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CaringandReal -> RE: Obeying isnt 1 +1 (9/25/2010 7:48:53 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Icarys
I can't say that I don't expect a lot out of the people I'm with but there is room for mistakes.(Truthfully it seems so little but in this day and age it's like asking for the world itself it would seem) I really just expect a person to hold up their end of the deal by having an all around good attitude about their position and life in general. Know what I mean?
Sure. I and the people I work with do that all the time, in our small but highly motivated and rapidly rising comapny. We're all happy to be part of something interesting and while most of us aren't getting rich at it, the company has had talent so far at picking employees who are highly self-motivated and self-disciplined. Whatever the person's responsibilities, they just do what it takes to get it done--on time and in good shape. I'm a bit flabbergasted to be working in such an environment--where the majority, not the minority, excel. Most work environements I've had the "pleasure" to have visited in the past are top heavy with slackers trying to do as little as possible, hostile game players, sabotaguers, complainers, blamers of others, gossips and intriguists, petty tyrants who do nothing except make others lives miserable, emotional basketcases who are gone half the time, and all the other ugly personality types you get in the corporate mix. (Hmm, my list kind of reminds me of this mesage board.) But this strange little company has almost none of that. Maybe a little mild gossiping occasionally, but nothing intentionally malicious. The employess have, for the most part, have nice normal personalities and (gasp) mean well (sales people excluded--they can be jerks, but in most companies, I've noticed, they are something of a company unto themselves with their own rules and moral code. Unfortuantely, they are a necessary company. Even more unfortunately, they know it. :/) Once in a while a person has come in who ran counter to this general attitude, but such people almost always opted out on their own volition--they quit! Perhaps something in dishonest or emotionally off people makes them abhor/avoid a sane work climate? Almost nobody get sick here, too, which is rather spooky.
Anyway, I think I understand what you mean in a bdsm sense. Some people on here have described that attitude as generous or giving. It's also intelligent and practical, as it indicates you know your place and role in the relationship and don't (falsely) see the role of the other person as automatically less generous or more taking or privleged: you don't automatically think that they have it better than you because they are the dominant. In my experience, what makes it extremely challenging to keep up an all around good attitude, is very long denial (years) of normal human needs for company, for touch, for sex, for even hearing another's voice. Isolation gets dispiriting, particularly if its imposed after a long natual isolation (like that which occurs when one's mate dies). After a certain lengthy point, the longer it goes on the worse your emotional climate can get, because you begin to lose all hope of anything real ever happening. Still, hard times happen in relationships, even solid bdsm relationships, and there is no hard rule that says they can't sometimes they happen in the very early stages. I think that even under considerable duress, it's important to see something you think is potentially extremely worthwhile through to the end, doing your best all the while. Part of "holding up your end of the deal," after all, is not quitting prematurely.
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