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RE: How do you 'reward' your sub/slave? - 9/21/2010 12:00:18 PM   
bliss4us09


Posts: 106
Joined: 3/31/2009
Status: offline 		Nothing at all wrong with asking the question but wouldn't it make more sense to be asking the sub? Who else is going to know what she would consider a reward?

(in reply to notomorrow)
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RE: How do you 'reward' your sub/slave? - 9/21/2010 12:09:10 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		Fair comment as far as it goes, but I would then posit that to do that ruins any chance of making the reward a surprise if one wants to. Surely any experienced Dominant worth their salt would also know his or her sub/slave well enough to know what she or her wants, don't you think?

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Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

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(in reply to bliss4us09)
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RE: How do you 'reward' your sub/slave? - 9/26/2010 1:15:42 PM   
Catnip24


Posts: 2
Joined: 9/26/2010
Status: offline 		.


< Message edited by Catnip24 -- 9/26/2010 1:19:05 PM >

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RE: How do you 'reward' your sub/slave? - 9/26/2010 1:19:37 PM   
Catnip24


Posts: 2
Joined: 9/26/2010
Status: offline 		notomorro,
I'm sure you know that it's different strokes for different folks and all that, but I understand your need to ask.
Everyone is different, but the following tips are from my experience of being in a romantic BDSM relationship, not just a BDSM buddy thing.
Once you've found a girl you like try building on the relationship before diving in at the deep end with the BDSM talk. I have the utmost respect for my first and only Master because he took things at my pace, that is a reward in itself. I care for him very much, so for me, when I've been an obiedient kitten I adore small gestures like a kiss, a scratch behind the ear or verbal encouragement.
When however I've taken hell of alot of pain over a long period of time and pleased him, I really, really appreciate having more vanilla fulfillment (such as a regular orgasm!)
You could also make little rewards more fun and fetishistic by relating them to your favourite BDSM play, i.e. she's been a very good kitten? give her a sugar mouse to play with or a saucer of milk to drink on all fours, she's been a stellar pony? Make her neigh and suck your cock for a horse mint. She's been a spotless french maid? tie her up with her stockings and pleasure her with the other end of the feather duster until she's crying with humiliation and delight.
.. You get the idea.
Finally. We like bad surprises too. Sometimes it's good to spice it up and tease a little, make us think we're in for a nice treat, then get out the extra large whip / extra burny rope / extra sharp clothes pegs / or just whatever she really finds difficult. This reminds a slave not to expect treats too often but to keep trying for them just for your pleasure.
Hope this hasn't been too patronising and helps!


< Message edited by Catnip24 -- 9/26/2010 1:24:13 PM >

(in reply to notomorrow)
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RE: How do you 'reward' your sub/slave? - 9/26/2010 3:01:39 PM   
spikyrob


Posts: 1
Joined: 1/17/2010
Status: offline 		.

(in reply to Catnip24)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: How do you 'reward' your sub/slave? - 9/26/2010 3:16:36 PM   
Bravado


Posts: 87
Joined: 6/15/2010
Status: offline 		"Good girl."

That has always been sufficient. Past relationships with those who were willing to serve involved intense initial programming to that and many other phrases. If she is exceptionally pleasing, a romantic dinner does the trick. Just because she's submissive and servile does not mean she isn't a girl. Most women would enjoy something romantic as a reward, but just don't let them get too used to it, or else she'll start expecting it. And then she'll want you to clean up after yourself, and take the trash out. Next thing you know it's a white picket fence, two kids, and a woman ruling your life...

Not from personal experience, mind you, but it happens. As long as they're both happy, I think it's pleasant.

(in reply to spikyrob)
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RE: How do you 'reward' your sub/slave? - 9/26/2010 3:38:00 PM   
NorthernGent


Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: notomorrow

I am new to all of this, and while methods of punishment for misbehavior is fairly obvious, what about rewards for good behavior? I assume it could be different for every relationship and person, but how do you handle that situation? If you're s sub/slave, how do you want to be rewarded?



If it helps.....set your stall out in terms of the type of behaviour you expect.....and don't reward that....it is a minimum requirement....

In terms of reward...perhaps iron out that which you consider going above and beyond the call of duty...and reward that...

In terms of the nature of  rewards? Depends on what she likes/values.....

_____________________________

I have the courage to be a coward - but not beyond my limits.

Sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

(in reply to notomorrow)
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RE: How do you 'reward' your sub/slave? - 9/28/2010 2:15:55 PM   
BbcSlutKc


Posts: 60
Joined: 9/25/2010
Status: offline 		everyone likes to be rewarded sometimes. and someone telling me good girl just isnt gonna cut it. i guess thats y i am not a slave/sub 24/7. i would suggest that the times u do want to do something nice or special for the one that pleases u nonstop, get to know her and what she likes then decide the type or "reward" from there. every woman is different so this is a difficult question to answer. and it is awesome to see u not being selfish and thinking about her. just remember to love and respect her because u r her number 1 and honestly there are not many who will make u, me or anyone else number 1.

(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: How do you 'reward' your sub/slave? - 9/29/2010 4:30:49 AM   
Owlet


Posts: 35
Joined: 12/2/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

I think the only worthwhile reward is multiple orgasms.

Or really hot shoes.


^ This.

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 69
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