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RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:21:40 AM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

Sadly, I agree with Domiguy here.


Why does everyone have to say this kind of shit?

It's okay to agree with me. I am the voice of reason. What the fuck.

Has Domi become the new Pa?

Every time I post you fuckers should be doing this.....

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy


I agree. But there are a shit load of people that cheat that do not seem to care.

What are the statistics on cheating? If this was some sort of an isolated incident I would be more opinionated. This is not pedophilia or some other wacked out practice. this is something regularly undertaken by millions of people.

All I'm saying is at least the guy makes his case in his profile. He makes it is easy for people who are not searching for a "cheater" to avoid him. For that he deserves some props.


I use the word "props" only because I am trying to bang MissAssylum.....I am so dope!



This.
--------


When people start threads you fuckers should just chill and anxiously await my response and then applaud it for it's depth and understanding.

(I only use the word "chill" because I think Miss Assylum would dig that kind of shit)

< Message edited by domiguy -- 7/14/2010 7:22:15 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:23:07 AM   
Jasmineinbloom


Posts: 59
Joined: 4/24/2010
Status: offline 		Domiguy quoted me! I have arrived!

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:23:15 AM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline 		Actually I agree with Domi as well.

I'm not the fidelity police. People cheat all the time.

However, he asked a question about why his search is so difficult. The most likely answer is that he has very little to offer someone given his married and cheating status. If he is honest about it and finds someone willing to take that risk as well as dealing with his lack of honesty to his spouse, who cares?

It's odd to me that this paticular stone is thrown around here so often. It's seems rather incongruent to me that we accept all sorts of odd things that my be harmful but cheating is so horribly overreacted to.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:27:03 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

Actually I agree with Domi as well.

I'm not the fidelity police. People cheat all the time.

However, he asked a question about why his search is so difficult. The most likely answer is that he has very little to offer someone given his married and cheating status. If he is honest about it and finds someone willing to take that risk as well as dealing with his lack of honesty to his spouse, who cares?

It's odd to me that this paticular stone is thrown around here so often. It's seems rather incongruent to me that we accept all sorts of odd things that my be harmful but cheating is so horribly overreacted to.

It may very well have to do with the fact that our activities draw a line at harming others.  That wiitwd is supposed to be based on the concept that the people involved have consented to participate.  His wife hasn't consented to being cheated on.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:31:34 AM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		Thanks Laurell! Not even a trace of a condescending attitude.


Thanks for pointing out how nice bentunits tits are. You are right she is very attractive.


Now off to cause trouble elsewhere.

_____________________________



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Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:38:39 AM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline 		Yep, I do see the distinction LP, I just don't think our glass houses are really as tidy as people like to express. It's easy to say what we do is consentual and not harmful, but I am fully aware that every time I play I take a risk at being harmed. It's a risk I accept. In the vanilla world I would be highly criticised for taking that risk and most likely my mental health would be scrutinized. I'm not going to accept my glass house and say it's cleaner than anyone else's is. I'm aware that others may vehemently disagree with me and they are certainly welcome to and I see their side of it. It is however, my personal opinion that cheating is not the end of the world albeit an incredibly foolish way to deal with a difficult marriage.

Would I play with him? Hell no. But I do feel he has the right to engage in his risky behavior just as all the rest of us do.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:45:44 AM   
BentUnit


Posts: 897
Status: offline 		Why do I feel both complimented and offended that you like my tits, Domi?

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:48:43 AM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

Thanks Laurell! Not even a trace of a condescending attitude.


Thanks for pointing out how nice bentunits tits are. You are right she is very attractive.


Now off to cause trouble elsewhere.



Pfft! Bent has nice tits (really she does, they're fantastic).

Now where's my jersey DG?

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:49:19 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Using fast reply...

This topic falls into the category of refusing to legislate (used in a much broader way here) other people's morality.

Do I think the OP is a scum ball, of course. But We are talking about adults here and quite honestly, the woman married him. I will even go out on the proverbial limb and say that I believe the greater percentage of married people that cheat, showed enough red flags both prior and after the marriage, as to the type of person they were. It is unfortunate that the people they married did not see, usually even refused to see, those red flags. I don't think it is EVER really as simple as poor, ignorant, victim spouse getting shit on by terrible, evil, cheating spouse. The ignorant victims are usually ignorant by choice, either consciously or subconsciously.

That does not absolve the cheater at all. Just saying that the wife probably knows and if she behaves as though she doesn't, she is either fooling him and/or herself.

Big picture, I think all parties get exactly what they want/think they deserve.


< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 7/14/2010 7:51:41 AM >

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:50:46 AM   
BDSMPleasures


Posts: 26
Joined: 4/12/2010
Status: offline 		Thank you..

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:52:43 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BDSMPleasures

Thank you..


Dude, don't hurt your arm/shoulder patting yourself on the back. We all still think you are a putz.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to BDSMPleasures)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:54:09 AM   
BentUnit


Posts: 897
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BDSMPleasures

Thank you..


We are talking ABOUT you slime ball, not to you.

Now, STFU!!


(in reply to BDSMPleasures)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:56:32 AM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: BDSMPleasures

Thank you..


Dude, don't hurt your arm/shoulder patting yourself on the back. We all still think you are a putz.




Yeah, we just support is right to putzery.


"putzery is not the kinda word that is gonna turn MissA on is it?



_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:56:32 AM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: BDSMPleasures

Thank you..


Dude, don't hurt your arm/shoulder patting yourself on the back. We all still think you are a putz.



Agreed. Whether you are an attractive potential mate and whether we have the right to be the morality police are two different issues.

As I stated very early in this thread, if you really want to make your search easier, deal with your marriage issue. One of the highest priorities on my list when looking for a prospective partner is honesty. You lack it and there's no getting around that. Trust is very important in wiitwd, your situation makes that trust rather conditional in my opinion.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 7:58:16 AM   
NYLass


Posts: 409
Joined: 12/30/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BentUnit

quote:

ORIGINAL: BDSMPleasures

Thank you..


We are talking ABOUT you slime ball, not to you.

Now, STFU!!



 

Best comment yet.



_____________________________

I need a pithy saying here.

(in reply to BentUnit)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 8:03:05 AM   
WinsomeDefiance


Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline 		Yep, you are pretty much not fucked, OP. You say 28% cheat? Well, of the 28%, how many are female? How many are into BDSM/D's? Options are limited. Then you factor in your inherent distrust, and inequitable demands of proving oneself when you are unable to do so yourself. Well, yeah. NOT fucked. Royally.

Have no fear. If nothing else, I've learned that for every dumbass, self-destructive, lying, cheating motherfucker - there is another just like him with tits. Hang in there. You'll find someone to fuck up your marraige with in no time.

May you reap all the rewards of what you deserve,

WinD

(in reply to BentUnit)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 8:37:58 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		Hey, Jeffff, you have laurel and are keeping LaT as your les Domme on the side, and you're still wondering about turning on MissA? The OP could take lessons from you...

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to WinsomeDefiance)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 8:42:30 AM   
NYLass


Posts: 409
Joined: 12/30/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Hey, Jeffff, you have laurel and are keeping LaT as your les Domme on the side, and you're still wondering about turning on MissA? The OP could take lessons from you...


Anteaters are teh hawtest, yanno.


_____________________________

I need a pithy saying here.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 8:49:17 AM   
wandersalone


Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BDSMPleasures

A friend suggested I post a message here as it helped her find her Dom.



Dayum they must really hate you!!

You have had a trial by fire with your posting here on the intro thread.  There is a possibility that on the CM side you may have more success in finding a married woman who wants to submit to a dominant who cannot sort out his marital issues.  Kudos to you for stating on your profile that you are married. 
Have a think about what you can offer the submissive -
  • how often will you be able to see them,
  • how often will you be able to contact them,
  • will they be able to call you the night after a scene if they are experiencing sub drop,
  • will aftercare need to be brief to enable you to get home before your wife gets suspicious
  • do you see any incongruence between calling yourself a dominant and not having the internal strength to sort out your own unhappy primary relationship
  • what if you fall in love with the submissive
  • what if they fall in love with you
  • what if either or both spouses find out
  • are there children involved and if so what will the impact be if your affair/s is/are discovered

..... I could come up with a million more questions but these are just a start

I wish you all the best....grins, need I mention that you may need it!!

(is it just me or do married men get way more flak than married women seeking a bit on the side?)


_____________________________

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. Martin Luther King
Godmother of the subbie mafia
My all time favourite threads
http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=2002501
http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=790885

(in reply to BDSMPleasures)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Challenges in Finding a Submissive Female - 7/14/2010 8:52:27 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Hey, Jeffff, you have laurel and are keeping LaT as your les Domme on the side, and you're still wondering about turning on MissA? The OP could take lessons from you...


Ahem........who is keeping WHO???


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 80
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