the person im playing with and it wouldnt be something id do casually

Now.. scat play... not so much. No amount of coaxing will help with that one. Same for the other most common ones.. kids, no permanent damage of any kind, pets, something that'll land me in jail or the ER (accidents excluded)

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/11/2010 8:38:24 AM   
whiteslavebitch


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Not at all. But that's not as difficult as it sounds, I have the same (hard) limits as MasterK. Anything else is his decision whether it happens or not.

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RE: How "Pushable" are your Limits. - 7/11/2010 8:56:28 AM   
jujubeeMB


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For me, hard limits are called hard limits because they're hard. As in, unmovable. You may be partially referring to me, QSM, from the anal sex thread, and the thing is, if we were playing and you tried to push me towards anal sex, you would very quickly discover that you would be pushing me towards a huge amount of physical damage. My hard limits are things that I will not do, either for physical reasons or psychological reasons. Even if some of those limits changed due to physical changes, deep levels of trust or new desire in me, it would be mine to say without any pushing from my partner.

Soft limits are a slightly different matter, in that most of my soft limits are there because I've never done them before, don't think I would like them and am scared of them. This does not mean they're not limits, it means that with someone I deeply trust, I may someday be open to trying certain things. But again, if I feel pushed, forget it. I know we all want what we can't have in life, but at some point you have to ask yourself whether what you want is the person or the thrill of what you can make that person do that they really don't want to do. And if you want the latter, don't come knocking on my door.

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